Ndipe:

Ok, here is my input, if tradition says that a woman is wedding a man hence her name should come first (when in actuality, it's the man that weds the woman), I'd have to ask, why cant we put an end to such traditions? it's the man that is wedding the woman and not the other way round. Hence, his name comes first. I dont care if the norm of adding the woman's name first on the IV card has been around for donkey years, the right thing is for the man's name to come first. Haba, who is wedding who? Is it not the man? Is it not the father of the bride who is GIVING her away to the man? Lets apply common sense and forego tradition!

How does that translate to the man wedding the woman?  

LOL NA WA OO. I thought couples wed each other, what's all this about the man wedding the woman? And the woman is doing what?  . . . . ?!

@OP, Congrats! Like others have said, it's a petty situation but I'll be a bit concerned about his stance on the issue. Did he actually say his way or no wedding?   Most men don't even wanna be involved in stuff like cards and mostly leave such to the woman, from what I've heard . It's good you two are working together though but the stubbornness doesn't look too good. Anyway, Good luck!

I wonder why some men worry about such trivial things . . . name on IV??


na that one your family go chop??  better go find money

Someone told me that a woman weds a man and a man marries a woman.

But then I need someone to tell me the difference between wed and marry

OAM4J:

Someone told me that a woman weds a man and a man marries a woman.

But then I need someone to tell me the difference between wed and marry

You marry a beautiful woman and you wed an ugly one.

^but am yet to see a groom crying on his wedding day

Here you go. . .

^ Goodness, u try o

denzel2009:

Here you go. . .

@denzel

d groom dey shed tears of joy (pali) not crying

denzel2009:

Here you go. . .

www.nairaland.com/attachments/435687_356657_haba_jpgc72d3cc4854974cbf8eb471a1a0fa75c_jpga5958cc1bf725cb92153f410430cf484



hahahahahahahahahaha   OMG!

That looks like tears of joy to me sha. The man don old and one babe finally agree to marry am and on top give am pali, why him no go cry for joy  

I think this is something you guys need to fix cos we can tell you the same thing you already know but your man might not be satisfy with that. So u guys need to reach a mutual agreement on how the name should be arranged.

OAM4J:

www.nairaland.com/attachments/435687_356657_haba_jpgc72d3cc4854974cbf8eb471a1a0fa75c_jpga5958cc1bf725cb92153f410430cf484



hahahahahahahahahaha   OMG!

That looks like tears of joy to me sha. The man don old and one babe finally agree to marry am and on top give am pali, why him no go cry for joy  

^^^

I think he couldnt believe his luck.

Marrying a white girl that seems hot, at least from the picture, not one of those White trash you see Black men salivating over.

He just couldnt believe it I guess.

When you a marry White woman, any one, it is like passport to money, fame and peace of mind.

zstranger:

^^^

I think he couldnt believe his luck.

Marrying a white girl that seem hot, at least from the picture, not one of those White trash you see Black men salivating over.

He just couldnt believe it I guess.

When you a marry a White woman, any one, it is like passport to money, fame and peace of mind.

Hey! stranger, am uncomfortable with these your extra kind words for white girls o. You wife must be Oodua tokantokan or at least a naija babe _{( not NL naijababe o, that one is taken  )}

The man is overjoyed he's marrying a white woman. Please let him be. Btw i doubt he's nigerian- on the unlikely chance he is, definitely not from my area but people from his LGA (wherever that is) know themselves i'm sure.

He looks like some other african country but he might possibly be nigerian perhaps?

The nigerian men are quite westernized and more in touch with their feminie side these days.
Lucky woman- hope my man cries like that at my wedding but for where. Aint gonna happen. To even get a man sef is a big problem.

Ify,

I think you should let your husband to be have his way. there is no hard and fast rule about this but honestly the name of the man usually come first if you looked at the way wedding was done way back in the 60s, 70s and late 80s. these things change but some men see if from the spiritual point of view. for those talking about Oyinbo system, we all know how much right/privilege given to the womenfolk and it is sharp contrast with what we do here in Africa. When there is seperation or divorce the man takes a walk from the house leaving the kids behind and only applies to visit them while paying alimony monthly for their upkeep. it works for them there but i strongly dont think you should let this bother you. find out his reasons for saying so and believe me, my wife and i from the start agreed that my name as the man should come first. the foundation matters. i have also heard pastor tunde bakare telling his members that he will not officiate any wedding in his church where the lady weds the man. who knows, your fiance maybe of that school. Even some people believe that it is the man that must name the baby. these are viewed from spiritual angle while some roles are reserved for women. so i think you should go ahead with your wedding with his name that way. no one would bother about it. it is your day and you called people to come share your joy and witness. they are only witnesses and not judges.

Its usually the ladies name that comes first.
Since the wedding is an imported culture many folks do not seem to know why it is so.
The reason is that usually it is the bride's family that organizes the wedding ceremony as a way of sending forth there daughter from the home she had been to a new home. From where we imported this culture more often than not the brides family picks the cost of the ceremony. I want to add a caveampt that my opinion is debatable, and I do not claim to be an authority on the subject matter!

tpia@:

The man is overjoyed he's marrying a white woman.  Please let him be. Btw i doubt he's nigerian- on the unlikely chance he is, definitely not from my area but people from his LGA (wherever that is) know themselves i'm sure.

Exactly what I expected. ROFLMAO

The nigerian men are quite westernized and more in touch with their feminie side these days.
Lucky woman- hope my man cries like that at my wedding but for where. Aint gonna happen. To even get a man sef is a big problem.

You are still thinking of getting married at your age?

Hmmm,  well, goodluck.

IT IS THE WOMAN THAT MARRIES TH MAN.
1.Why do you go to the womans house for the traditional marriage?
its customary so dont please argue or ruin your marriage because you could be advertising your ignorance.thank you

tpia@:

The man is overjoyed he's marrying a white woman. Please let him be. Btw i doubt he's nigerian- on the unlikely chance he is, definitely not from my area but people from his LGA (wherever that is) know themselves i'm sure.

He looks like some other african country but he might possibly be nigerian perhaps?

The nigerian men are quite westernized and more in touch with their feminie side these days.
Lucky woman- hope my man cries like that at my wedding but for where. Aint gonna happen. To even get a man sef is a big problem.

You and this your Agbeni-ogunpa profiling, the guy is from Ibadan.

^No he's not.

I'd say congo.
Please drop the matter.

tpia@:

^No he's not.

I'd say congo.
Please drop the matter.

Lol, I saw this pic on NL posted by mr cork. Coincidentally, he was my senior in secondary school.

^Big lie.

The picture was first posted by an latvian lady who said she was dating a nigerian.

Why she posted the photo i dont knowz- maybe to convince nlers of something?

On the offchance that's your wedding photo, then it should remain in your family album instead of the internet dont you think.

All these congolese.

^^^

He is from Ibadan. He is a family friend.

Dunno what Tpia is gonna do with this info.   .     .  perhaps commit suicide?

Liars!!!!!

here we go again

tpia@:

^Big lie.

The picture was first posted by an latvian lady who said she was dating a nigerian.

Why she posted the photo i dont knowz- maybe to convince nlers of something?

On the offchance that's your wedding photo, then it should remain in your family album instead of the internet dont you think.

All these congolese.

Why do you just like wahala. Congoloese ko konjilese ni.

^I met the guy when i was in congo.

So, i know him, unlike you liars.

tpia@:

^I met the guy when he was shining my congo.

So, i know him, unlike you liars.

ewwww

@op, dont you think posting this on nairaland will cause another round of argument between you and your fiance, I mean, the name thing was suppose to be between you guys, and you rush to nairaland to seek advice. if I was in his shoe I wont find it funny o!
what happen when you guy dissagree on how often you make love after the wedding, will you still come to nairaland to seek advice? careful my dear, marriage is much more than wearing gown and exchanging rings.

Irrepective of whose name comes first,i think d most importnt thing is for d man to carry his new asset home at d end of d weddng and live happily ever after.congrats.

@ poster am glad dis topic is out now cos i wanted to talk abt it myself.
My friend in Ghana prompted my view why in Nigeria women marry men i was shocked to hear dat so i asked her why she said dat, den she said in d weddin invitation card d lady's name come first.

I was shock because i taught before now, that was the norm every where  in d world
so i quickly decided to do a quick research and to ma greatest surprise d reverse was d case in other places outside nigeria.

D case of d invitation for d royal wedding btw prince williams and kate as already posted wil be brought to bear (this is not a matter of colonial mentality).i saw other invitation card outside nigeria wit d man's name coming 1st.

So ma conclusion is ur husband to be is right. Unless u have a reason to prove y d lady's name shld come first. I personally like pple like ur husband to be who like to change societal norm dat has come to be without justification.