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Where Are The Gentlemen Of Our Generation? - Romance - Nairaland

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Where Are The Gentlemen Of Our Generation? by lovelydoll: 5:56pm On Jun 18, 2012
Well i met this sweet guy about 3 months ago when i was finishing school.May i remind you i met him online,and still not have met up with him in real life yet.I am here today because i need some advice and i have never dated or had a boyfriend b4. I am 20 and the guy is 30. Here is his description he lives with his mom ,he is a mechanic which is ok and he has a younger sister and younger brother.He claims that he lives with his mom because he had to stop school to support his mother,and that is why he still lives with his mom in the basement.I understood his issue and accepted it.He also had a son at 16 yrs ,but he said he is not sure if its his son but he left his country in africa and the boy lives with his grandparents.Because of these things i understood why he was broke and did not judge him. Because he said he was working hard.
He was a very sweet guy and i wonder what possibly could be wrong with him ,because he also promised me marriage and said he would never leave me after he takes my virginity.

A month later i saw his true colors. He would constantly ask me if i would give him money if we started dating i told him ,no i don't give out money i buy gifts though. He got angry at me and didn't talk to me for a week. yet i told him i understand his situations and i don't mind paying for myself but i can't give him money cause i don't have a job yet and am a student.For some reason he can't seem to understand that and gets mad anytime i say i cant give out money cause the money i use is my parents money ,which is met for me only.And then he comes bk starts insulting me that i better be nice to him else i will grow old and single cause i missed my chance.And i will be looking for him in the future, or he is the only one met for me,cause god made us be together.

Also in the beginning , he claimed to be christian and religious and promised no sex before marriage,but he is trying to convince me that pre-intimacy and anal sex is not sex so we can do that, but i disagreed with him then he got angry and since last week Monday he has not spoken to me.

Of course i am not stupid and i will not date this guy because i can tell we will not get along,and i may end up hurting him from the frustration he may give me.

but
My question since i am new to this dating scene,is are majority of men in this generation like this? Where are the gentlemen?
Re: Where Are The Gentlemen Of Our Generation? by jmoore(m): 6:23pm On Jun 18, 2012
Gentlemen do exist. Since the bad ones are in majority than the good ones,there is a probability that you may meet the bad ones. Though you should not settle for the bad ones.

I find this anal sex as a homosexual behaviour which is disgusting.

He promised if you give him your virginity then he will marry you, what a trap? It is good you did not fall for that because you will have to regret it later.

Don't lose hope, good guys are available.
Re: Where Are The Gentlemen Of Our Generation? by omega25red(m): 6:27pm On Jun 18, 2012
your singular experience with that jerk should not have you questioning if all men are that way. If anything you should take the experience you picked up from that situation and apply it to the next guy you meet. There are good men and bad men out there and, it's really up to you to figure out who they are. Also its up to you to quickly figure out what you are willing to accept from a prospective mate.
Re: Where Are The Gentlemen Of Our Generation? by Rocktation(f): 6:52pm On Jun 18, 2012
Gold Digging Alert!
Advice? RUNNN.
Re: Where Are The Gentlemen Of Our Generation? by LongOne1(m): 6:54pm On Jun 18, 2012
I'm glad you didn't give it up to him. There are still good ones out there, though they might be scarce, but if you are patient, you'll find one.
Re: Where Are The Gentlemen Of Our Generation? by pharmking: 7:13pm On Jun 18, 2012
LAdy, this guy is not good for you. First there is the age gap (30 and 20) nahhh he will manipulate you to get anything out of you. Education wise there is also a gap. He has a kid so there will be baby's mamma issue. At 20 years of age you should date guys from your age range not more than 5 years older so you can learn more about life instead of looking for marriage. There is more to life than marriage!!!! (if you are not well prepared for marriage you will suffer). You can date a guys without having sex...it all depends on how you set expectations from the get go.

All guys are not like him. Set some standard (Minimum/not too high) in order to screen guys. It seems to me that you are not really verse into the dating scene. Reason why you are blaming all the guys. There are really good guys out there. You just found one of the bad ones.
Re: Where Are The Gentlemen Of Our Generation? by Mynd44: 8:41pm On Jun 18, 2012
The guy is a fraud. Don't be surprised if the story of his son is a big lie and he just wants your money. Dump the guy and keep having you fun

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