Do We Love An Individual Or Their Qualities? - Romance - Nairaland
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| Do We Love An Individual Or Their Qualities? by Nobody: 8:04pm On Oct 21, 2011 |
You know, this love thing has started to confuse me a bit. If I was to ask one of you guys on here why you love your partner? Most if not all of you will be listing qualities. "She is beautiful" "He is intelligent" "She is kind" blah blah blah the list goes on. There certain is no guarantee that the person will always be beautiful, intelligent, or kind. What if your partner lost those qualities? Which brings me to my question, do we love an individual or the qualities they possess? |
| Re: Do We Love An Individual Or Their Qualities? by Nobody: 8:20pm On Oct 21, 2011 |
[size=14pt]Beauty, intelligence, kindness blah blah blah, are all QUALITIES! And Different qualities come together to form an Individual, a personality, a persona. . . A Person! NO ONE is perfect, and different qualities make up different individuals! Individual=Qualities!. . . In my Opinion! [/size] |
| Re: Do We Love An Individual Or Their Qualities? by Nobody: 8:25pm On Oct 21, 2011 |
ur question (title) is faulty. what makes up an individual if not the possessory qualities? |
| Re: Do We Love An Individual Or Their Qualities? by Dyt(f): 8:31pm On Oct 21, 2011 |
Individual comes after d qualities smth must attract u 2 dat individual |
| Re: Do We Love An Individual Or Their Qualities? by Nobody: 8:32pm On Oct 21, 2011 |
toba: What if the person fundamentally changed in behaviour, attitude, and so forth? Will you still hang on there? |
| Re: Do We Love An Individual Or Their Qualities? by pendo89(f): 8:40pm On Oct 21, 2011 |
tricky quest this is roki. funny toba u though exactly like I did. Mmmh,what makes an individual are his/her qualities. That's why we say hes a bad guy or a mean gal. Now how do we separate the individual from qualities cz its like removing the soul from the body. Qualities whether good /bad= individual.( my opinion) Anyway assuming an individual here refers to physical appearance,the body ie .Given an option I would go for both. ie inner and outer qualities. But since there's none, I will choose the inner qualities because: 1. the outer wears out with time while the inner does not, 2. the outer could get damaged/destroyed but the inner remains the same. 3. the outer is only but a shell to carry the inner qualities.And we know it's the qualities which help you deal with life and make decisions. Just pray that you get both cz its all God given. |
| Re: Do We Love An Individual Or Their Qualities? by Candyness(f): 8:44pm On Oct 21, 2011 |
I love me, myself & I. You dont like, then I have somthin else you can kiss. Thats my message to haters |
| Re: Do We Love An Individual Or Their Qualities? by Nobody: 8:46pm On Oct 21, 2011 |
Candyness:Great message there dear. But that do not answer the question. |
| Re: Do We Love An Individual Or Their Qualities? by Nobody: 8:48pm On Oct 21, 2011 |
@Pendo, well said love. |
| Re: Do We Love An Individual Or Their Qualities? by Nobody: 8:49pm On Oct 21, 2011 |
rokiatu:if that happens then the person is no longer a human being lol. he/she may be called an animal cos theres nothing like an individual with qualities or character. Im being liked or loved by my manager cos im proactive. If i loose this quality, theres no guarantee of likeness anymore. quality attracts and quality makes an individual |
| Re: Do We Love An Individual Or Their Qualities? by yme1(f): 9:00pm On Oct 21, 2011 |
They both go together. You like someone cause u do but there are some certain qualities linked to it For some peeps they can't find a reason why they love a particular person Nd thts what I call real love. Because love does not have a certain reason or quality. I have never loved but I have liked someone for no just reason cause I couldn't find one quality that distinguished him from any other guy  . Tho certain qualities attracts more than the individual |
| Re: Do We Love An Individual Or Their Qualities? by Nobody: 9:04pm On Oct 21, 2011 |
y me:Gbam! Gbam! Gbam!!!!! Y me, you have to come partying with me.   |
| Re: Do We Love An Individual Or Their Qualities? by Nobody: 9:13pm On Oct 21, 2011 |
[size=14pt]If you as an Individual with qualities of your own, CANNOT lay hold to a reason why you love someone, that you cannot point out a certain reason or quality that endeared you to that person, then you are incontrovertibly obfuscated! And definitely DONT know the meaning of LOVE. . . Such people can Date Anyone or Anything! Yes ke! No reason. . . Catastrophic Confusion!. . .[/size] |
| Re: Do We Love An Individual Or Their Qualities? by pendo89(f): 9:22pm On Oct 21, 2011 |
y me: ^^lol but it has a cause don't you think so? I thought the kind of love you are talking about exists between parents and kids or siblings.You know close relations.Its called unconditional love. God's love too.Thief/murderer/liar/cheat/LovePeddler/polite/kind/caring you just love without reason. But in a guy/gal relationship there's is always a trace,a reason,a quality.It could be the soft or deep voice that makes your knees go weak or the look in that melts your heart or his caring attitude plus intelligence.What is the spark? am sure you will mention something if you look well. |
| Re: Do We Love An Individual Or Their Qualities? by slimyem: 10:20pm On Oct 21, 2011 |
here i am wondering how you can divorce an individual from his/her qualities, I swear, this question beats me! |
| Re: Do We Love An Individual Or Their Qualities? by Nobody: 1:21am On Oct 22, 2011 |
slimyem: Yes o, and it would be classified as "irreconcilable differences" lol. Some of the reasons for divorce are unbelievable. One woman divorced her husband because he never remembered to put the toilet seat down and his side of the room was always messy. People marry for the wrong reasons simply. |
| Re: Do We Love An Individual Or Their Qualities? by Nobody: 1:33am On Oct 22, 2011 |
ogugua88:wetin be this:  |
| Re: Do We Love An Individual Or Their Qualities? by Nobody: 1:40am On Oct 22, 2011 |
^^ Only for obodo oyibo. Something a life coach told us at a seminar. |
| Re: Do We Love An Individual Or Their Qualities? by iice(f): 3:43am On Oct 22, 2011 |
Qualities make up a person. He/she is a shell without them. I do not mean physical qualities but character qualities. I don't really believe in the 'change' of people. Their 'core' almost always remains the same. Sure, they can change a thing or two, but who he/she essentially is remains the same. I'm talking about people who have come into their own, who know themselves. |
| Re: Do We Love An Individual Or Their Qualities? by Nobody: 10:34am On Oct 22, 2011 |
I have been tryin 2 respond to d thread by claiming that qualities make up an individual, who is just a void without them. And that individuals can't change 'fundamentally'. Accordin 2 one poster, their core should remain essentially same. Bt then, certain diseases or accidents can indeed render people exceedingly fundamentally different from whom they had been. There are documented cases of people rendered totally changed in personality after major accidents. So, those qualities can indeed b reversd, while the individual remains same. Kafka's metamorphosis details an hypothetical case. Following this, am led to conclude nearly all people actually love others' qualities, for a start. When they then lose these qualities, it is left to their loved ones to choose to continue loving them as individuals. . . |
| Re: Do We Love An Individual Or Their Qualities? by Nobody: 11:53am On Oct 22, 2011 |
sauer:Wow I must say you are smart. |
| Re: Do We Love An Individual Or Their Qualities? by LordReed(m): 2:52pm On Oct 22, 2011 |
Sometimes we fall in love with an idea of a person this is infatuation and it changes as our perception of the person changes. Some cannot distinguish between infatuation and love hence you hear I have fallen out of love or even I hate him/her why because their perception, their idea changed. True love does not need qualities before it is engaged because love is a combination of emotional and actionable elements. That is why God can say love your neighbour. It doesn't matter who he is love him. If the love of your life changes drastically either physically or otherwise true love will not change. However certain circumstances(e.g. Violence) may dictate a parting but I do not see true love turning to hate. |
| Re: Do We Love An Individual Or Their Qualities? by coolestboy(m): 3:54pm On Oct 22, 2011 |
Loving sum1 is as a result of qualities seen in her/him. It can be calculated thus: L=p+q~c. The L is d love we r talkin abt, p, is d person u love + d qualities(q) seen in him/her, which wil directly leads 2 d compatibility btw d 2 parties. But, frankky speaking, real love exists without any qualities bcoz it is 99% axiomatic dt d seen qualities wil die or fade. WE OUGHT 2 LOVE WITHOUT QUALITIES, BECOZ GOD LOVED US WITHOUT ANY QUALITIES OR REASONS. |
| Re: Do We Love An Individual Or Their Qualities? by ajimmyadams: 4:02pm On Oct 22, 2011 |
there are many qualities in individuals but the main thing is his behavior! nice topic and interesting replies! send gifts to pakistan |
| Re: Do We Love An Individual Or Their Qualities? by MMM2(m): 4:08pm On Oct 22, 2011 |
maybe becos of d size of her nyash  |
| Re: Do We Love An Individual Or Their Qualities? by sunmatajai: 4:11pm On Oct 22, 2011 |
Loving An individual for the sake of the quality(ies) s/he possesses really worth it irregardless of their gender. The Bible point to the quality(faith/righteous) Abraham possess as a reason for God to refer to him as His friend- James 2:23 Judas was also despisedbecause of his trecherous attitude and latter hanged himself. These are two good and bad qualities of biblical examples of which individual is been noticed for. If we love someone because of good dispositions it makes a lot of sence for such qualities remain even if the person become maimed or even at death. |
| Re: Do We Love An Individual Or Their Qualities? by iice(f): 4:43pm On Oct 22, 2011 |
sunmatajai: His core was inherently cowardly. Nothing really changes that. You can mask it, adjust it but one day it will spew forth. |
| Re: Do We Love An Individual Or Their Qualities? by MarcAnthon(m): 5:26pm On Oct 22, 2011 |
If you can pick out the reason(s) u love someone then you haven't yet lost ur head. When u've lost it completely is when u haven't the slightest clue why u love them but u do anyway. That way whether they stay the same or change, it changes nothing-heard that from somewhere. Drawing from that I'll say most of the time we're still at the stage where we haven't yet 'lost our heads', and since u cannot separate the individual from his qualities -inner or outer - when they change, our disposition towards them changes as well. |
| Re: Do We Love An Individual Or Their Qualities? by Zaynee63: 5:45pm On Oct 22, 2011 |
Iice is right I believe. You know, the Prophet of Islam was reported to have taught that "men are made of gold, silver, bronze & etc; the best of them in ignorance remains of them in enlightenment." Everyman has core predilections that shape what their attitudes in every circumstance, enjoyment or adversity. Those core predilections are what we really look out for when we are looking for who to share our love with. You know when a person tells his/her object of love that he'd die for her, what he means essentially, unwittingly is that: "I love that core personality of yours. And I want it to endure as long as humanity survives cuz it is what makes the human beautiful. I am perfectly okay exiting this world knowing that it'll stay if I pay for it with my exit." Now it remains inherently one of our greatest challenges as humans to know how to identify those core values, who is made of gold |
| Re: Do We Love An Individual Or Their Qualities? by IZUKWU(m): 6:21pm On Oct 22, 2011 |
If we can tell exactly why we love somebody then, it is like and not love. I think it is the individual we fall in love with and not his characters per se , just that over time, we begin to appreciate their attributes. |
| Re: Do We Love An Individual Or Their Qualities? by fred2265: 6:39pm On Oct 22, 2011 |
There is no either / or here, a persons qualities are what goes to making them an individual. [img]http://s01.flagcounter.com/count/7uR/bg=FFFFFF/txt=FFFFFF/border=FFFFFF/columns=1/maxflags=1/viewers=3/labels=0/pageviews=0[/img][img]http://s10.flagcounter.com/count/oH/bg=FFFFFF/txt=FFFFFF/border=FFFFFF/columns=1/maxflags=1/viewers=3/labels=0/pageviews=0[/img] |
| Re: Do We Love An Individual Or Their Qualities? by Dsense(m): 6:51pm On Oct 22, 2011 |
OP. To my understanding and notion,I admit the Qualities compromise the Individual. . .you need to have glimpsed at someone extremely genius,amazing or vey phenomenal that might have attracted you and had called your attention before even moving closer to the individual . .and finally set new plan if to take it above. |
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