A woman told me that she feels appreciated when her spouse tells her I LOVE YOU. At the same time the man is a champion womanizer of which the wife is aware of and also maltreats her.

In my opinion I believe a man's actions speaks volumes of his love for the wife than the hypocritical deceptive slogan of "I LOVE YOU SYNDROME" many men are using to deceive their spouses to keep them in the illusion of they are for them. Women who deny realities prefer this.

I am of the opinion of whether it is said or not true love is more in actions than in words.What are your opinions great Nairalanders?

i believe that your actions speak louder than any words you may say. but remember, if the guy is a womanizer/abuser (or not) that doesnt automatically mean he doesnt love her.

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Well it depends on the woman.but i think most like hearing the word,even if they prefer action!BTW,you cant love some1 and cheat on her at the same time.

chaircover:


Back to the question. Depends on the couple. Some people like to hear it some people like to be shown it. For me personally actions speak louder than words but it is nice to hear it too 

When was the last time you heard it?.  . . . .Be sincere. . .

@ Topic, when exactly does saying I love you disappear in a marriage setting. . . .I know some friends that used to openly tell their spouses they love them publicly when talking on the phone or when they are together before they got married, now 3 -4 years into their marriages and I never hear them utter such words anymore. . . .

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chaircover:


Classified Information

I can confidently say e don tey be that. . . . . .Nothing dey happen sha as far as him na action man wey dey do wetin him suppose . . . .

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I like both

Sometimes, he can let me watch my romantic comedy on TV when a football game is on at the same time, and he stays there without even saying a word about it. That speaks much louder than words, and I truly appreciate it.

Sometimes he just hugs me and look at me with little stars in his eyes and say "I love you". And that is just perfect too.

What is important, I guess is to find balance between each person's needs so that no one will feel the lack of anything, be it actions or words.

I like both too, my hubby tells me like 2-3 times a day (and that is if we are in a good mood) ,and he acts it too. i am more of keep my feelings hidden type of a person, but with him am letting it out small small, because not only does he want to hear the ''i love you'' words, he also wants me to act it in everyway.

chaircover:

I keep on hearing this. How can you love someone that you cheat on or abuse. . . . . . Something that benefits the womanizer/abuser but in no way benefits the victim (sorry cant think of another word right now) . . . . .  .I just dont get it 

sadly the answer to this question lay with YOU women. a man is like a dog on a leash, the longer range you give him, the longer he will go. some women gladly accept that their men cheat (like the OP's story), some men beat their wives and flip the script that she deserved it and, soon enough, wifey will believe/accept it.

some men grew up seeing their fathers beat their mothers ALL THEIR LIVES, and therefore BELIEVE that this is love. some men have seen their father cheat on their mothers ALL THEIR LIVES, and therefore BELIEVE that this is the way a man acts and that THIS IS LOVE.

so it is all down to women to set the boundaries of that"love" because WE (men) would take it ALL (if we could).
example: tell your husband that you see no problem in him having some gals on the side, (because you only want to Be Intimate once a month from now on), and see if he is NOT going to find himself some young gals to service him. . . . . . . . .while his love for you wont change ONE BIT.