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5 Things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts - Family (8) - Nairaland

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Re: 5 Things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts by bigbumper(f): 11:54pm On Jan 04, 2012
Stillwarra

Haha, don't mean to dredge this up, but my modest self couldn't help it tongue

https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-349411.320.html#msg4904879 See all that from Eldee for me, chai my head dey swell cheesy

https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-349411.320.html#msg4906350 Now incase you still aren't sure, see Eldee again on the same thread saying "Busy_body, you knew i was talking about you all along right" angry angry angry cry cry
Re: 5 Things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts by snickpick(f): 1:38am On Jan 05, 2012
I tink am in btw. But sometimes pple tink am pretendin, wat can I really do abt it
Re: 5 Things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts by Kobojunkie: 10:39pm On Jan 06, 2012
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Re: 5 Things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts
« #40 on: January 02, 2012, 04:54 PM »
A great part of this article seems to be about me. Judging from it, I'd say I fall under the introvert category.

Very funny how these ''introverts'' suddenly become extraverted on NL.   

There is a research out that suggests that the internet provides for introverted beings a world where they can freely express themselves and anonymously handle possible rejection that may follow.

And there is the suggestion that a lot of the people who spend time in text chat rooms and forums are more introverts than extroverts. Extroverts spend more time on the phone, video chatting and going out.
Re: 5 Things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts by Kobojunkie: 10:45pm On Jan 06, 2012
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Re: 5 Things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts
« #192 on: January 03, 2012, 11:35 AM »
Not to offend anyone here, I am also introverted but I don't think staying in your house for a week/weeks is an healthy thing to do, you do that constantly and you end up forgetting the basic conventions and rules of interacting in society (I guess that's why a lot of introverts do weird stuff when interacting with others) besides even if you are not meeting up with friends or whatever, you can go out and work, make money, become rich; that is unless you're doing an online job. . . . again, no offence.

But you are wrong! The reason for the article is to get people to drop all presumptions on introverts and what it means to live as one, and open their minds to the differences that exist.

There are introverts who run their own businesses from home, interact constantly with others over IM or phone,and make even more money than you could dream of. Being introverted is not wrong, and it does not rob you of the human side of you. It is simply what you are. Trying to impose societal views on people who are themselves not well understood in most of our society is.
Re: 5 Things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts by Nobody: 2:00am On Jan 07, 2012
I am a CLASSIC example of an introvert. the most i talk is ON NAIRALAND. grin grin

in parties i would know EVERYONE and still be in the corner just sipping on the same bottle of wine co0ler grin
just observing. I DESPISE lame jokes and small talk. kiss kiss

I love to research, problem solve and just be alone or with people i trust, which are FEW in numbers. cool
I used to be terribly shy but now not so much. I am not even afraid to speak in front of hundreds of people ( as i have on several occasions - and actually enjoy it smiley ) however i love being to myself. I love to think - i don't have a choice, i always am!! grin

i love being an introvert. the only problem is that i get stereotyped and most of my friends i initially had beef with because they mistakenly read me to be "stand offish" or "conceited" but in reality i am a sweet person. I just have a low tolerance rate lol but i do love people. smiley
Re: 5 Things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts by Nobody: 4:10am On Jan 07, 2012
big_bumper:

Stillwarra

Haha, don't mean to dredge this up, but my modest self couldn't help it tongue

https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-349411.320.html#msg4904879 See all that from Eldee for me, chai my head dey swell cheesy

https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-349411.320.html#msg4906350 Now incase you still aren't sure, see Eldee again on the same thread saying "Busy_body, you knew i was talking about you all along right" angry angry angry cry cry

God save you I cannot write the Igbo in my head now, I for finish you. Wish Jenny was here so she can translate for me. angry cheesy Booo. tongue
Re: 5 Things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts by Pharoh: 5:36am On Jan 07, 2012
@MzDarkskin

That was a good write up and the examples you gave indicates you are truly one, guess some people just have to work on that fear of facing the crowd like me. I so much cherish the research and problem solving but in solitary confinement or in an environment that i have absolute control and not one where someone will just bump on me. grin

Do you like working in a team? even if you do but your best output comes when u work alone right?.The stereotype pushed me to be more open, friendly, social and do things to fit in to some of my network and am glad for that though but still cherish my introvert attribute. Just to have start holding a notepad or a device where i can put my ideas, problem solving solutions as they keep coming and flying off my head.

Will speak more and love to read personal stories of other introverts cool.
Re: 5 Things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts by tpia5: 8:48am On Jan 07, 2012
^^you bought into the team player hype, i see.


please dont think that will necessarily make any big difference in people's overall attitude towards you.

it's just a ruse to keep you hoping.
Re: 5 Things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts by Nobody: 3:25pm On Jan 07, 2012
Pharoh:

@MzDarkskin

That was a good write up and the examples you gave indicates you are truly one, guess some people just have to work on that fear of facing the crowd like me. I so much cherish the research and problem solving but in solitary confinement or in an environment that i have absolute control and not one where someone will just bump on me.  grin

Do you like working in a team? even if you do but your best output comes when u work alone right?.The stereotype pushed me to be more open, friendly, social and do things to fit in to some of my network and am glad for that though but still cherish my introvert attribute. Just to have start holding a notepad or a device where i can put my ideas, problem solving  solutions as they keep coming and flying off my head.

Will speak more and love to read personal stories of other introverts  cool.

Awesome! Lol. The thing is, being human we were designed to be social. However I think there should be a limit. Lol Some folks will just meet someone and just talk their ears off (unfortunately victim is usually an introvert tongue). That has never been me. I would just enter a room, find an isolated spot and not say a word to anyone unless it is necessary. Mind you its not to be rude but I love being alone.

The internet is like a haven for us introverts because we can interact but we dont have to go outside of our comfort zones physically.

And I dont mind working in teams but I prefer to do for and rely on myself. I find it very rewarding to be able to conduct on your own and get the same outcome as if you in a group. They say 'no man is an island' which is true, but I'm ok with being alone. smiley
Re: 5 Things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts by yommy2sure(m): 4:22am On Jan 08, 2012
[color=#000099][/color]a bif thank you to the operator and everyone who contributed, I am an Introvert maybe 70% intro but I love myself a 100%, the point is I connect and make friends wit few ppl but wit this few ppl i am 150% extroverted, i find it very boring relating wit ppl i dnt connect wit in any way,wit guys its harder to connect 'cos im one of the few boys that doesnt like football,nd wen guys gather dey r 99% of d time talking football.I like going out but not alone, it must in the company of a fun friend. i value my alone time like seriously.i remember then in sch wen preparing for a test, sumtimes friends will cumova nd we solve problems together, no matter how much we solve together i still dont beleive Iv read until i go through everytin wen im alone while others were just okay wit the grp stuff, bottom line whether intro or extro, learning to love urself is the greatest love of love-whitney housten song
Re: 5 Things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts by Challas(m): 9:57am On Jan 08, 2012
Big up!!!Kobojunkie,
Re: 5 Things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts by bigbumper(f): 10:24am On Jan 16, 2012
stillwater:

God save you I cannot write the Igbo in my head now, I for finish you. Wish Jenny was here so she can translate for me. angry cheesy Booo. tongue



Yes, yes, yes, I made heaven cheesy Heaven is real oh my people grin

Tpia the bubbly effervascent bubbly thingymabob with enough fizz and jizz to fill the whole soda bottle in the world is an introvert shocked Debosky an introvert ke, who like me would turn up at the sound of an envelope lipsrsealed Kobojunkie whom with her 21 questions one can never get a word in edgewise, an introvert lipsrsealed Darkskin an introvert grin The world is finished. This world has definitely ended. Get thee behind me devil and stop shouting at the top of your lungs that they are fibbing. . .

Hahaha, thank God I made heaven, cos I can see the Biblical Pharaoh strolling and skipping hand in hand with MsDarkskin and him nodding his head in agreement to everything she is saying, I wonder what they are talking about sef tongue


See me sef resting beside the Stillwater, but as it is with the typical human nature, hear her asking me to sneak out of Heavens gate to go and have a quick puff of igbo (marijuana) with her, SMH, I need to have a word with Baba God that since my room in yabaleft is now empty, a stint there would not go/be amiss with/for stillwater.

Ooooohhhh gosh, shouldn't there be an hierachy or something in this place called Heaven, see what me that Eldee called an highly intellectual superbeing is now being reduced to cos I am being forced to rub minds with B listers like Stillwater hence reason I am struggling with the appropriate words to use. My Dearest all-seeing, all-knowing Baba God, you saw Eldee's list na, so we definitely need to have a planning and protocol meeting as soon as possible cos things surely cannot continue like this.  shocked shocked grin
Re: 5 Things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts by firestar(f): 12:37pm On Jan 23, 2012
^Chei.
Lol.
Calm down babes, you're spazzin'!
Re: 5 Things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts by bigbumper(f): 2:09pm On Jan 23, 2012
firestar:

^Chei.
Lol.
Calm down babes, you're spazzin'!



Babe, stop jeluxing me, if you just wake up to discover yourself in heaven just like i have, wouldn't you be delirious and giddy with effervescent joy too tongue

Chai see suya and pounded yam with ogbono growing on trees, chei, I am definately in heaven for real cheesy 

Gotta run, nah I mean gotta soar and glide through the air (this Heaven is taken some time to get used to I tell ya) anyway say hi to your fellow earthlings on Planet Earth for me will ya kiss
Re: 5 Things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts by Kikinki(f): 10:56am On Jan 25, 2012
thanks poster for this topic

I am introvert personified,i used to think am a loner but now,i am properly educated. I was convinced that i am a very pretty and tall girl by my extrovert friends and, i should come out more to be seen, they even advised that i go for beauty pageant of which tried Miss NYSC abuja, 2011 batch c, and i was the second runner up. But i moderate my lime light, i dont like to be in the lime light always because it fades overtime, i usually think i should appear like the shooting star, that is not often seen.

this has worked perfectly for me both socially and academically.i excelled so much in whatever i set my mind on because i didnt let my beauty gain so much on me.well being in the middle is best but not everybody body can.in my first year at uni, there is this extroverted friend of mine.Any time am with her, she gets all the attention and i walways felt like a dust beater next to sunshine barbie, but with time i improved on myself, and got convinced that am very chic and equal to these extrovert brethren.


it fun sha cheesy cheesy
Re: 5 Things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts by StepG: 4:40pm On Apr 24, 2013
Kobojunkie: [size=14pt]Five things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts[/size]
http://briankim.net/blog/2007/10/top-5-things-every-extrovert-should-know-about-introverts/


First off, there are those who are reading this who might not know which camp they fall into, the extrovert or the introvert. Chances are, the majority of those reading this will know, but for those who don’t, let’s define those two terms here very broadly.
Extroverts tend to be those who are more energized when around other people. They are the ones who will reach for the cell phone when alone for more than a minute, the ones who love to go out every weekend, the ones who love to chit chat, mingle, and socialize.

Introverts tend to be those who are more energized when alone with themselves. They are the ones who have to be dragged to parties, who are the first ones ready to leave after a short period of time, and who generally enjoy solitary activities such as reading, writing, and daydreaming.
The qualities and characteristics of introverts are often held in a negative light in today’s world, so it’s only natural that the majority of people seem to think that there’s something wrong with them. The reason why the majority of people think that there’s something wrong with introverts is because the majority of people aren’t very knowledgeable when it comes to introverts, in terms of why they are the way they are and why they do the things they do.

Many people tend to hold several potentially damaging misconceptions about introverts, but through no fault of their own.
I’ve been on both sides of the extrovert/introvert fence, and I can understand why extroverts tend to view introverts in a negative light, socially speaking, so I thought it would be best to write an article dedicated to helping extroverts understand their often very misunderstood introvert counterparts.

My hope is this article will help solve that problem by shedding some light as to why introverts are the way they are and do the things they do, so here are 5 things every extrovert should know about introverts.

[size=13pt]1. If a person is introverted, it does NOT mean they are shy or anti-social.[/size]
This is probably THE biggest misconception that extroverts tend to have when it comes to introverts.
And you can’t really blame them for having that kind of misconception.
Extroverts tend to have to drag introverts to parties, to convince them to go and sell them on attending social engagements. When introverts politely decline, extroverts automatically assume that something might be wrong so they always ask if everything’s all right and of course, everything is all right. It’s just a common misunderstanding. When extroverts see a pattern like this developing, they automatically assume that introverts are shy or anti-social as that can be the only logical explanation to them. What’s more, when extroverts try to engage introverts in small talk, it seems like they hit a brick wall.
Add to that, most extroverts see that introverts tend to be fond of engaging in solitary activities such as reading, writing, and daydreaming.
Well, if it walks like a duck, talks like a duck, it must be a duck right?
Wrong.
Introverts have more brain activity in their frontal lobes and when these areas are activated through solitary activity, introverts become energized through processes such as problem solving, introspection, and complex thinking.
Extroverts on the other hand tend to have more activity in the back of their brain, areas that deal with processing sensory information from the external world, so they tend to search for external stimuli in the form of interacting with other people and the outside world to energize them.
There’s a deeper science to this that involves differences in the levels of brain chemicals such as acetylcholine and dopamine in extroverts and introverts, but I won’t get into that.

The bottom line is that introverts are just wired differently than extroverts. There’s nothing “wrong” with them. They just become energized through different processes depending on where the majority of their brain activity takes place.

Granted there are introverts who may be shy and anti-social, but that’s just a coincidence that perpetuates the myth that ALL introverts are like that. You’ll find that all introverts are fine just the way they are until people begin to subtly suggest otherwise.

[size=13pt]2. Introverts tend to dislike small talk.[/size]
If you really want to engage an introvert in conversation, skip the small talk. Introverts tend to love deep conversations on subjects that interest them. They love to debate, go past the superficial and poke around the depths in people’s minds to see what’s really going on in there. Most, if not all introverts tend to regard small talk as a waste of time, unless it’s with someone new they just met.

This characteristic probably contributes to another misconception that extroverts have of introverts - the misconception that all introverts are arrogant.Why? Because extroverts notice that introverts don’t talk that much with other people. Therefore, extroverts assume that introverts think they’re too good to talk to others, hence arrogant and that’s hardly the case. It’s just a matter of preference.
Extroverts thrive on small talk. Introverts abhor it. There’s nothing wrong with either choice, it’s just a matter of preference. This brings us to the third point.

[size=13pt]3. Introverts do like to socialize – only in a different manner and less frequently than extroverts.[/size]
Yes, it’s true. Contrary to the majority of public opinion, introverts do like to socialize, but again, only in a different manner and less frequently than extroverts.
Introverts love anything that involves deep conversation. They get energized by discussing subjects that are important to them and they love see what and how other people think, to connect the dots, to dig deep, to find root causes, to use logical thinking via debate in conversation, etc.
And what’s more, introverts can do a lot of things extroverts are naturally good at - give great speeches, schmooze with everyone, be the life of the party, charm the socks off of total strangers - but only for a short period of time. After that, they need time for themselves which brings us to the fourth point.

[size=13pt]4. Introverts need time alone to recharge.[/size]
Extroverts tend to think introverts have something against them as they constantly seem to refuse generous invites to social engagements. Introverts do appreciate the offers, but it’s just that they know it will take a lot of energy out of them if they pursue these social functions.
They need time alone like they need food and water. Give them their space. There’s nothing wrong with them. They’re not depressed and they’re not sad. They just need time alone to recharge their batteries.

[size=13pt]5. Introverts are socially well adjusted.[/size]
Most introverts are well aware of all the social nuances, customs, and mannerisms when it comes to interacting with other people, but they simply don’t choose to socialize as much as extroverts, which makes it easy for extroverts to assume that introverts are not socially well adjusted, as they have not seen much evidence of them interacting with other people. This just exacerbates previous misconceptions and gives way to labeling introverts as nerds, geeks, loners, etc.

It’s easy to understand why society tends to value extroverts over introverts. Human beings have lived in a tribal society so having to interact frequently with people came to be a regarded as a very good skill when it came to survival. But because of this high value placed on extroversion, introverts tend to feel trapped and find themselves in a catch 22 situation.

Do introverts stay true to who they are and risk social alienation and isolation or do introverts conform and join the extroverted side, pretending to be somebody they’re not just to fit in? This is precisely why I wrote this article, because if the extroverts can become more educated about introverts, introverts will be able to feel free to stay true to who they are, and that’s a good thing from society’s point of view. Trying to “turn” an introverted person into an extroverted person is detrimental because it gives off a subtle suggestion that there is something wrong with them, hampering their self worth and esteem when there is absolutely nothing wrong in the first place.
There’s nothing wrong with introverts. In fact, introverts are the leading pioneers of advancements in human civilization. Albert Einstein, Issac Newton, Charles Darwin are a few introverts that come to mind, just to name a few. And for those of you not interested in science, but pop culture, you’ll be surprised to see a lot of well known names in Hollywood are introverts as well. Julia Roberts, Steven Spielberg, Christian Bale to name a few as well.

And for those interested in sports, Michael Jordan and Tiger Woods come to mind as athletes who are introverts as well.

Introverts have a lot to bring to the table. They have an amazing ability to discover new thoughts, an uncanny ability to focus, to concentrate, to connect the dots, to observe and note things that most people miss, to listen extremely well and are often found having a rich and vivid imagination too.
The more extroverts become knowledgeable about introverts, the less tension and misunderstanding there will be among the two.
So if you’re an introvert reading this, send a copy of this article to all your extrovert friends so they can get a better idea of what you’re all about.
It’s time to finally clear the air.
Re: 5 Things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts by olu2013: 1:05pm On Jun 23, 2013
I am inbtw extrovert and introvert because i am a talkative to d people that i know wery well but to new people i play reserve. I don't attend party and u cant find me in a place dat will not benefit me. Finaly i dont like wasting my time on useless venture. In my residence people see me as a gentle man but in my office people see me as being lousy.
Re: 5 Things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts by Bolt3(m): 5:11am On Aug 28, 2014
Nice trend I am an extreme introvert because I like reading books and rearly speak. In my hihh school I spent 90% of my free time in the library as a result my friend thought I was weird and I believed them. As a result I hated myself and really thought I couldn't change.
Thank God I have accepted myself for who I am. I now know I am not abnormal however I make a conscious effort to cone of my confort zone as a result I am more social.
Re: 5 Things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts by Bolt3(m): 5:12am On Aug 28, 2014
Bolt3: Nice trend I am an extreme introvert because I like reading books and rearly speak. In my high school I spent 90% of my free time in the library as a result my friend thought I was weird and I believed them. As a result I hated myself and really thought I couldn't change.
Thank God I have accepted myself for who I am. I now know I am not abnormal however I make a conscious effort to come of my confort zone as a result I am more social.
Re: 5 Things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts by itstpia1: 5:25am On Aug 28, 2014
Kobojunkie:

There is a research out that suggests that the internet provides for introverted beings a world where they can freely express themselves and anonymously handle possible rejection that may follow.

i doubt introverts suddenly "become" extroverts on the web per se, imo, they may have had the extrovert trait prior to logging on. Individual personality types/traits outside these two main ones, tend to show more online, meaning its a different mode of analysis which should apply in addition to the regular introvert/extrovert findings.



in addition, I'm not sure an introvert would be bothered by "rejection" to the same extent an extrovert would be. The whole point of being an introvert is a reduced desire to socialize, and in actual fact, introverts, being analytical, probably experience just as much rejection of their views online as they do offline.


And there is the suggestion that a lot of the people who spend time in text chat rooms and forums are more introverts than extroverts. Extroverts spend more time on the phone, video chatting and going out.

thats an interesting observation, but extroverts also spend time in chat rooms and forums. I'd say a site like facebook however, has more extroverts than introverts.
Re: 5 Things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts by iceh2o(f): 1:20am On Sep 10, 2014
iice: Hmmm i'm an introvert but a weird one. undecided
anoda one here
Re: 5 Things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts by Hourglass4real: 3:47am On Sep 10, 2014
@Op this ur write up discribed me completely. My friends nd family don't seem to understand that I hav much fun reading in my room on weekends as those at some party.

Funny thing about me is that, I'm not evn shy,I can be social when I feel like buh will quickly get tired of d whole excitement. It's quite hard to convince an extrovert that you enjoy ur own company most times...

Imagine d trill of connecting d dots that most people miss so easily while u watch them at parties or occasional visits, having time to analyze body lnguages... reading a good book for relaxation...I wish my friends could see this,atleast it wil mak them understand me more. Lol
Re: 5 Things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts by Topboicute01(m): 9:17pm On Jul 10, 2020
There is an adage that says filled barrel dont make noise but the empty does... Am proud of been an introvert. wink

1 Like

Re: 5 Things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts by Kobojunkie: 11:22pm On Sep 21, 2021
People are certainly not exclusively introverted or extroverted. This is a common misconception. Psychologists have always argued for a degree of extroversion or introversion in individuals. In certain situations, an extrovert becomes an introvert, and in some others an introvert an extrovert. Jung, who proposed the theory of personality, made it quite clear that these are degrees of consciousness and not absolutes, but trust popular media to immediately render this common and gemein. I argue for better understanding undecided
In addition, the poster's mention of front- and back- brain activities as characteristic of introverts and extroverts respectively is not scientifically supported. There exists numerous, uncleared questions about it. . . .and it's only proper that he highlights this in his copy-and-paste action! angry
Precisely

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