Earlier this week one of my male friends whom known him for about 7 years told me he has feelings for me and isn't sure if he can continue being friends or even speaking to me because of it. I'm in a relationship and he said he respects my bf but its hard to talk and hang out with me and suppress his feelings. It just makes me wonder about all the times he and I spent together and things that I've said or done could've been seen as being flirty instead of just friendly or playful. And it makes a lot of sense because when he did have a gf she didn't like me and accused me of sleeping with him. Its not like I never suspected him to have a crush I just thought he got over it. If a guy likes me and doesn't do anything about it after a short period of time he is forever in the friend zone.

I just always pictured him as being around for a while and like one of the guys I would invite to my wedding someday. I obviously can't tell my bf about this because he would just tell me to drop him but what should I do? How should I change my interactions with him?

Just tell him you are in a relationship and that you love your bf and that he should try and keep you off his mind .

Talk 2 him maturely and mk him undastand u cherish hs frndship_evr frndship must nt graduate into a relationship,n if he stil dosnt see ur reasons,alow hm 2 go,u cant force sm1 2 be ur frnd

Remain friends with him & let him knw U̶̲̥̅̊ HªvΣ A̶̲̥̅ bf. If he Ȋ̝̊̅§ A̶̲̥̅ matured guy, he'll understand. Dnt treat him anyhow cos U̶̲̥̅̊ aя̩̥̊ε̲̣̣̣̥ nt married τ̅☺ Ūя̲̅ bf yet, accordin τ̅☺ ASA_ ₪O one knows tomoro.

Let ur frnd go, e'l def com around somday. Gues it js dawned on him dat u both wer perfect pair, his bad! But y do I get d feelin dat if u wer stil single u wud v said yes 2 him?

Homar: Just tell him you are in a relationship and that you love your bf and that he should try and keep you off his mind .

He knows. At first I just thought it was because he wasn't dating or having sex with anyone but he is, and he is still thinking about me. I told him that I appreciate our friendship and if he wants to end it that's up to him. He can do whatever he needs to do to give him peace of mind.

Its also strange cuz right now he knows my bf is out of the country for a few months so I think he is trying to use it to his advantage to move in.

cowgurl: Let ur frnd go, e'l def com around somday. Gues it js dawned on him dat u both wer perfect pair, his bad! But y do I get d feelin dat if u wer stil single u wud v said yes 2 him?

There was a time, maybe 3 years ago, when he and I were both single when something could've occurred but too much has happened since then. Sometimes you learn too much about a person that puts you off.

Jenams: Remain friends with him & let him knw U̶̲̥̅̊ HªvΣ A̶̲̥̅ bf. If he Ȋ̝̊̅§ A̶̲̥̅ matured guy, he'll understand. Dnt treat him anyhow cos U̶̲̥̅̊ Α̲̅я̩̥̊ε̲̣̣̣̥ nt married τ̅☺ Ūя̲̅ bf yet, accordin τ̅☺ ASA_ ₪O one knows tomoro.

Ah haha I guess I'll just try to be as normal as possible but I don't want to be with my friend. Whether I was single or not. He has many issues when it comes to relationships as well as I'm not physically attracted to him.

you guys CANNOT be friends any longer.....if you do then he will cross the line. out of respect for your R7ship, you guys cannot be friends any longer.

MRbrownJAY: you guys CANNOT be friends any longer.....if you do then he will cross the line. out of respect for your R7ship, you guys cannot be friends any longer.

im just starting to be close with him. like within the past yr. its just frustrating that it will most likely end

^^ if this was your BF in the same situation, how would you have liked him to solve this issue?

MRbrownJAY: ^^ if this was your BF in the same situation, how would you have liked him to solve this issue?

my bf actually is in a similar issue. He doesn't know that I know about that tho. I have no other choice but to trust him, he is going to do whatever he wants no matter what I say. A longtime female friend of has a crush on him, altho she lives in another state it still makes it uneasy for me to know this.

hmm I would like him to distance himself from her. I wouldn't say he would have to end the friendship though but perhaps change it up a little bit. More events with the three of us instead of just the two of them. Also I would tell him to mention me in a positive light more often. Sometimes friends like to vent to other friends about problems in their relationship and it may make the friend think they are unhappy when really they are just frustrated momentarily. Restrictions on contact [like no calling at all times of the day and night]. I'm not going to tell him unless he asks for my advice, he knows what I think is disrespectful and what I think crosses the parameters of our relationship.

I tell him he has no reason to worry and he tells me that his feelings for me won't change.

Fine! Let him be!

Or else, believe u me, u'll be surprised wakin up one mornin with him by urside, and keep wonderin and ponderin how it happened.

Speakin from expirience.

Ranoscky: Fine! Let him be!

Or else, believe u me, u'll be surprised wakin up one mornin with him by urside, and keep wonderin and ponderin how it happened.

Speakin from expirience.

My life would have to hit some serious lows in order for that to happen

update: got a second phone number that I wont give him
blocked from all other communication
last time we spoke I only ask how his grandma was doing (she was in the hospital) and he asked when he and I were going to hang out again
he invited to his graduation in a few weeks so I believe that will be the last time I see him.

Interesting. First thread I've read here.

Well, you should know that not all guys know how to handle the 'friend zone'. From your post, it seems you actually do have a soft spot for him. Right?

MrCyberRanks: Interesting. First thread I've read here.

Well, you should know that not all guys know how to handle the 'friend zone'. From your post, it seems you actually do have a soft spot for him. Right?

I know not all guys can handle it, I just thought after 7 years he would've been ok with being friends. I have a soft spot for all my friends. It just feels like every couple of months, some friendship is ending for some reason unbeknownst to me. I take my friendships seriously because I don't think friends are easy to come by.

KateSpade: update: got a second phone number that I wont give him
blocked from all other communication
last time we spoke I only ask how his grandma was doing (she was in the hospital) and he asked when he and I were going to hang out again
he invited to his graduation in a few weeks so I believe that will be the last time I see him.

U got ursef a new digits? I don't tink dat was necessary, so wat happens if e gets a hold of it, r u stil gonna kip changin nos? U'v alredi told him u not interested so stick 2 dat script yle makin him undastand u value d frndship u both shared, a tym wil def com wen e'l let u b (mayb wen e sees ur weddin IV).

KateSpade: update: got a second phone number that I wont give him
blocked from all other communication
last time we spoke I only ask how his grandma was doing (she was in the hospital) and he asked when he and I were going to hang out again
he invited to his graduation in a few weeks so I believe that will be the last time I see him.

Aww. Seems you're handling the situation well then.

@cowgurl

I didn't get a new phone number for him, for other reasons. Im just gonna keep my distance.

Aite Kate, gudluck 2 u.

KateSpade:

My life would have to hit some serious lows in order for that to happen

Ok o! Wish u the best.