Exactly why we advise single men to avoid baby mamas. The real father will always be in the picture. You can't deny him that right from seeing his real daughter .
That's very wrong. I know many people married and staying in parents home with their wives and there is nothing like that tagging witch thing. I guess you just watch too much Nollywood movies. As a matter of fact most of the ladies I know are taken as eggs by their inlaws in the home.
Thank you. But 419 everywhere. I no fit trust you.
I'm not asking you to trust me . I didn't demand for money or request any payment from you. If you've successfully rectified it good and fine. This came to my mind too even before I made the post
You guys are just foaming in the mouth. These people already served us food and we ate.
I don't really think we need bread again to take home.
Lack of emotional intelligence laced with stupid foolery . Who gives his would be in-laws biscuit and juice on a first visit. If you don't know, that your gift is awkward and they returned same energy.
Jewessgratitud3: I just thought to share and again it's no bodys business what I share about myself here. I chose to do it and don't care if it sits well with anyone or not. My life, my share .
I'm sharing this just to let some ladies know that being a widower doesn't break a man and will not stop him from being an unrepentant cheat if he wants to. I used to think a widower will be more responsible and loyal to one woman considering the fact that he's now a second hand value bachelor and the death of his former wife will make him get closer and more committed to his spouse, home and family at large but I was wrong cos after my experience with one, I realized men will always be cheat men.
This happened in 2013 after staying away from relationships for a long time. So I joined Badoo ( it was the rave then, though I joined in 2012). A young man ( in his 40s then) chatted me up and I checked his profile. There he stated that he was looking for a lady for serious relationship and added he was a Christian. He was also looking very handsome and tall. We chatted and exchanged numbers.
When we got talking he told me he was a widower. It was hard to believe because he looked very young. He now told me he married very early. He went ahead and told me he has 6 children 👀👀👀. I didn't believe until he showed me their pics. 4 girls and two boys. He said the wife kept having children because she wanted a male child and died after giving birth to the last child, a male. She got home from the hospital after childbirth and started bleeding immediately and was rushed back to the hospital but never made it back. Meanwhile he was not in the country when this happened.
This made me have compassion and developed feelings for him. After a few months of inviting me over, I finally agreed to visit after he assured me the elder sister is staying with him to look after the baby ( he was already a year then but was not walking). He never liked the boy because he was always saying the boy caused his wifes death and each time the baby boy sees him, he'll be screaming due to the way he looks at the baby and I'll be telling him to stop, teasing him that it's him the boy resembles. So when I visited for the first time, I was shocked at what I saw. He actually owns the house he was living in in Sango. He built it when the going was good but after the wife's death, he came back and stayed for a whole year without a job. He just got the job he was doing as a hotel manager when I met him and his take home was not good at all. So to maintain the big house was a challenge. He could barely feed his kids. Even the two older ones were not with him. They were living with his brother just to ease him of the burden. when the sister saw me, she got angry and told him that he has not finished taking care of his children he's bringing in another lady. He told me to ignore the sister and face him. If I go there, I'll cook and serve everybody because he was always complaining of not having money but sometimes he'll give me part of the money I used.
Initially the children didn't like me and he said I should be buying them snacks. So then if I close from work, I'll go and meet him at his office and we'll go home together. I bought snacks and the children reluctantly collected the snacks. He went to work on that Saturday and I gathered the children and started telling them stories. They began to come close. When he got back he drove all of us to a football viewing center and bought me pepper soup. I thought I had found the right man. I was even saying I don't need to birth any children since he already has six. We'll just stay with his own children ( lol . small girl sense). He would tell me no, that he wants me to give him a beautiful daughter like me.
Six months into the relationship, I noticed something in his room while he was away at work. I saw a foreign prison card in his jacket I now began to connect the dots. I remembered him saying he was away when the wife died and while she was pregnant, he had problem abroad. So she developed BP. He even told me he wasn't around when his house was built that the wife supervised the whole thing before he now had a problem but be never told me what the problem was. I then discovered with the prison card, he was prolly in jail all that time. I didn't ask him anything.
Later he started telling me there's this single mother that has been begging him to marry her and she buys him stuff. I was like marry her now afterall two of una na second hand value. He'll laugh and say God forbid. That he wants chassis. The lady buys him and his children stuff. At a point I told him to stop collecting the gift or risk our relationship. He promised to stop.
One day he was sleeping and i was just going through his phone ( I never used to do that) and saw "my love". My head sparked. I woke him up with a heavy slap and showed him, he started saying its you I love. I said no! Tell me who this Is.. then I began to cry because I just knew it was over. He started begging and called his Aunty into the room. The aunty said the person is a family. I said call her. He now called the number and an elderly woman picked and he started telling her that I'm crying my eyes out here because I saw a message he sent to her. The woman spoke with me but I wasn't convinced. Throughout that night, he played "please forgive me' Brian Adams. hmm.. feeling nostalgic now. I calmed down and we continued.
After some months my chairman sacked me because I refused to go out with him and told him I'm in a relationship. After I lost my job I reduced my visits because bus fare from mainland to Sango was quite expensive and he too could not sponsor my visits regularly due to so much financial responsibilities and since I had been the one doing it when I was working. It became a once in a while thing.
Then one day, he told me to come to his office let's go home that he has missed me. I asked him, do you have money he said we'll manage. This man did not tell me we were going by train ( chai things we do for love) from his office we set out to oshodi. This man put head for train lane. I said waaaat t... I almost went back but it was already getting dark. I entered train for the first time. See me shaking. He had to hold me before one man now stood up for me to sit. Because it's been a while I've been to the house, when we got home, the aunty said you'll not stay in one place. Today you carry this, tomorrow you carry another one. I told him what the sister said and he told me not to mind her. In my mind i was like... see this second wen I dey manage too wan dey play ... I kept asking until he now confessed that the Aunt was referring to the other single mother that the lady has been forcing herself on him but it's me he wants. There and then I zeroed my mind.
After that visit, as we were going that morning, we quarreled on the way because the vehicle we borded got spoilt plus I wasn't happy after hearing what the sister said. So I was just edgy that morning and blasted the driver and some of the passengers. He got angry and left after trying to get me off the bus and I refused, saying I should run after him cos he's running late for work. I was just looking at him. I didn't get down. I waited for him to go far, I now got down and took another route to my house.
I didn't call for a week and refused to pick his calls because whats the point killing myself over a widower with six children who has refused to stick with one woman. When I eventually picked, it was my guy ( now ex) who told me to pick in the bus that day we were going to camp and he was chyking me. Oga kept calling and as usual I ignored him but the sound was disturbing our conversation so my gy told me to pick and hear him out. I picked and he was crying and put all his children on the phone to beg me. He said they are missing me and one of them is sick. I said ok, I'll call you later. That was it. I blocked him. Went to Badoo and blocked him there in fact I deleted my Badoo account. Deleted his number and ended the whole thing..
Men will always be men
Modified
When I said all men are the same what I'm simply implying is, whether they are poor, rich, widower or handicapped they will still cheat or have that tendency to cheat. Take it or get lost!
A man's vulnerability doesn't stop him from exhibiting those bad habits (cheating and deception). They'll will always do that thing that make us call them meennnn... If you know what I mean and if you don't Gerrit, forget abourit. .
It is delusional to think a widower is a 2nd hand values man. Widows and baby mamas are and not widowers or Babadaddies
Mikefrik: So do they now have network? Yeye people. Lost the sim card I used to open my NIN, this nonsense ACCESS BANK people told me that I had to upgrade my acc. Till now no network on NIN just to change phone no. Later now they'll say it's #15,000 to update phone no on NIN. God punish Tinubu and those who voted for him.
Have you retrieved your NIN back now ? if it's the NIN you need i can ASSIST you with that.
If u believe an Achebe books will ever be rated above that of Williams, omo, u must believe dragons once existed
Reading to reply devoid of understanding. The title clearly specified "Novels" . Mention any novel written by Shakespeare since Achebe being there is your problem. Why isn't any of the other novels a problem for ranking above "Shakespeare" even though the list isn't one Shakespeare fits in.
You all see the problem now with all these Pseudo-intellectuals
turmacs: Also evacuate the Israelites from Palestinian lands, the Same way you brought them there in 1948 using false claims from a fictional book..
Israel was not a country until 1948. I don't believe in Christianity or Islam because both of them are man made disasters
I believe is truth, humanity and common sense.
Some people have been saying Israel has offered Palestinian independence in the past, two state solution e.t.c and they rejected. Who would agree to that nonsense? How can you come to claim someone else's land and when problem breaks out, you begin to say that "the only solution is to split the land in two"? That even further proves that Israelis are not the owners of that land. Even in the Bible, the story of king Solomon and the two mothers, The woman who was not the real mother of the baby was the one suggesting that the baby be spit in two.
Read History and not the Bible . The Jews have been living in that land even before the Romans came and destroy the land . It was during the Roman period that the name Palestine came into being . The end of the Roman empire brought in the ottoman rule that lasted over a thousand years and the subsequent introduction of islam and conquering of the lands.
Fancy explaining how Israel stole Palestine land or you want to keep spouting nonsense here. Israel have always whacked Hamas but you lot are always fast to sob on the media space about Israel abuse. This is the start. There's more in store!
Take up History lesson and stop being emotional. The land was never called Palestine not until about 7th Century when the Romans took over. All through the period before the Romans , Jews were living there and even during the Roman sacking of the city of Jerusalem were still there.
The rise of and domination of the entire land was nothing other than the result of the rise of the Ottoman empire that lasted over a thousand years.
this is crazy. At the early onset all these would have been avoided had the two-state solutions been accepted by all . The Arab neighbours were not ready to accept that either cos of their own selfish interest.
I've made a video of the top 10 Hamas attack in Israel including the present. Watch and Subscribe please.
The hypocrisy and apartheid stink to high heavens!
Forget the optics, you will just die for nothing.
Your citizens are now human shields, you kill the Palestinian freedom fighters, you kill your own citizens in their multitude. There will be serious negotiations and Isreal will stop further settlement expansions. It's insane that what we speak against in Ukraine is what we deny in Palestine. We are all humans. Stop the injustice for the sake of humanity.
lol, there will be no negotiation . Those diplomacy and UN sanctions , article this and that bla bla doesn't apply to Israel. A country formed from war and been in one for 75 years will continue to defend itself by any means necessary unfortunately. Two states solution was proposed from the onset but the arabs refused it, alas it's too late now . Till you and i go die in old age, there won't be peace in palestine
This kind of entitlement mentality is very very wrong
It is not entitlement oga. Everything isn't entitlement. The boy is a dependant for now and as such , the little the elder brother could do is to support him.
As little as asking him has he eaten isn't out of place. Everything is not entitlement. At this point, his brother is responsible for him.