I am a relationship with a girl in naija while I am in UK. I knew her casually back then when I was in najia, I ran into her the last time I traveled to naija and collected her number. I spend a average of 30min on phone with her for the last 8 months. She has agreed to go out with me. I guess I like her enough to marry her.
Pls I need your advice from anyone with experience. Should I go ahead to marry her without courting her? What of if I discover some character traits that I don’t like? Or the time spend on phone is it enough to really know her?

Well from what i have seen n witnessed from people around me i would advise you to court her first!
Depending on where u're planning to live (once married) it can get tricky.
If back home - you might start discovering skeletons that had not been mentioned or referred to during your phone conversations.
If here in the UK - there are girls that use guys to come over here, get their papers n vamoos or even start mixing with their old school mates that introduces them to certain people, parties, their eyes being to open n shine waka-waka  n once that happens, well - everybody is getting is getting a taste.
On the other hand there are those that are true n genuine - although rare.

Court her, learn for yoslf the kind of person she truely is before commiting yoslf!

i guess so, since u have been talkin to her 4 d past 8months u should no  d type of person she is. some people court for just 2months and get married and are happy.

I will like to court her, but i wouldn't have time to spend with her in naija and she couldn't get an entry clearance since were not married.

Hey Bro!, please "TRY" not to be foolish, all in the name of love. Some might call it a "leap of faith", i'l call it "leap into death"! Love isnt all it take to make a relationship work. i bet u'll get married to her and u'll be worn out in weeks.

Save yourself the heartache and find someone u can spend time with to know each other.Online dating, phone call dating, whatever peple call it is all crap. why? percentage success is 0.1%, do the maths!

Court first. And please try to be in the same place with your girl. Some girl who have boyfriends abroad mess around here in Naija. Want stories? ive got a number of them.

Phone calls alone is not enough to know someone. Its possible to fake almost anything on phone.

so what have been doin to her 4 d past 8months

@ Anabell
so what have been doin to her 4 d past 8months

I have been trying to get to know her better by spending time with her on phone.

and dt same as courtin.

@topic i kind of agree with @ ibdat

court her first not that phone thingy y'all doing !

u dont have to be with someone all d time to court , if u want to no other tin about her u could tell ur friends or ur peaple to check her out 4 u

Lets be realistic peeps . .  

Now of course, we all want you to court her, who wouldn't?

But just for a jiffy, while we're being realistic lets be practical too (which is what i think anabell was trying to do)

For you to really "court" her, you'll have to travel down to naija and spend at least 3-6 months with her. Experience what day to day life is like for the both of you or invite her to the Uk and spend sometime with her there. Now our dearest poster, are you ready to do either one of those?? We can't say "court her, court her" when we know its almost practically impossible due to their living conditions??

Now before you start smiling, remember this; a girl who is bent/determined on achieveing something, be it for the good reasons or not, will put up her best behaviour whether its an act or her real self

You see what i've always believed?? anybody you falls in love with someone, while you're abroad (i mean and the person is in Nigeria, Cameroun, etc.), the chances of you knowing their true selves is 50:50 because its either they're acting or they're not!!

Anabell darl. please allow me

anabell:

u don't have to be with someone all d time to court , if u want to no other tin about her u could tell your friends or your peaple to check her out for you

Now that might be your one and only resort. I'm not saying you should hire detectives, but ask friends, relations, even your parents sef, to watch her closely.

_{I hate to do this to a fellow "eve" but hey if she's clean, i know "my girl" will pull through, i hope she does}

One thing she cannot hide is who she is behind you, esp. when she isn't farmiliar with those doing the "project".
The people you put on it should not, i mean should not know of each other, that is to assure accurate details free for manipulations or jealousy. After you've heard from two parties and their answers are not rhyming, go for another two. This is a sacrifice you have to pay to get the best .

I'll also advice you sincerely to put it into prayers too, remeber God starts working when the power of man has failed, and to those He loves, he reveals things . With God by your side, you'll get the answer you've long been waiting for.

And for that time being, do your courting on phone (i'll choose to believe that before you asked her for her number, and went ahead to call her, you saw something strikingly likeable in her, she stood out somewhat??), you've seen her, she's seen you so its not totally a blind date. When you get down to naija, spend some time with her, If the "detectives" find her unwanting, then go get your woman

Best of luck bro!!!! (i'll be cheering for you to get your "happily ever after" ending)

@topic, cute ass has said it all.Goodluck

Dude you just answer your own question what if you find out something about her that you can't stand?

besides are you that Hot that you wan marry stranger? na watin your mama and papa go say??

without 'courting' her?? wadda?

Wow--Cut-Ass, Ur Replies r alwayz Long Abeg WHY?



Yes MARRY her!

jaybaby:

Wow--Cut-Ass, your Replies r alwayz Long Abeg WHY?

Because i like stating everything i think, not half of it, is that ok with you??

Its just for the benefit of the beneficiary, noone else. Anybody that thinks its too long for their reading, can jump over. Believe me i won't draw you back

a friend of mine did the same thing and it worked out for her,u cld try ur luck too and if it doesnt work out u can always opt out.but most importantly anyway pray over it.

no need to court, just go for it.

wot an id


seriously, COURT!
get to know her better.

you can be anything you want to be on the phone. do you feel obliged to marry her in a hurry abi wetin?
get to know her first.

Court her MARRY me

@ hannydarl

hannydarl:

Court her MARRY me

u dey find husband? gaylord is available ooo

gaylord:

@ hannydarl
u dey find husband? gaylord is available ooo

r u not looking for a oyinbo

i wont honestly i mean i wont marry her as u said in ur post that u just knew/met ger casually while u were in/went to nigeria nigeria. trying to know her on phone man to mi it doesnt feel good enough. people will always say wat they r not on phone if u get wat am trying 2 say. its just my own opinion thou i wont dare try to do it.people might say i no chop liver oo but every 1 as there own opinions so do wat u think its right 4 u. peace

@ blue sky
Why you feel say i dey look for Oyinbo? me am not picky o anywhere wey love and happiness dey there i pitch ma tent.



@gay lord
dat ya name dey freak me i dont want to share my man with other men o if not i for consider you.

I visited my friend in the village few years ago. while peeling Oranges  and enjoying ourselves beside the bush, i saw a young girl coming back  from the church with her mother, she was goodlooking and possessed most of the physical qualities that i wanted in a wife, few days later i went back to enquire about her and before you cld say jack,, we got married without any form of courtship except for the few times i spent with her before introduction,
   She s remained a wonderful wife since then, sooo, follow your heart

@gay lord
that ya name dey freak me i don't want to share my man with other men o if not i for consider you.
[quote][/quote]

Another Sexual discrimination

Dont worry i don divorce all other mens

hannydarl:

@ blue sky
Why you feel say i dey look for Oyinbo? me am not picky o anywhere wey love and happiness dey there i pitch ma tent.



@gay lord
that ya name dey freak me i don't want to share my man with other men o if not i for consider you.

sorry girl, i wasnt saying u looked white.
Gaylord, made a thread about ''how to toast a white girl in london''
so i thought he was looking for some1 white not black.
I dont even know how u look like

eric, na so u do ur own?
Good luck with married life

hannydarl:

Court her MARRY me

@topic,

Should you court her? NO!

Please court her.That shouldn't even be a question to be asked. Someone said "try your luck". . I pray that doesn't stick to your brain. How can you be trying your luck when we talking about marriage? I mean, I know marriage ain't a life sentence but on the other hand one should have enough time to make up his/her mind on a life partner to avoid more trouble .

For some it works out, for some it doesn't. But honestly, one has to be careful. Long-distance r/ship ain't the same as long-distance courting I can date someone far from me but if we talking about ringing the wedding bells, umm. . we'll definitely have to move closer, ejo!

from xp dont fall for it. PLS be real, you nee to know who she really is. you cant know her over the phone even for the next 12 years. we all can act, so weak up. dont just think of marriage now ok. try to come around more spend some time with her. take it from me your idea about somethings will change