There is a serious issue in Nigeria which is really getting worse. Married couples are supposed to be partners but nooooooooo! Instead, a wife working and making money on her own, ties her money to herself while she believes her husband's money belongs to her. Even in cases where the wife is making more money than her husband, she still expects her husband to feed and pay all the bills in the house including her own bills.

Some wives will even wait till their husbands get back from travels before collecting money for feeding the children while the ones they made on their own are pocketed. Situations where some wives buy properties or cars in their own names while their husbands buy properties with their names like Mr Jude & Mrs Princess Okere for property title documents but same can't be said of most 9ja women.

The best you will get from most 9ja women is borrowing which always leads to fight and insults if the husband failed to return it on time.

Now my question is - is this fair to guys or husbands in this society? Why will a woman pocket her own interest funds while she spends the token her hubby makes claiming her money is hers while his money is theirs? What the hell is the meaning of this? Smells like day light scamming....

Guys, is this fair enough? Your wife spending from your money while she keeps hers without even letting you smell it?
Ladies, can your money be shared between you and your husband's equally like men do their wives (note I said husband not boy friend)?
Ladies again , if you are making money more than your hubby, will you be kind enough to relieve him of some major burdens in home expenses without collecting it back claiming that you only borrowed it to him e.g. paying house rent without asking back even if he's not that broke?


Marriage is supposed to be a partnership thing, to show love and support not a choking life decision. What do you think?

bump [img]http://www.50centloseweight.com[/img]

I have been laughing since I read this article . The quote below made me ROTFL

Now my question is - is this fair to guys or husbands in this society? Why will a woman pocket her own interest funds while she spends the token her hubby makes claiming her money is hers while his money is theirs? What the hell is the meaning of this? Smells like day light scamming..

I pity the man who marries such a wife. It shows the lack of maturity in the woman. It shows a lack of understanding of building a family up. However if the man is a useless braggart who doesn't know how to spend money well and frugally - then I do not blame the woman.

jennykadry: There is a serious issue in Nigeria which is really getting worse. Married couples are supposed to be partners but nooooooooo! Instead, a wife working and making money on her own, ties her money to herself while she believes her husband's money belongs to her. Even in cases where the wife is making more money than her husband, she still expects her husband to feed and pay all the bills in the house including her own bills.

Some wives will even wait till their husbands get back from travels before collecting money for feeding the children while the ones they made on their own are pocketed. Situations where some wives buy properties or cars in their own names while their husbands buy properties with their names like Mr Jude & Mrs Princess Okere for property title documents but same can't be said of most 9ja women.

The best you will get from most 9ja women is borrowing which always leads to fight and insults if the husband failed to return it on time.

Now my question is - is this fair to guys or husbands in this society? Why will a woman pocket her own interest funds while she spends the token her hubby makes claiming her money is hers while his money is theirs? What the hell is the meaning of this? Smells like day light scamming....

Guys, is this fair enough? Your wife spending from your money while she keeps hers without even letting you smell it?
Ladies, can your money be shared between you and your husband's equally like men do their wives (note I said husband not boy friend)?
Ladies again , if you are making money more than your hubby, will you be kind enough to relieve him of some major burdens in home expenses without collecting it back claiming that you only borrowed it to him e.g. paying house rent without asking back even if he's not that broke?


Marriage is supposed to be a partnership thing, to show love and support not a choking life decision. What do you think?

The things I can complain about are if she hides the fact that she has money from me and spends it on things that I consider detrimental to myself and our children. Outside of that, it is her money and not mine while I as a husband have certain basic standards to meet in terms of feeding, clothing and shelter. Yes, we live in hard times but if you as a man have the mind that it is your responsibility to do these things, God opens doors. I am obviously not married but I just get amazed at the way God opens doors when I decide I want to be responsible for something even when I had no money at the time of taking that decision.

If you as a man want to rely on your wife's resources then you limit your progress and sell your dignity as well. Don't get me wrong, if she wants to be supportive and help out, I have no problem with that. However, it should never[/b]cross my mind that [b]she must give me part of her money/wealth at any point in time.

It all comes out in the wash at the very end. She might think she's being clever by hiding money but the husband knows. He might pretend not to notice it because he knows she will eventually spend all of that money on the family, it's just a matter of time. Women tend to hoard money when they feel insecure in a marriage (the money they hide is a back-up plan in case the marriage falls apart). But think about it, if the marriage stands strong with time, where is the wife going to go with all the money? Will she run away after she has saved enough or donate it to charity? Will she buy another house for herself and the children to live in? I doubt it! Once such women get comfortable and confident in the marriage, they open the bullion van and spend it all!!!! A wise man knows this and just waits; he considers his wife's hoarding as family savings for future emergencies because a marriage commitment is forever and we don't spend money in the after life.

jennykadry: There is a serious issue in Nigeria which is really getting worse. Married couples are supposed to be partners but nooooooooo! Instead, a wife working and making money on her own, ties her money to herself while she believes her husband's money belongs to her. Even in cases where the wife is making more money than her husband, she still expects her husband to feed and pay all the bills in the house including her own bills.

Some wives will even wait till their husbands get back from travels before collecting money for feeding the children while the ones they made on their own are pocketed. Situations where some wives buy properties or cars in their own names while their husbands buy properties with their names like Mr Jude & Mrs Princess Okere for property title documents but same can't be said of most 9ja women.

The best you will get from most 9ja women is borrowing which always leads to fight and insults if the husband failed to return it on time.

Now my question is - is this fair to guys or husbands in this society? Why will a woman pocket her own interest funds while she spends the token her hubby makes claiming her money is hers while his money is theirs? What the hell is the meaning of this? Smells like day light scamming....

Guys, is this fair enough? Your wife spending from your money while she keeps hers without even letting you smell it?
Ladies, can your money be shared between you and your husband's equally like men do their wives (note I said husband not boy friend)?
Ladies again , if you are making money more than your hubby, will you be kind enough to relieve him of some major burdens in home expenses without collecting it back claiming that you only borrowed it to him e.g. paying house rent without asking back even if he's not that broke?


Marriage is supposed to be a partnership thing, to show love and support not a choking life decision. What do you think?

madam jenny,everything u av said here is 150% true. It happens alot in nija though i cant say abt oda countries. Well i used to think a wife dat does such probably does it cos her hubby is stingy towards her. And some do to save up for d future dats y atimes wen d husbands get broke,u find out d wife foot bills n upkeep of d family n d husband is always apreciative.

I believe the husband's role is to provide for his family but whatever money I make he should be aware of it. However, when things are hard it is partly my responsibility to help out in any way I can, If its to help out with foodstuff and other things to give him peace of mind to focus on getting back up and paying other major expenses. If he needs my help then why not, is it not for us? I will NEVER ask for the money back, if he insists on paying back when things get better, then fine (personally I feel its insulting to ask for the money). I am not doing him a favour.
This is what works for me, I don't know about others.

I don't think they do it consciously,except in cases where the husband may not be financially responsible.And men most times by default assume the role of the sole provider and never demand for the wive's money.But things are changing now,Naija guys in this generation carry our ladies for mind.

But this is very common.I was discussing money issues with my EX once,and her response about the financial responsibility of a husband led me to ask her what women do with their money.

Everything boils down to communication and mutual understanding.

While the home is a partnership, my husband is going to want to feel like the primary contributor. We can split expenses 50-50 if we have comparable jobs, but any extra money I make, I intend to keep separately to save for retirement, my children, investment. I don't planning on hiding the fact that I have money put away, but I don't expect to be asked to sacrifice it for any reason. Women have traditionally been placed at extreme social and economic disadvantages.

Especially with the short life of some marriages these days, separate funds are a matter of prudence and good planning. The way some men run off with younger women? You can leave me brokenhearted but you won't leave me broke. Also, sometimes good people fall into bad things in a way that if all of the money is together one spouse may ruin the household finances: an addiction, a bad investment, a scam...

The point is partners have a responsibility for each other and should help each other, but that does not mean that all individual interest dissolve.

This money issue, is what is still causing misunderstandings between my dad and mum, my dad feels he needs to know the in and out of my mum's money and she is like; No!!! you can't know what i earn and how i spend my money.

That is their own wahala, i don't hide what i earn from my hubby, he knows how i spend my money and not that he cares a bit, at least when it comes to money, we are open to eachother, that will be '-1' of marital problems.

I do not think any woman should hide her earnings from her hubby,only for reasons that might affect their pockets, example, if the guy is a compulsive gambler, a drunk, a sex addict (who loves to visit brotels), and so on and so forth, apart from these reasons, i really do not see any other reason a woman will be financially stingy to her hubby.

I had a friend who lost her boyfriend over a pack of cornflakes,can you believe that? the guy came over to her place and wanted to have some, and she lied to him that it was mine, as God would have it, i was actually going to her room at the same time she said no to that guy, on getting there, the guy asked me if he could drink some, (meanwhile my friend was stepping on me) and i innocently removed my feet and said the cornflakes was not mine but hers' and i was looking at her, like 'why would you say it was mine, the guy got up and never came back, who knows if he was just testing her. Well, i felt bad afterwards, not for me though, but for her.

ronkebp: This money issue, is what is still causing misunderstandings between my dad and mum, my dad feels he needs to know the in and out of my mum's money and she is like; No!!! you can't know what i earn and how i spend my money.

That is their own wahala, i don't hide what i earn from my hubby, he knows how i spend my money and not that he cares a bit, at least when it comes to money, we are open to eachother, that will be '-1' of marital problems.

I do not think any woman should hide her earnings of money from her hubby,only for reasons that might affect their pockets, example, if the guy is a compulsive gambler, a drunk, a sex addict (who loves to visit brotels), and so on and so forth, apart from these reasons, i really do not see any other reason a woman will be financially stingy to her hubby.

I had a friend who lost her boyfriend over a pack of cornflakes,can you believe that? the guy came over to her place and wanted to have some, and she lied to him that it was mine, as God would have it, i was actually going to her room at the same time she said no to that guy, on getting there, the guy asked me if he could drink some, (meanwhile my friend was stepping on me) and i innocently removed my feet and said the cornflakes was not mine but hers' and i was looking at her, like 'why would you say it was mine, the guy got up and never came back, who knows if he was just testing her. Well, i felt bad afterwards, not for me though, but for her.

i like what u did to ur friend,very good. I hope she learnt her lessons cos only a true friend would av done dat to her.

Good observation

ronkebp: This money issue, is what is still causing misunderstandings between my dad and mum, my dad feels he needs to know the in and out of my mum's money and she is like; No!!! you can't know what i earn and how i spend my money.

That is their own wahala, i don't hide what i earn from my hubby, he knows how i spend my money and not that he cares a bit, at least when it comes to money, we are open to eachother, that will be '-1' of marital problems.

I do not think any woman should hide her earnings from her hubby,only for reasons that might affect their pockets, example, if the guy is a compulsive gambler, a drunk, a sex addict (who loves to visit brotels), and so on and so forth, apart from these reasons, i really do not see any other reason a woman will be financially stingy to her hubby.

I had a friend who lost her boyfriend over a pack of cornflakes,can you believe that? the guy came over to her place and wanted to have some, and she lied to him that it was mine, as God would have it, i was actually going to her room at the same time she said no to that guy, on getting there, the guy asked me if he could drink some, (meanwhile my friend was stepping on me) and i innocently removed my feet and said the cornflakes was not mine but hers' and i was looking at her, like 'why would you say it was mine, the guy got up and never came back, who knows if he was just testing her. Well, i felt bad afterwards, not for me though, but for her.

LMFAO! What a cheapo! Common cornflakes! LOL! How will she even start to tell people the story of her breakup

Funny my husband I had a conversation very similar to this yesterday. He told me that if I ever make more money than him, he doesn't want to know about it. His exact words were " I will make sure I always earn more than you, but if you ever make more, keep your money, don't tell me. I will always provide for my family." I told him it was silly and childish but e no gree o! So, I will SAVE not hide my money. The day it is needed, I will bring it out.
Many marriages have intense issues. We have heard things about widows being kicked out when the man dies and all what not. I think she is just trying to protect herself!

updated
for me all money will go into one account.
partnership is real business. if you love the person you are with
then no need to be selfish with money. it is OUR money.
i will be in control of kitchen, bank accounts and

ijebabe:

LMFAO! What a cheapo! Common cornflakes! LOL! How will she even start to tell people the story of her breakup

I know!!! right!!!, the worst part is that she does not even eat cornflakes, she only buys it for decor, that was when we were back in school, she said she was stepping on me so that i will understand the scope, common now!!! really? i can never understand that type of scope. , i just spoil the whole show for her oooo.

All things being equal, partner should have a joint account whereby certain percentages are deposited. For instance, if the woman earns 20,000naira, she deposits 60% and the man earns 400,000naira, he deposits 60%. This money should be used to run the home or whatever you want to use it for.

It shouldn't be a case whereby the woman says she earns little while the man feels he earns too much. Sharing should come first. That is marriage for you.

If you're married to a partner with a good head on his shoulders, you should have no fear/problems managing funds together, it makes both parties economically conscious with proper spending. If things eventually go sour, every gain and loss are split into 2 equal parts.

However, women without any form of safeguard should endeavor to be percuniarily wise. Unfortunately, most home-based Naija women fall under this category, so who can blame them for wanting to save for a rainy day.

Nigerian marriage is not yet 'a partnership'. Positions in the family are clearly defined and that's the reality. So if you call yourself the man, the head, you better be ready to foot the bills and keep quiet. Stop crying because the wife refused to give you money. If you've decided to be the king of the castle, 'your way or the highway' like many Nigerian husbands, why do you want to pinch out of your wife's purse?
Only men who are very useful doing the household chores, taking care of the kids and running kitchen errands should complain. Otherwise keep quiet and mind your station while she mind hers.

me i am glad i hid my money in my marriage cos that is what saved me and enabled me to pay for my ante natal care and provide for my daughter - if you know the kind of husband u have and feel the need to hide then needs must.

me tota fo o ovieye

na man with better head for his shoulder we dey pray for, isseee.

contribute 60% from a salary of 20k, the guy 60% from a salary of 400k?
na wah for ya calculation. she should use that 20k buy make up to look good for you now. why do you want her widow mite again?

Nig man sef

my take it everyone goes into one account. from there you pay bills and buy stuff. then each take some money for self.

Missy_B: If you're married to a partner with a good head on his shoulders, you should have no fear/problems managing funds together, it makes both parties economically conscious with proper spending. If things eventually go sour, every gain and loss are split into 2 equal parts.

However, women without any form of safeguard should endeavor to be percuniarily wise. Unfortunately, most home-based Naija women fall under this category, so who can blame them for wanting to save for a rainy day.

Gone are those days when men work hard to take care of their family. Who waits for his wife to feed him?

If any woman is married to an azzhole please save your money well well, these men cannot be trusted

Any man waiting for his wife to dish out her money for the upkeep of their family and angry , she is not spending her money on him or for the household, is JUST LIMITING HIS PROGRESS in life.Its a dynamic rule in life, some men are ignorant on and feel they are wise. The husband is the Provider while the wife manages her husband resources and the homefront. A wise man , should always pray that God will bless him enough to cater for his family , without selling his Birthright to his wife, for peanuts.
I have a male friend, who is married and successful, he always tells me, that he does not even know how much his wife earns and he gives her money every 3weeks for food, children upkeep and her own personal upkeep too, including buying fuel in her car. And he says, this with great content and a man look. He was even the one that mentioned , selling of birthright to the wife. Men, fulfil your responsibility and good fortune will smile down on you and your wives will be so submissive.

jennykadry: There is a serious issue in Nigeria which is really getting worse. Married couples are supposed to be partners but nooooooooo! Instead, a wife working and making money on her own, ties her money to herself while she believes her husband's money belongs to her. Even in cases where the wife is making more money than her husband, she still expects her husband to feed and pay all the bills in the house including her own bills.

Some wives will even wait till their husbands get back from travels before collecting money for feeding the children while the ones they made on their own are pocketed. Situations where some wives buy properties or cars in their own names while their husbands buy properties with their names like Mr Jude & Mrs Princess Okere for property title documents but same can't be said of most 9ja women.

The best you will get from most 9ja women is borrowing which always leads to fight and insults if the husband failed to return it on time.

Now my question is - is this fair to guys or husbands in this society? Why will a woman pocket her own interest funds while she spends the token her hubby makes claiming her money is hers while his money is theirs? What the hell is the meaning of this? Smells like day light scamming....

Guys, is this fair enough? Your wife spending from your money while she keeps hers without even letting you smell it?
Ladies, can your money be shared between you and your husband's equally like men do their wives (note I said husband not boy friend)?
Ladies again , if you are making money more than your hubby, will you be kind enough to relieve him of some major burdens in home expenses without collecting it back claiming that you only borrowed it to him e.g. paying house rent without asking back even if he's not that broke?


Marriage is supposed to be a partnership thing, to show love and support not a choking life decision. What do you think?

Did not read the whole thing becasue I am reading and sleeping I totally understand where you are coming from. But we cannot really compare ourselves to these women who live under a culture like that. Even as she is hiding her money I can guarantee you that she does not know what happens with her husbands money either. I am sure that if you saw $1000 removed from any accounts you share with your husband it will not surprise you because you know exactly what it was removed for. It is not the same with the typical Nigerian marriage especially in Nigeria. For some reason it makes sense to most people to plan a future together but that future does not include them being on the same page for things like money for rretirement etc How can you know what you are planning for when you do not have all your money pooled together.

I remember a day my mum was asking my dad to bring money for a particular thing she wanted to buy, despite the fact she has good paying job. Anyway, my dad replied her, " Woman, ego gi abu ego arusi (Are ur money dedicated to the village shrine or deity)". . . lol



Anyway, as for me, no matter how many billions I have in my bank account, my future wife will be footing some of the house bills. Real men my azz

jennykadry: Gone are those days when men work hard to take care of their family. Who waits for his wife to feed him?
If any woman is married to an azzhole please save your money well well, these men cannot be trusted

Arrant NONSENSE.Why did u marry him in the first place?

For reproduction purposes, not to feed him with my money

I am not in support of that act, its not right and healthy (in terms of marriage) for one partner to keep the income earned from another
But on the second hand most women who fall into that category have constructive reasons for that
Imagine a woman whose in law are against her union with their son and instead advises the man to take another wife
and the boomer of it all was that the man heed to the families advice
I for one won't blame such a woman from keeping her income/savings private from the husband because she knows whats best for her and her kids
and that marriage might explode in her face one day

With the amount of sleep around(s) we have around, a woman has to be smart. If you are married into a wahala family, or married to a skirt chaser or an abuser pleaseeee be smart.

I don't even know how these phillipino men do it, they stay at home whilst their women are the ones working their butts off to sustain the family. Nonsense

@topic and Jennykadry
It depend on the sincerity of both partners. Imagine a woman so sincere with her finances for years but discovered subsequently that the hubby was not in fact he was keeping a concubine. Would any right thinking person advise such a woman to continue declaring & submitting her income to hubby? I think not.
Husband buys property in his name and expect his wife to be handing over her income to him every month?

He who wants equity must come with clean hands!
Some women became cunning after their bitter experiences with our men. I think our society is not yet mature enough in terms of culture to nurture a partnership kind of marriage that require absolute sincerity from both partners!