Emergency! I Need Recipes

oya oh. my dear NL chics (if any one of you has got time), i've been eating lots of crap recently. now i need recipes

yes, i can't cook. i'm disastrous in the kitchen but desperate times call for desperate y'know .... so how can i cook:
1. stew?
2. spaghetti?
3. beans
3. chicken?

ps: i don't eat boiled meat.

regards,
a desperate c0dec

Go and get a girlfriend who is a good cook! Simple!

rub it in. i don't have time for a girl now. besides the good cooks are already taken

you don't eat boiled meat?do you eat fried meat?if your answer is none at all,I would recommend fish!!well,let me give you the recipe for stew

Ingredients
4 fresh tomatoes
2tins of tomatoe paste
I bulb of onion
4 bells of pepper
3 maggi cubes
I tbsp of curry
I little cup of vegetable oil
I fresh fish
Salt to taste

How to prepare

wash fish with running water and cut into desired fillets
put into saucepan
put in some of the ground fresh pepper
a little onions
1 cube of maggi
put on the fire to boil for some minutes,
by then,the broth must have been visible in the fish
now the stew proper...
Put the oil in another saucepan
allow to heat for sometime
add fresh tomatoes
allow to fry for at least 10mins to remove the tangy taste
add onions
add pepper
maggi cubes
then add the tomatoe paste
cover with lid for at least 10mins then pour in the fish with the broth
allow to boil for 5 more minutes

allow to simmer,then serve with rice,dodo or anything you prefer....


are you satisfied?

thanx a lot snazz. u single?
but err ... pity i don't eat fish (in any form) at all. my bad . but oh yes i eat anything fried (but fish). thanx anyways.

i'm guessing the other NL chics can't cook.
prove me wrong.

well,since you dont eat fish,use the same recipe for the meat or whatever you are using,but this time,use the meat broth,and fry the meat in vegetable oil or olive oil.

WARNING!!!
don't turn the meat after every 2 seconds,for the golden brown color,turn it after five minutes and don't be scared of oil spurting on you,its normal!!!!
Got to split..
byeee!!!

thanx a bunch i owe u one.

c0dec:

i'm guessing the other NL chics can't cook.
prove me wrong.

You actually mean your sista can't cook?? no comment aight! u end up eatin all what i cook! uhh b/t/w snazzz thanks 4 helpin out my desperate brova ooopss  i didn't say nothin aight!!

Me i want to visit aunty snazzy oo. She's a good cook.

I can cook all these things, but telling u how to? I dunno. Maybe i'll try sha.

this girl and food!!!!if you come,I will overfeed you ooo!!!

oh boy, the title has gone explicit. hmm ... well i'm still waiting for more. other nigerian dishes are welcome also. thanx.

angel, try abeg. emm, chillin ... see ya head.

would you be willing to try baked chicken or marinaded chicken?

yes o - whatever that is. as long as it's not boiled chicken.

Eguisi soup

Ingredients
one-half cup palm oil, or peanut oil, or similar

one or two Maggi® cubes (optional)

two red onions, chopped

two or three tomatoes, chopped

one spoonful tomato paste

one cup dried prawns or dried shrimp, or dried/salted/smoked fish or stockfish

one to two cups ground egusi

one to two pounds spinach; washed and chopped -- or -- bitterleaf
salt, to taste

ground dried crawfish to taste

Directions
Heat the palm oil in a pan. Fry the meat until browned, but not done Transfer the meat to a deep pot or dutch oven, cover it with water, add maggi cube, salt and half the chopped onions. Bring to a boil, then reduce heat and simmer.

Heat more palm oil in the same pan in which meat was browned; fry together the remaining onion, pepper, tomatoes. Once they start to become tender add the tomato paste, dried shrimp or fish, and egusi. Stir well for about 3 minutes.

Add the onion-tomato-egusi mixture to the simmering meat and stir into a smooth soup. Cook for twenty to thirty minutes, or until meat is done.

Stir in chopped greens. Add in crayfish to taste. Simmer for a few minutes more. Serve with garri, fufu, or pounded yam.
Have fun dude 

Sup Codec,
   Well, getting a girlfriend does not guarantee your problems is over as in cooking except you meet one specifically that can cook. u grab.

How to make Fish Stew the simple Nigerian way so that since you don't eat beef, you can eat fish.

Fresh Fish Stew
Ingredients:

-454g fresh fish( croacker or titus or catfish) depending on your choice
-4 - 6 peppers
2-3 tatashe
-1 small onion
-2 large tomatoes
-1 or 2 maggi cube depending on the quantity
  Just a pinch of Curry , thyme and you could add garlic too add taste too
-1 cooking spoon palm oil or vegetable oil depending on your choice
-2 cups of water or 3 cups depending on the quantity you are making
Directions:

1) First of all, get a pot and steam your fish for about 2-5 minutes.
2) After steaming your fish, then you can either fry it with vegetable oil or leave it like that if you want it the boiled way.
3)Why frying your fish, if you don't want your fish to break, use flour ok when frying the fish as in to prevent it from splitting to pieces.
4) Get a blender or a mortal, blend your onions, pepper, tomatoe and tatashe together
5) Get a pot
6) Add some vegetable oil (2-3 spoons of oil)
7) Leave to fry for about 5 minutes
Add your blended tomatoe paste and stirr, leave to boil for about 10 minutes
9) Add some water if its too thick
10) Add some salt to taste
11) Add your spices, curry , maggi, thyme and garlic if u love garlic
12) stirr well and leave to boil
13) Put in your steamed fish or your fried fish and leave to boil for about 10 minutes .
14) You would begin to notice that the stew would start to have the fish taste , add salt if needed, stirr well, add more water if too thick and just leave to boil for about 6-10 minutes more
NB: In no time, your fish stew is ready, serve with boiled rice, yam or potatoe. Enjoy, bonafetti. 

Here is the recipe for isiewu.
Isiewu is a delicacy enjoyed among the igbos.
Ingredients
Goat head(well cut up into pieces)
1 lil cup of palm oil
1 rock of limestone
5 fresh peppers
1 bulb of onions
4 cubes of maggi
a pinch of salt to taste
utazi leaves

boil the meat in a saucepan for 20 minutes making a thick broth
melt some of the limeston(akawa)in warm water till it is well disolved(in a deep bowl)
add the palm oil
stir till it is now very pasty(the colour will change from red to orange)
add the onions,pepper,maggi cubes,and the utazi leaves
stir till its well mixed
then add the meat with the thick broth
stir for sometime for proper mixing
serve
makes 4 servings!!!

watch out for recipes of Afang soup and other Efik soups!!! byeee.

thanx a lot scorpio, disney and snazz. keep it coming girls.

Alright, the marinaded chicken

It's easy. You season the chicken according to taste(as for me I like pepper)
Then marinade(dip, pour)the chicken with a Thousand Island Dressing cream or any Italian dressing(Marinera sauce)
It's better if you leave it on for the taste to enter(doesn't really matter)
Put in a pan, set in oven for 350o until cooked.

Afang soup

Ingredients

Waterleaf
Afang leaves
Fresh Pepper
Maggi cubes
Crayfish
Mfi(periwinkles)
Palm oil
Stockfish
Goat meat,beef or any required meat
Ibad(dry fish)
salt to taste

wash the waterleaves
cut them into little shreds
the afang is always sliced,so pound them in a mortar
season the meat using the pepper,onions and some of the maggi cubes
when the meat is tender,it will produce much broth
put the shredded waterleaf into the pot
allow to boil for 5 minutes
add the crayfish
allow to boil for 5 minutes
add salt to taste
add palm oil
allow to boil for 10mins
add the stockfish and the ibad(dryfish)and the already prepared mfi(periwinkles)
after 5 minutes,add the afang leaves
stir till its all well mixed

allow to simmer
serve with garri,foofoo,semovita...

very delicious...

actually,there are no hard and fast rules as to how to prepare all these foods.You develop your own style...

c0dec:

chillin ... see ya head.

uhmm i'll pretend i didn't see that aight!

Okkkayy! Here goes the recipe and ingredients for SPAPAGETTI !!(or i'll call it pasta) 

Since u don’t eat fish! Fish is eliminated!

STEP1!: Wash your hands!!

Ingredients:
· Spaghetti ----a hand full or a bunch… u know how u’v got broom in a bunch rite!  yeahh sumn like that
· A lil bit of Salt!

Directions:
· Put 2-3 cups of water to a boil
· Add your spaghetti(Break it into two..coz it very long), make sure you leave the pot-opened coz it boils and foams up.
· Add salt to taste. Make sure your don’t overcook it..if u end up realizing that you u’v got too much water in it, pour the spaghetti into a colander(sieve); letting it say for few mins until it getz drained!---- thatz pretty much it!


Ingredients for your sauce:
A  lil bit of Water
1spoon full or less of Canola oil
2-3 Tomatoes
2- Pepper (those huge ones)
1bulb of Onion
4-5 green onion (those kindaa look like a long green grass)
1 can teaspoon of tomato paste( thatz a 70g)
1-2 Maggi/seasoning
Parsley, Rosemary or thyme leaves (only if u like em’)
¾ or less Salt—make sure u taste n’ see


Direction to cooking the sauce!
· Slice your tomatoes, pepper, onion—make sure u don’t slice them soo little, so make sure itz kind of sliced in form of a strip
· Mash or break up your ground beef in a bowl-- Using ground beef (yeahh I know u eat that) NOTEE!! Make sure u don’t touch other surfaces after touching your beef!----so therefore, wash your hands occasionally
· Add a lil bit of oil in a fryin pan, heat it up a lil bit, and later add your tomatoes, pepper and onion. Heat up your magi a lil bit and add it in.
· Add a lil bit of salt to taste; add your seasoning (either Parsley, Rosemary or thyme leave)

Mehnnn this thing long ooooo!!

· Kk and now add a lil bit of oil in a fryin pan when itz heated, add in your mashed up  ground beef in and steam it a lil bit! Not fryin!!  Now your are pretty much there!
· Add all what u’v got in the first fryin pan into the fryin pan u’v gatt the beef in! Soo u mix e’m up together..n’ let it steam a lil bit!
· PS: taste to see if a lil more salt is needed
Now you are pretty much DONEEEE!!

Directions for eatin!:
Do you really need this?

Seun dearie we need our Nairaland kitchen fast ooo!!!the guys here are starved!!!

I agree 150%

and Seun,we need it fast,or rather,I need it fast ,else Nairaland will burn because cooking was done in the wrong palce.Haba....
give us the kitchen fast,after all,there is NL bedroomI(sexuality and romance)even parlour and playground dey,so please


ALL WE ARE SAYING,GIVE US A KITCHEN!!!

Ladies,I lie?

hahaha snazz!!

mhm.

wow. wildcat, chillin, snazz. nice one. the spaghetti and chicken were highly needed (but which one be afang soup?). i now have enough recipes. what's cool is that they are in the same place. this thread is now in my bookmarks.

and yeah Seun, give them their kitchen oh. if not for us hungry men, then for those chics wey no sabi e.g IAH and the young ones e.g nike4luv

I can copy and paste recipes for you. I even have a recipe book. I can write it here. It'll look as if im really good in cooking.. but *coughs*... na copy and paste oo. You want am?

I can cook 201 types of dishes. That's the amount in my book.

c0dec:

then for those chics wey no sabi e.g IAH and the young ones e.g nike4luv

Who tell you say I no sabi? You just want me to talk abi? You can refer to my previous post here.
https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-2885.0.html

If you need recipe, I repeat, get a good cook for a girlfriend or hire a cook!

@ c0dec, i can cook too but i just cant be bothered to type that long! so am not young when it comes to the kitchen o

heyy bro i'v gat more reciepies 4 you aight!!

This is called the Turkey Wrap with Tzatziki
Tzatziki could be a substitute for mayonaise or any condiment u like

Ingredients:
2 tbsp  Extra Thick Tzatziki or mayonaise(anyhow u like it)
2  Flax Tortillas, Whole wheat wrap or Pita
8 slices of Turkey Breast - Deli Sliced
1-2  plum tomato, sliced 
1 thinly sliced cucumbers
Less than 1 Onion, also sliced
Green pepper(only if u like it)

Directions:
-    Spread tzatziki/mayonaise over wraps, leaving ¹/₂-inch border all around edge.
-    Divide turkey, tomato, cucumber, green pepper and onion evenly between wraps, piling along lower third of wrap. Fold in side edges and roll like a cylinder.
-    Slice each roll in half.
You're pretty much done!!

Anty snazzydawn,where u dey for uyo?me i dey uyo too make i fit come your house come chop.i dey wait for your reply o