Bible researcher interviewed Hausa, Yoruba and Ibo folks to know what they would rather change in the bible if they were given the chance. The Hausa man said: "Walahi, the adulteress Jesus asked to go should have been stoned fa!" The Ibo man replied: "NNA, I can't understand why Judas returned the money after selling Jesus. In short, he is not a good business man." The Yoruba man retorted: Jesus should have waited just one more day before raising Lazarus from the dead. We had already paid for the ASO -EBI. At least he should have allowed us enjoy the OWAMBE before performing his miracle .

u r damn crazy mam.

gd one

yeah, good one.
Cheers

@chumakk
which one would u have changed in the bible?

Na really no be your fault as you no see work do abi?well thats was cool man

Na really no be your fault as you no see work do abi?well thats was cool man

That was cool man. A typical Nigerian scenario

Hello All,
If you are given a chance to effect just a change in the Bible, what would you have changed?

ncie 1

A MAN"S YOUNGEST SON ASKED HIS FATHER: "Daddy what is d difference between "potential"and"reality"? Dad:I wil show u.Dad turned to his wife and ask her:"Wld u sleep wit Tom Cruise for 1 Million Dollars? Wife answers: "Yes of Course! I would never waste such an opportunity to be a millionaire" The Dad asked his daughter if she would sleep wit Will Smith for 2 million dollars? Daughter:"Wow! Yes Yes! I will that's my fantasy" So Dad turned to his elder son and asks himon,wil u sleep wit Denzel Washington for 1 Million dollars? Elder Son replied:"Yeah! Why not? Imagine what I cld do wit 1 Million dollars, I would never hesitate!"So d Father turns to his younger son and said:"u see son, "OTENTIALLY"we r sittin on 4 Million But in"REALITY" we are livin wit 2 prostitutes n 1 gay

ehat are u guys taking about

chuks chuks

Little DAVID comes home from first grade and tells his father that they learned about the history of Valentine's Day.

"Since Valentine's Day is for a Christian saint and we're Jewish," he asks, "will God get mad at me for giving someone a valentine?"

His father thinks a bit, then says, "No, I don't think God would get mad. Who do you want to give a valentine to?"

"Osama bin Laden," David says.

"Why Osama bin Laden," his father asks in shock.

"Well," Josh says, "I thought that if a little American Jewish boy could have enough love to give Osama a valentine, he might start to think that maybe we're not all bad, and maybe start loving people a little bit. And if other kids saw what I did and sent valentines to Osama, he'd love everyone a lot. And then he'd start going all over the place to tell everyone how much he loved them and how he didn't hate anyone anymore."

His father's heart swells and he looks at his boy with newfound pride. "DAVID, that's the most wonderful thing I've ever heard."

"I know," DAVID says, "and once that gets him out in the open, the ARMY could blow the shit out of him."

Two Arabs boarded a flight out of London. One took a window seat and the other sat next to him in the middle seat. Just before takeoff, an American sat down in the aisle seat.

After takeoff, the American kicked his shoes off, wiggled his toes and was settling in when the Arab in the window seat said,"I need to get up and get a beer".

"Don't get up," said the American, "I'm in the aisle seat. I'll get it for you".

As soon as he left, one of the Arabs picked up the American's shoe and spat in it. When he returned with the beer, the other Arab said, "That looks good, I'd really like one, too". Again, the American obligingly went to fetch it.

While he was gone the other Arab picked up his other shoe and spat in it too. When the American returned, they all sat back and enjoyed the flight.

As the plane was landing, the American slipped his feet into his shoes and knew immediately what had happened.

"Why does it have to be this way?" he asked. "How long must this go on? This fighting between our nations? This hatred? This animosity? This spitting in shoes, pissing in beers?"

Two Arabs boarded a flight out of London. One took a window seat and the other sat next to him in the middle seat. Just before takeoff, an American sat down in the aisle seat.

After takeoff, the American kicked his shoes off, wiggled his toes and was settling in when the Arab in the window seat said,"I need to get up and get a beer".

"Don't get up," said the American, "I'm in the aisle seat. I'll get it for you".

As soon as he left, one of the Arabs picked up the American's shoe and spat in it. When he returned with the beer, the other Arab said, "That looks good, I'd really like one, too". Again, the American obligingly went to fetch it.

While he was gone the other Arab picked up his other shoe and spat in it too. When the American returned, they all sat back and enjoyed the flight.

As the plane was landing, the American slipped his feet into his shoes and knew immediately what had happened.

"Why does it have to be this way?" he asked. "How long must this go on? This fighting between our nations? This hatred? This animosity? This spitting in shoes, pissing in beers?"

Little Johnny came home from school one day slightly confused. His mother was Jewish and his father was black. So Johnny says, "Mom, am I more Jewish or more black?"

"What does it really matter? You'll just have to ask your father", his mother tells him. So Johnny's father gets home from work and Johnny asks the same question, "Dad, am I more Jewish or more black?" "What kind of a question is that, does it really matter? Why do you want to know if you're more Jewish or black?" asks his dad.

"Well, it's like this dad. Tommy down the street wants to sell his bicycle for $50, I don't know whether to Jew him down to $25, or wait till its dark and steal the fucker.

A little black boy goes into the kitchen where his mother is baking. He puts his hands in the flour and coats his face with it. He looks at his mother and says "Look Momma,  I'm a white boy." His mother slaps him hard on the face and says "Boy go show your Daddy."

The boy goes into the living room and says "Look Daddy,  I'm a white boy." His Daddy slaps him on the face too and says "Boy, go show your grandmother."

"Look Granny, I'm a white boy." She slaps him on the face and sends him back to his mother.

His mother says "Well did you learn something from all this?"

The boy shakes his head and says " I sure nuff did,  I've only been a white boy for five minutes and I already hate you fucking black people."

quite good

More Thoughts On Aging
- The aging process could be slowed down if it had to work its way through Congress.

- You're getting old when you're sitting in a rocker and you can't get it started.

- You're getting old when you wake up with that morning-after feeling, and you didn't do anything the night before.

- The cardiologist's diet: if it tastes good, spit it out.

- Doctor to patient: I have good news and bad news: the good news is that you are not a hypochondriac.

- It's hard to be nostalgic when you can't remember anything.

- You know you're getting old when you stop buying green bananas.

- Last Will and Testament: Being of sound mind, I spent all my money.

- When you lean over to pick something up off the floor, you ask yourself if there is anything else you need to do while you are down there.

- You find yourself in the middle of the stairway, and you can't remember if you were downstairs going up or upstairs going down.

NICE jokes guys

u tirayi

osereka:

u tirayi

what do u mean?

@chumakk,
I advice you read Sam Milla's posts before you place your own.It seems your source is the same as he's and you are just reiterating his posts.

Where are my guys
pls help look for them
I give whatever you

help!!!help!!!help!!!!

Really cool jokes!
Esp the first abt chaging the Bible!

chumakk:

Where are my guys
pls help look for them
I give whatever you

help!!!help!!!help!!!!

You resurrected after 4yrs Your guys have all been kicked out of NL

baby.me
funny name

You resurrected after 4yrs Your guys have all been kicked out of NL

You will join them soon

ROTFLMAO!!

Chumakk keep this train moving, u can always do better!