Jewessgratitud3:
Right now she needs advice on what to do and I'm also going to be sharing what I have advised her so far.

This man has used his foolishness to implicate my sister and their lovely kids. Before I go into details of what happened recently, I'll like to give a quick backstory of how all these came to be and how she even got herself into this mess

Backtrack to 2014 when she broke the news that someone was coming to see the family for her hand, I asked her who the person was but she refused to tell me saying I'll meet him when he comes. I was now like ha... This one you're hiding it. I never knew it was one useless guy that was living in our former area in the early 2000s that all he does then was stand at junctions disturbing girls. He also disturbed me one period like that and I so much dislike him because of his behavior plus he's fair and I dont fancy fair guys.

The day came and we started cooking. Already I had gotten a hint from my eldest sister that it's the guy and I said was that why she was hiding it? What's my own there. We move. As the day was approaching, my idowus husband called and told me to warn my sister that that guy she's pulling with is not it. That if she's trying to have something serious with him she'll be making a big mistake. I said, she's an adult and can make choices for herself.


He came with his people and we did everything and she moved in with him. Now, this guy doesn't do anything. He claims he's a lawyer but never goes to work. Most times he'll go for early morning training by 6am and after everyone has gone to work, he'll come home and be sleeping. initially my sister was covering him up that he's doing something but anytime I visit after school, I'll always meet him at home sleeping. I knew my sis was just covering him.

Before they married my sister owned a school that was doing well. After her first child the school was still doing well but they started having issues because she was the one bearing most of the financial burden in the house. Sometimes she would come to school with bruises on her face. Since she refused to talk, me I didn't bother asking because if I do she'll bark at me.it continue like that until she could no longer bear it and started opening up to me that the guy doesn't do anything. Just goes about from one junction to the other.

She took in for her second child and fell sick. The school suffered mismanagement and folded up. That was when the guy showed her his true color. They fought to the extent she left her kids and went to my sister's house. My elder sisters husband settled them and she went back.

She had her third child and the guy started his madness again. This time he would leave them and go for hours without food. When he's coming at night he'll buy food and call his children to come eat and leave my sister hungry. So anytime I go there I'll just find her something to eat. Sometimes not always.
The day I said enough is enough and decided to pull her out of that nonsense was the day she called me, I was in a bus and she said for two days now she has not eaten anything and she's having headache. That the guy said he'll deal with her. I told her to hold on and sent her the little I could that I'll come and see her.

I got there and told her she can't continue like this . I told her to start following me to school to learn how to do what I'm doing and I'll be giving her small small daily pay any day she goes with me and later she can start sourcing for her own schools and be making her own money. I put her through and took her to a school immediately and assigned her to some classes after watching me for a few mins.

We did that for a few weeks and I was giving her the small thing I could after each day. She started going out to look for schools and two schools called her. She now said she can't be following me again , I said no problem. God helped her, She now got more schools and started selling books too and making money.
When this guy saw it, he left feeding and only buys food for the children once in a while. Meanwhile their fighting continued.

Fast-forward to last year, the landlord called my sister that he has given the husband quit notice, not because he was owing but because he was always disrespecting the landlord. My sister tried to plead but he said it's not because of my sister but the husband. Now this guy's is so troublesome and brags a lot. He quarrels with the landlord a lot and always goes against the rules of the compound. I on the other hand have been telling my twin now that she has the money to get her own apartment and leave the lazy thing but she remained there.


Last two weeks Tuesday. during that heavy downpour, the landlord came with some police men and threw their things out in the rain as she was preparing her children for school. It was one of the police men that now had pity on her and said they should leave the things in the compound instead of throwing outside in the rain and helped my sister to bring then inside the gate. The husband ran away. After everything he called my sister to bring the children somewhere. When she got there it was a friend's house. He begged them to let his family stay the night and till now he's still there. I told my sister, shey I've been warning you about this guy. Bett look for a place and move in before this one's change their mind. Could you believe this man continued his laziness there? When everyone has gone out he'll go there and start sleeping till they come back from work and meet him. My sister said he has started quarrelling the man's wife . Someone who's squatting you you're challenging them.

he's talking about moving them to Mowe but my sister is not buying the idea and says she wants to get an apartment here on the mainland because of her job and move with only her children but I'm of the opinion that she should leave the children with him because if she goes with the children he'll run from his responsibility and never pay their school fees again.

What should she do because the guy travelled for his brothers burial now and the owner of the house was heard asking the wife why the guy and my sister are still in their house and said let him come back first . Meaning they are tired.

I've told her to get an apartment now o.

seunmsg:
If I ever become the president, I won’t join any celebration to honor Gandhi. He was a well documented racist with special hatred for blacks.

Righteousness2:


Go and marry one also na. Who is holding you?

EmiDon11:
i dont know why i find the bolded funny

einsteine:


No temporary insanity defence in Nigeria. This is not an American film.

If he killed upon discovery, he can argue provocation but if he carried a knife because he was suspicious, even before catching them, then provocation would be hard to argue. Most situations like this where the accused went free, the killing weapon was gotten at the exact scene of the discovery, so it's easy to argue provocation.

VeryWickedGoat:
Can we see his pics?
Same way they lied Bin Laden was killed when he is chilling on an island till this very day.

Multiplier7:
They're looking for means to ban twitter again. Simple

hopefulLandlord:
"You shall not die" they prayed from a small country located off the coast of West Africa to a god that resides in Israel, likes mount Horeb, called the Jewish people his chosen ones and promises "new Jerusalem"

They prayed to a god that saw nothing wrong in slavery and works in mysterious ways, so mysterious that it's totally indistinguishable from random chance. Nothing fails like prayer
You would have the same success praying to a milk jug as you do praying to god -- the milk jug sometimes answers your prayer the way you want to, sometimes not and sometimes the answer is delayed. See the problem here? If things turn out the way you want them to, you say it was because you prayed. If not, it's because god knows what's best and you didn't pray for the right thing. Or, if it happens 10 years later you say god answered your prayer, it was just delayed. This is nonsense.


Nigeria is filled with a population that prays against poverty, only for her to be declared the poverty capital of the world http://punchng.com/with-87m-poor-citizens-nigeria-overtakes-india-as-worlds-poverty-capital/ a sign that the prayer worked

This is also why Nigerians keep praying for long life and our life expectancy keeps dropping which is now 54.5 years (the 7th lowest in the world) while a prayerless Japan comprising of atheist majority has a life expectancy of 83.7 years (highest in the world)
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_by_life_expectancy

This is also why Nigeria is filled with a population that all claim to be "God Fearing" but has the 14th highest crime rate in the world while an atheist Japan filled with "sinners" "Reprobate" "people who don't fear god" "heathens" "infidels" have the lowest crime rate in the world https://www.numbeo.com/crime/rankings_by_country.jsp


Keep praying my brothers and sisters. prayer is the key like my DP suggests

nijaomegacode:
[b][/b]they are useless: ALL OF THEM!

chatinent:
There's a difference between a bingo and a dog.

Yusfunoble:
Bozzo

dannyla:
I want to call it quits but everyone around me feels it's a mistake and he is saying everything out of anger and if I'm patient enough, he will change completely.

I must admit that he has changed alot since we met but the progress compared to the timeframe and the heat I face everyday is nothing to write home about.

He loves me to a fault and I don't know if I can find someone who loves me like him but his other attitude is sniffing life out of me.

dannyla:
I opened a new account to remain anonymous.
This story is a bit long but pls bear with me.

I met this man almost 2yrs ago at an event a friend invited me to. The next week, he collected my number from my friend and called me, we began talking from there and agreed to go on a date. He proposed marriage to me on the first date which I rejected. I told him that I can't marry outside my church and from the little I've heard from him, our life dreams differ. I decided to cut him off from that day and I stayed away for about 3months. Meanwhile he got my friend to introduce him to my sis, mum and another friend who happened to be from his place, I'll call her Grace.
He made them all aware of his intent towards me and my stand and asked for their help to change my mind. Grace became his biggest ally and convinced me to have another date. He asked that we date for a while and see if we can work out our differences. During the date I noticed he has a very hot and quick temper and he listens to gossip a lot so I do tell Gracethat I don't see a future with him but he was too persistent, Grace always had words of encouragement and considering the fact that for some strange reason, it was mainly married men always approach me for a relationship with stories of how they got married to a wrong woman and they are or are almost divorced, dating a single man with no kids was very tempting and I decided to give it a try.

He asked me to tell him everything about me so there are no secrets between us and I did. Starting from secondary school to that day, I told him everything, from my first kiss, the colleague who tried to rape me, my ex who lied about his marital status and disvirgined me etc. he did the same too and I felt a burden roll off my shoulder.

Few days later I began to notice changes in him especially towards my business. I thrive in a male dominated industry in a ratio of 9men to 1woman. He asked me to show him the pictures of my colleagues which I did, he also asked if they make passes at me which I said is almost inevitable but my boundaries are clear and rigid.

Fast forward to now. I noticed that whenever I drop my phone, he goes through it. Facebook, sms, WhatsApp etc. He even picks my call when I'm not close to the phone. He asked me about a certain colleague who cracks dirty jokes like how I rushed to get married (I told him I'm already married). I didn't think much about it.

He later began to complain about my partners and how I'm sleeping with them like the prostitute I am, called me an unrepentant liar, unsubmisive, manipulating etc. Said he regrets asking for my hand at all and he's just waiting forthe day he'll catch me redhanded so he can dump my sorry a*s.
I told him to end it now cus I'm fed up, family came in and I later found out that Grace has been telling a lot of lies against hoping to get him for herself as well as hate filled advises from some aggrieved friends who felt ladies from my tribe are no good and just there to "chop money". Apologies were said and received and we continued.

Another time I visited him and we had an argument, he gave me several heavy knocks on my head and I developed a headache and began to insult him which resultedin more heavy knocks. I broke up with him and left. Later my mum called him to ask why he laid his hands on me, he denied it swearing with his life. Said I insulted him and he lost his temper and insulted me back that he's sorry. He began to drop messages everywhere and I eventually gave in.

3rd incident happened on our way back from an event. He saw a message from a colleague he told me to stop doing business with cus he feels the man has his eyes on me which is totally not true. He flared up, stopped the car and was even threatening to beat me up. I came down from his car and stood by the roadside. He came down too and gave me the insult of my life in full public view and glare and told me to enter the car which I refused. I had no money on me and had to beg a stranger for money. By that time he was coming back, he quickly took a picture of both of us and sent it to everybody of how he caught me in the act with my lover on the road. He called me and said that if he must marry me, I must break my business sim card and look for a wife friendly occupation or sit at home.

He later apologised over it. Meanwhile he and my sis don't flow as before as he once called her a prostitute.

I want to call it quits but everyone around me feels it's a mistake and he is saying everything out of anger and if I'm patient enough, he will change completely.

I must admit that he has changed alot since we met but the progress compared to the timeframe and the heat I face everyday is nothing to write home about.

He loves me to a fault and I don't know if I can find someone who loves me like him but his other attitude is sniffing life out of me. Do I stay or quit?
Thanks for reading and pardon any typos

Biglittlelois:
A cheating wife AND a cheating husband is dangerous, I dislike one sided views

rawpadgin:
potential cheater spotted