Dear Nlanders,
i would like to know if it is a must to have children when married?
Can't husband and wife find true happiness and fulfillment in their home/marriage without having children? i mean many FERTILE couples r deciding to be 'childfree', is this okay? what do u guys think?

megletters:

Dear Nlanders,
i would like to know if it is a must to have children when married?
Can't husband and wife find true happiness and fulfillment in their home/marriage without having children? i mean many FERTILE couples r deciding to be 'childfree', is this okay? pls, what do u guys think?

Ofcourse,its allowed and possible as long as Both parties are 100% comfortable with the arrangement.
I wud be giving it a try Constant action No bumps or 9mths go slow

.

@ chaircover
you r right, i mean if only there was technology to control all these 'uncontrolables'(Lord forgive my talk!)

In Nigerian culture, its not ok for married folks to remain childless.

Chaircover & Ifyalways,

I tend to agree with you on many of your responses on this section of the forum. You have said exactly what I had in mind with different choice of words. I thought no one was ever going to agree that it's OK under certain conditions. Nice.

^^^^ because you don't have a mind of your own.

You know I am sure you can find happiness in marriage without having kids. Being happy person comes form the inside but not from outside, so if you feel like you are not interested in having kids- just make sure you both agree on this before getting married. Wish you the best!

It's better to remain childfree than to bring children in the world to be abused and abandoned by both parents. Some people don't want the responsibilities of being a parent. I wouldn't choose such a path, because I think bringing children into the world under the blessing and sanctity of marriage must be the greatest feeling ever.

obowunmi:

^^^^ because you don't have a mind of your own.

@ obowunmi, Think about your statement for five minutes and ask yourself if it makes any sense
There is nothing wrong in appreciating the opinions of others and acknowledging that you agree with them. IMHO, Chaircover (for example) has made some of the most mature and objective contributions on family section. If I had agreed with your opinion, you probably would not have said the same thing. Make an effort to be objective next time.

BACK TO THE TOPIC!

The couple can agree not to have children. If the need arises to have one sometime later in life, they can always have one. However, they should plan ahead and decide what they would do if they cant have any at the time when they are ready. They could adopt a child or something. It all boils down to agreement and planning.

Personal choice.
Love is not based on numbers.
What is the quality of life?
QUALITY not QUANTITY.

@efisher, yes my statement makes sense.

Do you repeatedly agree with them because you don't have a mind and opinion of your own ?

Your notion about objectivity is quote. As humans, we are all biased due to one reason or the other. Stop spewing jargon about objectivity--- only illiterates do that.

^^^^ Please leave me alone and face the topic. I don't know what your motive is and I am not interested. For your information, I am male, I am married and I am not interested in making new enemies. Stop derailing this thread.

Note: I WILL SIMPLY IGNORE YOU FROM NOW ON!!!

Ure not male. You sound like a wimp.

megletters:

Dear Nlanders,
i would like to know if it is a must to have children when married?
Can't husband and wife find true happiness and fulfillment in their home/marriage without having children? i mean many FERTILE couples r deciding to be 'childfree', is this okay? what do u guys think?

first you should ask yourself when you say IS IT OK  to who's point of view should it be OK the onlookers or the couple ?

its not OK as OK is the WRONG WORD  it is their RIGHT TO DECIDE WHAT THEY WANT TO DO WITH THEIR LIFE i.e NOT HAVING KIDS

the rest eg family, friends, church etc are not welcome to give advice on such decisions  at the end of the day they contribute nothing to the actual raising of the kids

ZIM DRILL:

first you should ask yourself when you say IS IT OK  to who's point of view should it be OK the onlookers or the couple ?

its not OK as OK is the WRONG WORD  it is their RIGHT TO DECIDE WHAT THEY WANT TO DO WITH THEIR LIFE i.e NOT HAVING KIDS

the rest eg family, friends, church etc are not welcome to give advice on such decisions  at the end of the day they contribute nothing to the actual raising of the kids

Very well said.

Its easy to get caught up in the web of expectations from family members, Churches and the society at large, very easy. Ultimately this decision lies with the couple and whatever they decide upon should be respected by all.

Blazay: Personal choice.
Love is not based on numbers.
What is the quality of life?
QUALITY not QUANTITY.

EVER SOOOOOOOOOOOOO CONSISTENT!!!!
Hmmmmmmmm. . . . .AMEN. . . CHIEF BLAZZZZAY!!! I YAMMY 'PRAYING FOR YOU'!

MU CHA CHA CHA CHA CHA CHA CHA

LWKMD!!! TO TEARS!!!

@op,If it is based on d agreement of both of you, then, its ok, but one party should not be forced into it by d other party. Its even better than having children and not caring and training them.
May God help us all.