Bank Phb Recruting

[color=#006600]Exciting Job Opportunities in the Niger Delta

 Our client, a Niger Delta Militant Group with branches in strategic

 locations throughout all the six South-South states of Nigeria is seeking

 to expand its operations to Abuja , the Federal Capital territory. This

 expansion has brought about vacancies for qualified and experienced young

 officers. The positions are:

 

 Area Head, Kidnapping:

 

 The successful applicant who will report to the Executive Council, and the

 Executive Director, Abuja , is expected to possess the following

 competencies:

 

 1) Minimum of 10 years experience in militant agitation. (Membership of

 Al-qaeda, Hamas or other similar organisation will be an added advantage)

 

 2) Fluent knowledge of Hausa, Ijaw, English, Italian and German

 

 3) Expert ability to distinguish between Oyinbos and Albinos

 

 4) Ability to swim in deep waters

 

 5) Ability to recognise fake/marked naira notes by sight

 

 6) Ability to easily recognise all Senators and Ministers of the Federal

  Republic of Nigeria .

 

 Evidence of previous successful kidnap of BIG MEN must be provided

 (pictures preferable)

 

 

 Photographer:

 

 1) Minimum of 5 years experience taking photos in war zones. (Domestic

 fights do not qualify as war zones for these purposes)

 

 2) Proficiency in the use of explosives as camera lighting.

 

 3) Knowledge of the different skin tones of expatriates, as an aid to

 taking high-quality pictures, is a must.

 

 4) Proficiency in the use of Adobe Photoshop, and Internet photo uploading

 software is a must.

 

 Please include a portfolio of previous photo-samples (must contain

 kidnapped persons OR be taken in war-zones OR be nightshots in blackspots

 like Oshodi, 3rd Mainland bridge, Apongbon, etc)

 

 

 Militant Trainee:

 

 1) Candidates must be between the ages of 13 and 50, be at least 4m tall,

 and may be male or female.

 

 2) Minimum of Nursery School/Kindergarten certificate.

 

 3) Jobless university graduates, and serving policemen will be given

 special consideration.

 

 4) Possession of jungle boots and face mask is a must.

 

 5) Preference will be given to persons with knowledge of foreign European

 languages, and persons with the ability to swim.

 

 

 Renumeration:

 

 Very attractive, competitive, and comparable with industry standards

 (payments in foreign currencies).

 

 Official guns, boats and grenades will be provided.

 

 Excellent training, involving offshore secondment ( Iraq , Afghanistan etc)

 from time to time

 

 Regular appearance on CNN, Alaaroye, Time Magazine, The Economist and

 other International magazines.

 

 Excellent networking opportunities with Nigerian politicians, oil

 magnates, and foreign businessmen.

 

 

 Interested applicants should forward their applications and detailed

 curriculum militae within two weeks to:

 militant_recruitmen t@OsamaConsultin g.com

 

 

, It Will Always Get Better not Bitter,

                      , Remember, Keep Hope Alive,
 [/color]

JOB TITLE RELATIONSHIP OFFICERS/ MANAGERS
LOCATION Nationwide
DEPARTMENT Commercial/ Retail Banking
JOB DESCRIPTION Ensure achievement of established market goals / objectives through facilitating the development of effective marketing strategies and overseeing the implementation of such strategies.
JOB CONDITION(S) N/A
EMPLOYMENT TYPE Permanent
QUALIFICATIONS Minimum of a Second Class Degree from a reputable University
REQUIRED SKILLS Product/Market Competencies; NegotiationSkills; Oral & Written Communication Skills; Strong Leadership Skills; Pleasant Personality & Excellent Customer Service orientation
EMPLOYMENT LEVEL Non Entry Level
CLOSING DATE Monday, January 28, 2008
click the link below to apply

http://eservices.bankphb.com/recruiter/vacancies.aspx

please we are not hear to joke, interested in jokes please visit the JOKES column

daniyella u no go kill me with laugh. abeg keep it up,  who knows,you can make it big as a comedian.  nobody wey no get talent, if you want to know the kind of talent you have ,just smoke igbo. If you are smoking igbo for the first time,your first misbehaviour afterwards is your talent. some people after them smoke igbo them go dey sing;na their talent. some people fit off clothes those ones talent na dry cleaning, and stuffs like that. choko niceooooooooooooo choko sweetoooooooo

Hai davidfajum on your bankphb post is it 4 those with banking experience.i have summitted my cv online b/4 and they gave me an id no. i don't have banking experience but i have marketing experience .plz advice me can i apply. can double application disqualify one.

daniyelle or what Is this an evidence of joblessness. Some one did good by giving a helpful info and you go cracking sill and annoying jokes on the same column. Do something with your time.

I got this information about recruitment from a senoir manager of the bank.Just post your cv as i directed.For trainee just submit your cv and for people already in a bank you can apply for relationship officer.All the best.

Bankphb online resume registration has a problem whenever you get to degree type in the econd page,it will select it for you,I have try it so many times,anybody hat has a solution should reply to this observation