Does He Want A Breakup? If He Wants One, Y Cant He Tell Me? - Romance - Nairaland
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| Does He Want A Breakup? If He Wants One, Y Cant He Tell Me? by JstTinking: 4:17pm On Sep 22, 2010 |
Hello all, Have dis little problem?Been dating a guy for over 6 months, he has started talking of marriage but we are in a long-distance relationship. I went over to his location on an official assignment from my work, all was well the first week, then d 2nd wk, he stopped picking or returning my calls. i went to his office, he said that he is not upset or angry with me but there are a lot of things clouding his head and he is trying to clear his head and that he would come to see me later that evening. I asked him if he had changed his mind about us, but he just said he would come and see me and we would talk. He did not come that evening. I left his location later that weekend without us communicating and returned to my base. Two weeks later, i sent him a message and called to ask if he was still in d relationship? he said that he would call me to talk about it. Till this date, he has not called. This is confusing? There were no quarrels or misunderstanding. He was loving and checking on me through out the first week, even the morning before he stopped picking or returning calls, he called me himself to check on me? This is about 3 weeks now that he has not called me or stayed in contact. i have not contacted him, except when i went to his office and to ask where we were in the relationship? Ladies? Have u been in this situation? What did you do? did he ever come back? Guys? Could u help me out? is this a break up that he cant tell me to my face? why did not he tell me to my face the times i asked if it was a break-up if it is what he wanted? |
| Re: Does He Want A Breakup? If He Wants One, Y Cant He Tell Me? by sohiemi(m): 4:30pm On Sep 22, 2010 |
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| Re: Does He Want A Breakup? If He Wants One, Y Cant He Tell Me? by babyme1(f): 4:40pm On Sep 22, 2010 |
s.ohiemi: Did he say he heard something about her? No! He's just being insensitive and selfish. @OP stop calling him and concentrate on other things. If he want you he will come back, but if he doesn't pls move on with your life. Don't live on the assumption that he's still into you when he's not. |
| Re: Does He Want A Breakup? If He Wants One, Y Cant He Tell Me? by 1102(m): 4:41pm On Sep 22, 2010 |
 Hehehehehehe, I love it when Guyz are tired of a Gurl attitude and body, they simply complain they are busy and tired and stuffs, Ms poster.please carry your BAG and try the next Bus-stop,the guy is obviously tired~ |
| Re: Does He Want A Breakup? If He Wants One, Y Cant He Tell Me? by Nobody: 4:43pm On Sep 22, 2010 |
@poster this man doesnt want you any longer but hasnt got the guts to let you know, he has no respect for you or the relationship you guys have. move on with your life because you can bet your nairas that he has already moved on. when that new relationship he is in will crash, thats when he will come running back to you as a spare tyre. |
| Re: Does He Want A Breakup? If He Wants One, Y Cant He Tell Me? by Rocktation(f): 4:46pm On Sep 22, 2010 |
You just chill, girl. Don't be too fast to think that the 'it' he wants to talk about is basically your relationship. He may just want to explain other things in relation with what's distancing him from you. And yeah, there comes a time in every relationship when a lady/guy would give each other some space by not calling and all that, and for no plausible reason whatsoever. This may not be the case however, since 6months is a lil too early for that, but i advice that you wait it out and hope for the best. |
| Re: Does He Want A Breakup? If He Wants One, Y Cant He Tell Me? by JstTinking: 4:59pm On Sep 22, 2010 |
s.ohiemi:My friends? because of d distance in our relationship, we have not met each other's friends face to face bt my friends knows he exists and vice versa. so i dnt know or think it kud be a reason cos they wnt be able to contact him. MRbrownJAY: hmmm, very possible, bt all of a sudden? like yesterday, u say u love me and today, u just dissappeared? --190--:Funny enough, we have never been intimate, he tried when i was there but i told him i was not ready he was like k, Rocktation: hmmmm |
| Re: Does He Want A Breakup? If He Wants One, Y Cant He Tell Me? by sohiemi(m): 5:09pm On Sep 22, 2010 |
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| Re: Does He Want A Breakup? If He Wants One, Y Cant He Tell Me? by 1102(m): 5:19pm On Sep 22, 2010 |
^^ Gbam u took my mouth out of the words!!  |
| Re: Does He Want A Breakup? If He Wants One, Y Cant He Tell Me? by JstTinking: 5:27pm On Sep 22, 2010 |
s.ohiemi: Nothing like that from other guys when i was with him!!!! Hmmm, when i call him to ask whats wrong? or go to see him at his office? he says i would call you. seems like he is avoiding discussions!! or maybe he has found a gal dat has opend heaven 4 him nd he is no longa interestin in your platonic rel.!!! Very heart breaking |
| Re: Does He Want A Breakup? If He Wants One, Y Cant He Tell Me? by omofat: 5:36pm On Sep 22, 2010 |
He's just not that into you! |
| Re: Does He Want A Breakup? If He Wants One, Y Cant He Tell Me? by Omolola1(f): 5:39pm On Sep 22, 2010 |
hmmn! common line |
| Re: Does He Want A Breakup? If He Wants One, Y Cant He Tell Me? by JstTinking: 5:42pm On Sep 22, 2010 |
Omolola1: wots ur take on this? |
| Re: Does He Want A Breakup? If He Wants One, Y Cant He Tell Me? by Nobody: 5:44pm On Sep 22, 2010 |
JstTinking: its not suddenly, it seems like its from the moment you guys got much closer. dont get me wrong but maybe he discovered something about you when you came around that he didnt know about via this long distance relationship. |
| Re: Does He Want A Breakup? If He Wants One, Y Cant He Tell Me? by blapo(m): 5:45pm On Sep 22, 2010 |
there are two ways to this its either he is still into the relationship or not, just hope for the worst and move on with life, if he wants you he will surely run back to you, but the curiosity will just not let you be, i feel ur pain. But in my opinion he is through with you or needs to clarify some things |
| Re: Does He Want A Breakup? If He Wants One, Y Cant He Tell Me? by 1102(m): 5:51pm On Sep 22, 2010 |
MRbrownJAY: come here, Gimme a Hug U just hit your head on the nail~  |
| Re: Does He Want A Breakup? If He Wants One, Y Cant He Tell Me? by omega25red(m): 5:54pm On Sep 22, 2010 |
when you say long distance relationship did you mean you met online and communicated by phone for months until the initial meeting? because if that is the case, i sorry to say but he saw you and got turned off (sorry to say because no one wants to hear it but the truth is harsh) I hope you didn't sleep with him either because home boy certainly is not interested anymore. He seems to be one of those no game immature boys who will say anything like talking about marriage to get in a girls pants and afterwards loose interest. I'm sorry but i would advice you to cut your loses and keep it moving and stop holding on to an idea of a relationship that doesn't exist anymore |
| Re: Does He Want A Breakup? If He Wants One, Y Cant He Tell Me? by Omolola1(f): 5:58pm On Sep 22, 2010 |
@OP, it might be that he didnt like what he saw. Give him some time since he said he would xplain things to u~ |
| Re: Does He Want A Breakup? If He Wants One, Y Cant He Tell Me? by omega25red(m): 6:04pm On Sep 22, 2010 |
Omolola1:^^ he will never call her to explain anything because the guy has no back bone. the OP is still here asking if he wants a break up it's not like the guy fell in a coma or was in an accident he was just like "i'll call you to explain"anyone ever saw friday? when somkey said don't call me i'll call you and dont ever, ever ever ever ever come around looking for me |
| Re: Does He Want A Breakup? If He Wants One, Y Cant He Tell Me? by Omolola1(f): 6:06pm On Sep 22, 2010 |
well, if the guy is cool, he would call her to at least xplain |
| Re: Does He Want A Breakup? If He Wants One, Y Cant He Tell Me? by Rocktation(f): 6:33pm On Sep 22, 2010 |
Thinking about it now, the thread starter never mentioned meeting him before she visited. Hope it's not really an on-line thing we're giving advice for here? Cos i'd have saved my typing skills with just a single word; SORRY! |
| Re: Does He Want A Breakup? If He Wants One, Y Cant He Tell Me? by JstTinking: 6:37pm On Sep 22, 2010 |
Rocktation: No o! it wasnt an online thing!! we had seen lots of time before that. he has even come to my location more than twice and spent days with me, though i never stayed over cos i live with my parents, but this was the first time i was going to his location in the relationship. |
| Re: Does He Want A Breakup? If He Wants One, Y Cant He Tell Me? by Rocktation(f): 6:43pm On Sep 22, 2010 |
No wahala then. You have my blessings (just punking). All will be cool. Trust God. . .and me. |
| Re: Does He Want A Breakup? If He Wants One, Y Cant He Tell Me? by JstTinking: 6:46pm On Sep 22, 2010 |
omega25red: Not the initial meeting? initial meeting in my own location and then we took it up from there? Didnt do so, he tried to make an attempt but i told him that i wasnt ready and he was like y? we talked about it n he was like k, Dnt understand guys? a guy wud stay with a lady for 8 months, call her, text her everyday, , provide for her, meet her siblings, show her to his relatives just to sleep with her and if she refuses, he just dissappears from the face of the earth -- (cant say if this is for him), and dont want to think that way. if that is true, then WHAT IS THE WORLD TURNING INTO? |
| Re: Does He Want A Breakup? If He Wants One, Y Cant He Tell Me? by sohiemi(m): 6:56pm On Sep 22, 2010 |
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| Re: Does He Want A Breakup? If He Wants One, Y Cant He Tell Me? by omega25red(m): 7:01pm On Sep 22, 2010 |
JstTinking:dont know what the world is turning into but this is reality. I mean think about it who is that busy? that they can't even send a text to say hi. If a man is avoiding you, he is already done with you take it from a man. There is no reason for a man to avoid a woman he likes because we will always find ways of communicating with that woman. The ball is in your court. you can wait till you hear what he has to say or you can cut your loses and move on |
| Re: Does He Want A Breakup? If He Wants One, Y Cant He Tell Me? by JstTinking: 7:06pm On Sep 22, 2010 |
s.ohiemi: Thats my wahala na and i am asking for clarification!!! He called me that morning before he started ignoring me and was gisting with me normally? wot did i do between tht morning and till now o? |
| Re: Does He Want A Breakup? If He Wants One, Y Cant He Tell Me? by InkedNerd(f): 7:07pm On Sep 22, 2010 |
@OP: I think you need to leave him. I know you care for him but he ovbiously doesn't have the decency to tell if the relationship is over. Just tell him that the lack of communication is destroying whatever you have that's left of the relationship. s.ohiemi: What makes you think she did anything? Suppose the man is just a coward and doesn't know how to tell her the truth? |
| Re: Does He Want A Breakup? If He Wants One, Y Cant He Tell Me? by sophy09: 7:09pm On Sep 22, 2010 |
I will advise you to give him sometime. There are times people go through stress and want to be left alone. He might not be sure if he can trust you will whatever is on his mind. Give him 2 weeks and if he does not tell you whatever the problem is, then forget him. He might be disappointed that he did not get "some" from you. Funny thing is that he might have a gf but he looking for a quick lay with you and you disappointed him. |
| Re: Does He Want A Breakup? If He Wants One, Y Cant He Tell Me? by JstTinking: 7:44pm On Sep 22, 2010 |
Inked_Nerd: Wow! this seems to be the general consensus o! Its very heartbreaking, cant believe he would do this but like they say, shit happens!! Sorry guys! you have helped me much o! But one last question? If he comes back, apologising sincerely, and i take him back? Am i stupid? or its just of those things in relationships? or, |
| Re: Does He Want A Breakup? If He Wants One, Y Cant He Tell Me? by omega25red(m): 7:46pm On Sep 22, 2010 |
JstTinking:you are grown and the decisions you make are yours and you alone will have to live with the results of your decisions |
| Re: Does He Want A Breakup? If He Wants One, Y Cant He Tell Me? by InkedNerd(f): 7:51pm On Sep 22, 2010 |
JstTinking: My dear, if you really want to take him back if/when he comes back you really need to sit down and have a talk with him. You must demand to know why he would put you through such a thing. You derves answers!!! If his answers are to your lliking then you need to make the difficult decision on whether or not to take him back. I would like to give you a yes or no answer there could be a number of reasons why he has done what this. Upon speaking to him, you will have a clear mind and a btter ideaabout whether or not you want him back. |
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