iyes:

Mine was funny and dramatic. I was 15, just finished WAEC, came to the village from Boarding School. My friends who were stil in Forms 3 & 4 were all Day Students (kai, Day Students quick spoil) all had babes. Noticing that I, who was respected because of my higher education level, had none, they arranged a local beauty who had been particularly difficult, as  befitting of my high status for me! Not knowing I was a complete novice in the business.

Now, as a "big boy" from town, I didn't own up, but pretended along. On the D-day, I was asked to stay at their backyard while she was called out of the house toi meet me. Meanwhile, just like the way I prepared for exams, I'd rehearsed my punch line so freequently that I crammed them for recital! And when I heard their footsteps, I bolted!

Later, my disappointed friends came to our house to express their anger, but I lied that I had to hurried come home to use the toilet. Excuse accepted, a make-up session scheduled for the next day. Wahala!

Next day's evening everything was set as previously, only this time, 2 guys were stationed with me while the arranger fetched the girl. This tactic of theirs made me shiver more, as it heaped more pressure on me. And when the babe arrived, they introduced us, and left, but not far enough, just the other side of the corner of the house within an earshot, eavesdropping and whispering among themselves. That was the final straw; I totally blanked out, forgetting all my rehearsed lines - not one word!

The babe, who perhaps was more interested than I was, kept urging me to speak up! After like eternity of silence, mark you I was starring on the floor all along, just walked away with a long drawn hiss "mchewwwwwww"

My guys erupted into bouts of laughter. Eventually I confessed my inexperience to them, and they advised that I should "shack well well" (booze) next time.

A week after, everything went according to plans. Here was I, very high & overconfident on booze. When she arrived, she rested her back on the wall and asked "what again this time?" As I opened my mouth to reel out the magic words, she covered her nose and asked me to step backwards because I reeked of alcohol! I obeyed. But as I wanted to pose by leaning with my elbow on the wall beside her, being drunk, I misjudged the distance and fell flat at her feet!!!

Luckily, 2 factors worked in my favour, the "arranger" is her cousin, otherwise he might have converted for himself beacause as go-between, he'd done 80% of the job. Secondly, the babe liked me very much. Eventually, that was all I did to earn her sending words to me that she'd "heard"!!!

And I, was a proud brand newest boyfriend in town!  

iyes:

@ iice

Even me, I can't resist a chuckle each time I recount the ordeal now. But I assure you, it wasn't funny at all during the period. I experienced a whole spectrum of emotions; excitement, anticipation, fear, shame, anger, frustration, desperation, defeat, resignation, indignation, and when I thought all was lost, elation (when the babe decided to bail me out)

So, how about you. What was your 1st experience like?

My post was about my first experience. But yeah, yours was funny too

My first time, I found it amusing and laughed alot. Ok i always find it amusing and laugh alot. I suppose it would have hurt another person, but he was my friend. . .so he only had small hope that i wouldn't laugh. It was even funnier because he was older and the bad boy of the city. I decided to not let it get to the point of him putting his whole leg in his mouth and agreed.