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Bblak (f)
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May God 4give us all 
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fakande (m)
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@davidylan: Before the advent of the White missionary journey what was the means of marriage in Africa? What the Hell are you talking about? Are you saying that Traditional marriage has no VALUE anymore in our African traditions and CULTUERE? In the Olden days there was nothing like Church and Court Weddings, so Why all this NONSENSE TALK ABOUT CHURCH WEDDING?
I will simply ask you to please STOP Minimizing,insulting and provoking we Real Africans.Our Cultures has come to Stay and No one Not even Lusifer himself can stop our African culture,after the traditional wedding the lady in question is yours for enjoying and child bearing, if she and anyone else don't want to RESPECT that tradition then she has no choice than to go and marry white men with their white,dirty,useless,Fornication culture? Nonsense
Unfortunately my friend, these are not the old days. Culture and tradition are constantly evolving. Tradition only became so because a certain people adopted a certain way or procedure of doing things. Over time, however, newer ways have evolved and those, at various stages became "tradition." You will agree with me that even in the so-called "traditional" marriages, hardly any mention is made to age long deities and demi-gods. Rather, any recourse to divinity is made to the Muslim or Christian God. So, while such ceremonies essentially retain age-long procedure, (breaking of kola, palm wine carrying etc) they are more or less ceremonial in nature and nothing more, which is why most people still resort to the Church or the mosque for the "real" wedding. |
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Echidime (m)
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@fakande: Is that what you think or what you feel? GOD has so many names by which he can be addressed or called upon,age long deities and demi-gods as you call it is the same GOD White men call GOD in English,DIEU or SEIGNEUR In french or JEHOVA in Jewish. When Africans carry palm vine and break kola nut,they call upon God in their respective dialete,in Igbo they call him Chukwu,Chineke,onyekere uwa,Chukwu Okike,chukwu Abiama,In yoruba land God's Names are inumerable sames goes to the Hausa's same goes to different traditions and cultures,so stop been confused my brother and appreciate GOD in his Infinite Wisdom and mercy,and thank him for his Numerous names in his creations.
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trukoments (m)
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"whom the gods want to destroy,they first make him forget his culture/tradition", so the saying goes!do we (africans), hnmmm NO! (NIGERIANS) really stop to think why we are specially created on the continent rather than in europe or elsewhere,few of us ever do,culture is purely mans attempt to relate with his creator through the study of his environment. Christianity and islam was spead into other parts of the world by arabs and europeans.these two faiths are purely a form of colonisation,which brought much good to us anyway but through sweat and blood.its like western education,it was never an accident,pidgin/english language was introduced so that the colonial masters can futher exploit us once there is effective means of communication.religion/faith is like a babys walker,once the baby learns how to walk,he/she discards it because it is no longer needed.
its like what was written in the bible 'thou shalt not steal',it is not that God is afraid we are going to steal his things,NO!NO!NO!these laws are made for us,they are only in place to promote peaceful coexistence among men/women alike.if i know someone steals my things,i would fight back.
marriage becomes binding and blessed once the two involved have a clear intention to marry each other,then comes parantal consent if the parents are alive,the rest like alter wedding,mosque etc is an attempt for the couples to announce that so and so have been joined as huzzy and wifey,contest this satements!
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Echidime (m)
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@http://www.nairaland.com/nigeria?action=profile;u=67022
Your the son of your Father.
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gosky (m)
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This is my opinion on the thread: it is very proper to start aving sex with your wife after the court and the traditional wedding, this is recognised by many instances of marriage that took place in the scriptures, nonetheless; if you still intend to go for church wedding what you do is called MARRIAGE BLESSING, because it will be deceptive to wear white garment signifying that you have not been defiled whereas you two have been sleeping together. in marriage bleesing you can where anything or even dress traditionally. My advice is this: if you wish to go for the real white wedding, it is wise to honour God with the bed undefiled(heb13:2-3), you could do the three all within 1 week to minimise the temptation, (thats what most sincere christians do). When doing the right thing lets do it the right way
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silsane (f)
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for the people saying, you're not married till u do a church wedding, what happens to muslims and people of other faith who don't do a church or white wedding? is their marriage a sham?
Marriage and marriage ceremonies started long before the birth of the church, and ss long as u've done d necessary rites- be it in d court or traditionally - y'all are married. After all, the Bible recognises the laws of the land. Didn't , 'give to caesar what belongs to caesar, ?'
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kollyp2000 (m)
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Easier said than done, How many of those that are clamouring for white wedding is a Virgin Mary here? why don't you signify and tell us your age?  It is not by power |
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romeo (m)
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It's like we have one voice on this issue  |
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+osisi
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check the votes,1/3rd said no chopping.  |
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grafikdon (m)
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It is visible to the blind and audible to the deaf that God has no beef with our Afro traditional wedding.
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dot2002 (f)
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Its not fornication in as much as it is tenable under the law just like church or court marriage. At the point of traditional marriage whoever preside over the union has power equivalent to that of any man of God. the word is according to ever green Ebenezer 'what God has joined together, let no man put asunder' in traditional wedding they pray in God's name and that is what is important.
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shockz (m)
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yo no way. how can that be fornication. its not ppossible. the man and the chik hav joined together and hav recived blessings from both parents. omo, no long thing
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~Lady~ (f)
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@yemivictor
u dumb bloke, do u even know what am agreeing to?
It had nothing to do u with u. I didn't even know u posted.
Whatever is going on between u and iyes, is between u and iyes. Don't bring me into it.
I agreed to iyes' view not on the rebuttal he gave to u.
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~Lady~ (f)
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@ yemivictor
just so u know, below is the post i was agreeing with. last i checked it wasn't towards u.
Iyes wrote:
"As A Christian, I challenge anyone to show me where the requirement for marriage was stated as "blessing" by a priest or "man of God" in the Bible!
The issue is that over time, customs of people have crept into religion - and vice versa, such that where the custom is GLAMOROUS, it quickly and easily takes such a position that an average, or undeciphering public assumes it to be the correct thing.
My people, don't be deceived, the 3 ingredients of marriage are; 1.PARENTAL CONSENT (of the bride's family) which may or not be signified by a dowry, 2. WILLINGNESS OF THE 2 PARTIES (man and wife) and 3. witnesses to the agreement (which may not necessarily happen simultaneously). Once that is obtained/present, pronto, marriage is done deal, and recognised by GOD. The rest is human ceremony just to show off and belabour those involved.
It is unfortunate that we have exalted the "packaging" i.e. ceremonies (especially church service and reception, engagement, introduction etc) over and above the "core product" i.e. consent and willingness. To the extent that in many cases, those two elements are completely missing, and we still go ahead with the "wedding" and impose it on GOD.
It is not an omission that the Bible does not have a single account of a marriage where a priest presided or joined the couple!! Not even Jesus, he never superintended any wedding or ceremony. Remember, at Cana in Galilee, he was a guest at a wedding, he was not even invited to the high table, let alone conduct the wedding.
GOD is very simple and wants things the easiest way for us as his creatures, but the problem with us is that we have always found ways to complicate issues for ourselves, up to the point that it becomes excessively burdensome and sometimes unbearable for many others, up to the point that we push many to sin in the process. Consider how many have committed sins just to meet up with human standards of "marriage" such as high bride price, cost of rings and dresses/suits, white wedding expenses and receptions, honeymoons etc. while GOD's standard costs nothing, and demands next to nothing.
My brother, if you've done traditional wedding otherwise called engagement, YOU ARE BONA FIDE MARRIED. That has satisfied GOD's standard for marriage as you have fulfilled all righteousness. The 3 ingredients are complete; Bride's Parental Consent, Couple's Willingness, and Witnesses to the union's agreement. Go ahead and fire on, for you are married before the Almighty. Let no one shackle you unnecessarily.
No wonder Jesus says " my yoke is easy, and my burden is light", and who makes them "heavily laden"? The human society!
May GOD have mercy on us all. "
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hibroheem (m)
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The misconception we people have about traditional wedding is affecting us. Maybe it is because of the level of our understanding of English grammar or religious sentiments. What is traditional wedding itself if I may ask? Is it the mode of dressing or the way and manner in which it is being conducted? Does it matter when you wear your aso oke to your wedding venue i.e mosque or church? If wearing white signifies purity, what is the fate of the man who wear dark suit? If you wear western attires or your traditional ones to your wedding venue there is nothing wrong about that so it is in a church or mosque. So go ahead and enjoy your lives.
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BlackEbony (m)
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No its not, depending on your stand point, first of all if you as a person decide to have your marriage solemnized by the traditional institution (blessings from the bride's parents or their proxy) only your choice, that is ok but if you decide to take it further to the church after the traditional rites had been performed fine also, I can liken it to the different stages of ICAN or any other professional exams if you decide to stop half way you would get a certificate for what you have done & passed and if you decide to take it all the way to the end you would equally get a certificate but one is highly regarded than the other, I submit to you that the most important thing in a marriage is the approval or blessings of the parents of the bride or their proxy in the case of the demise of both parents thank you, gbaaaam! shikena! o pari!
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real_demi (f)
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Truth about Marriage that most of us Xtains don't know is that marriage is just the way ~ Lady~ has put it. Once the two parties are consenting, the two parents of the parties involved are willing and there are witnesses present, pronto, u have a wedding!!!
The garb u don and the venue of blessing is non-relevant.
However, i realise that many religious folks cringe at the thot of the post. If it will make u feel better, have a man of God to pray for you and bless your rings at the trad wedding so that u know u are 'legal' for consummation. If u will still have a white wedding and your conscience is not at ease, then don't do it. The Bible says that anything that is done without faith is sin. If u don't believe it, don't do it.
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lasmiles (f)
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well, as 4 me ooooooooo, i don't think there is a problem with that , in as much as the bride price has been paid, and the 2 believe they are now one,wht are they waiting forrrrrrrrrr
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kempo (m)
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What is wrong with us Africans. The problem is that we don't believe in ourselves. The moment the bride gives the groom drink before the public, marriage has been recorded in heaven. The white wedding is just to crown it as our Christian dogma requests.
No wonder why one Noble laureate said " WHEN THE WHITE MEN CAME TO AFRICA, WE HAD THE LAND AND THEY HAD THE BIBLE, THEN THEY SAID LET US PRAY, WHEN WE OPENED OUR EYES AFTER THE PRAYER THEY HAD THE LAND AND WE HAD THE BIBLE"
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oziomatv (m)
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What is wrong with us Africans. The problem is that we don't believe in ourselves. The moment the bride gives the groom drink before the public, marriage has been recorded in heaven. The white wedding is just to crown it as our Christian dogma requests.
No wonder why one Noble laureate said " WHEN THE WHITE MEN CAME TO AFRICA, WE HAD THE LAND AND THEY HAD THE BIBLE, THEN THEY SAID LET US PRAY, WHEN WE OPENED OUR EYES AFTER THE PRAYER THEY HAD THE LAND AND WE HAD THE BIBLE"
ARE YOU SAYING THEY PLAYED 419 ON US? |
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FBS
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chey, I love Nigerians, !!! you people funny!
but where is it written in the bible that you must do your marriage is a church?
How many marriages in the bibles took place in a church?
God can bless your UNION, anywhere and any day!
Court marriages mean that by the laws of the land, you are allowed to insert your sim card into her phone!
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yemivictor (m)
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@yemivictor u dumb bloke, do u even know what am agreeing to? It had nothing to do u with u. I didn't even know u posted. Whatever is going on between u and iyes, is between u and iyes. Don't bring me into it. I agreed to iyes' view not on the rebuttal he gave to u. @ Lady,Iyes's view on what aspect of his epistle? And you have to call me a dumb bloke abi? you this dumb and stupid broad! Bring it on!!  |
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yemivictor (m)
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@ Lady,
It is really funny to know that you subscribe to the entire epistle. It shows you are very shallow in thought.
Because the bible doesn't make any mention of a priest or pastor blessing the union of a "christian" couple (according to your boyfriend iyes anyway) now means you should submit yourself to ayilala of your dibia when you want to get married?
If you're a christian and not yet married, that is?
Big shame on you! LOL! shakes head and walks away!
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to me
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Hey, lets all quit the pretence.its not in all the traditional wedding that they invoke strange spirits.Even nowadays you have elders pray to God to bless the marriage. So What about those who get married at the registry and that is all.are they also in sin? Thou shall leave your father and mother and cleave to your wife,thats what the bible says. Some people are just playing holy holy whereas they are not even near it in any way |
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Kenny (m)
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If you prefer to go the to altar of God for blessings (after the Traditional wedding), and do lovemaking you offend God. Since you have endured that long, why not to the end. If you prefer not to go to the Church you are on your own.
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babalawo (m)
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As far as i am concerned i did my wedding in the shrine.
And Songo wont ask u if u have debited your wife before
because debiting before the wedding does not make u strong and does not make any body sad too
My Songo believes in sexual compatibility before wedding
i recall i was suppose to have married in 2003 but we were not sexually compatible so we broke up
Am enjoying my sex life or marriage u call it now-MANY thanks to the enlightenment of Shongo
You too can experience same
come with with to the shrine
BABALAWO BABALAWO BABALAWO
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iyes (m)
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@ HERO111;
Can you kindly support your claim that a marriage is not recognised by God unless it is done in a church, or "blessed" by a priest/pastor with any Biblical quote or reference?
If not, do you think carrying out the ritual of wedding within the premises of a church, or by a priest/pastor proclaiming that "you are now man and wife" makes a wedding any more valid than sitting in a lecture room in a university making anyone a student?
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kaecy5 (m)
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where is it written in the bible that you must do your marriage is a church?
sorry to be sarcastic but we have a lot of intelligent dumb folks in our country that can talk and talk empty can any of the church approvers, show me where it is written in the bible that u must marry in a church? (exact quotations) if u can't then, why has the church introduced its own tradition and evolved it over time from when the white man started it?, |
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davidylan (m)
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@ Kaecy5 . . . can you show me where in the bible smoking a cigarette is said to be a sin?
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kaecy5 (m)
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so do u think smoking is a sin??
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