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Stats: 1304073 members, 1857558 topics. Date: Friday, 30 January 2015 at 06:02 PM
Monstrous Mothers Who Killed Their Own Children / Unmarried Mothers To Be Fined In Chinese City To Cut Size Of Population / Why do Fathers Love their Daughters More & Mothers their Sons? (1) (2) (3) (4)
|Mothers Plzzzzz Help Me by parisienne(f): 7:30pm On Oct 11, 2011|
|Re: Mothers Plzzzzz Help Me by Jenifa1: 7:34pm On Oct 11, 2011|
I hope you get a response.
i'm sure there are also ways to improvise.
|Re: Mothers Plzzzzz Help Me by ifyalways(f): 6:43am On Oct 12, 2011|
Ok,maybe its just me or im being inconsiderate but I'd rather get a local carpenter or welder slap together a cot for me than go this route.
Are u planning on having just one baby?You can always keep the cot for the next baby.I hope you are not considering buying "used clothes" for the baby too?If you can afford the internet,surely you can do better. . .just saying.
|Re: Mothers Plzzzzz Help Me by blank(f): 4:49pm On Oct 12, 2011|
Wish u well but a cot is a very good investment for your baby. U can get a carpenter to make one for you. Or just forget about getting a cot and co-sleep with your baby.
|Re: Mothers Plzzzzz Help Me by mutter(f): 7:48pm On Oct 12, 2011|
blank i must commend you for being very reasonable. There is no need giving out money that could be used for more important things. What the hell is wrong in asking someone to come to your assistance.
This is basically the problem in Nigeria. Many people just want to live irrationally above their means.
I wonder what is wrong with getting second hand cloths for a baby? as a matter of fact. Many women who are enlightened go out of their way to get them because they say these cloths no longer contain chemicals from the production.
Poster i never had a cot and with most of my kids i did not even have a baby bed because my babies sleep with me and I realised it was just there for nothing.
|Re: Mothers Plzzzzz Help Me by ifyalways(f): 9:49pm On Oct 12, 2011|
Oh [b]J[/b]es,I'm not enlightened 'cos I won't wear my baby "used clothes" !
. . . and Yeah,I live way above my means for suggesting she gets a carpenter or welder to help her arrange a cot.
Next garbage Please!
|Re: Mothers Plzzzzz Help Me by Nekai(f): 10:09pm On Oct 12, 2011|
Used clothes are not as bad as you would think, since babies only stay in one size for a short period of time. I bought two boxes of used clothes, and I paid the equivalent of N6000. They lasted for the first 5 months. In fact some of the clothes were never even used. Babies grow so fast and I'm glad I didn't spend a fortune.
I hope you find what you are looking for!
|Re: Mothers Plzzzzz Help Me by horny4u(f): 10:11pm On Oct 12, 2011|
I think the Op does not want to say too much but its obvious that any mother will absolutely LOVE to buy a brand new cot and designer clothes for her unborn child . I like the way she asked while trying to protect her dignity here in the UK there are car boots and garage sales but not seen any in 9ja.
@ Op Congrats with the "coming new comer", I pray you get a cute cot soon and safe delivery too, May the Almighty bless us all.
|Re: Mothers Plzzzzz Help Me by Nobody: 10:13pm On Oct 12, 2011|
The lady is appealing for help on a used cot.
Is that too much to ask for from a fellow woman/mother?
If you are not ready to help her please just ignore the thread.
|Re: Mothers Plzzzzz Help Me by Johndoe100(m): 10:15pm On Oct 12, 2011|
I donLt agree with the second hand clothes bit. It is a step to far. If she can find someone to give her a cot, that is ok.l
|Re: Mothers Plzzzzz Help Me by horny4u(f): 10:38pm On Oct 12, 2011|
My dear, this our fingers are not equal oh, still na grace all of us dey chop, The Lord will do it,
You said my mind. Thanks!
|Re: Mothers Plzzzzz Help Me by Jenifa1: 10:46pm On Oct 12, 2011|
there is nothing wrong with used clothes for a baby. esp if the baby has a older sibling
and if using a carpenter is reasonable/she can afford it, she should definitely go for it.
|Re: Mothers Plzzzzz Help Me by cotton101(f): 11:02pm On Oct 12, 2011|
what is wrong with used baby clothes - in fact considering the price of things for a baby in the first year - most people buy or are given things that are used. why will i spend bucket loads of money when I can save the money in a high interest children's savings account.
U know this is why you can buy something for £1 in the UK and sell it for £10 in nigeria - no one wants to bargain hunt its more "my own cost more than your own"
poster look into getting a travel cot - they are cheaper and take up less space. poster don't mind some people here - no one knows ur situation better than you, if you were in the UK i could point you in the right direction for all this.
|Re: Mothers Plzzzzz Help Me by ifyalways(f): 4:05am On Oct 13, 2011|
First off,Y'all foaming by the mouths should just STFU 'cos none of you have provided the much needed help ie providing a cot especially the dolts saying "If you are not ready to help,why not ignore the thread",too hard to even take your own advises?
OP,Lives in Lagos so all these used clothes is cheaper in "UK" does not hold water.New china simple cotton baby clothes sell between N400 to N1500 while UK/US(and wherever) used,chemical treated baby clothes sell btwn N250 to N600.The traders lie on it,wipe hands and clean sweats with it(all the way from Togo,Cotonou to Lagos) and when buyers gather,omg its another sight.From the dirty bare floor where its dumped to all what not. . . all these for a baby's tender skin?so what gives?why not buy 3 new ones rather than buying a boxload of trash that might "hurt" the baby's tender skin ?
How many of you here wud use "Naija" sold fairly used clothes for your "babies" ? Hypocrites,advising someone to do what u know deep down that u won't do.
|Re: Mothers Plzzzzz Help Me by ifyalways(f): 4:20am On Oct 13, 2011|
Talking of baby cot,a carpenter or welder might be able to get her one with N15 to N20k.
For as long as the OP can afford to buy BB,order clothes for herself online,she "ought" to be able to atleast get that for her child "IF" its important to her that her child sleeps on a cot.This is my opinion,y'all don't have to agree with me.
Anyhoo,priorities differs.Look good,wear the best clothes and shoes while the kids soak garri ati ekpa . . .they won't die,it wud make them stronger.
|Re: Mothers Plzzzzz Help Me by femmy2010(m): 4:59am On Oct 13, 2011|
I am not a mother but I do understand her plight. frankly,I see no wrong in the request made by the lady.
@op,email me how to reach you to firstname.lastname@example.org
May the new born bring into your world,the sweetest of life(amen).
|Re: Mothers Plzzzzz Help Me by Nobody: 6:29am On Oct 13, 2011|
I agree with Ify abeg. If poster can aford BB or internet then your child deserves the best, what is more important than making your child(esp if it's the first one) comfy? If the Op is not using the cyber cafe why can't she afford good things.
And please people, pleaseeeeeeeeee do not compare obodo oyibo'S bought second hand clothes to Naija's. No space for comparisons at all. I recently bought a barbie's skirt that was on sale for just 15 dollars(original price was 79.95 dollars) is that one not as cheap as second hand clothes?
My opinion please so don't bite me(not that I care anyways), the only second hand clothes my younger kids are allowed to wear are the same ones their elder sibilings wore.
If a woman can afford a BB, very expensive clothes and shoes, then she can do better.
God forbid Naija second hand, have you all visited tejuosho market before? Tufiakwa.
|Re: Mothers Plzzzzz Help Me by Nobody: 6:43am On Oct 13, 2011|
I find your comments very rude.
This lady asked for a cot and you are going on about her using the internet,
Do you know that some people lack a personal computer and go to business centres and cyber cafes to post?
Do you know if she is using an office computer?
The fact that she is on the internet does not mean she has money.
She pleaded for a USED cot and you start talking down on her?Your fellow woman?Totally pathetic.
If this same woman had come here to run down her husband as a no good cheating SOB,all the feminists would be praising her and giving her the obnoxious advise to divorce her husband.Sickening.
@OP,please post your email address,so we can see what we can do.Cheers.
|Re: Mothers Plzzzzz Help Me by horny4u(f): 7:53am On Oct 13, 2011|
I really feel for OP not because she asked for a cot, gosh its good she asked for help. Just that she must feel really bad for asking now, I bet it must be hard to ask in real life and she came anonymously to the internet to ask which is probably to cover her dignity.
OP , rich's idea of email address is a good one ( not a facebook traceable one ) then people who wish to help can do that discreetly and your dignity will still be intact,
Also Op lift your head up nothing is wrong with asking for help or living within the means that you are in at that moment, all na season!
That baby may be tomorrow's Bill Gate , many people started with no cots or new clothes, in my books the most important thing for a new born is lots of love, everything else will fall in to place after that, so please remain happy, some have cot but no baby, the Almighty has blessed you tremendously , do keep your heart grateful and not unhappy no matter what.
These fingers are not equal and tomorrow will be better than today, no one is holy but compassion is feminine but seems more men have it than women.
|Re: Mothers Plzzzzz Help Me by Nobody: 8:02am On Oct 13, 2011|
Thanks for your lovely and intelligent post.
It takes guts for a woman to come on the internet to plead for help,but for fellow women to come out and in a sanctimonious way talk down on her is just sickening.
Poster please do not be dis couraged.
Some of us are with you 100% on this one.
For the haters:She/he who has never asked/begged another for something in her/his entire life should cast the next stone.NUFF SAID!!!
|Re: Mothers Plzzzzz Help Me by horny4u(f): 8:07am On Oct 13, 2011|
Ify N15,000 is somebody's monthly salary honestly speaking.
if you have a cot you are not using or baby's clothes you are not using give OP abeg. My Dad did not board a car until he was 15 yrs old, talkless of new clothes, today he is a milion miles from his former lifestyle , he sings how lucky we are.
Lets be a bit careful not to strip off the dignity from a fellow human, she no steal o, na born she wan born, I have read your past comments on NL and donot think you are a bad person but in this case you are not checking out your fingers none of them is equal and Baba do am so,
I know how you feel about wearing used clothes from katagora for a new born but its because you have , some people will jump up with halleluya for those same clothes , let us allow each live in dignity within the provision of his/her Creator, tomorrow is better than today bo.
|Re: Mothers Plzzzzz Help Me by chaircover: 8:11am On Oct 13, 2011|
|Re: Mothers Plzzzzz Help Me by mutter(f): 8:13am On Oct 13, 2011|
IT is relieving to see that there are still so many reasonable and compassionate people in the world. Most people when the have their first child are not as financially stable or mature as with their other kids, so the first kid often does not get what the later ones get. The do however get loads of love and attention and that is the most important thing kids need.
It is absolutely recommendable that this lady is being reasonable about the finances in the family. This is the stage to invest and grow. Sadly people who do not know how to live within their means always end up doing desperate and immoral things to make ends meet.
We also should not judge others from our own situation.
Personally I have seen so many marriages break up because of finances. Not because the money is not enough but because one partner is not willing to be reasonable about it. The only factor determining what you give out for a baby is how much you earn and not doing it because A and B did it.
I wish more women in Nigeria get as reasonable as this lady, it will certainly do Nigeria allot of good if people learn to live aaccording to their means.
Ifyalways why get so aggressive? You must be hurting real bad somewhere inside
|Re: Mothers Plzzzzz Help Me by chaircover: 8:15am On Oct 13, 2011|
MUTTER!!!!! where have you been? Its been quite a while. Hope you and the family are doing good
|Re: Mothers Plzzzzz Help Me by ifyalways(f): 8:16am On Oct 13, 2011|
@Femmy,God bless you richly.You provided the needed "fish" while mine is why beg/look for fish when you have the "nets and fishing rod?"
@Jenny,thank you for trying to understand where im coming from.If we as individuals cannot get our priorities right do we have any right complaning about the state of our nation?They all can chose not to say it as it is but the truth must be told.
How many of the noise makers wud wear their grown kids not even babies naija sold used clothes?How many of them wud choose to throw away N25K on BB when they know their baby is due in a couple of months and they "NEED" a cot? Aside reeking of bad financial management is that not greed?Trying to keep up with the Joneses?
God wud always provide but man must do his part by staying true to himself,atleast.
|Re: Mothers Plzzzzz Help Me by mutter(f): 8:17am On Oct 13, 2011|
Work and kids has a way of robbing you of time!!!
|Re: Mothers Plzzzzz Help Me by horny4u(f): 8:18am On Oct 13, 2011|
Na so, I think the Almighty does it like that so that when we see someone in that state we can relive those times and feel for them,
|Re: Mothers Plzzzzz Help Me by horny4u(f): 8:30am On Oct 13, 2011|
Have you got proof that she uses BB?
People wear used clothes for their babies all the time, used or new clothes donot remove from a child, that child child came with no clothes anyway and children without parents stay alive and do better things.
Its in 9ja people look down or up on each other becos of clothes na so so black cloth oyinbo dey wear they donot care and yet see how their system works to help the needy and the under priviledged.
She asked for a f%^king cot if you have it you give it to if not, let her alone.
if she has BB and chooses to get a used cot i still see nothing wrong , as they BB may be a business tool that will enhance lil johnny future and if a cot or used clothes is lying down somewhere unused that is one less thing to get little johnny.
See madam we are not our clothes, BB, brazillian weave, brand new cots or those stuff, we are compassionate spiritual beings who thrive in peace of mind.
I work in fashion and i have seen the way people buy a product more if it is expensive than if it is cheap, same products o , same material , same madness and its mostly we women,
Johnny will not be in the cot forever and she prefers to invest his cot money and get a used one , so be it !
I still say lets keep her dignity intact, afterall its only the Almighty blessing we are chopping not our own know how.
|Re: Mothers Plzzzzz Help Me by ifyalways(f): 8:34am On Oct 13, 2011|
@Hot,don't waste your time going through my old posts,I don't dance to the gallery nor trying to please anyoneOn here,Keeping it real 24/7.
I'm mobile now and can't start quoting people but I remember vividly that a few months back,OP was looking and ready to throw away N25k for a BB phone.There was also when she was buying clothes for herself,just few months ago.
She definitely is a role model of what a "godly and wise" woman is.The type that wud starve the family just so she'd buy her designer bag.
Wasted enough time here already.Funny it took my post to get the "wolves" finally contribute to getting the cot.and lets hope the OP wont sell the new cot to get herself a weave.
|Re: Mothers Plzzzzz Help Me by mutter(f): 8:44am On Oct 13, 2011|
Ifyalways you are right where you are right
that is one aspect °i cannot stand in mothers either. Well I never read the posters past posts and i certainly cannot judge her on what is written here but the point you make here is absolutely authentic.
Personally I invest most of my money on my kids. I do not care how much I have to sacrifice and forfiet. I brought them into this world and it is my duty to give them the best within my means.
|Re: Mothers Plzzzzz Help Me by IfeLuvely: 9:15am On Oct 13, 2011|
@ chaircover, wow!!! You must share your life story to go to others as a lesson,cos to be honest with you, nowadays not many woman will stay with a husband that is not buoyant to suffer with them and until things are better.
@ OP, if u dnt turn n toss like me whilst sleeping, let the baby co share with you, if not there wud be family that have had a baby before that can give u a cot, or u can use moses basket, I'm expecting too n have decided to buy just a moses basket that the baby will use till maybe three months so that after that the baby will start co sharing with me.
Buying used clothes for babies is not a bad thing, but I personally won't do it, I will rather buy two/three new clothes n we manage that until he or she grows out of them
|Re: Mothers Plzzzzz Help Me by Siena(m): 9:32am On Oct 13, 2011|
Ify, your comments shock me. Parisienne asked for assistance, in the form of a used cot. What is so wrong with that? What does her request have to do with her using the internet, or a Blackberry? You dismiss views contrary to yours as "garbage." That is extremely rude, opinionated and not intelligent at all. This is not the sort of response I expect a woman to give a fellow sister. I get the feeling (I may be wrong though) you're looking down on Parisienne, because she chose to request help. Not good.
As per used clothes, there's absolutely nothing wrong with used baby clothes. I love my daughter to bits, and I tell you now - 90% of her clothes, from birth till present are used! Yes, used. People actually bag up clothes their babies used for a month, before out growing. Some still have tags, they were never worn, before they became too small. Babies grow up so fast. My daughter's first cradle cot was given to us, she used it for 4 months before she became too big, and heavy for it. What did we do? We also gave it out to another mother who needed it. We also bag up used baby clothes, and give them out. Some of these used clothes were given to us free, some we actually bought. Does that make us bad parents?
It doesn't mean these mothers love their babies any less, or can't afford new. It doesn't also mean we're superior to these mothers whose babies are wearing my daughter's old clothes. There's great joy in giving, and in receiving.
In Nigeria, my mother (God rest her soul) regularly bought used clothes for my kid sister, from when she was born till she was about three. There's nothing wrong with it. By all means, buy brand new for your children, if you can afford to do so, that's fine. But please, please, please don't look down on your fellow woman, because she dared ask for a used cot, and other baby items. Everyone's circumstances and priorities are different, if you can't help a sister in need, great. But don't make one that requests assistance in any form feel worthless, it's not nice, very unfair.
@ Parisienne, I wish you all the best, you'll have a safe delivery. We have bags of baby clothes, from birth to 15-months. We'll try getting some to you at some point. And the other stuff is in hand.
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