jennykadry:

Well since you are not a Nigerian, I will cut you some slacks.

Truth is we women have got bigger ''forgiving hearts" hearts than men. So we can easily forgive men that cheat and move on especially if kids are involved.

I repeat do not tell your pastor and do not tell your husband. Go to God and ask for forgiveness, he only can forgive you and give you the strength to move on.

Men work and walk with EGO and Pride and when infidelity on the woman sets in both pride and Ego have been wounded badly and the only thing they think about is '' someone else beat me to it'' , ''I'm I a loser?'' ''I have failed my self'' and nothing you do will quickly erase those thoughts off their mind.

Truth is, look for any virginity thread on this forum, men flood there like bees complimenting the virgins, Alot of Nigerian men in westernized countries go back home to ''marry'' a wife because they think the women with them there have been tested by their fellow men and have become tokunbohs(second hand) so they'd rather go back home and marry a ''fresh woman'' (who by the way acts all good and when she's done studying Nursing, dumps his sorry behind but that is a story for another day). Men think virginity makes one a good wife, No it doesn't, It is only an added plus in marriage. You married a man who would give his leg to be the first man in your life, this man would not have even married you if he knew you were dating and sleeping with someone else during your courtship, talkless of adultery IN MARRIAGE


If you are not going to tell your man about it believe me you have got a harder work to do to make that marriage work and that is the truth. You have to make him feel like the ''One out of a million man you once fell in love with. Do not for any reason remind him of his affair with that woman. You have to make him believe you have forgiven and forgotten, Get romantic and treat him like a baby; love him like you have never loved him, send him txt messages at work,  you both go for a vacation,  tell him you have forgiven him and tell your husband you need him back in your life.

Please break up with that  Mr perfect D[i]i[/i]ck you are dating and work on your marriage. If your husband is someone that rubs his affairs in his wife's face or calls you names and physically abuses you, I would have told you to go ahead and tell him about the affair but if he is this calm dude that wants to make his marriage work please get into that van and get his feelings for you back.

Do you want your marriage to work? then keep shut and get working. Tell him and you will lose your marriage and your life^
^^^^^^^
This is the advice to take to make your marriage work,if you want to manipulate your husband. MANIPULATE!!What does this have to do with love?!

apocalypse:

Don't know why people are sugar coating their replies , you are a who.re and it's clear to see. Your heart is far from this man so let him be , it's also clear that he still loves yot but you don't.
I don't think your husband was complaining about the number of men you had slept with before you guys met but while you were both dating. You don't want to come out clean but I know your infidelity/promiscuity issue didn't start today. Ashewo odoko oshi

jennykadry:

Well since you are not a Nigerian, I will cut you some slacks.

Truth is we women have got bigger ''forgiving hearts" hearts than men. So we can easily forgive men that cheat and move on especially if kids are involved.

I repeat do not tell your pastor and do not tell your husband. Go to God and ask for forgiveness, he only can forgive you and give you the strength to move on.

Men work and walk with EGO and Pride and when infidelity on the woman sets in both pride and Ego have been wounded badly and the only thing they think about is '' someone else beat me to it'' , ''I'm I a loser?'' ''I have failed my self'' and nothing you do will quickly erase those thoughts off their mind.

Truth is, look for any virginity thread on this forum, men flood there like bees complimenting the virgins, Alot of Nigerian men in westernized countries go back home to ''marry'' a wife because they think the women with them there have been tested by their fellow men and have become tokunbohs(second hand) so they'd rather go back home and marry a ''fresh woman'' (who by the way acts all good and when she's done studying Nursing, dumps his sorry behind but that is a story for another day). Men think virginity makes one a good wife, No it doesn't, It is only an added plus in marriage. You married a man who would give his leg to be the first man in your life, this man would not have even married you if he knew you were dating and sleeping with someone else during your courtship, talkless of adultery IN MARRIAGE


If you are not going to tell your man about it believe me you have got a harder work to do to make that marriage work and that is the truth. You have to make him feel like the ''One out of a million man you once fell in love with. Do not for any reason remind him of his affair with that woman. You have to make him believe you have forgiven and forgotten, Get romantic and treat him like a baby; love him like you have never loved him, send him txt messages at work, you both go for a vacation, tell him you have forgiven him and tell your husband you need him back in your life.

Please break up with that Mr perfect D[i]i[/i]ck you are dating and work on your marriage. If your husband is someone that rubs his affairs in his wife's face or calls you names and physically abuses you, I would have told you to go ahead and tell him about the affair but if he is this calm dude that wants to make his marriage work please get into that van and get his feelings for you back.

Do you want your marriage to work? then keep shut and get working. Tell him and you will lose your marriage and your life.

~Minx~:

Thanks for all your responses. I have made a decision NOT to confess but I have stopped seeing the other guy (though I can't get our sexual encounters out of my head). I am going to try and make this work and give it my all with my husband and just hope for the best. I am also seeking God's hand in this one as it is a spiritual warfare

~Minx~:

Thanks for all your responses. I have made a decision NOT to confess but I have stopped seeing the other guy (though I can't get our sexual encounters out of my head). I am going to try and make this work and give it my all with my husband and just hope for the best. I am also seeking God's hand in this one as it is a spiritual warfare

Someone asked if my husband knows the other guy, the answer is no and we don't have any mutual friends.

toyemz:

@sleekman

sir you are rambling
The Bible says he who is sinless,let him cast the first stone and gradually the crowd faded away
Unfortunately sir,this is the times of our age,that where marriages should be held sacred,infidelity and what have you tend to sneak in
can you imagine if everyone who committed a blunder in marriage were put to death,how much of the world populace would be left,especially within the male gender?
so don't cast stones sir,don't judge  her and don't cast her
If it is the will of God that her marriage will stand there is nothing you can do about it
work with her on how to put things right
don't castigate her and don't crucify her
thank you

~Minx~:

Thanks for all your responses. I have made a decision NOT to confess but I have stopped seeing the other guy (though I can't get our sexual encounters out of my head). I am going to try and make this work and give it my all with my husband and just hope for the best. I am also seeking God's hand in this one as it is a spiritual warfare

Someone asked if my husband knows the other guy, the answer is no and we don't have any mutual friends.

There is way too much holier than thou going on in this topic.

I really think you are being unrealistic Monkeyleg all this truth truth truth.

I really dont think the best solution is to go about blabbing without thinking.  She knows her husband best and she knows the situation she is in. 

Its ok for a man to have an affair it doesnt destroy them or their families infact if a woman makes too much noise they will tell her to sit down and shut up.

Now if a woman has an affair God save her she will be disgraced sent packing and have her life made hell.

Even if she tells him, now is not the right time she should solve the issues they have now before saying "oh by the way I have been haing mindblowing sex for months"

spikedcylinder:

A lot of hypocritical dweebs on this site sef. I wonder what the responses would have been if this story was told from a man's point of view.

Awon alakori.

karpenter:

This marriage is over and done with. On the face of presented facts, there's absolute nothing that could make you resist your adulterous partner if a conducive situation pops up. This is called “Okafor’s” theory – “a hole once profitably drilled can always be drilled again”. [i][/i]You are now everlastingly under the spell of the self described “wonderful sexual experience”. This, you certainly did not obtain from your husband. I then wonder how you’ll ever work things out with your husband as being suggested by some of these unrealistic commentators.

Don’t get mislead, you can’t survive the rest of your married life with unexciting sexual life, especially when you’ve tasted something better elsewhere. It’s a joke.

karpenter:

This marriage is over and done with. On the face of presented facts, there's absolute nothing that could make you resist your adulterous partner if a conducive situation pops up. This is called “Okafor’s” theory – “a hole once profitably drilled can always be drilled again”. [i][/i]You are now everlastingly under the spell of the self described “wonderful sexual experience”. This, you certainly did not obtain from your husband. I then wonder how you’ll ever work things out with your husband as being suggested by some of these unrealistic commentators.

Don’t get mislead, you can’t survive the rest of your married life with unexciting sexual life, especially when you’ve tasted something better elsewhere. It’s a joke.

monkeyleg:

You make a very big point. We still do not why she strayed. potentially sex with her husbadn may never be the same again, can you imagine what would be going through her head.