If your husband is enjoying a secret rendezvous with another woman, don't run after him with a knife, for the extra-marital affair is a sign that your marriage is a healthy one.

That's the claim of France's most prominent female psychologist Maryse Vaillant in controversial new book on the effects of infidelity on married life, Men, Love, Fidelity, reports The Telegraph .

Vaillant reckons that men who keep mistresses actually improve their marriage.

"[Most] don't do it because they no longer love them, on the contrary," she said. "They simply need breathing space. For such men, who are in fact profoundly monogamous, infidelity is almost unavoidable".

Once women accept that the "pact of fidelity is not natural but cultural", and that infidelity is essential to the "psychic functioning" of certain men who are still very much in love, it can be a "very liberating" for women, she added.

In her book, Vaillant insists that fidelity is not, by definition proof of love.

"They are often men whose father was physically or morally absent , during their childhood. These men have a completely idealised view of their father and the paternal function," she said. "They lack suppleness and are prisoners to an idealised image of a man of duty."


Read more: Extra-marital affairs are good for marriage! - The Times of India http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/life-style/relationships/man-woman/Extra-marital-affairs-are-good-for-marriage-/articleshow/5395063.cms#ixzz13fVXnv1l

So are they telling us ladies to stop been jealous?

hahhhahhaaha this is a good one,let the game begin please,no need to hide anymore if that is the case

Agreed, Fidelity could be cultural!! But infidelity for love for wife ? simply proposterous!! cheating on wife means a guy is enjoying his space? how foolish!!

The end of the world is certainly here. May God help those in the faith to hold on.

@Mr^Cork:

you have to trust this is the only thing that you can do trust me nothing will go wrong with your life if you will start running around just to give space to each other

hinduism:

@Mr^Cork:

you have to trust this is the only thing that you can do trust me nothing will go wrong with your life if you will start running around just to give space to each other

madam your grammer is upside down and i dont under stand, pliss can u retype slowly?

baby.me:

The end of the world is certainly here. May God help those in the faith to hold on.

The end of the world is not here.  Things will only get worse and at this era of time, we might be witnessing the tip of the berg.  The Bible said we should occupy till He comes.  If the article disturbed you, then you are pretty much "uninformed."  This is not even a shocker, it's a norm.  The question is how low far-down the spiral would man as society deem as depraved? 

We shouldn't refer to non-Africans for I believe Africans are worse.  They just don't receive the media hype as others do. 

http://www.modernghana.com/lifestyle/2059/16/ghanaian-woman-marries-her-dog.html

A case of calling white, black and calling black, white. God will help us. God2man.

the book,the writer and the op are making me want to puke, ugh!

Let us not be deceived by such foolishness, these things ought not be so. Consider the ramifications (physical - diseases, life threatening "drama", etc), and especially spiritual (sin) before GOD -

“Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.” - Hebrews 13:4

Hmmm, I hope the article stresses that only men are allowed to use of their "space" to cheat

What a load of bullshit! If you want your "space" then don't get married!!!

i can see