@ all tanx for you response. I actually got the ex's number and out of curiosity dialled it on my wife's phone and the name with which she saved it appeared. The guy lives in another state so I wouldn't know if he travels to meet her while am away on work trip or otherwise but that's just an evidence that she's doing something wrong. If she could do that, how many more secrets are yet uncovered? more annoying is the fact that my wife would querry every call that comes accross, talk about playing "holier than thou". I will also get DNA test for my supposed kids?? Maybe that will help me press my case should a divorce case ensues.
More annoying is the fact that I can't discuss it with anybody I know, imagine the shame and the feeling of inadequacy that people would probably think 'you were not man enough'. Nairaland has just provided a cover to let off since I ve bottled up to get the full details. I am seriously embarrased to say the least, I can't event mention it amongst my friends coz I would become laughing stock but that's if they don't already know something that I don't know.

@Psalm23

And you think you out of the woods yet?? A man with a mind strong enough to conceive or hide such things is capable of stepping his game up and play it better. I wish you luck.

Sweet T:

@Psalm23

And you think you out of the woods yet?? A man with a mind strong enough to conceive or hide such things is capable of stepping his game up and play it better. I wish you luck.

@ Sweet T, so I take it that; a woman capable of conceiving and hidding such things is also capable of many more deceifull acts. God help somebody but we are getting somewhere.

Sweet T:

@Psalm23

And you think you out of the woods yet?? A man with a mind strong enough to conceive or hide such things is capable of stepping his game up and play it better. I wish you luck.

Please don't wish me badluck  whether I'm out of the woods or not I would like to believe that i've shown my husband and that thing that if they try anything, I can and will find out. Afterall, what are private detectives for? After that incident, I've had my home # changed, I'm on a family cell phone plan with him and thanks to modern technology, even when I'm at work, i can see all incoming and outgoing calls made on our cells and home phone. This is what happens when a spouse causes the other to loose trust and faith in them. And lastly, he also knows that i will divorce him no questions asked and then drive all the way to Virginia and kick that woman's buttt.

pslm23:


Please don't wish me badluck  whether I'm out of the woods or not I would like to believe that i've shown my husband and that thing that if they try anything, I can and will find out. Afterall, what are private detectives for? After that incident, I've had my home # changed, I'm on a family cell phone plan with him and thanks to modern technology, even when I'm at work, i can see all incoming and outgoing calls made on our cells and home phone. This is what happens when a spouse causes the other to loose trust and faith in them. And lastly, he also knows that i will divorce him no questions asked and then drive all the way to Virginia and kick that woman's buttt.

God help us, do we really have to do all these things to stay married? Is this what 21 century marriage has become? No wonder Oprah isn't married. The truth is if a man/woman did not become deceitful overnight, there were symptoms of unfaithfulness right from courtship but some people foolishly close their eyes to it. Lord help me stay faithful when i get married.

.

tpia*:

is that what [b]you would do? [/b]

Did u read the post, I was just explaining besides isn't that a possibilty considering what we are talking about?

jas man:

I think she was also seeing him the same time she was dating you. I think you are probably a better marriage material or just proposed b/4 her ex. To hear low life people like Plappville who is neither married or know anything about marriage is unfortunate, that'sexactely people like that will do and that's sad. Go immediately and get a DNA test for the kids if there's one. She neither love or have any respect for the marriage. Her relationships with her ex's far from over. She knows why she married you, love is not one it, and I wish you luck

Na who con be this again wen dey insult me without knowing me??
I didnt meant any harm in My post. So i am lowlife to u? Well thanks but i do not appreciate ur insults in any way.
I ve come to know that some of u in NL are good in insulting ppl. even thé OP repliés me but didn't trow any insult.

For ur information, i am Happily married with two lovely kids, and even expecting thé 3rd one in few weeks Time.
I said what i said in My reviews post because i do keep in touch with My ex and My Hubby knows him very well.
We dont communicate in secret, i know his Wife to be etc, we are like Family friend.
So to me, that hé is nô longer My lover doesn't mean i should cut him off totally.
As long as hé respects My position as a friend and somebody's Wife, i see nothing wrong.
Infact, Hubby and i has nô secret for each other, we share almost everthing as in, eletronics addresses, phone etc, so why should hé doubt me.
Thé errors i saw in posters Wife is thé fact that she changed thé name and it seem she communicate too frequant with her ex. I nô dey suport bad thing so mâke u plz stop insulting me thank u.

OP, i know you are angry, and so would i, but stay calm. gather your facts and then confront her. definitely do not go around bleeping this person and that person. that is just ridiculous. what she did is wrong, especially if you guys agreed to cut off all ties with others, but your reaction can't be to cheat. you don't even know for sure if she did cheat on you. all you know is that she lied.
it's sad that marriage has become this, bringing people unnecessary headache because they have to play inspector gadget. that's not good for anyone.

@Poster
Am I missing something here? I mean I have been searching and searching to see the unfaithfulness/deceit/cheating committed by the posters wife and couldn't find any. I can only hear talks of deceits and cheating and DNA test and sleeping with members of her family to get back at her(old boy take am easy-o-o wetin?) just because a woman saved her ex's number on her phone with another ID perhaps to avoid making her husband (who she knows better than us posters  ) jealous. ^{I mean the fierceness of the temper being displayed here is enough attestation to how afraid of you she must be.} Chineke Umunwanyi mere anyi ebere (the God of women have mercy on us women!)

This woman did not do anything wrong mister, yes she hid it from you but that is not enough to say that she is being unfaithful. You should have  played smart like Miss Pslm mentioned she did or find another way to get an evidence of unfaithfulness before breathing down on her as you have done.
There are people out there having great innocent family friendly relationship with their spouse's ex, living life and being happy(I mean ex-es that are good and are not unhealthy to the union or still eyeing one of the spouse and wanting to get back) .
One can still have a good friendship devoid of physical contact with ones's ex. We all are the world and the children of the world. You never know what great problem an ex you are in good terms with can help you and your husband or wife sort (I'm not referring to financial related problems). If everybody cuts off communication with exes the world may become one hell of a malicious place, huh!   

there is always two sides to a coin if she actually cheated with her ex. have you cheated on her before ? because sometimes men do things and sometimes think they can get away with it, but I am not saying cheating is good or maybe she does not want to save her ex number with his name because she don't want to hurt your feelings but she might not be cheating you just have to talk to her and make her see reason why she does not need her ex number any more.

^^^

Perhaps poster has realised that his wife is innocent that's why we no longer hear from him.

zayhal:

^^^

Perhaps poster has realised that his wife is innocent that's why we no longer hear from him.

I still don't see any proof from him that she is cheating apart from his vicious imaginations. Finding a number from an ex is not enough evidence of cheating. Lack of trust maybe, but not cheating.

Hey poster. I'm in a similar or even worse situation than you are. Read my post and see for yourself. One thing I can tell you, once a woman begins to lie and decieve, then its as bad or worse than you think. When you trust someone with all ur beart, it take a long while fro certain realities to dawn on you. even if she has not slept with this guy while ur away, she certainly has the inclination to do so if and when the oppurtunity presents itsef. Men cheat with their d, cks, women cheat with their heart and mind, making their infidelity more difficult to forgive and forget. Once a woman switches her mind and heart from her husband, the marriage is just a joke until whenever the man realises it. i found out abt my mife's infidelity from text and email msges she forgot to delete going back two yrs. Can you imagine? She swears that she had no physical contac with the person and was only flirting by email and texts. Tell that to the birds. But even if true, its still the same. mental adultery and physical adultery is still same,
Good luck with your Kids.

Afia, this your hotness is much oooo, what will you do if you really catch her doing things behind your back? patapata, you wil;l send her out and you will keep bleeping as many gals as you can, still does not change the fact that another guy as bleeped your wife,
So back to your post, she did not tell you only because you would suspect her of having an affair with him and you will cause a lot of commotion in the home, if you don't want her to have his number, tell her to quietly delete it and keep it out of her phone and head forever, (you know what am saying). i have this ex, that i dare not have his number on my phone, or else my husband would climb the roof top, that guys' name, makes my husband so insecured, despite all my yarnings say, '.i left that guy for him' blablabla!!!, but e no wan know oooo, so i don't call him, nor e-mail him, he is yours trully gone, and that is just to calm my hubby's nerve. Just tell her you don't want her to have anything to do with him, lets see if that will calm you down.

zayhal:

^^^

Perhaps poster has realised that his wife is innocent that's why we no longer hear from him.

thank you.

I have an almost similar problem,my wife still maintains contact with her ex,they talk regularly and im beginning to suspect they might plan to meet someday ,she doesnt it though,i have her email n facebook passwords.the moment anything untoward happens,she's out.i monitor her communications everyday cos i know the person i have.

@ poster pls divorce her and marry me