..

why dont you tighten up,or correct a particular turnoff and wait an see what happens

Sorry but it seems your husband is a jerk. I don't know how you have come to accept it. I wouldn't advice my female kin to. #Trulysorry

@ olas i had a cesearean section, so i am not sure what else i need to tighten, he said i gained to much weight i already lost 40 pounds and i am only 20 pounds heavier than my pre pregnancy weight

@ mac i stay and accept it because i dont want to be a single mother, i want my son to grow with his father even though its hard @ times to stay for example last night my son was sick so i took him to the hospital, well my husband dropped us off and picked up his girlfriend to spend the night in our house, im upset idk what else i can do

You need to wo´rk on yourself ,all the stretch marks and fat should be worked out

i always see does things as turnoffs,seems he likes sweet 16 looks and you can do it.

And some foods that increase anxiety and makes one excited are also possible

^ola dat was not a nice thing to say her

wot happened to his vows *Till death do them part *,now hes depriving the poor woman and u here are talking about stretch marks.Is it even her fault , nature gave them to her it all comes with pregnancy.

@op

I blame u for your situation ,u accepted  him cheating and also him making it aware to you he does shows no respect at all for you.The main reason hes not into you anymore is simple, his concumbines have won him over hence y he feels irritated by you .U picking faults about your weight is not d matter at hand, he should love u unconditionally regardless of how big or tiny u gotten.I question if he truly loves you sha  hmmm

Idowuogbo:

^ola dat was not a nice thing to say her

wot happened to his vows *Till death do them part *,now hes depriving the poor woman and u here are talking about stretch marks.Is it even her fault , nature gave them to her it all comes with pregnancy.

@op

I blame u for your situation ,u accepted  him cheating and also him making it aware to you he does shows no respect at all for you.The main reason hes not into you anymore is simple, his concumbines have won him over hence y he feels irritated by you .U picking faults about your weight is not d matter at hand, he should love u unconditionally regardless of how big or tiny u gotten.I question if he truly loves you sha  hmmm

she lives in the west,be real ,you cannot force 2 people together,even if heaven comes down.so your stance is just arrognant and will not solve it.she needs to remain humble and help herself

I am aware of her location ,she needs to humble wot a guy dats basically neglecting her

Like I said I question if he sends her sha , I have read her story well and to me it seems no matter wot she does hes always gona b a street rat .If d only thing that bothers her is intimacy den i repeat she is d cause of her problem , so many things seems wrong in the union and al that seems to affect her is sex.

Poster you say you are trying to have another baby but hes not having sex with you , Pls can you explain to me if dis act tells you he wants another baby.

If you have accepted his cheating ways and girlfriends, then I am sorry to say I have no respect and advise for you. Tufiakwa, azi Gba kwa


@ ola
Bless your stars that slave trade is over, I would have sold you out to the lowest bidder because it is not fair on us Nigerians and its definitely not fair on Nigeria  as a country also to have to deal wih or have any ties with someone who reeks of stoopidity, it is not fair at all .No insult intended. Merry Christmas

jennykadry:

If you have accepted his cheating ways and girlfriends, then I am sorry to say I have no respect and advise for you. Tufiakwa, azi Gba kwa


@ ola
Bless your stars that slave trade is over, I would have sold you out to the lowest bidder because it is not fair on us Nigerians and its definitely not fair on Nigeria  as a country also to have to deal wih or have any ties with someone who reeks of stoopidity, it is not fair at all .No insult intended. Merry Christmas

hahahahahahahaha jennny very sharp bedt gal

poster u don't want to be a single mother but when ur child is sick ur husband and child's father drops u at the hospital and goes off to see his girlfriend - I read correctly right?

I'm confused - what part of that story makes you think you are better than a single mother - at least the single mother only has to deal with a sick child and not a useless husband who might give her AIDS.

Honestly - b4 u even think of trying for another baby sort out ur marriage. U added weight after a baby - my goodness someone call CNN FOR breaking news - a woman has given birth and added some weight - is that a reason, KMT. STOP making excuses for this man, so if you had given birth to a girl would u have blamed her gender.

Ur story annoyed me - honestly i'm annoyed with you and ur husband. U should be worrying about the example ur son is being set and not that ur husband is not making love to u - there are some bigger issues at steak here,

cotton101:

poster u don't want to be a single mother but when your child is sick your husband and child's father drops u at the hospital and goes off to see his girlfriend - I read correctly right?

I'm confused - what part of that story makes you think you are better than a single mother - at least the single mother only has to deal with a sick child and not a useless husband who might give her AIDS.

Honestly - b4 u even think of trying for another baby sort out your marriage. U added weight after a baby - my goodness someone call CNN FOR breaking news - a woman has given birth and added some weight - is that a reason, KMT. STOP making excuses for this man, so if you had given birth to a girl would u have blamed her gender.

your story annoyed me - honestly i'm annoyed with you and your husband. U[b] should be worrying about the example your son is being set and not that your husband is not making love to u - there are some bigger issues at steak here, [/b]

My point exactly but it seems poster is more bothered about touchery SMH!

Forget it ,her mind is made up already. I wonder how smone in her right frame of mind would even think of having another child now? I pity your son, it wasn't his fault that two immature, stooopid, selfish, self centered azzholes brought him into this world. Do you two ever think of your son and the example you are setting for him? OMG

You wanna have s3x with a man whose manliness has been to third mainland bridge and now on its way to river niger? May God have mercy on you and if only I knew were yous lived, I would fight hard and strong to take your son away from you, he does not deserve these, he definitely does not deserve to be you and your husband's son. God have mercy on me and all of you

@jenny - na wah o - that was too harsh.

Poster SORT OUT UR MARRIAGE first b4 another child - ur son does not deserve to be exposed to a man that doesnt respect his wife and home,

SMH and we wonder why some men act bad - when they are taught this nonsense at home.

U added weight - are u victoria beckham that has tummy tuck after baby, honestly see what E channel and magazines have caused.

Do I look like I care if I sound harsh or not? If she can put up with a harsh husband, Who said she can't put up with a harsh e-friend? I have no respect whatsoever for selfish Parents, Geddit?

agiboma:

I am posting because i want some advice after having my son,my husband has lost interest in sex.

no he hasnt, he just lost interest in sex WITH YOU!!!!

He has so many girlfirends that he buys condoms and uses with them. How can i get him interested again.

why should he be interested in you when you've allowed him to sample anybody he likes?

I am fed up with fighting with him about the women i have accepted it but i dont know what to do about maintaining a intimate relationship with him.

just as you have accepted his cheating ways, he has also accepted that he doesnt need to mount you any longer. give us a good reason why he should?!

We are trying to have another baby but he does not want to make love to me anymore. Mature individuals please advise

another WHAT?! lol, i guess you think that will solve your problem, right?

agiboma:

@ olas i had a cesearean section, so i am not sure what else i need to tighten, he said i gained to much weight i already lost 40 pounds and i am only 20 pounds heavier than my pre pregnancy weight

i guess the extra 60 pounds IS the reason why you allowed this charade to go on for so long.

@ mac i stay and accept it because i dont want to be a single mother, i want my son to grow with his father even though its hard @ times to stay for example last night my son was sick so i took him to the hospital, well my husband dropped us off and picked up his girlfriend to spend the night in our house, im upset idk what else i can do

pls sista, have some DAMN respect for yourself!!! your man is even fukcing these women in your marital bed and you are here focusing on BS. how desperate (to be married) are you?! is this YOUR idea of what loving marriages are?

Why shouldn't he when he knows that he has you at home to feed him after his girlfriends have worn him out with marathon sex. Show yourself some respect and maybe then he may respect you. How can you claim you are doing it for your son. He will grow up and think you are what an example of a woman is. He will never be able to treat a woman with dignity and respect because you taught him that you are less than a human being. The bomb blast has been heavy on my mind all day but your posts is so highly irritating to me. It is the child I feel sorry for

did someone hack into MBJ account and post the above? I can see next year is going to be vey fruitful.

This story is quite a bit pathetic,  . Is this a super story? So in short, the guy is bringing his girlfriends home to your matrimonial bed while his son is sick in the hospital. Dont worry, soon he will move the girlfriend in, and ask you to prepare their meal. The handwriting is on the wall for you, pick some clues and maybe some self respect. Goodluck. I think in your case, being a single mother is a necessity. Dont worry about the boy, he will get to know the real situation of things when he is older and will appreciate a strong mother. God has blessed you by not letting you get pregnant so soon again. Take this your gift of a son, and run away.  This is the advice i will give my sister. You will find a man that will appreciate you and your son. Dont kill yourself over anyone. This guy doesnt care about you. Stop the sex, and start planning your exit. Dont hold on to something that is not there. This will only get worse. Go to your bible and rely on God's words at this difficult time. WIth careful planning and faith, you will have cause to rejoice again. I promise you. Just forget this union and start withdrawing now.

@OP, do not mind Jenny's harsh words, she just loves to talk like that (that doesn't make it appropriate though). However, I think you get the idea of what you should do. Like I said earlier, I would not advise my female relatives to be with such a man. It would be wickedness for me to ask you to do the same.

Other people have said the same thing. Take the hint!

Appropriate ko, appreciate ni. You know I like talking like that so let me be. Stalking me is really not helping

jennykadry:

Appropriate ko, appreciate ni. You know I like talking like that so let me be. Stalking me is really not helping

I don't know if you realize this but your harsh words can really dampen a vulnerable person's spirit. I was talking to OP not you. Why should I be stalking you, say wetin happen? If I wanted to stalk there are more appropriate options available for me to stalk jor!

I also don't know if you know this, but I don't care I my harsh words dampens anybody's heart or backside, and yea, 20 of you never reach to stalk me, find your level sir.

The last time I checked you were talking to me bu hiding behind he op, you dry fear? Abeg waka

@jenny you are mean

@ 2much all thanks for the reply, i recently moved back to Nigeria 3 weeks ago, ive been in my homeland Canada since i delivered my baby 18 ,months ago. My husband had been coming to Canada every few months to see us. So now i moved back to Nigeria with no family in this country except my 18 month old baby, to see this man's lifestyle is so permiscous. I dont want to take my son and return to Canada as he wont know his father and i dont want that for my son. I am trying to be understanding so that this relationship will work for my son's sake. I grew up with a single mom and i simply dont want that for my son.

The only thing is that i dont want to fight with this man anymore we have been fighting since i got pregnant with my son about him and his women and we recently started to get along again and i just dont want the disagreement to start over again.

Please if you are only going to be mean and not post anything constructive, dont post at all.

poster - I feel for you HONESTLY I DO but you have to sort out your marriage b4 trying for another baby, also try and get elders involved so that if you do have to leave u know u did everything.

You say you are in Nigeria with no family I hope you are aware that if your husband decides to take his behaviour that one step further he can kick you out of the house and take your son and let him be raised by another woman. whats worse being a single mum or having ur son raised by a woman that will probably abuse him.

Think hard my dear cos if he decides to leave you he WILL TAKE YOUR SON and no law will protect u, Nigeria is not Canada.

I understand what you are going thru but you are focusing on the wrong things at the moment. I understand fully why you dont want to be a single mother but its not good for this toddler to see his mum upset all the time.

@ cotton i undertand what you are saying but my son is not Nigerian he was born in Canada i have his Canadian passport, i dont think my husband will go to this extent. He is a womanizer, its not just me for so long i blamed myself feeling that i was not attractive enough or i gained to much weight after my son, but i have lost so much of the weight already i am only 2 dress sizes larger than befor i got pregnant and i dont have stretch marks. If i begin to sniff things are getting really bad i wont say a word to him i know where the airport is and how to get their he fully well knows that he would have to kill me to take my son away, i love my baby he is the best thing i ever got from this man. My husband would not take him away he has another son that he walked away from, despite his womanizing ways he belives no man should take a child from the mother @ least that one i can be assured off because of his prior history. This relationship is not easy by any means its so different from the western men i dated in the past, but fighting with him does not work so i am just trying to understand and be as humble as i can be. On another note when we are in Canda he is a different person he behaves like a western person but in Nigeria he is a complete local no offence intended.

^Darling after digesting all ur write up I can fully say ur husband doesn't care an inch about you or ur baby, he's living a free-willy life style cus he knows his got ur self esteem in the levels he wants it to be, stop torturing urself emotionally u certainly worth more than u allowing ursef to settle for "Joy comes not from perfections but from d ability to see beyond imperfection".U doing urself and ur son no good bin around someone dats shows no ounce of respect for you.B brave am sure u no wot to do,you might be on the right track but if you just sit there you will get distracted from acheiving greatness.Good luck do it for ur son and urself.

agiboma:

@ cotton i undertand what you are saying but my son is not Nigerian he was born in Canada i have his Canadian passport, i dont think my husband will go to this extent. He is a womanizer, its not just me for so long i blamed myself feeling that i was not attractive enough or i gained to much weight after my son, but i have lost so much of the weight already i am only 2 dress sizes larger than befor i got pregnant and i dont have stretch marks. If i begin to sniff things are getting really bad i wont say a word to him i know where the airport is and how to get their he fully well knows that he would have to kill me to take my son away, i love my baby he is the best thing i ever got from this man. My husband would not take him away he has another son that he walked away from, despite his womanizing ways he belives no man should take a child from the mother @ least that one i can be assured off because of his prior history. This relationship is not easy by any means its so different from the western men i dated in the past, but fighting with him does not work so i am just trying to understand and be as humble as i can be. On another note when we are in Canda he is a different person he behaves like a western person but in Nigeria he is a complete local no offence intended.

Are you black or white? I know the question sounds wrong but it could give us some insight into some of the issues you are raising here.

maclatunji:

Are you black or white? I know the question sounds wrong but it could give us some insight into some of the issues you are raising here.

does it matter? she might be nigerian but born and raised abroad. To be honest, there are so many issues here that I am sorry to say the only way is out, he can't behave like this in canada cos he knows if you walk he loses - in nigeria u walk u get nada, my dear forget that one about Canadian passport - ur son is nigerian because he has a nigerian father. trust me on this - it is something I have researched myself.

Ur self esteem is at rock bottom right now and this man is causing u mental torture - I have been there, if not for ur son u probably wake up and wonder what is the point of this life and marriage. This man is totally disrespecting and humiliating you and as I type i'm disgusted by his behaviour.

If he has a son he has walked away from - my dear it doesn't sound as if this man is the type that wants a stable family. I don't even know what to say again.