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Stats: 1217075 members, 1597629 topics. Date: Tuesday, 11 March 2014 at 07:03 AM
|Re: Continue The (Lola) Story by Efemena_xy: 10:54pm On Mar 08, 2012|
It was all Lola could do to hold back the frustrating tears welling up behind her eyes. She had always been a strong advocate for self discipline and knew that she had definitely crossed the lines of acceptable behaviour today.
Deciding not to make an already bad situation worse, she decided not to pursue the matter further and accept the bitter pill of defeat. Well, she might as well be thankful for little mercies as the situation could have been a lot worse. At least this way, she would not have to contend with assult charges.
"Alright Ms Olatunji, you should receive my formal letter of apology to Mrs Amaka" Lola responded, as she got to her feet.
"Thank you" replied Ms Olatunji, as she stood up and showed Lola to the door. "I think it's better this way for everyone in the long run".
As Lola slowly walked back to the nursery to pick up her daughter, her mind was in turmoil. Today hadn't turned out like she expected it to. Just then, she heard the beeping SMS alert on her phone indicating that she had mail. "Now what?" she thought to herself.
Reaching inside her handbag, she dug out her phone from the depth of her bag. Her battery was on reserve. She had forgotten to charge her phone earlier in the day due to the excitement of getting to her interview on time.
Her interview. She had almost forgotten about that. What would be the outcome of it? How much longer would she keep looking for the elusive job that would ensure her independence from her parents? The perfect job that would ensure a better future for her and Sandra?
With her phone now in the palm of her hands, she opened up her email and saw it was from Mrs Omojobi-Clarke. Gosh! that was quick, what do they want? Once again, she felt the all too familiar dryness in her mouth as she opened up the email. Just then her phone went off!
"Oh blast!" She quietly cursed under her breadth. Now she'd have to wait till she got home to charge her phone to find out what the contents of the email were. If she was lucky, there might be power supply at her parents - assuming PHCN wasn't up to its usual tricks. Looking at her watch, it was way past the closing time for any of the nearby cybercafes to check her mail either. Lola sighed in frustration.
|Re: Continue The (Lola) Story by maclatunji: 11:39pm On Mar 08, 2012|
As they walked towards the gate of the school, the school guard, Sumonu beamed a smile at mother and daughter. Rubbing his head and smiling sheepishly, he said to Lola, "madam u don dey go? Okaaay, Sandra na bery good girl, she no dey flay rup, me I dey see am dey flay by Ah-selp."
Lola immediately knew what Sumonu's niceties were all about and felt humiliated by the fact that she wouldn't be able to give Sumonu the tip that his short drama was expected to produce.
She smiled at him and said, "next time I come Sumonu, I no get change." Lola felt a little bit guilty that she was lying, especially in the presence of her daughter. The truth was that she only had enough money to pay for their bus ride home, not a kobo more. Of course, Sandra was oblivious to this fact but that did not mitigate her mother's sense of guilt.
Sumonu realised that he was not going to get any tip this time and quietly moved to open the gate, "byebye madam, byebye Sandra, sea u tumorerow" he said as they walked passed him hand-in-hand.
|Re: Continue The (Lola) Story by wisemen045(m): 8:36pm On Mar 09, 2012|
Lola was stunned beyond words by Ms. Olatunji’s firm decision. She sat transfixed for a while and gradually recomposed herself to utter some words of apology. No sensible words left her mouth that had turned suddenly dry. ….’I’m sorry; so sorry ma’’ was all she could mumble. Your apology would be considered in writing retorted Ms. Olatunji as she dismissed Lola; pointing at the same time to the heavy oak door. Lola took hold of Sandra’s hand and walked out of Ms. Olatunji’s office in great thought. The least thought on her mind was the apology letter she had been mandated to write by her daughter’s school headmistress. I need to get that job she told herself. A smile crossed her sweaty face as she remembered that her performance at the interview had been great. She briefly recollected how Mr. Clarke watched her intently. She knew she would get the job. And she smiled again; this time the smile turned into laughter. Sandra couldn’t help noticing her mother was in a lighter mood. She smiled too and asked ‘’mummy, I am still celebrating my birthday?’’. ‘’se my cake will be bigger than Bayo’s cake, ehn mummy?’’ Yes my dear. Mummy would buy you a big cake when she gets a new job.
Somewhere in their lush residence in Dolphin estate, the Clarkes were busy sorting through the assessment sheets of the interviewees for the day. Honey, what’s your opinion on that Lola lady Mr. Clarke asked his wife. Hmm… Ms. Jane Omojobi Clarke sighed. Honey, you are so predictable. I knew you would ask about her. I watched as you listened to her talk in rapt attention. She is quite good. I am considering her for the final two who would come for a week of probation. I am sending the text messages this evening.
|Re: Continue The (Lola) Story by maclatunji: 9:51pm On Mar 09, 2012|
^Why are you going back bro.? I and Efemena had passed Ms. Olatunji's office now.
|Re: Continue The (Lola) Story by adebayo201(m): 10:26pm On Mar 09, 2012|
show! una don go far oh.
|Re: Continue The (Lola) Story by wisemen045(m): 10:33am On Mar 10, 2012|
Quite sorry. I wrote it at my spare time based on your earlier submission where the headteacher had Lola discharged from her office. Sincerely, I didn't realise yourself and Efemena had added two more posts. You guys are quite prolific.
Do accept my apology. And, my submission wasn't completely off. Read it well please. It can be merged with your post and that of Efemena. The story line is still intact.
I believe all contributors come here to sharpen their writting skills; your stern rebuttals and retorts have the capacity to discourage contributions. Not everybody writes as well as you do; let people make mistakes and learn from them. Do be more flexible. This is a forum my brother ooo.
My two kobos all through.
|Re: Continue The (Lola) Story by maclatunji: 1:02pm On Mar 10, 2012|
Don't mind me, I think I should stop being eerrrr what's the word? A mixture of being competitive + ambitious. I tend to like excellence for anything I am involved in. I was hoping you would modify your post to follow logically from where I stopped. You obviously have the capacity to do so.
No offence meant to you guys, but we can learn by just reading a lot more before trying to write. I just got a great idea from this.
|Re: Continue The (Lola) Story by adebayo201(m): 6:07pm On Mar 10, 2012|
|Re: Continue The (Lola) Story by lola.luv(f): 11:53pm On Mar 11, 2012|
The heroine shares my name! Okies!!
|Re: Continue The (Lola) Story by maclatunji: 1:51pm On Mar 12, 2012|
Is that all you got for us?
|Re: Continue The (Lola) Story by lola.luv(f): 9:19am On Mar 15, 2012|
Yes oh! Right now I'm a learning spectator/fan! I'll join you guys sometime soon. But first, I want to see the direction the story is taking...lol.
|Re: Continue The (Lola) Story by Efemena_xy: 6:18pm On Mar 16, 2012|
The journey home from her daughter’s nursery had been uneventful although Lola was grateful for Sandra’s constant chatter about her everyday activities, as this kept her from dwelling too much on her own pressing issues. There had been a long queue at the bus stop as the never ending sea of anxious faces of commuters struggled to get home during the evening rush hour. Five buses later, amidst the tight squeeze of being sandwiched between two hefty ladies, Lola finally managed to get a seat with her daughter placed firmly on her lap in the rickety old bus. During the bumpy ride home, she mentally went over the day’s activities whilst half listening to her two year old daughter.
“Madam oya pay come” the bus conductor asked, arms outstretched to her as they approached her final destination. Lola reached for her purse and paid her bus fare to the conductor as requested. That was all the money she had in the world and not a Kobo left. She grimaced ruefully at the thought of having to “borrow” some more money from her mother again. But what choice did she have? She couldn’t bear to bring herself to ask her father for financial aid as he had reiterated for the millionth time that she should consider herself lucky at her age, to be able to live under his roof rent free whilst making no contributions to feeding either…
Later on that evening having given an exuberant Sandra her dinner, a bath and eventually settling her in bed (after reading her favourite Teletubbies story to her for the third time), an exhausted Lola finally slumped tiredly into the armchair in her parents' living room. Her daughter had been overly excited at the thought of having a birthday cake larger than her cousin’s Bayo and had seemingly forgotten all about the upheaval at her school earlier in the day. “Oh the joys of being a child once again”, a bemused Lola thought to herself. “Free from the everyday hustle and bustle of simply trying to keep one’s head financially above the deep waters…”
She was in deep thought and hadn’t heard her mother come into the candlelit living room whilst she stared blankly at the wall. “How did your day go my dear?” asked her mother.
“Hmm?” Lola turned towards her mother. “Oh, it was okay” she responded. “I had an interview earlier today and it looks like I’ve got some feedback, but I don’t know exactly what it is yet.”
“Oh? How do you mean?” her mother queried. She was a tall dark skinned woman who like Lola would rather deal with life’s uncertainties stoically than perceive to be a burden to her family. Nevertheless, being a mother, she didn’t miss the small frown that crossed over Lola’s face and knew her daughter was holding back something.
“Well, I did receive an email from my interviewers but wasn’t able to access it as my battery went flat out on me” she sighed. “I’m just waiting for the power to be restored so I can charge up my phone, then I’ll know for sure if I was successful today or not.” She continued.
“I see” replied her mother. “Why don’t you go over to the Adeosuns’? I’m sure Mama Bisi wouldn’t mind if you charged your phone at theirs or better still, if you asked to use Bisi’s laptop to check your mail?”
“No, I don’t think that would be necessary mum.” Lola firmly responded. She remembered all too clearly what happened the last time she went over to Bisi’s for a similar request. Neither Bisi nor her mum had been home then except for Mr. Adeosun. Lola had barely been able to restrain the urge not to smack the leery look from his face as he had ogled at her, assuming she was there for the picking.
|Re: Continue The (Lola) Story by fellis(f): 12:11am On Mar 17, 2012|
Of course she had only wanted to smack the leery look off his face because Mr Adeosun had not had the decency to even do as little as buying her glo 500naira recharge card before asking her to sleep with his old @rse. For the love of peace, what was he thinking? That she was going to put out for him without getting something first? Hmmm! Fat chance.
Anyway, presently Lola's thoughts quickly returned to her surroundings and she turned to hear what her mother had started saying when she had drifted off in thought.
|Re: Continue The (Lola) Story by Efemena_xy: 11:32pm On Mar 19, 2012|
someone continue the story pls. . . Maclatunji? Wisemen045?
|Re: Continue The (Lola) Story by Nickydrake(m): 8:43am On Mar 20, 2012|
I was gonna write something, but fellis just kicked the zeal outta me with that annoying piece of heroine-demeaning prose.
|Re: Continue The (Lola) Story by maclatunji: 10:46am On Mar 20, 2012|
Efemena_xy: The journey home from her daughter’s nursery had been uneventful although Lola was grateful for her daughter’s constant chatter about her everyday activities, as this kept her from dwelling too much on her own pressing issues. There had been a long queue at the bus stop as the never ending sea of anxious faces of commuters struggled to get home during the evening rush hour. Five buses later, amidst the tight squeeze of being sandwiched between two hefty ladies, Lola finally managed to get a seat with her daughter placed firmly on her lap in the rickety old bus. During the bumpy ride home, she mentally went over the day’s activities whilst half listening to her two year old daughter.
Uche drove his maroon Range Rover Sport into the driveway of his 5 bedroom detached house in Lekki Phase I, he parked it at the front of the swimming pool like he always did. He just couldn't get himself to park the car elsewhere although he had a garage that could house 5 cars without a hitch, it had become an habit that he couldn't kick. He waved non-chalantly at Hassan his mai-guard and walked slowly to the front door of the house as if intoxicated, he wasn't drunk but was on the verge of collapse from pure exhaustion.
He pressed the front door knob and found that the door was open, he walked in and could hear the all-too-familiar sound of a Nigerian movie on the Naija Magic cable channel. Watching the movie with rapt attention in the luxuriously furnished living room was a woman in her late twenties who for all intent and purposes could be mistaken as a super-model. She had long slender almost fragile legs, was endowed with an oval but extremely pretty face and long natural hair. She was just under six feet in terms of height and had a very fair complexion and soft smooth skin. In fact, most people mistook her for a mixed-race woman which she wasn't.
She turned on the black pure leather sofa at Uche and starred at him with indifference returning her gaze to the movie. "Amaka, is that how you greet your husband after a hard day's work?" Uche barked!
|Re: Continue The (Lola) Story by maclatunji: 10:49am On Mar 20, 2012|
Nickydrake: I was gonna write something, but fellis just kicked the zeal outta me with that annoying piece of heroine-demeaning prose.
I think if anybody writes rubbish, you can just ignore it and continue from the place that the last sensible post was made by quoting it.
|Re: Continue The (Lola) Story by Nickydrake(m): 1:32pm On Mar 20, 2012|
Yeah, i saw what you did there; really neat. Cue is taken.
I couldn't help noticing certain spelling errors in your recent post, and seeing as you have rightly affirmed yourself that the purpose of the thread is to hone our skills and woo perfection, i feel i should draw them to your attention.
You wrote "raft" when i believe you meant "rapt". And "great" where again i think you had "greet" in mind.
I'm absolutely certain that the mistakes were merely the result of an absent mind, and i sincerely hope i have not made myself seem pedantic and presumptuous.
|Re: Continue The (Lola) Story by maclatunji: 1:48pm On Mar 20, 2012|
Nickydrake: Yeah, i saw what you did there; really neat. Cue is taken.
Thank you for pointing-out the errors, edited.
Inasmuch as I like to think I can multitask, the errors just keep showing-up from time to time. I had noticed a few that I also corrected (in the same post) earlier. Pointing out errors is cool, what I don't like is people spoiling the story when they realize that their writing skills do not match what is currently available on the thread.
I encourage people to be active readers before trying to be writers.
|Re: Continue The (Lola) Story by Nickydrake(m): 2:23pm On Mar 20, 2012|
what I don't like is people
Couldn't agree more.
|Re: Continue The (Lola) Story by Efemena_xy: 4:34pm On Mar 22, 2012|
Amaka seethed inwardly with resentment at her husband's display of aggression towards her. After the day she had had at work - being subjected to an unprovoked attack from a parent - she really could do with a little bit more civility from him.
She and Uche were approaching their third wedding anniversary and compared to many of their friends and acquaintances, they were by far much more well-to-do financially. The only speck of imperfection in their otherwise perfect marriage was the absence of any children to bless the union. Oh how she longed to fill her home with the patter of tiny feet! Although Uche had been very understanding and supportive of their plight initially, she could sense that the constant pressure from extended family members was wearing him down and as the years rolled by, he became less understanding and more uptight with her. She always noticed, with a sharp searing pain through her heart - how gently, how patiently he interacted with his young nieces and nephews whenever they came visiting.
That was why taking up the job of nursery assistant at Ms Olatunji's posh Little Angels Nursery School had seemed like a welcome diversion from her predicament. Not that she needed the money at all, but it was something to pre-occupy her mind with, a reason to get up in the mornings and hopefully, an opportunity to gain some experience in child-minding pending when she eventually, hopefully had her own baby.
|Re: Continue The (Lola) Story by wisemen045(m): 8:36pm On Mar 23, 2012|
Efemena_xy: Amaka seethed inwardly with resentment at her husband's display of aggression towards her. After the day she had had at work - being subjected to an unprovoked attack from a parent - she really could do with a little bit more civility from him.
......……..A baby that may be coming soon she muttered as she collected herself from the sofa and made towards the kitchen; it was Friday night and Amaka had made thick ‘akpu’ with ‘ofe onugbu’ for Uche in the hope that she could placate Uche who since their major fight in March had withdrawn from Amaka. A little smile crossed her face as she dwelt on the possibility of being intimate with Uche. She had her hopes high and the timing was perfect. She just ovulated and being guided by the words of Dr. Eno she knew that the chance of getting pregnant was great. Amaka placed Uche’s dinner in the microwave and set the timer for two minutes.
Lola, still very anxious about her performance in the interview, took a deep breath, weighed the options in her mind and realising that she had no better choice stood up, paced round the living room and concluded that she should try the Adedayo's, the Adedayo's over the years had gathered a reputation for being unfriendly. ‘’Knock, knock, knock’’, who is there; came the soft feminine voice from the Adedayo's living room. Emi ni mummy; Lola chorused. Emm, Mummy. Ehn, ehn I want to charge my phone Ma.
|Re: Continue The (Lola) Story by Efemena_xy: 8:55am On Mar 24, 2012|
@Wisemen045 thanks for your contribution. A couple of comments if you don't mind:
1. Although the general consensus here is to ensure the storyline flows seamlessly, there still needs to be a distinction between each writer's contribution. I see that you've inserted your write-up within my quotation. Pls amend this as each of us have our own individual / unique style of writing and these should be reflected and appreciated accordingly. This may have been an unintended mistake on your part and all you need to do is simply place your writeup after the closing [/quote] tag.
2. The story is completely fictitious so there was no need to include my name (Efemena) in there as the doctor. Would appreciate it if you could pls amend this accordingly.
3. If you look closely at my last post concerning the character Lola, she was determined not to go over to the Adeosun's for reasons stated earlier.
Thanks & I hope you view this in the spirit it's intended...
|Re: Continue The (Lola) Story by wisemen045(m): 10:22am On Mar 24, 2012|
Efemena_xy: @Wisemen045 thanks for your contribution. A couple of comments if you don't mind:
@Efemena. Please pardon me. No offence meant. Felt I should catch some fun along the way. The change has been made and the post modified accordingly. The character has been renamed Dr. Eno.
Really do appreciate your kind understanding. You may not know this but this thread is helping some people to overcome the fear of writing. Please, keep the advice coming. Let people post while the very good ones on the thread suggest the necessary amendments to their posts. We can make it fun. I do appreciate your civility. Hoping to read your next post (s).
|Re: Continue The (Lola) Story by Efemena_xy: 7:32pm On Apr 03, 2012|
Amaka was deep in thought and did not hear her husband enter the kitchen.
"What's for dinner?" he asked.
She turned round to find Uche lounging nonchalantly against the wall, studying her intently - A bit too intently for her comfort. "Your favourite" she responded, turning back to the microwave. She could feel his gaze poring into the small of her back, watching her every move. "How did your day go at work?" She asked, anything to diffuse the growing tension.
"My day..." he drawled "...was fruitful"
|Re: Continue The (Lola) Story by Fyn gal(f): 1:27am On Apr 08, 2012|
Amaka swallowed hard. 'Fruitful' was not a word in Uche's usual vocabulary. She turned and looked at him searchingly but his face was unreadable. What did he mean by 'fruitful'? A small knot of fear twisted in her stomach as she replied with a forced cheerfulness '' oh! That's great news . I can't wait to hear about it''
Uche smiled in a mysterious way. "i'm very hungry" he said over his shoulder as he strolled lazily out of the kitchen.
Amaka stood staring at the door, trying to calm her nerves; her heart threatening to spin out of control as she recalled something Ngozi, Uche's sister had told her recently: "marriage is like a race and every one in it tries to stay on the track, not only so they can run to the end, but also, to emerge as a winner. As it is now, you are almost off the track."
Was Ngozi's statement a veiled warning? Or a message? Could it be......?
No! Amaka forced the thoughts out of her mind and tried on focus on the present. Tonight was seduction night and she would not allow anything distract her.
Lola waited in exasperation. It had been almost two minutes since she had stated her name and mission, yet no one emerged from the adedayo's home, neither did she receive permission to enter.
|Re: Continue The (Lola) Story by Amaka G29(f): 2:29pm On Apr 10, 2012|
The thing is I'm so in love with this story I'm scared to contribute and ruin it. You guys are great.
|Re: Continue The (Lola) Story by maclatunji: 4:13pm On Apr 10, 2012|
Fyn gal: Amaka swallowed hard. 'Fruitful' was not a word in Uche's usual vocabulary. She turned and looked at him searchingly but his face was unreadable. What did he mean by 'fruitful'? A small knot of fear twisted in her stomach as she replied with a forced cheerfulness '' oh! That's great news . I can't wait to hear about it''
She had decided against trying her luck with the Adeosuns because she really hated Mr. Adeosun with his ogling eyes which she knew always stripped her unclad whenever he saw her. Yet, the sense of expectation from her interview that now occupied her mind would not let her wait for the Power Holding Company of Nigeria (PHCN) to restore electricity to her area by midnight as they usually did. Hence, she decided to cross the street and charge her phone at the Adedayos' residence. The Adedayos were a close-knit family comprising of Chief Adedayo who was the head of the Amuludun Community Development Association (CDA). Amuludun was the outskirt of Lagos where Lola and her parents lived. Mrs. Adedayo was a popular grocery seller at Ojuwoye market and was a force to be reckoned with within the community especially when political issues were up for consideration. The couple had a daughter, Shade who was a year older than Lola, they had both attended Amuludun Secondary School together and graduated from the same class five years ago. However, the duo had drifted apart based on their different outlooks to life; Shade was a classic city girl who had little or no reservations when it came to men, drugs and alcohol whilst Lola had always been a model young woman in terms of character except for her 10-minutes of indiscretion which now traumatized her like a terminal disease wherever she went. She remembered the day she met Kingsley...
|Re: Continue The (Lola) Story by wisemen045(m): 8:31pm On Apr 10, 2012|
@Maclatunji, Lola’s ex-boyfriend had been established as ‘’Kingsley’’ and not ‘’Uche’’. Please, modify your last sentence to ‘’....she remembered the day she met Kingsley......’’.
|Re: Continue The (Lola) Story by wisemen045(m): 8:36pm On Apr 10, 2012|
Kingsley had been the reason Lola dropped out of school after her OND. She almost didn’t complete the diploma programme due to the severe complications she developed during pregnancy. ‘’It was all worth it’’ she told herself as she remembered the first time she saw Sandra in the incubator. ‘’It was all worth it’’ she said again. Sandra was a carbon copy of Kingsley and would have passed as his clone if not that Sandra was a girl. ‘’Oh Kingsley’’ she muttered as she recalled how Kingsley’s deft hands had sent sensual shivers down her spine the first night of their tryst at Kingsley’s single room apartment ‘’off K’’ as off campus students’ accommodations were known. It turned out to be a long night for Lola; the night she lost her virtue. And now, jobless with just the OND to hold on to as her ticket to a better tomorrow, she wondered if she hadn’t lost it all.
It was 10 PM and the Adedayos , who normally were late sleepers, were getting ready to go to bed. ‘’Shade, Shade, Shade’’, Chief Adedayo bellowed from the bedroom. ‘’Petrol doesn’t fall from heaven ooooo; put off that ‘’gen’’ now’’ Chief Adedayo said to a surprised Shade who was unaccustomed to her father demanding that the ‘’I better pass my neighbour’’ generator be put off at that early hour.
|Re: Continue The (Lola) Story by mykhel995: 8:52pm On Apr 10, 2012|
Then, the explosion rocked the house, leaving a disturbing orange-pink mist in the air. It happened so fast that Shade felt no pain as his body disintegrated. As Chief Adedayo ran instinctively towards the building where the generator was housed, he took no notice of the mist. He unwittingly inhaled bits of Shade as he went towards the site of the explosion.
Then, he saw it, a gold lighter. It was one he hadn't seen before. the explosion was not an accident. the lighter was expected to be found.
He collapsed as the realization hit him. Only now did he notice the unmistakable smell of blood and charred flesh.
|Re: Continue The (Lola) Story by maclatunji: 8:54am On Apr 11, 2012|
Kindly change that to her.
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