My story may appear to be the regular teenage drama at first glance. But if you delve deeper, you’ll find that I’m dealing with this big problem: a crush on this boy.

Wait! I know what it looks like at first. “Muslim girl gets a crush on another Muslim boy from the mosque and doesn’t know how to handle it.”

I promise you that it isn’t. It has very little to do with teenage angst. I’m typing this fast so some things might be rushed because I need to finish writing this before my mom wakes up from her nap. If you need any clarifications you can email me back till I’m satisfied with your advice.

I have suffered through depression and didn’t know exactly what was making me feel that way around late 2011. They thought it was a chemical imbalance. I thought I was stressed from my bad grades at school. But now I know that it was the fear of Hell that was burning away my spirit.

I will try to make this part of the story brief so I can get down to the main point. But I need to get this out: Islam has psychologically damaged me. This damage is being healed but some scars will never fade. I may have left Islam but a part of Islam will never leave me. The idea of having to accept sharing my husband with 72 virgins in the afterlife, the idea that the familiar, non-Muslim faces I see at school everyday were going to hell, ideas of angels beating me up in my grave and crushing me so severely that my ribs would overlap just because I failed to bow down to a narcissistic “god”, Allah humiliating me with every little petty thing I’ve done in life, the graphic descriptions of hell that were repeated to me for many years since I was very young…it has messed up my mind and distorted my sense of safety. It didn’t matter if everyone in the world loved me, because the wrath of Allah in the afterlife for making any mistake was sure to ruin a good mood.

To top that off, I learned so much too fast on a plethora of various subjects. I think too much for a 15 year old, hence being called a little philosopher. I don’t say this to brag but I want you to understand that being too smart led to mental isolation. Most teens don’t worry about worldly issues like I do. I wish I wasn’t this way sometimes because it seems like a curse to be so enlightened, for ignorance is a bliss I wish I could bask in. Instead I am aware of the horrible truth called Islam, and I’m aware of the long journey I’m going to have to do endure. I consider myself agnostic.

There is this boy who is in the same grade and school as me as well as mosque. I’ve noticed that he displays signs of being a potential apostate. We’d both ask the sheikh deep questions about Islam. Of course we got lame answers. I even talked to him about Islam briefly once at school. I asked him if the religion confused him sometimes. He said it would keep him up all night at times. He said things don’t make sense but all he can do is trust Allah.

He said he felt suicidal at times, like me. We talked a bit more and I saw he went through a lot of mental and emotional scarring like me such as bullying and isolation. He is literally the only person I have left. And I started to like him because of that. If he really is confused about Islam, then I guess he needs me too so we can support each other.

Two days ago I accidentally told my parents I didn’t believe in Islam. It was terrifying to discover that the love a Muslim parent has for their child could be so conditional. They threatened to kick me out of the house and didn’t care about what I would do with myself. So it took hours to pretend that I didn’t know what I was saying and that I believe in Islam again.

Now I have to pretend to be Muslim for a few more years till I can move out. Then I want to be free. But I want to and have to get married when I grow up, and it has to be a Muslim man. Of course, I can’t marry a Muslim because then I’d have to lie to him too and be stuck with Islam for the rest of my life. There is no way I could get away with marrying a non-Muslim either.

So my idea sounds really crazy, which is why I need your advice. Well, I was thinking…the boy I have been talking to, I like him and if I can somehow convince him Islam is not true, we can marry and move far away so our parents will be happy with us. Since we’re both “Muslims” they won’t suspect anything. But this will only work if he agrees with me. If he doesn’t, I am scared for my future. I am not doing this because of crazy teenage hormones, but I’m trying to be reasonable and I’m working on my future, and this is the only solution I have come up with. Even if we may turn out not to be compatible, we can just be friends, marry in front of our family, live in the same house (but different rooms) for show and have the relationships we want to have.

Lastly, I have one obstacle to get around with this: the imam of our mosque is brainwashing him and other youth. The imam is confusing him and I need to speak with him as soon as I can before it’s too late to reverse the damage. I’d like to explain but it’s a long story and I wanted to keep this letter short.

I really want to know what you think and how I should approach the situation and any tips you can give me. Thank you for reading, and please know that, and you’ve probably heard this so many times, you’ve helped me renounce Islam. I don’t really leave comments on your articles but it doesn’t mean I don’t read them. I appreciate your work. You are helping to move the world to a better state.

Dear M.A. (or maybe I should call you little philosopher too),

You are smarter beyond your age. Often smarter people are more sensitive. One peculiarity of teen years is that everything looks more dramatic. Simple problems that have easy solutions, for teenagers appear insurmountable.

Thinking about suicide is also normal for teenagers. But gladly few act on it. You don’t have to think about it too much. Just know that most of the problems that at this age seem real to you, are not. And if they are, they are insignificant. When you grow up you will face real problems.

A life without problems is an illusion. Think of life as a game, say football or any game. The fun of the game is facing resistance and overcoming it. If there is no resistance there is no game. No one wants to play such game. The same is true in life. Happiness and success are in overcoming obstacles not in not having them. Life is full of obstacles and problems. The important thing is to confidently tackle them.

Looks like nature wants to tell us, from the moment of our birth, with all the resistance and pains that it throws at us that life in this world is going to be struggle. There is no such thing as happiness. There are hardship and problems and intervals of no problems. It is up to us to make the most of those intervals when problems are not many and be happy.

Sadly, the belief in the lies of Muhammad makes everyone depressive. It is hard to find an emotionally healthy Muslim. They have low self-esteem, are shy or depressive or narcissist or paranoid and or all of them together. As a matter of fact Muslims suffer from more mental and emotional disorders than any other people.

You did not tell me where you live. If you live in a western country you have more options than if you live in an Islamic country. Even in an Islamic country you are not helpless. At the age of 15 I would not be too concerned about marriage. You have another ten years to go before thinking about marriage. In my personal view the best age for marriage is late twenties. Statistically, there are more divorces among people marring in younger ages.

You are fortunate because you are intelligent. This means your chance of living a free life is much higher. You are already free from the shackles of Islam. No bogyman in the sky, no hell and no sadistic angels in grave can scare you any more. That is a lot for a 15 years old girl to achieve when over a billion grownups, many of whom educated and accomplished people are still trapped in that web of silly lies.

You are afraid of your physical entrapment. That is also an unfounded fear. It is much easier to break the physical chains than the psychological ones. You have set yourself free psychologically. Attaining your physical freedom is much easier.

The key to your freedom is independence. At this moment you have to focus on your studies. Go to the best university you can and get the best education you can afford. You are smart; don’t settle for an undergraduate degree. Aim high. Once you are educated you will be on demand anywhere in the world. All doors open to you. This will lead to your independence.

Don’t marry early. Marriage is not the way out of the problems at home. Independence is. During this time, hang your philosopher hat and put on your student hat. Go after science. Learning is the key to your freedom. Once you have a good job, living independently and earning your own living, nobody can tell you what to do with your life or whom to marry.

You have to realize that the parents control over their children diminishes in time. It reaches to a stage that the balance of powers will be totally reversed and the parents will become dependent on the children. In about ten years, when you have your own career and earn your own living, you and your parents reach equilibrium of powers. By then they can’t boss you around. From there on, every day, you gain more power while they lose. This hierarchy of powers that at this moment seems so oppressive to you will be reversed. Give time a chance. In a decade, none of these problems that today seem so daunting will exist. They will melt gradually, like a mountain of ice under the sun.

Another strange phenomenon is that the younger you are the longer time seems to last. For older people time passes quickly, when for younger people it seems to be very slow. But ten years is not much when you compare it with the rest of your life.

As for this boy in your school, if you can encourage him to read my articles he may also realize the deception of Islam.

You should also know that people’s characters are not yet formed at that young age. You and this boy will go through some very fundamental changes in the coming 15 years and will be very different people. So don’t take any relationship with someone of opposite sex at this age too seriously. You probably will fall in love a few times before you find your right life partner. There is plenty of fish in the sea. At this time, your focus should not be on finding a life partner, but on studying and becoming the best you can be.

There is a time for everything. For you, this is the time to study. All other things come next. Plan your life correctly and you will have a very happy life. Don’t study just for the diploma, but for the knowledge. Your diploma will not find you a job, your expertise will.

True. I was reborn when i renounced religion. The earlier, the better.

Not sure if troll actually. I can't remember 15, but I sure as hell wasn't clear-minded as you appear to be, neither were most of the 15 yr olds. Also, this line; "I have suffered through depression and didn’t know exactly what was making me feel that way around late 2011. They thought it was a chemical imbalance. I thought I was stressed from my bad grades at school. But now I know that it was the fear of Hell that was burning away my spirit." I actually lol'd.

Okay, serious stuff now. Assuming not troll, part of what you are experiencing may be teenage drama, but just the love part. I'd ignore it, but my heart is made of stone when it comes to those issues. The rest is not so regular. Here is the key part, SCHOOL. Financial freedom is key, and it is much more easily attained with degrees. If asked, I don't lie about my position on religion, much to my detriment actually, and I don't have a degree. I can tell you it's been hell and I definitely would have arrived where I'm at in life at the moment much sooner had I cared. I cannot stress this enough, financial freedom is key. Now I don't have to put up with holier than thou crap among many other things.

"You have to realize that the parents control over their children diminishes in time. It reaches to a stage that the balance of powers will be totally reversed and the parents will become dependent on the children. In about ten years, when you have your own career and earn your own living, you and your parents reach equilibrium of powers. By then they can’t boss you around. From there on, every day, you gain more power while they lose. This hierarchy of powers that at this moment seems so oppressive to you will be reversed. Give time a chance. In a decade, none of these problems that today seem so daunting will exist. They will melt gradually, like a mountain of ice under the sun.

Another strange phenomenon is that the younger you are the longer time seems to last. For older people time passes quickly, when for younger people it seems to be very slow. But ten years is not much when you compare it with the rest of your life.

There is a time for everything. For you, this is the time to study. All other things come next. Plan your life correctly and you will have a very happy life. Don’t study just for the diploma, but for the knowledge. Your diploma will not find you a job, your expertise will."

Also, are you in Nigeria or abroad. Poster above knows his/her stuff (why was it posted with your account, are you trolling?). The last bit though requires balance. Learning for fun projects vs learning for financial reasons. Or basically, try to avoid becoming a dilettante. I add that because I suspect you are the kind who spends all day on wiki for fun.

Speaking of personality, have you heard of the mbti? Some of your issues sound like typical N vs S issues. If you aren't familiar with mbti you wouldn't know what I mean of course. I highly recommend you take the test though

http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/jtypes2.asp

If I had known this stuff ten years ago my life would have been completely different (just like the say in many adverts while you roll your eyes). It helped me understand what caused the apparent schism between me and most of the world. But bear in mind, this is not exact science, do not take it too seriously. It is a tool which can help you understand others motivations, and shed some light who you really are as well. As an N (or iNtuitive, I'm assuming you're one from various clues), you are more concerned with abstract issues (what you called worldly) then with immediate practical issues unlike an S (or Sensor). S's heavily outnumber N's population-wise, and SJ's (commonly called traditionalists by the mbti community, you know the type, always on time, zero imagination, risk-averse, follow the rules blindly, collect a huge chunk of facts without actually caring about how stuff works, etc etc), who seem to have an axe in store for every xNTP they meet, keep life's engine running on the micro level. It's not uncommon for N's, particularly NT's to think they are aliens while growing up. But fear not, if you look at list of probable (remember, this is not exact science) N's most people will agree that the N-list is by far and away more impressive.

Who do you think will go on to impact the world more, the girl who's worrying about makeup and what so and so boy did with so and so girl and who wore what and what kind of car was blah driving (u get d point, inane s@$t) or the 16 yr old who starts to wonder if one could ever catch up to a light beam and hold it his hands? He then sets off on a dogged journey, with a teacher calling him a lazy dog and another telling him he would never amount to much, struggling with rote learning and some authority figures, etc, which takes him roughly 10 yrs. All the while he's acquiring tools necessary to figure out his projects, which he uses to radically change the way we view the universe (in the most insouciant way even). The last hurdle done while working as a civil servant, a job where he was passed off for promotion. Now most of us certainly do not have the kind of intuition Einstein (usually regarded as the quintessential INTP in the mbti community) had, but it's nice to know that people I admire (Newton,Shakespeare,Lincon are all usually typed as N's, among many others) were actually quite similar to you. Despite what they may have told you elsewhere, there is nothing wrong with you.


random note: age and time is usually attributed to older people having more memories to mull over and compare with current situations than younger ones. like money, if you have lots when you are given more you won't notice it as much as a poorer person will when given the same amount... random random note: sj's come at me, despite one of my best buds and my bro who has a ridiculously big heart being sj, I still hate you guys so, so much

@ op,

i really empathise with you and I understand your internal struggle

concerning, the issue you raised, why not show the guy the articles you had been reading and see his initial reaction, start with those less challenging to islamic faith

if he is receptive, proceed to show him more and more reasons to reconsider his religious faith and try to convince him gently in love, which should be easy for you, i guess.

deconversion from one's parent's religion is very difficult, i'm telling you from experience. so you have to be very patient and tactful with him. but what has to be done has to be done. we have only one chance to live our lives and surrendering it to religious control is a worst way way to live.

i really wish you the best of luck.

wiegraf: Not sure if troll actually. I can't remember 15, but I sure as hell wasn't clear-minded as you appear to be, neither were most of the 15 yr olds. Also, this line; "I have suffered through depression and didn’t know exactly what was making me feel that way around late 2011. They thought it was a chemical imbalance. I thought I was stressed from my bad grades at school. But now I know that it was the fear of Hell that was burning away my spirit." I actually lol'd.











Speaking of personality, have you heard of the mbti? Some of your issues sound like typical N vs S issues. If you aren't familiar with mbti you wouldn't know what I mean of course. I highly recommend you take the test though

http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/jtypes2.asp

If I had known this stuff ten years ago my life would have been completely different (just like the say in many adverts while you roll your eyes). It helped me understand what caused the apparent schism between me and most of the world. But bear in mind, this is not exact science, do not take it too seriously. It is a tool which can help you understand others motivations, and shed some light who you really are as well. As an N (or iNtuitive, I'm assuming you're one from various clues), you are more concerned with abstract issues (what you called worldly) then with immediate practical issues unlike an S (or Sensor). S's heavily outnumber N's population-wise, and SJ's (commonly called traditionalists by the mbti community, you know the type, always on time, zero imagination, risk-averse, follow the rules blindly, collect a huge chunk of facts without actually caring about how stuff works, etc etc), who seem to have an axe in store for every xNTP they meet, keep life's engine running on the micro level. It's not uncommon for N's, particularly NT's to think they are aliens while growing up. But fear not, if you look at list of probable (remember, this is not exact science) N's most people will agree that the N-list is by far and away more impressive.




random note: age and time is usually attributed to older people having more memories to mull over and compare with current situations than younger ones. like money, if you have lots when you are given more you won't notice it as much as a poorer person will when given the same amount... random random note: sj's come at me, despite one of my best buds and my bro who has a ridiculously big heart being sj, I still hate you guys so, so much

There is so much foreign speak in this post. Are you Nigerian?
I loved this write up, specifically the mbti part. Was starting to wonder if others have heard of it. It's usually the mundane and irritating mel san chol phlegm rubbish I hear people talking about.

@op
Two things, while early marriage is not the best thing to do, just be very careful, so that u dont destroy yourself with premarital SEX

As u grow up u will gain more knowledge, and u will be better place to advice yourself.

What u owe yourself is an HONEST MIND. Never loose it.
Peace

fellis:

There is so much foreign speak in this post. Are you Nigerian?
I loved this write up, specifically the mbti part. Was starting to wonder if others have heard of it. It's usually the mundane and irritating mel san chol phlegm rubbish I hear people talking about.

Sadly, I haven't left this country in over 10 years. I suffer from intp hence the need to know everything (and live on your own planet). Really I'm a bit surprised its not caught on here too. It could be really useful to a lot ppl, easing a lot of pain. What type are you, if I may ask?

wiegraf:

Sadly, I haven't left this country in over 10 years. I suffer from intp hence the need to know everything (and live on your own planet). Really I'm a bit surprised its not caught on here too. It could be really useful to a lot ppl, easing a lot of pain. What type are you, if I may ask?

You're INTP? Holy sh[i]i[/i]t!!! No way dude!!!

fellis:

You're INTP? Holy sh[i]i[/i]t!!! No way dude!!!

Why?? Its not that rare, really lol! I've even dated an intp (yes, we'd actually forget we were going out and not see for months, we never even really broke up ). A female intp is a rare beast though. I might be projecting, but I'm guessing op is too. Questioning (to the point she gets tagged as the philosopher), objective, socially awkward with a 'worldly' view, Ti supplying her the stubborn streak. Even the need to connect, manifesting itself as her feelings (icky word) for the boy and turning her seemingly usually good judgement on its head ( with the marriage thing ) is that infamous trouble maker, our inferior Fe. If not she's most likely an nt anyways, as are most of atheists here. You're an nt as well? From your surprise I'm guessing xNTP?

_

she's a northener. Met her in uni ( where I was duly kicked for not attending classes, twice, hence the lack of degree I mentioned earlier ). She hides her powerlevels well though. Half the time she's coming up with the most ridiculous concepts, the other half such piercing insight I'm left wondering wth. Getting her to open up is no easy task, despite that she's so cchhhiilll. Watching I get a sense of how ppl view us

_

I know this thread was transferred to this section. All of this Psychology should be in the health section I think. One of you experts should open a thread in the health section and link it with this one. I took the test and they say I am INTP, what does that mean? State it in the new thread.

Thank you.

^There is a link on the page with the results that contains info about whatever you get after taking the test. . . . .
http://www.intp.org/intprofile.html

fellis: ^There is a link on the page with the results that contains info about whatever you get after taking the test. . . . .
http://www.intp.org/intprofile.html

I found a lot of what was said there to be true about me.

maclatunji:

I found a lot of what was said there to be true about me.

Good for you.
Maclatunji, sorry I could not start a new thread there, it would be too stressful for me. Don't worry me and wiegraf are not going to use here as a chatroom any longer.

^ No problem, I can understand. Even me sef dey under pressure.

WTH??!!!! I took the test and it says I'm ISFP:.
What does it mean?
Like I'm some kind of dunce? ** crying** but it makes so much sense to me now. I'm very creative... with my hands and my power of imagination is like wow!!! but when it comes to do the do... its funny, I'm a totally different person o. im so introverted it scares me... not too good with crowds too... dat's why I don't go to all these asalatu s o... its just too crowdy and everyone in everyone faces. I dumped my hijab for a scarve... and now I'm thinking going into caps... I don't always stick to the plan o... is that bad? I guess so... im curious to understand this better... u av no idea how much....
I'm born a muslim... been an eckist... been an atheist... judaism I tried but ran away from... Christianity felt comfortable buh not so much on the teachings sha... kinda twisted in a lot of ways... all religion are kinda twisted sha... its just left to one to come up with something u are comfortable with.

Send me an email pls. @fellis... maclantunji... pls notify her for me

tidytim: My story may appear to be the regular teenage drama at first glance. But if you delve deeper, you’ll find that I’m dealing with this big problem: a crush on this boy.

Wait! I know what it looks like at first. “Muslim girl gets a crush on another Muslim boy from the mosque and doesn’t know how to handle it.”

I promise you that it isn’t. It has very little to do with teenage angst. I’m typing this fast so some things might be rushed because I need to finish writing this before my mom wakes up from her nap. If you need any clarifications you can email me back till I’m satisfied with your advice.

I have suffered through depression and didn’t know exactly what was making me feel that way around late 2011. They thought it was a chemical imbalance. I thought I was stressed from my bad grades at school. But now I know that it was the fear of Hell that was burning away my spirit.

I will try to make this part of the story brief so I can get down to the main point. But I need to get this out: Islam has psychologically damaged me. This damage is being healed but some scars will never fade. I may have left Islam but a part of Islam will never leave me. The idea of having to accept sharing my husband with 72 virgins in the afterlife, the idea that the familiar, non-Muslim faces I see at school everyday were going to hell, ideas of angels beating me up in my grave and crushing me so severely that my ribs would overlap just because I failed to bow down to a narcissistic “god”, Allah humiliating me with every little petty thing I’ve done in life, the graphic descriptions of hell that were repeated to me for many years since I was very young…it has messed up my mind and distorted my sense of safety. It didn’t matter if everyone in the world loved me, because the wrath of Allah in the afterlife for making any mistake was sure to ruin a good mood.

To top that off, I learned so much too fast on a plethora of various subjects. I think too much for a 15 year old, hence being called a little philosopher. I don’t say this to brag but I want you to understand that being too smart led to mental isolation. Most teens don’t worry about worldly issues like I do. I wish I wasn’t this way sometimes because it seems like a curse to be so enlightened, for ignorance is a bliss I wish I could bask in. Instead I am aware of the horrible truth called Islam, and I’m aware of the long journey I’m going to have to do endure. I consider myself agnostic.

There is this boy who is in the same grade and school as me as well as mosque. I’ve noticed that he displays signs of being a potential apostate. We’d both ask the sheikh deep questions about Islam. Of course we got lame answers. I even talked to him about Islam briefly once at school. I asked him if the religion confused him sometimes. He said it would keep him up all night at times. He said things don’t make sense but all he can do is trust Allah.

He said he felt suicidal at times, like me. We talked a bit more and I saw he went through a lot of mental and emotional scarring like me such as bullying and isolation. He is literally the only person I have left. And I started to like him because of that. If he really is confused about Islam, then I guess he needs me too so we can support each other.

Two days ago I accidentally told my parents I didn’t believe in Islam. It was terrifying to discover that the love a Muslim parent has for their child could be so conditional. They threatened to kick me out of the house and didn’t care about what I would do with myself. So it took hours to pretend that I didn’t know what I was saying and that I believe in Islam again.

Now I have to pretend to be Muslim for a few more years till I can move out. Then I want to be free. But I want to and have to get married when I grow up, and it has to be a Muslim man. Of course, I can’t marry a Muslim because then I’d have to lie to him too and be stuck with Islam for the rest of my life. There is no way I could get away with marrying a non-Muslim either.

So my idea sounds really crazy, which is why I need your advice. Well, I was thinking…the boy I have been talking to, I like him and if I can somehow convince him Islam is not true, we can marry and move far away so our parents will be happy with us. Since we’re both “Muslims” they won’t suspect anything. But this will only work if he agrees with me. If he doesn’t, I am scared for my future. I am not doing this because of crazy teenage hormones, but I’m trying to be reasonable and I’m working on my future, and this is the only solution I have come up with. Even if we may turn out not to be compatible, we can just be friends, marry in front of our family, live in the same house (but different rooms) for show and have the relationships we want to have.

Lastly, I have one obstacle to get around with this: the imam of our mosque is brainwashing him and other youth. The imam is confusing him and I need to speak with him as soon as I can before it’s too late to reverse the damage. I’d like to explain but it’s a long story and I wanted to keep this letter short.

I really want to know what you think and how I should approach the situation and any tips you can give me. Thank you for reading, and please know that, and you’ve probably heard this so many times, you’ve helped me renounce Islam. I don’t really leave comments on your articles but it doesn’t mean I don’t read them. I appreciate your work. You are helping to move the world to a better state.

I really understand how you feel. But I'm a muslim, I just don't bother overthinking things. I don't follow the normal pattern that everyone follows. I'm a diff kind of muslim and I am comfortable with it. It's stressful when you try to overthink any religion... I guess I kinda know what you are, and yes it must be scary for u. But I'm going to go with the first comment... marriage is not the answer. independence is, and then you can decide on your own.

@

mizzthang:

I really understand how you feel. But I'm a muslim, I just don't bother overthinking things. I don't follow the normal pattern that everyone follows. I'm a diff kind of muslim and I am comfortable with it. It's stressful when you try to overthink any religion... I guess I kinda know what you are, and yes it must be scary for u. But I'm going to go with the first comment... marriage is not the answer. independence is, and then you can decide on your own.

Hi missthang.

You can't disregard marriage if you're a muslim because it's a very vital and fundamental part of the religion. As a muslim marriage makes up 50% of your faith and 50% of your total rewards on the day of judgement.
Also, you can't be independent as a muslim woman as it is the duty of a man to provide for you after he marries you. Fine, you may decide to get your own job and earn extra on the side but the fact remains that it is the ideal for muslim men to provide for women.
The qur'an says in Surah An-Nisa verse 34;
”Men are the protectors and maintainers of women' because Allah has made one of them excel the other, and because they spend to support them from their means“.

This implies that men have been charged with the duty of protecting and maintaining women. As you can see from the verse it is not an option or something people can choose to do or not do. It is obligatory, it is the very reason why men are considered to be superior to women in Islam.

I sent you an email like you asked.
I would really like to communicate with you outside nairaland

^^no wonder.... I am independent. I can decide not to marry. If I get beaten or get emotionally abused, I am the one that will suffer it.

Sorry....not for me.

mizzthang: ^^no wonder.... I am independent. I can decide not to marry. If I get beaten or get emotionally abused, I am the one that will suffer it.

Sorry....not for me.

Tsk, tsk, tsk.

Very unislamic views you have there.....

A born clown can never be an INTP. You must have stumbled into a joke site.

maclatunji:


I found a lot of what was said there to be true about me.