Take a scenerio where you go to a guy's house (it may be a brother, a relation, or a friend). The guys house is in a mess... clothes strewn everywhere, empty soda cans in the hallway and the plates in the sink so dirty, the remnants had caked. But, this guy has a girlfriend who comes to visit from time to time.

Also bear in mind that guys sometimes act as confused beings.

As a lady you may be all "domestic" cleaning his flat, washing his plates, cleaning the bathrooms and toilet; cos you can't stand dirty places and the next thing is that, you are being tagged as "playing wifey". That is you are positioning yourself or strategising to get the guy to marry you.

The question is; How do you know that a Lady is not just being caring, that it is actualy lin her xter. That she is not trying to trick a guy into seeing her wifely xters, thus pushing the guy to the alter.

Again, How many YARDS OF WIFE MATERIAL is a Lady supposed to possess that will fit just right?

Why would any woman in her right mind be "strategizing", "positioning" or "trick" a dirty filthy pig to the alter in the first instance?

chaircover: Why would any woman in her right mind be "strategizing", "positioning" or "trick" a dirty filthy pig to the alter in the first instance?

l

Madam, chaircover. Some guys are lazy when it comes to doing simple household chores. And please don't tell me You have not heard that some men will rather prefer not to have anything to with house chores.
The guy might be great in other areas, but his place may not always be spic and span.

Abali1: Take a scenerio where you go to a guy's house (it may be a brother, a relation, or a friend). The guys house is in a mess... clothes strewn everywhere, empty soda cans in the hallway and the plates in the sink so dirty, the remnants had caked. But, this guy has a girlfriend who comes to visit from time to time.

Also bear in mind that guys sometimes act as confused beings.

As a lady you may be all "domestic" cleaning his flat, washing his plates, cleaning the bathrooms and toilet; cos you can't stand dirty places and the next thing is that, you are being tagged as "playing wifey". That is you are positioning yourself or strategising to get the guy to marry you.

The question is; How do you know that a Lady is not just being caring, that it is actualy lin her xter. That she is not trying to trick a guy into seeing her wifely xters, thus pushing the guy to the alter.

Again, How many YARDS OF WIFE MATERIAL is a Lady supposed to possess that will fit just right?

Abali, This is not just a case of the odd sock here or there or general untidiness . . . . this sounds like a pig and I dont think that any woman in her right senses will want to live with that for the rest of her life.

The woman should think ahead and see that this is the kind of man who will be expecting her to be pounding yam when she is 9 months pregnant cos he cant boil an egg to save his life

funny thread.

@ topic


guy, marry her and stop wasting time.

Actually the fault is mine, for not presenting the post exactly as the original story. I read a topic in the relationship section of bellanaija.com with the same Heading as the post.

Having said that, where should ladies draw the line when it comes to helping out in their guy's house... without giving the impression that they are invading the guy's space or try to trick the guy into marrying them. In other words how mcuh effort should a Lady expend in doing those "wifely chores in her guy's house" without being seen as a Desperado.

not sure, actually.

i guess if the relationship is just casual then she doesnt have to?

but some people do not like untidy environments.

If she cleans, and she's his type (meaning no major objections), then why not take it to the next level?

but if she's not the only girlfriend, ie candidate, then i dont know.

@OP
each and every man will have a different view as to what qualities a woman must possess to be referred to as "wife material"......thinking that there is a set for all will have you fail time and time again!

That was what i never did....clean a 'boy-friends house"? tufia!!!! if i am coming over..you better clean that house, or else we would be having our conversation outside and that would be the end.

Meanwhile....just because a lady cleans does not mean she is a wife material, it is true some ladies do that to try and hook the man, while some do it out of the "love" they think they have for him (stupidity).

You have to put a ring on it first(big diamond for that matter) and walk down the aisle, i will not be slaving for no niggar.

ronkebp: That was what i never did....clean a 'boy-friends house"? tufia!!!! if i am coming over..you better clean that house, or else we would be having our conversation outside and that would be the end.

Meanwhile....just because a lady cleans does not mean she is a wife material, it is true some ladies do that to try and hook the man, while some do it out of the "love" they think they have for him (stupidity).

You have to put a ring on it first(big diamond for that matter) and walk down the aisle, i will not be slaving for no niggar.

This is one thing I dislike about ladies. You will not clean any guys place (or do his cookings) because you people are not yet married. But, you will like the guy to be understanding and help you out in your little needs... even though those roles should be the exclusive preserve of the Hubby.

Abali1:

This is one thing I dislike about ladies. You will not clean any guys place (or do his cookings) because you people are not yet married. But, you will like the guy to be understanding and help you out in your little needs... even though those roles should be the exclusive preserve of the Hubby.

And why would i want a guy to help out with "little needs", is he my father? if he chooses to do, it is up to him and not mandatory. Why would i clean a boyfriends house? a fiance is a different thing entirely...maybe when the lady goes over during the weekend.

Not i toast you and you are already sweeping the floor....you buy 'mr.biggs" na to wash the guy clothes be the next thing....even all the good girls are still being dumped talk-more of a stupid one.

@Ronke,

If you have a flat tire would you call this same boyfriend for assistance with fixing it? if you have some major lifting or moving, Do you call him? etc

A girl who got into an accident and the first person she called was her boyfriend, is that right also since they are not married and she isnt bearing his name

dayokanu: @Ronke,

If you have a flat tire would you call this same boyfriend for assistance with fixing it? if you have some major lifting or moving, Do you call him? etc

A girl who got into an accident and the first person she called was her boyfriend, is that right also since they are not married and she isnt bearing his name

Dayokanu, thank you for this. Maybe at that moment of your need(not necessarily monetary) and you call your boyfriend for those little handy jobs that natuarally suits a guy & he doesn't respond, won't you feel that the guy does not care about your feelings.
A lady friend once asked me to take her to her younger sis' Matriculation taking place outside the state where I reside and I declined cos I wasn't feeling too strong at that time. She felt disappointed and it took quite a while before she got around to calling me again.

Dayo there is a difference between one off unavoidable emergencies and a constant expectation for your girlfriend to clear up after you, go to market, cook for, wash your clothes and open her legs each time she comes to visit, but you are right, some women expect their boyfriends to take over what their parents should be doing and want the boyfriend to do everything for them from topping up their credit to paying their school fees and that is just wrong.

^^ if you visit your gf, there would always be something to help her with, Just like when the girl visit and there is always something to fix in your house

Whether its repositioning the couch, fixing her light bulb, lifting heavy stuffs bought, Making her TV clearer by just adjusting cable, changing the oil in her car, fixing electrical issues etc.

So its not just one off.

Most women dont even know a thing about anything electrical, mechanical etc. The moment they start a car and it doesnt kick, they are stuck. Its their bf thats the first point of call before the mechanic. Even after calling the handyman Most women would feel comfortable leaving their bf to handle the mechanic and electrician while they do something else.

I believe in a relationship there is always room for helping one another out.

if you are going on a journey with a boyfriend and it involves long distance drive, I am sure most women lets say 70% would just relax their seat and the guy would drive, while its the girl that would make hotel reservation etc That does not mean they are slaves its called helping out.

If you bf stands and watches you struggling with a heavy load, I am sure many women would come here and call him names

dayokanu: @Ronke,

If you have a flat tire would you call this same boyfriend for assistance with fixing it? if you have some major lifting or moving, Do you call him? etc

A girl who got into an accident and the first person she called was her boyfriend, is that right also since they are not married and she isnt bearing his name

And what if they are not living in the same State?, the girl will not look for another help somewhere but wait for the boyfriend to come and help her out from Anambra to kogi.

dayokanu: ^^ if you visit your gf, there would always be something to help her with, Just like when the girl visit and there is always something to fix in your house

Whether its repositioning the couch, fixing her light bulb, lifting heavy stuffs bought, Making her TV clearer by just adjusting cable, changing the oil in her car, fixing electrical issues etc.

So its not just one off.

Most women dont even know a thing about anything electrical, mechanical etc. The moment they start a car and it doesnt kick, they are stuck. Its their bf thats the first point of call before the mechanic. Even after calling the handyman Most women would feel comfortable leaving their bf to handle the mechanic and electrician while they do something else.

I believe in a relationship there is always room for helping one another out.

if you are going on a journey with a boyfriend and it involves long distance drive, I am sure most women lets say 70% would just relax their seat and the guy would drive, while its the girl that would make hotel reservation etc That does not mean they are slaves its called helping out.

If you bf stands and watches you struggling with a heavy load, I am sure many women would come here and call him names

How many times have you visited your babe and helped her out with fixing her light-bulb, or dish washer or washer and dryer, how many times have you carried her car to the mechanic for general check-up, just because you want to prove to her that you 'love her'?.

How many times have you helped her to carry her 'heavy load'...?

Have you ever asked her to drive during this journey or whatever journey you are embarking on and she refused to drive?

Like i said before, doing it for your fiance is different from doing it for any Tom, dick and harry...just because he carrys the tag "my boyfriend",...after three months, he or she is on to the next available one and she will start her cleaning all over again.

Abali1:

Dayokanu, thank you for this. Maybe at that moment of your need(not necessarily monetary) and you call your boyfriend for those little handy jobs that natuarally suits a guy & he doesn't respond, won't you feel that the guy does not care about your feelings.
A lady friend once asked me to take her to her younger sis' Matriculation taking place outside the state where I reside and I declined cos I wasn't feeling too strong at that time. She felt disappointed and it took quite a while before she got around to calling me again.

so how is that equal to a lady constantly coming over to a guys house to clean just because he professed 'love' to her. has she finished cleaning her own house?

a man is not marriage material if his home is like animal farm laid out in original Post.

you should keep clean for your lady's arrival.
i'd prefer to visit a nice/clean home. Also get food ready for my arrival too.
too tired to cook then immediately i come in, go get your key and we go dine somewhere.

no manage so tay turn me to your cook/kitchen aide when we never marry bikonu.

Do what i'd do for you.

ronkebp:

And what if they are not living in the same State?, the girl will not look for another help somewhere but wait for the boyfriend to come and help her out from Anambra to kogi.

If they are not living in the same state also the guy wont wait for her to come and clean his sink.

he was doing it somehow without her

ronkebp:

How many times have you visited your babe and helped her out with fixing her light-bulb, or dish washer or washer and dryer, how many times have you carried her car to the mechanic for general check-up, just because you want to prove to her that you 'love her'?.

How many times have you helped her to carry her 'heavy load'...?

Have you ever asked her to drive during this journey or whatever journey you are embarking on and she refused to drive?

Like i said before, doing it for your fiance is different from doing it for any Tom, dick and harry...just because he carrys the tag "my boyfriend",...after three months, he or she is on to the next available one and she will start her cleaning all over again.

The same number of time that she comes to cook and clean in my apartment

If I'm going to be staying in his house for a short while, I could clean it, before something starts growing on my skin.
Now, that is by the way.
If he thinks I'd leave my own house to become his housekeeper, then he must be cra.zy. Have you seen my own room sef? I've not finished with mine, I'll come and be babying an adult. Tufiakwa gi.

Abali1: Actually the fault is mine, for not presenting the post exactly as the original story. I read a topic in the relationship section of bellanaija.com with the same Heading as the post.

Having said that, where should ladies draw the line when it comes to helping out in their guy's house... without giving the impression that they are invading the guy's space or try to trick the guy into marrying them. In other words how mcuh effort should a Lady expend in doing those "wifely chores in her guy's house" without being seen as a Desperado.

Be yourself at all times. Don't know why you'd be worrying your head over what an ordinary man is thinking . If you wanna clean, clean all the way. If you wanna cross your legs, cross all the way. If he thinks you're keeping his smelly house clean to be his wife not because you can't afford to catch an infection or runny stomach when you visit, let him. In fact when you hear such retorts from him, laugh am well well.

Seriously I don't think a guy who loves you would ever insinuate such.

A man who loves you would make an effort of keeping his house clean when you visit. He would want his princess to be comfortable.

Abali1: Take a scenerio where you go to a guy's house (it may be a brother, a relation, or a friend). The guys house is in a mess... clothes strewn everywhere, empty soda cans in the hallway and the plates in the sink so dirty, the remnants had caked. But, this guy has a girlfriend who comes to visit from time to time.

Also bear in mind that guys sometimes act as confused beings.

As a lady you may be all "domestic" cleaning his flat, washing his plates, cleaning the bathrooms and toilet; cos you can't stand dirty places and the next thing is that, you are being tagged as "playing wifey". That is you are positioning yourself or strategising to get the guy to marry you.

The question is; How do you know that a Lady is not just being caring, that it is actualy lin her xter. That she is not trying to trick a guy into seeing her wifely xters, thus pushing the guy to the alter.

Again, How many YARDS OF WIFE MATERIAL is a Lady supposed to possess that will fit just right?

First of all, why is your room messy and dirty?

Being a guy does not permit you to be messy and to lack good hygiene. You grew up with a mother, you likely grew up with female siblings. So what is the excuse?

What keeps you so busy? What do you do that your gf does not do? So you're a student, what if she's also a student? You have a job, most likely she also has a job. If she asks you to pay for some of her bills or for her school fees, won't you open mouth to complain?

So why should the girl be expected to display her wifey requirements when you're not displaying your husband requirement?

Men should stop lazying around. . . .esp Nigerian men and their "wifey" mentality.

Rolls eyes.

True, without anything growing on her skin
I hate dirty living space, i will be having imaginary itching all day.

stillwater: If I'm going to be staying in his house for a short while, I could clean it, before something starts growing on my skin.

A man who loves you would make an effort of keeping his house clean when you visit. He would want his princess to be comfortable.

dayokanu: @Ronke,

If you have a flat tire would you call this same boyfriend for assistance with fixing it? if you have some major lifting or moving, Do you call him? etc

A girl who got into an accident and the first person she called was her boyfriend, is that right also since they are not married and she isnt bearing his name

That's why you never leave home without your Triple A card. For $60.00 a year, I get my tires fixed without having to wash toilet or 3days old dishes.

As for moving and lifting. . .the Mexicans at the hardware store, God bless 'em. For $10 an hour, I can get my whole apartment with me inside sef moved without having to play washerwoman for one filthy pig.

Thank you Jesus!!

Sisi_Kill:

That's why you never leave home without your Triple A card. For $60.00 a year, I get my tires fixed without having to wash toilet or 3days old dishes.

As for moving and lifting. . .the Mexicans at the hardware store, God bless 'em. For $10 an hour, I can get my whole apartment with me inside sef moved without having to play washerwoman for one filthy pig.

Thank you Jesus!!

Na wa o!!

I personally can`t habitate in a dirty environment without getting sick but at the same time i can`t do house chores simply because i don`t feel it`s right for me. And to answer Op`s question, i`d gladly wanna move on with a sexy lady who can cook and clean. Extra cerebral features will speed up the process. I`d be the luckyest man to marry a woman who has all that.

dayokanu: ^^ if you visit your gf, there would always be something to help her with, Just like when the girl visit and there is always something to fix in your house

Whether its repositioning the couch, fixing her light bulb, lifting heavy stuffs bought, Making her TV clearer by just adjusting cable, changing the oil in her car, fixing electrical issues etc.

So its not just one off.

Most women dont even know a thing about anything electrical, mechanical etc. The moment they start a car and it doesnt kick, they are stuck. Its their bf thats the first point of call before the mechanic. Even after calling the handyman Most women would feel comfortable leaving their bf to handle the mechanic and electrician while they do something else.

I believe in a relationship there is always room for helping one another out.

if you are going on a journey with a boyfriend and it involves long distance drive, I am sure most women lets say 70% would just relax their seat and the guy would drive, while its the girl that would make hotel reservation etc That does not mean they are slaves its called helping out.

If you bf stands and watches you struggling with a heavy load, I am sure many women would come here and call him names

Abeg! Abeg! Enough with the women are not good with electronics myth. Yeah maybe in the old days where we didn't have information at our fingertips but definitely not today. This past weekend, I rooted my kindle fire by myself. . .following the instructions from a youtube video.

My car starts flashing some light I don't understand. . .I google that shite out. I'll even be one telling the guys at the workshop this is what is wrong with it. Except someone is completely BRAIN DEAD, there is nothing they can't do.

Basically, I am say there is no relationship quid pro quo condition out there that would put me in the position of washing filthy bathroom everyday and picking up after a grownass man.

Now I am not saying I won't do the occasional clean up here and there but turn myself to some vacuum cleaner wielding, dishwashing, socks picking, toilet washing robot for one filthy pig just because he can change a light bulb. . .HELL NO!!

Ileke-IdI:


Na wa o!!

Why the sad face Ruby?

These men are there looking for work.

Sisi_Kill:

Why the sad face Ruby?

These men are there looking for work.

Well true. lol
It's just sad and stereotypical Just $10?


Please don't mind Dayo. Dayo believes that women NEED men.

Ileke-IdI:


Well true. lol
It's just sad and stereotypical Just $10?


Please don't mind Dayo. Dayo believes that women NEED men.

You think they dont? Considering the number of "I need a husband" thread that pops up even though a large number dont even admit

dayokanu:

You think they dont? Considering the number of "I need a husband" thread that pops up even though a large number dont even admit

They don't. WANT is different from NEED.

I thought I taught you that a long time ago