Why Do Women Always Want To "Marry Up"?

sad. you see they want their women to have it. yet most of them don't feel good (some just pretend it's alright) when the lady is on top of the career game.
men sef wetin dey inside that their head 

my sister na true I talk.
not bashing the men folk but we sure don't need the efulefus amongst them

One person's perspective of men's fears when they are married to a woman who "married up".


90% of American women marry up.

Almost 90% of American women "marry up" to a man that earns more than they do. Coincidence? I think not.

What we see here is the typical gap between what women say (and may believe on a conscious level) and what they do (Some are conscious hypocrites, others choose wealthier men on a subconscious level, screening out less successful guys without even admitting it to themselves). Only a small minority of women at present (just over 10%) marry men who make less than them. They are the only ones who without a doubt chose men for themselves.

There is a thing called "falling in love within a framework" which means these women at a subconscious level only allow themselves to fall for men who meet their conditions in regard to success, wealth, etc. The other guys, no matter how nice, intelligent, good-natured, and self-assured, will get screened out before they are even seriously considered, in 90% of cases.

The one constant of life is that women, after you marry them, will always change. You think they are sexy and fair now? They will probably change after the wedding.

That's just the way it is, folks, no way to change it. Best thing is to look at the women's mom, married sisters, and how she was raised. That is a much better indicator than what she says when you date her.

Men lie to get sex. Women lie (like crazy) to get married. Oldest rule in the book. PS. Women will deny this all day long. Feel free to ignore their denials.



Women want access to the three options available only to women who marry up to more successful men (which the majority do):

1) To stay home to parent

2) To mix work and parenting to their liking

3) To work full-time, but with the option to switch to either of the first two options at any time.

This is only possible if the woman is married to a man who financially subsides these choices. Then there's the after marriage option:

4) If she gets bored of him, divorce and ass-rape him in court.


http://www.nomarriage.com/marryup.html

who cares about marrying up or down, money is not a criteria for me to date a guy or marry him because i have mine, as long as he has no complex about it we'l prolly get along

wommen have failed to remember that they are trully equal with the man, but the man's place remains undisputable. it is true that men have to be humble; giving due respect to women's ideals, but it is also a give-and-take. it takes two to twist, and y'all know this.
yes this is Africa where traditions and culture dictate the pace, and as modern-western style creeps in by the minute, we cannot forget our roots. unless of course we are bastards.
nwando, omoge,. . . i'm looking for that woman that knows what to do when the statch spills out. where is clemcycul, and the rest. . .

Deep down every woman wants to respect and admire her husband, the respect grows when the woman feels her husband can do something she holds in high esteem better than she can.

So marrying up may not only be material it can be that the guy is smarter, more organised, speaks well, whatever,

Materiality is the bane of the day, that is why we seem to narrow it only to such issues, when a man cannot add value to the woman it brings about contempt and ceaseless quarells, please do not blame the female folk.  

yea complex becomes a major issue when u marry down

word!

whatever, i'm sure its no crime marrying up, i believe in one way or the other we all will/do. Cos there has to be something u see in the other person that makes u go for them. So by that u marry up, except u had "no choice"

@Coolisaac

I feel you jare.For the first time i totally disagree with so many of my fellow Nairalanders.Maybe we should try clarifying issues befor posting replies. Haba!

Marrying u simply means getting married while you still have age on your side.Abi?Oga poster?

I've just been laughing all through and i agree with almost all the ladies in the house.

I have personally dumped two girls who feel they have a better background than i do and now they are begging to come back but the door is close since i have picked someone from the low class and clean her up.

Currently she's a 200 level in the University and guys are all over her but she's so grateful to me for trusting in her ability and giving her a chance and we are happy together.

The only issue is that those who knew her before now are hissing around and saying all sort of things but i don't give a damn.

To her (my girl), she's hooked up with someone and God willing will be "marrying UP" in a matter of time.

Marry someone in your social class/league and you will be happier.You can then bought grow into what ever league you want to be in."Marrying Up" explains why men treat women the way they do in marriages in Nigeria.If you want to avoid it then please marry in your own league!

Dear poster,

if you say marry up, i think its elevating. why don't you say marry left, right, up and down because they hav so many men around. they are rather not thinking of getting married again.

AS FOR ME, I PREFER MARRYING UP, ANY WHICH WAY GOD WANTS IT FOR ME, I MEAN UP IN THE SENSE THAT THE GUY MUST HAVE A FUTURE(POSSIBILITIES,PROSPECTS)NOT A LOSER OR LIABILITY , I WANT AN ASSET.  SO BE IT IN JESUS NAME

First of all, it is VGC not VCG.

Either way, this makes a very interesting topic. i have heard people write about love, status, marrying in a higher league and all the likes.
Personally, love alone, does not make a marriage. Marriage based on love alone does not last. If you doubt me, check the 50% divorce rate in developed countries and compare with less than 2% rates in Africa e.g Nigeria(underdevloped).

If i were a woman, i would only marry a man who i can respect and a man who can dominate or take responsiblity (doesnt mean he controls the woman).
Paul Adefarasin once said that a woman can make you feel like the greatest man on earth, and she can also make you feel smaller than an ant, when a man does not take up responsibility. I believe this is what women want, not necessarily the money or for higher status. There are many ways a man can earn a woman's respect: He is rich(higher league), he is very responsible, he is a public personality( eg pastor, politician, sports personality etc). When he is not rich, he should be ambitious and enterprising.

How can a woman marry/respect a man who is lazy, timid and in a lower league, if she is not desperate?

me i think my lady too is "marrying up to me"

anyone who doesn't believe a lady should marry up should allow his sisters marry any way they want.