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My Husband Is So Annoying. I'm Depress. - Family - Nairaland

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My Husband Is So Annoying. I'm Depress. by Nobody: 4:37pm On Mar 17, 2023
The truth is right now, I feel like going somewhere for a while. I feel like I need rest. Somewhere I can forget about all my problems and breathe a fresh air.
My husband has not been honest with me since the beginning of this marriage and I doubt if this is an attitude of a man that loves

He has always been in debt even before I married him. and he wouldn't let me know what he do with the money he keeps borrowing from people. Even my friends I introduced to him, he is owning them and can't pay back.

The bad side is, he borrows and stop picking their calls not respond nicely to them.
He behalves badly to them.
I'm suspecting he's into some kind of addiction that demands money. Maybe gambling but he wouldn't tell me.
He's constantly on his phone.

He is owning loan app everywhere. To the extent that the app had to send hurrible messages to his contact's lists including his bosses, office colleagues and my relatives.
It's so embarrassing and tiring.
He has apologized several times that I should give him time to work on himself to stop an addiction, but he refused to explain what it is. Claiming that I might leave him if I know.
But he has not changed abit.
We are always hungry in this house. No baby food for my 6months old baby, no pampers and everything is total struggle. I quit my job last year but I'll soon start job search once my baby grow a little.
In this house, If I don't look for food, then, we starve, I don't look for means of getting pampers, food, wears,then my baby will suffer, because his daddy is not capable of providing anything for us. It's so annoying.

I have dreams before I married him, but right now, I feel lost. There's no romance, no love, no affection in this marriage anymore, as I wouldn't even let him touch me because of the stress, suffer he constantly brings on us.

Money I raised to start up a business, (340k) I ended up using it to pay for his debt last two months because the people were always coming to embarrass us in the house and neighbors were coming to pleade on our behalf. I had to clear up the loan, yet he couldn't explain what he did with the money.
With that start up capital, I would have been growing by now, but here I am. Still at the zero point.

I'm really tired
I'm so confused here.
What should I do?
What would you advise?

121 Likes 9 Shares

Re: My Husband Is So Annoying. I'm Depress. by DearGorgeous(f): 4:38pm On Mar 17, 2023
Ok. It's such a pity. Does he have a close friend that visits once in a while? Try to see if you can get answers to your questions through him.
Whatever answer you get, will inform your decision.

144 Likes 6 Shares

Re: My Husband Is So Annoying. I'm Depress. by Cutehector(m): 4:45pm On Mar 17, 2023
Its never going to stop. Even if you clear all his debts, he'll still dm another person to ask for urgent 2k because he has formed that habit.

Well, i cant tell you what to do, figure it out yourself.

188 Likes 9 Shares

Re: My Husband Is So Annoying. I'm Depress. by Kobojunkie: 4:51pm On Mar 17, 2023
Dearlove2me:
ā–  I have dreams before I married him, but right now, I feel lost. There's no romance, no love, no affection in this marriage anymore, as I wouldn't even let him touch me because of the stress, suffer he constantly brings on us.
Money I raised to start up a business, (340k) I ended up using it to pay for his debt last two months because the people were always coming to embarrass us in the house and neighbors were coming to pleade on our behalf. I had to clear up the loan, yet he couldn't explain what he did with the money. With that start up capital, I would have been growing by now, but here I am. Still at the zero point. I'm really tired I'm so confused here. What should I do?What would you advise?
1. Marriage no be by force abeg! undecided

93 Likes 8 Shares

Re: My Husband Is So Annoying. I'm Depress. by Autobot05: 4:51pm On Mar 17, 2023
You didn't see any of these before you married him ?

105 Likes 10 Shares

Re: My Husband Is So Annoying. I'm Depress. by EmekaBlue(m): 4:52pm On Mar 17, 2023
Always on his phone rings a bell grin

Check with style from afar if it's Green page or Red page

Bet9ja vs Sportybet.

Don't think too much! You will be fine someway,somehow, someday

Ogadimma! Life is hard

324 Likes 19 Shares

Re: My Husband Is So Annoying. I'm Depress. by gaby(m): 4:55pm On Mar 17, 2023
The signs were always there but you simply chose to ignore or rebuke them.

You do not need to be a rocket scientist to smell a person with zero potential to save yourself from any form of entanglement like this one.

83 Likes 7 Shares

Re: My Husband Is So Annoying. I'm Depress. by Romanoff(f): 4:56pm On Mar 17, 2023
You need to be sane for your kids and for that marriage if you want it to work.

The thing with men like your husband is, if they haven't reached rock bottom, they'll never change.

You can either separate from him so you can have a clear head to better your life and that of your kids while he gets his life together.

71 Likes 8 Shares

Re: My Husband Is So Annoying. I'm Depress. by Nobody: 4:56pm On Mar 17, 2023
Cutehector:
Its never going to stop. Even if you clear all his debts, he'll still dm another person to ask for urgent 2k because he has formed that habit.

Well, i cant tell you what to do, figure it out yourself.
I have vow never to interfere in all his debt again. After all he's an adult

18 Likes 2 Shares

Re: My Husband Is So Annoying. I'm Depress. by Nobody: 4:57pm On Mar 17, 2023
Kobojunkie:
1. Marriage no be by force abeg! undecided
My thought right now.

5 Likes

Re: My Husband Is So Annoying. I'm Depress. by Nobody: 4:59pm On Mar 17, 2023
Romanoff:
You need to be sane for your kids and for that marriage if you want it to work.

The thing with men like your husband is, if they haven't reached rock bottom, they'll never change.

You can either separate from him so you can have a clear head to better your life and that of your kids while he gets his life together.

Alright. I'm thinking maybe going to spend some time in my family house but I'm thinking of going with all my things

23 Likes

Re: My Husband Is So Annoying. I'm Depress. by Autobot05: 5:01pm On Mar 17, 2023
sofeo:



The signs were there actually, she probably didn't notice or was so in love.


I'm sorry o ... but I don't pity such people
He's either a drug addict or a gambler

They are the ones with such money behavior

47 Likes 2 Shares

Re: My Husband Is So Annoying. I'm Depress. by Nobody: 5:01pm On Mar 17, 2023
sofeo:



The signs were there actually, she probably didn't notice or was so in love.

My husband is very quite. He was always complaining, he had no money, office was not treating them well, salary is too small, but I didn't know the extent of his broke life.

24 Likes 2 Shares

Re: My Husband Is So Annoying. I'm Depress. by Romanoff(f): 5:01pm On Mar 17, 2023
Dearlove2me:
Alright. I'm thinking maybe going to spend some time in my family house but I'm thinking of going with all my things

You don't have to go with all your things and before you leave, call a family meeting with him present so you can explain to both sides why you're separating from him and what he needs to do for you to come back.

Don't just leave like that, let your families be aware.

147 Likes 11 Shares

Re: My Husband Is So Annoying. I'm Depress. by Scarfin(m): 5:05pm On Mar 17, 2023
This painful story. Is it true?
Can he just open up because God brought you into his life to help you.
It could be sex addiction.
It looks like sex addiction.
You're a strong soul. But you can take back this man if and only if you can overweigh his pride, shame and fear.
He's scared and the FEAR imprisons him in the form of a spirit.
He loves you but first, find a way of getting him to open up.
Finally and more importantly, he needs God more than anything.
Addiction is very cruel and dangerous.
The victim defends it with his/her life until someone or something sets him/her free.

31 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Husband Is So Annoying. I'm Depress. by Nobody: 5:05pm On Mar 17, 2023
Romanoff:


You don't have to go with all your things and before you leave, call a family meeting with him present so you can explain to both sides why you're separating from him and what he needs to do for you to come back.

Don't just leave like that, let your families be aware.
But his families are in the village, I can do that with calls right?

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Husband Is So Annoying. I'm Depress. by IamANigerianMan: 5:06pm On Mar 17, 2023
Dearlove2me:

He has always been in debt even before I married him.

Madam I feel your pain, the worst thing that can happen to a man or woman is to married and regret, when you discovered this before marriage why did you go ahead? Human being cannot change except God decided to change him or her... My advice for you is to keep praying to God who can change human to change your husband Prov. 21:1

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Re: My Husband Is So Annoying. I'm Depress. by Romanoff(f): 5:07pm On Mar 17, 2023
Dearlove2me:
But his families are in the village, I can do that with calls right?

I guess that will work. But would have been better if it's a physical meeting.

Note that the period of separation is for you to better yourself and the life of your kids so your husband can sort out his issues, it is not a time to be unfaithful to your husband.

My hand no dey for that one o.

44 Likes 3 Shares

Re: My Husband Is So Annoying. I'm Depress. by Rechargeam247(f): 5:08pm On Mar 17, 2023
Kai, why am I seeing Simi's lyrics on this thread, women are trying, make I no talk. Stop enabling him by being the one to clear debts you know nothing about. I can imagine the embarrassments you have been facing. Well, you should probably separate for a while, let him sort himself out.

The thing with addiction is the people in it have to be extra determined and make efforts to come out of it themselves if not your efforts will be futile.

Stories like this just makes me wonder how unkind, people can be to their partners šŸ˜¢ very unfair to drag the other half down with you with your bad habits, God abeg, not everyone should be married.

25 Likes 3 Shares

Re: My Husband Is So Annoying. I'm Depress. by Steve0979(m): 5:08pm On Mar 17, 2023
Na either sporty or naija aswear na one e go b.just last I burn 45k my allowance army pay m and today now I dey beg for 5k

42 Likes 4 Shares

Re: My Husband Is So Annoying. I'm Depress. by Nobody: 5:08pm On Mar 17, 2023
Scarfin:
This painful story. Is it true?
Can he just open up because God brought you into his life to help you.
It could be sex addiction.
It looks like sex addiction.
You're a strong soul. But you can take back this man if and only if you can overweigh his pride, shame and fear.
He's scared and the FEAR imprisons him in the form of a spirit.
He loves you but first, find a way of getting him to open up.
Finally and more importantly, he needs God more than anything.
Addiction is very cruel and dangerous.
The victim defends it with his/her life until someone or something sets him/her free.
If you love someone, you don't inflict pain on them. You make yourself a better person for the one you love. He don't love me nor our baby. He put so much stress on us and you can it love? I'm tired. I'm not strong.

7 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Husband Is So Annoying. I'm Depress. by Kobojunkie: 5:09pm On Mar 17, 2023
Dearlove2me:
Alright. I'm thinking maybe going to spend some time in my family house but I'm thinking of going with all my things
Please do! You have paid off his debt so take it that you are free to go back to your family and restart your life apart from him. If and when he decides to get his act together, let him contact you then and you two decide if the marriage is still worth it at that point. undecided

20 Likes

Re: My Husband Is So Annoying. I'm Depress. by Nobody: 5:11pm On Mar 17, 2023
IamANigerianMan:

Madam I feel your pain, the worst thing that can happen to a man or woman is to married and regret, when you discovered this before marriage why did you go ahead? Human being cannot change except God decided to change him or her... My advice for you is to keep praying to God who can change human to change your husband Prov. 21:1
I didn't know before marriage. I knew about past debt from his messages. That's how I knew he has always been in debt

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Husband Is So Annoying. I'm Depress. by Nazgul: 5:14pm On Mar 17, 2023
This is why I'm always of the opinion that you know your spouse personally before agreeing to marry him/her. Don't be blinded by love cos marriage is a lifetime agreement. And if you choose wrongly, you'd have to live with with your choice for the rest of your life.

To your case...the best advice I'll give you for the sake of your mental health is to take a break from that marriage. Move out of that house and put yourself together. That man is a gambler and as long as you remain in that house with him, you wouldn't achieve anything for yourself cos his lifestyle would keep pulling you backwards. He would borrow and even steal from you to gamble.

Some people might advice you to endure and keep praying for him, the fact here is that you don't endure anything or anyone whose attitude affects your mental health cos you can easily slide into depression or worse. You'll loose your job, become dead broke, you won't even have money to buy clothes and the man you're enduring all these for might just go out there and impregnate one girl, thereby compounding your woes.

Leave temporarily and build yourself, you said you want to look for another job, that's great start the job hunt, get the job and build yourself. When he's ready to change and become responsible, he'll come for you.

38 Likes 4 Shares

Re: My Husband Is So Annoying. I'm Depress. by Cutehector(m): 5:16pm On Mar 17, 2023
Dearlove2me:
I have vow never to interfere in all his debt again. After all he's an adult
good.
Re: My Husband Is So Annoying. I'm Depress. by Kobojunkie: 5:16pm On Mar 17, 2023
IamANigerianMan:
ā–  Madam I feel your pain, the worst thing that can happen to a man or woman is to married and regret, when you discovered this before marriage why did you go ahead? Human being cannot change except God decided to change him or her... My advice for you is to keep praying to God who can change human to change your husband Prov. 21:1
1. Praying to which God? The God that informed you from almost 2000 years ago that your marriages are of this world and not of the Kingdom of God? The God that allowed you to seek divorce in marriage and also remarriage in the case of fornication? Please stop telling these lies using God's name abeg! undecided

Jesus Christ does not change another human being for the sake or on the behalf of another human being. So stop perpetrating these lies to your fellow men using God's name. undecided

11 Likes 4 Shares

Re: My Husband Is So Annoying. I'm Depress. by Kobojunkie: 5:17pm On Mar 17, 2023
Dearlove2me:
I didn't know before marriage. I knew about past debt from his messages. That's how I knew he has always been in debt
No matter what you do,do not become one of those sad mentally sick women who spend their days praying for their broken marriages and adulterous husbands to change. God does not answer such prayers abeg so, please don't ever become one of those. undecided

16 Likes 4 Shares

Re: My Husband Is So Annoying. I'm Depress. by Cutehector(m): 5:19pm On Mar 17, 2023
But why do people not investigate and try to know their partner's financial habits before marriage.

To me that is a big issue.


And then i cant marry a lady who is addicted to her phone 24/7.

Total turn off. As if the world would end if she is separated from her phone for a sec.

33 Likes 4 Shares

Re: My Husband Is So Annoying. I'm Depress. by Nice2023(m): 5:29pm On Mar 17, 2023
Money u are supposed to use to relocate and leave that dishonest husband of yours is what u gave him to enhance his lifestyles.

Prepare to pay more.

U are truly unlucky I must say.


A man that can't buy pampers is even worst than any plague anyone can think of. Not that he is not working but he chose to be in debt.

Na u i pity pass...because a debtor is always a debtor.

23 Likes 3 Shares

Re: My Husband Is So Annoying. I'm Depress. by Mindlog: 6:12pm On Mar 17, 2023
Bottomless pit.

1 Like

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