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D-reloaded (f)
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Lmao AJ, I'm surprised you dad didnt give you a dirty slap. Lmao.  Gosh I'm so glad I wasnt a boarder, Ughhhh, then to talk of all girls school? Would have jumped into a well.  |
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Gamine (f)
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Hmm hmm With Five Girls and one mum How are we supposed to be locked in? Still we were not going to every club or party in town. I thank God for my Childhood sha, between the floggings we were naughty shait was so much fun. My world kind of collapsed when i entered Sec sch, Being a boarder for 6 years is no joke! i got a bit withdrawn didnt like girls, was tired of them chai! wahala species! Now i still don't relate well with girls.  my galfriends are not more than eight rather be with guys most times!!! |
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Chacal (m)
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Now i still don't relate well with girls. my galfriends are not more than eight rather be with guys most times!!! I feel your pain. . . . Opposites attract!! |
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Gamine (f)
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ehen na how God create am na!
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pahtahkee
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I was brought up with the most strict form of discipline I can not even explain it all. We were practically locked inside the house all the time. I was always the one waiting and praying for when my parents would leave the house then we can sneak out to play. Even at that, we had to time when they would be back. Whenever they go out like that, we would give them an interval of 15minutes before we rush out into the neighborhood to play ball, or beg for bicycle to ride, or see which babe eye fit look on. Whenever I see my fathers car from afar, you need to see the race I do display in order for him not see me. There have been numerous times he caught me outside due to the very sharp eye he has while in his car. And men, I was flogged in such instances. But typical to me, I no dey hear word All throughout my secondary school days, none of my classmates came to visit me at home. Even when they wanted to come, I always gave a wrong address or told them my address was too complicated to get to. Even Nitel land phone number those days was never to be given without permission. Thank God for mobile phones that has spoilt the kids of these days.  But today, such memories have brought a level of distance between me and him. We have had cause to fight and fight more than anything else. Bang the phone on each other, not talk for weeks to each other. He regrets all those days back in Nigeria, but time to correct it all has long gone. Having lived in the Western world for a while now, he realized some of the mistakes he made while raising up his young boys. I find it hard sometimes to relate with people on a steady note. After a while I withdraw to myself. If you do not relate with me first, I keep my distance. When I look at how my uncles are raising their kids in the UK, I realized the mistakes my father made and he has realized it too. Even to make calls or recieve calls at times na problem for me. But seriously I am much better now compared to some years back. I only pray the mistakes of my father, I would never make! I would not keep my children in the house to an excess. |
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coolkaboom (m)
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my dad was d epitome of strict upbringing, in fact, d relationship isdamaged beyond repair.d opposite of everything i intend to be with my kids. my madam ll have to be d bad cop because i fully intend to be d coolest dad in d world, i go spoil them rotten with all d care and attention in d world.
thankgod 4 mumsy, she mo than compensated 4 popsie being such a meanie. it probably kept us from nursing suicidal thoughts all d time. those days were somethin else
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Gamine (f)
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Seriously i don't know anyone that was ''Locked up" All my friends were allowed out We just had curfews and limits. We were beaten when we went beyond our limits or played roughly and dangerously My dad never beat us The highest thing was to smack our palms with his finger My mum was the disciplinarian |
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4Him (m)
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Pataki . . . man u're my brother from a different mother. You just described my upbringing to the T!  I actually thot u were Igwe in disguise. My dad and i now relate a whole lot better now thanks to my mom's efforts. For long periods in the last 2 years we didnt talk to each other at all . . . them report me tire to my uncles and aunts i no hear anything. As i used to tell my mom, there are always consequences for every action . . . it doesnt matter whether you are a parent or not, you will reap what you sow. If you sow distance, over the top aggression, dislike . . . don't expect to reap good communication. I gave it a lot of thot over the last christmas and realised it wasnt 100% his fault. He was just doing what he thot was right, i have no right to dislike him, i forced myself to grow to love him eventually (it wasnt difficult, behind his domineering veneer is a truly kind hearted fellow who honestly wanted his boys to be greater than he ever was). Now we talk and crack jokes about the bad old days when Dad would prowl around the house calling himself a Lion and daring anyone to so much as move a toe. In the end we all learn to be better parents . . . once u've been a kid you can read your child's fears and understand what he would probably be thinking. I will love to be a dad that my kid can tell absolutely anything under heaven, i never got that chance myself and i know how important that was growing up. In a way though, locking up your kids once a while doesnt hurt. They need to learn too that dad may be soft but does have rules he expects to be obeyed. |
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almondjoy (f)
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You hated day student life? I loved it jarein the middle of the sem, i'l just walk outtah school and turn day for 1 month before going back to the dorm All girls school na wahthe things that trip themnever understood Thankfully, was rehabilitated every sem break I hated it! Boardin' was more fun. That all girl's school was the pits!  Only for 2 years--thank God! Then came UNIBEN! Party time! Lmao AJ, I'm surprised you dad didnt give you a dirty slap. Lmao. Gosh I'm so glad I wasnt a boarder, Ughhhh, then to talk of all girls school? Would have jumped into a well. :- He was too shocked! He knew I had gone over the deep end and it was not a slapping matter. He was really embarassed! We never discussed that matter again till date. My mom still brings it up occasionally. She says now--you have seen how well "it moves"! She quietly says "any more more questions"! And we all burst out laughing--including ma siblings. My dad always keeps a straight face and pretends he is not even aware of what we are discussing. Only God knows what is going throught his mind! Chai!! Those people are fun! |
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almondjoy (f)
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I was brought up with the most strict form of discipline I can not even explain it all. We were practically locked inside the house all the time. I was always the one waiting and praying for when my parents would leave the house then we can sneak out to play. Even at that, we had to time when they would be back. Whenever they go out like that, we would give them an interval of 15minutes before we rush out into the neighborhood to play ball, or beg for bicycle to ride, or see which babe eye fit look on. Whenever I see my fathers car from afar, you need to see the race I do display in order for him not see me. There have been numerous times he caught me outside due to the very sharp eye he has while in his car. And men, I was flogged in such instances. But typical to me, I no dey hear word ;D All throughout my secondary school days, none of my classmates came to visit me at home. Even when they wanted to come, I always gave a wrong address or told them my address was too complicated to get to. Even Nitel land phone number those days was never to be given without permission. Thank God for mobile phones that has spoilt the kids of these days. But today, such memories have brought a level of distance between me and him. We have had cause to fight and fight more than anything else. Bang the phone on each other, not talk for weeks to each other. He regrets all those days back in Nigeria, but time to correct it all has long gone. Having lived in the Western world for a while now, he realized some of the mistakes he made while raising up his young boys. I find it hard sometimes to relate with people on a steady note. After a while I withdraw to myself. If you do not relate with me first, I keep my distance. When I look at how my uncles are raising their kids in the UK, I realized the mistakes my father made and he has realized it too. Even to make calls or recieve calls at times na problem for me. But seriously I am much better now compared to some years back.I only pray the mistakes of my father, I would never make! I would not keep my children in the house to an excess. Pataki . . . man u're my brother from a different mother. You just described my upbringing to the T! I actually thot u were Igwe in disguise. My dad and i now relate a whole lot better now thanks to my mom's efforts. For long periods in the last 2 years we didnt talk to each other at all . . . them report me tire to my uncles and aunts i no hear anything. As i used to tell my mom, there are always consequences for every action . . . it doesnt matter whether you are a parent or not, you will reap what you sow. If you sow distance, over the top aggression, dislike . . . don't expect to reap good communication. I gave it a lot of thot over the last christmas and realised it wasnt 100% his fault. He was just doing what he thot was right, i have no right to dislike him, i forced myself to grow to love him eventually (it wasnt difficult, behind his domineering veneer is a truly kind hearted fellow who honestly wanted his boys to be greater than he ever was). Now we talk and crack jokes about the bad old days when Dad would prowl around the house calling himself a Lion and daring anyone to so much as move a toe. In the end we all learn to be better parents . . . once u've been a kid you can read your child's fears and understand what he would probably be thinking. I will love to be a dad that my kid can tell absolutely anything under heaven, i never got that chance myself and i know how important that was growing up. In a way though, locking up your kids once a while doesnt hurt. They need to learn too that dad may be soft but does have rules he expects to be obeyed. Poor guys! Naija parents sef! Well, guys not to worry--that is one of the reasons we have Nairaland--to share. Our parents only did what they felt was the best at the time. They learnt that from their own parents too. That is why I put a limit to that "African values" mess. I don't flog children and I do not yell at them. I have learned better ways to communicate since I left Nigeria. Over there, all you have is a lot of yellin' and slapping around. It is left to us to break that cycle of "poor communication". Use Nairaland as your "sounding board". I do! You learn a lot here even if we fight and cuss each other out. I think we still love eachother. We will get it right someday. We just have to keep working at it. It is not going to be easy. But you must try! Best wishes!  |
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4Him (m)
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AJ, you sounded a lot like one of my aunts. Ngwah now i luff you very plenty! Yeah, my grandfather i hear was even worse. I normally tease my aunt for being so like my dad anytime she screams at her daughters. I have learnt so much from being around other people and on these boards . . . the most important thing is not to repeat the same mistakes with my own family. Wish me God's grace. |
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almondjoy (f)
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AJ, you sounded a lot like one of my aunts. Ngwah now i luff you very plenty! Yeah, my grandfather i hear was even worse. I normally tease my aunt for being so like my dad anytime she screams at her daughters. I have learnt so much from being around other people and on these boards . . . the most important thing is not to repeat the same mistakes with my own family. Wish me God's grace. You will do fine tiger! Just practice it. It usually starts with sayin' "I am sorry" when you feel you have hurt someone. My father acted like he forbade that. Never says I am sorry. We have a long way to go in that country, Nigeria. We do a lot of preaching but cannot express love to our own children the way they can feel it without paying a price. Use Nairaland--that is why I spend so much time here. If I am pissed, I dump it here! Anything I want to do--I do it here and spare everyone else around me the madness. That screaming is the one we have to stop. When you have kids you will change. Just find time to express yourself to someone--laff a lot too. You will do fine I say. Hugs! |
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D-reloaded (f)
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Wish me God's grace.
Ami  AJ, gist me jare. Since you don't believe in "coporal punishment" for your kids, how do you "tackle" them esp living here? I personally DONT want to raise mine here. anyway im listening |
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pahtahkee
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Pataki . . . man u're my brother from a different mother. You just described my upbringing to the T! I actually thot u were Igwe in disguise. My dad and i now relate a whole lot better now thanks to my mom's efforts. For long periods in the last 2 years we didnt talk to each other at all . . . them report me tire to my uncles and aunts i no hear anything. As i used to tell my mom, there are always consequences for every action . . . it doesnt matter whether you are a parent or not, you will reap what you sow. If you sow distance, over the top aggression, dislike . . . don't expect to reap good communication. I gave it a lot of thot over the last christmas and realised it wasnt 100% his fault. He was just doing what he thot was right, i have no right to dislike him, i forced myself to grow to love him eventually (it wasnt difficult, behind his domineering veneer is a truly kind hearted fellow who honestly wanted his boys to be greater than he ever was). Now we talk and crack jokes about the bad old days when Dad would prowl around the house calling himself a Lion and daring anyone to so much as move a toe. In the end we all learn to be better parents . . . once u've been a kid you can read your child's fears and understand what he would probably be thinking. I will love to be a dad that my kid can tell absolutely anything under heaven, i never got that chance myself and i know how important that was growing up. In a way though, locking up your kids once a while doesnt hurt. They need to learn too that dad may be soft but does have rules he expects to be obeyed. 4Him, after writing that sermon up there, I realized that I can write a book of my life experiences. My late grandfather was even worse according to my father. They hardly ever saw each other eye to eye. My father never really his own dad because he was abroad and doing some project works there. When he returned to Nigeria, he was so distant from my father and well it brought about the distant relationship they had. My father trained us exactly the same way his own father trained him. They were only allowed to come downstairs just once in a week! Only on Sunday evenings. I remember one day I was in the sitting room and I was looking at the kids playing outside from the window, then all of a sudden my father appeared from his bedroom, I tried pretending as if I was doing something else, obviously he had seen me by the window, guess what he told me to do, he told me to continue watching outside as my punishment. I started crying by the window side knowing it was punishment not that he liked my staying at the window and watching the neighbors play around. Well, my mother tried to bring peace between us. But because they were in UK and I was in Nigeria, constant communication I tried to severe it with him. Well now, we are better but when I see how my little cousins behave over here, I can't help but cry for my childhood days. Somethings I loved about it, some I totally despise with hatred. Well punishment is inevitable while raising your kids, but it must not be taken to the excess and it must be done in love. Poor guys! Naija parents sef! Well, guys not to worry--that is one of the reasons we have Nairaland--to share. Our parents only did what they felt was the best at the time. They learnt that from their own parents too. That is why I put a limit to that "African values" mess. I don't flog children and I do not yell at them. I have learned better ways to communicate since I left Nigeria. Over there, all you have is a lot of yellin' and slapping around. It is left to us to break that cycle of "poor communication". Use Nairaland as your "sounding board". I do! You learn a lot here even if we fight and cuss each other out. I think we still love eachother. We will get it right someday. We just have to keep working at it. It is not going to be easy. But you must try! Best wishes! Sounding board. I love that word! Reminds me of Network Management in resolving bottlenecks. Yes oh we still love each other. No matter how much I abuse on this forum, I do not take it beyond what it is written here. It is all part of fun. So I do not take all your wordings against me more than a cyber lunatic needing my e-medications. As for setting it right, I think we all are working towards that! Thanks. |
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D-reloaded (f)
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I remember one day I was in the sitting room and I was looking at the kids playing outside from the window, then all of a sudden my father appeared from his bedroom, I tried pretending as if I was doing something else, obviously he had seen me by the window, guess what he told me to do, he told me to continue watching outside as my punishment. I started crying by the window side knowing it was punishment not that he liked my staying at the window and watching the neighbors play around. Kai, lol now THAT's mean |
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4Him (m)
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Ami thanks! 4Him, after writing that sermon up there, I realized that I can write a book of my life experiences. My late grandfather was even worse according to my father. They hardly ever saw each other eye to eye. My father never really his own dad because he was abroad and doing some project works there. When he returned to Nigeria, he was so distant from my father and well it brought about the distant relationship they had. My father trained us exactly the same way his own father trained him.
lol we must have borrowed grandfathers somewhere along the line. My grandpa rarely talked but he expected you to be seen and not heard. Once he beat my dad up for coming 3rd in class and feeling good about it! Of course my father duly did the same thing to his kids . . . everyone was always top of the class from primary school to college. It was a requirement if u wanted to have a relatively quiet holiday and avoid the pankere waiting for u at home after submitting your report card. They were only allowed to come downstairs just once in a week! Only on Sunday evenings. I remember one day I was in the sitting room and I was looking at the kids playing outside from the window, then all of a sudden my father appeared from his bedroom, I tried pretending as if I was doing something else, obviously he had seen me by the window, guess what he told me to do, he told me to continue watching outside as my punishment. I started crying by the window side knowing it was punishment not that he liked my staying at the window and watching the neighbors play around. na punishment be that? Try having someone flog u with nepa cables and report back to me. Well, my mother tried to bring peace between us. But because they were in UK and I was in Nigeria, constant communication I tried to severe it with him. Well now, we are better but when I see how my little cousins behave over here, I can't help but cry for my childhood days. Somethings I loved about it, some I totally despise with hatred.
there are times you want to look your mom in the face and call her a collosal failure but at times u realise she herself could not have helped the situation any better than she did. Newayz all of us don grow now . . . we don't remember the bad times anymore. Well punishment is inevitable while raising your kids, but it must not be taken to the excess and it must be done in love.
how many times did i hear that statement . . . and how many times did i say that if this was Christ's example of "love" then He can shove it up His cross. God forgive me . . . there is a thin line between correcting a child in love and correcting him in anger. Most parents can't differentiate between the two. |
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stillwater (f)
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I remember one day I was in the sitting room and I was looking at the kids playing outside from the window, then all of a sudden my father appeared from his bedroom, I tried pretending as if I was doing something else, obviously he had seen me by the window, guess what he told me to do, he told me to continue watching outside as my punishment. I started crying by the window side knowing it was punishment not that he liked my staying at the window and watching the neighbors play around uuuuuh We used to look outside too my mother would be like what don't you have here that you are looking outside? |
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almondjoy (f)
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Ami AJ, gist me jare. Since you don't believe in "coporal punishment" for your kids, how do you "tackle" them esp living here? I personally DONT want to raise mine here. anyway im listening First, it takes 2. Both parents always speak with one voice instead of letting them play us. *Next--While I am not the church and Sunday school believe it or not--They socialize there more than worship. Too bad! Not working at the moment--too many distractions! Friends and the like. *We talk a lot. We have conferences once a week or so to touch basis with what is going on. I let them express themselves while I just listen to what ever they want to talk about. Lot of role playing to teach them what to do when in certain circusmstances. *I allow them to make choices--they don't have to eat what they don't want and they do not have to do what they don't want to do. If it is what I feel they need--I just tell them that is the way it has to be but next time they get to choose. I respect them. Correct them with love and praise. *No yelling. *No spanking. *Keep them busy *Set goals periodically for them to accomplish. *Get them involved in house chores. *Reward and punishment. If they really misbehave--no allowances for however time I wish. I let them know I am disappointed and hurt. Punishment comes in different forms No friends visiting--they can't visit their friends either. No games. No TV,or No birthday celebrations. And I mean it. I take away what they love the most. More chores to do for the offenders, while others are off playing. I let them know that if they misbehave the government will come and take them away and they will never see their parents again. Take them to shelters to volunteer there to see where homeless children go. |
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D-reloaded (f)
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author=almondjoy link=topic=113781.msg1979163#msg1979163 date=1203549631
I let them know that if they misbehave the government will come and take them away and they will never see their parents again. Take them to shelters to volunteer there to see where homeless children go.
Rofl I like that one, I do agree with you with the reward & punishment somewhat because most parenmts say it but the reason why it FAILS is because most parents also don't KEEP to it. They tend to break it after a day or so and that's why the kids don't take such threats seriously. I remember when I was in JS 1, anyway we were all in the new Mercedes my uncle helped my parents to buy and I was fighting with my sister and I threw a brush at her and the brush cracked the windshield. When my parents called and my uncle told my parents, my dad just said "Dont expect anything for Christmas", I was sad for a while but I then got over it and told myself they'd never do something like that, I depended on my mom to calm the hot headed man down. Should have seen my face when Christmas stuff was sent and nothing was for me. No new shoes/sneakers for the next semester (I went to ISI, this was VERY important), all the christmas candy and gifts were packaged in boxes addressed to my sister andf brother. Nothing for me. My sister, ever the spiteful tart didnt share anything, only my brother pitied me and shared some candy and cookies with me. Kai, I was miserable. Imagine scrabbing old shoes to death with a toothbrush and Ajek just to make them look somewhat new. Never again! Water sef I didnt drink in that car again talkless of carrying a "weapon" I didnt get what you meant by the sunday school comment, care to elaborate?  |
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The Sly
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I like that one, I do agree with you with the reward & punishment somewhat because most parenmts say it but the reason why it FAILS is because most parents also don't KEEP to it. They tend to break it after a day or so and that's why the kids don't take such threats seriously. I remember when I was in JS 1, anyway we were all in the new Mercedes my uncle helped my parents to buy and I was fighting with my sister and I threw a brush at her and the brush cracked the windshield. When my parents called and my uncle told my parents, my dad just said "Dont expect anything for Christmas", I was sad for a while but I then got over it and told myself they'd never do something like that, I depended on my mom to calm the hot headed man down. Should have seen my face when Christmas stuff was sent and nothing was for me. No new shoes/sneakers for the next semester (I went to ISI, this was VERY important), all the christmas candy and gifts were packaged in boxes addressed to my sister andf brother. Nothing for me. My sister, ever the spiteful tart didnt share anything, only my brother pitied me and shared some candy and cookies with me. Kai, I was miserable. Imagine scrabbing old shoes to death with a toothbrush and Ajek just to make them look somewhat new. Never again! Water sef I didnt drink in that car again talkless of carrying a "weapon" here is my quote of the day. . . . . . . . .im going to keep this incase somethin similar happens in the future. . . . . my kids don enter yawa!. . |
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almondjoy (f)
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Rofl I like that one, I do agree with you with the reward & punishment somewhat because most parenmts say it but the reason why it FAILS is because most parents also don't KEEP to it. They tend to break it after a day or so and that's why the kids don't take such threats seriously. I remember when I was in JS 1, anyway we were all in the new Mercedes my uncle helped my parents to buy and I was fighting with my sister and I threw a brush at her and the brush cracked the windshield. When my parents called and my uncle told my parents, my dad just said "Dont expect anything for Christmas", I was sad for a while but I then got over it and told myself they'd never do something like that, I depended on my mom to calm the hot headed man down. Should have seen my face when Christmas stuff was sent and nothing was for me. No new shoes/sneakers for the next semester (I went to ISI, this was VERY important), all the christmas candy and gifts were packaged in boxes addressed to my sister andf brother. Nothing for me. My sister, ever the spiteful tart didnt share anything, only my brother pitied me and shared some candy and cookies with me. Kai, I was miserable. Imagine scrabbing old shoes to death with a toothbrush and Ajek just to make them look somewhat new. Never again! Water sef I didnt drink in that car again talkless of carrying a "weapon" I didnt get what you meant by the sunday school comment, care to elaborate? he he he he he. Now you know that there are some purnishments worse than spanking or locking up kids. Rewards and purnishment is the best way. . . . . . . And yes! For those kids who threaten their parents with calling 911 and all that crap, I threaten them too. I tell them that if the misbehave, I will also call 911 for them and they would be taken to the "dog pound" like Micheal Vicks dogs. That is why I take them to homeless shelters, so they can smell the place and see what it looks like and what their potential forster parents would look like. Sunday school? That is where you have school on Sundays but you study and discuss children's bible stories. Have you not heard of "Sunday school teachers"? They just sit around and read nice stories from the bible and hear things about Jesus turning water into wine, moses parting the red sea and stuff. They also watch movies depending on what is going on at any given time of the year. It is just a bonding class to get them out of the house on Sundays. |
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D-reloaded (f)
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Lol you this woman sef. I know sunday schools, I just didnt get your comment about them
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almondjoy (f)
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Lol you this woman sef. I know sunday schools, I just didnt get your comment about them
Which part did you not get? The fact that I actually know that they existed or ? |
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aloib (f)
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hmmmm, my parents were just neutral, Dad had his own kind of strictness sha, we were allowed to go out, as long as you had finished the house chores et all, my dad had this policy, do bad things in front of me rather than at my back, i had my first shot of liquor wid my dad, he knew we smoked and just told us to do it in liberation( we used to have this get togethers with people from my mums side every weekend) where there would be massive drinking, smoking et al, so he always saw us doing that. I WASNT ALLOWED TO RELAX MY HAIR AND USE MAKEUP TILL I was done with highschool. socially he wasnt strict with us. When you go out, make sure you come home before 10 pm, unless you wuld be locked out. If he told you to do anything, make sure you do them before you think of going out. Keep the house clean etc etc, he never wants to see you idle, at least do something or read the ditionary. we had to go to bed brfore 9pm and wake up at 5 to prepare for school, he musnt wake up before anyone in the house. He often yelled at us, he usually canned us.and after cainning he would ask" do you know why i beat you" etc, we were close to our parents sha, gist with them etc etc, even when friends were around, we were allowed to stay in the living room and join the convo un;less you arent rude, H e was strict sha, because many people used to be scared of him, because he would always tell you the turth. this min yu see him scolding his workers and the next min he is eating with them. My mum on the other hand was just normal, lol she usually screamed at us( i thnk it runs in THEIR blood), pinch us, box us, lmao, it was always fun because most times my siblings and i would be laughing ( heck!! including my dad aso) when shes trying to pinch someone or scream, I wouldnt complain about my growing up sha, till now whenever i go out i make sure i'm home before 10, my body alrm is set to 5, don't do stuffs i know my olks wouldnt like. I don't keep secrets from them. as per boyfriend and girlfriend issue, they are open minded about it( they brought us up with " if you know you aint ready for the consequences of an action, don't do it) so we know better, anyhow sha, i had a nice childhood and can't complain, they were simply the best!! |
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almondjoy (f)
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hmmmm, my parents were just neutral, Dad had his own kind of strictness sha, we were allowed to go out, as long as you had finished the house chores et all, my dad had this policy, do bad things in front of me rather than at my back, i had my first shot of liquor wid my dad, he knew we smoked and just told us to do it in liberation( we used to have this get togethers with people from my mums side every weekend) where there would be massive drinking, smoking et al, so he always saw us doing that. I WASNT ALLOWED TO RELAX MY HAIR AND USE MAKEUP TILL I was done with highschool. socially he wasnt strict with us. When you go out, make sure you come home before 10 pm, unless you wuld be locked out. If he told you to do anything, make sure you do them before you think of going out. Keep the house clean etc etc, he never wants to see you idle, at least do something or read the ditionary. we had to go to bed brfore 9pm and wake up at 5 to prepare for school, he musnt wake up before anyone in the house. He often yelled at us, he usually canned us.and after cainning he would ask" do you know why i beat you" etc, we were close to our parents sha, gist with them etc etc, even when friends were around, we were allowed to stay in the living room and join the convo un;less you arent rude, H e was strict sha, because many people used to be scared of him, because he would always tell you the turth. this min yu see him scolding his workers and the next min he is eating with them. My mum on the other hand was just normal, lol she usually screamed at us( i thnk it runs in THEIR blood), pinch us, box us, lmao, it was always fun because most times my siblings and i would be laughing ( heck!! including my dad aso) when shes trying to pinch someone or scream, I wouldnt complain about my growing up sha, till now whenever i go out i make sure i'm home before 10, my body alrm is set to 5, don't do stuffs i know my olks wouldnt like. I don't keep secrets from them. as per boyfriend and girlfriend issue, they are open minded about it( they brought us up with " if you know you aint ready for the consequences of an action, don't do it) so we know better, anyhow sha, i had a nice childhood and can't complain, they were simply the best!! No wonder you are always so peaceful. I always knew you were under the influenceSSSS |
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D-reloaded (f)
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You were allowed to smoke but not allowed to use makeup or relaxer.
I thought my parents were weird.
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efuah (f)
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pataki and 4Him  Av always thought guys are always free when it comes to this. We were three girsl one boy and the boy was somehow free than my big sisters and myself. Sowry ooo . . . no wonder!  |
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almondjoy (f)
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pataki and 4Him Av always thought guys are always free when it comes to this.We were three girsl one boy and the boy was somehow free than my big sisters and myself. Sowry ooo . . . no wonder! For some sick reason, men are harsh on boys. I can't understand it. You will think there would be some kind of "bonding" like the most primate beings have between fathers and sons.  But in Nigeria, you know things go upside down and inside out! Go figure!---- 
You were allowed to smoke but not allowed to use makeup or relaxer.
I thought my parents were weird.
It takes all kinds a swear! Not to worry aloib babeeeeeeee! You are still a doll anyday! Ain't that some shit? |
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jkpretty (f)
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My childhood was just in between strictness & caringly instructing. we were not locked up always growing up as a child but i simply cannot understand the reason why once we hear the horn of my father's car, everybody hurries from wherever to find their way home, even our dog of then hurries back in side. Every one forms activity by quickly finding a book to read. We hurry to the dining table with our books (how can i forget times table) The first question that comes out of my father's mouth is "have u finished learning your times table" "which one are u now, let me hear your 8 times table" and i could almost die if i can't recite it well. I had this Ghanian home teacher Mrs. mensah who took away most of my activities after school, it was always lesson after lesson. Abi na me won become Nigerian president. So every free time i had was used in utmost joy & gladness. Same with my siblings. "You have to pass your common entrance" was what they rang in my head, but thank God i gave them what they wanted. Going to Secondary school was like "waiting to exhale" . I saw it as a get-away. I got admission into a Boarding school, a single sex school for that matter. Little did i know what was coming. My parents thot going to a single sex school was going to keep me off boys. Yes it did, it actually kept me off boys the whole six years i used in high school & so pathetic that when i graduated i found it hard to hold conversation with a guy. This wasn't funny at all. Not like i didn't know what to say but i couldn't just understand So it looked like i was kind of snobbish to guys, but thank God i had an elder brother with friends, that soon made me get over it. But truly i can say it helped me stay off boys till i was emotionally ready to date Now guy friends are somewot the best. Basically i think the primary school molding by my parents was good enough, it yielded good results but secondary school's was bad i almost swore never to send my child to a single sex school. Oops! my Dad's mode of punishment was pulling my ears & twisting hard, i tell u its lots worse than pankere, i dreaded that shit as a child. |
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stillwater (f)
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My childhood was just in between strictness & caringly instructing. we were not locked up always growing up as a child but i simply cannot understand the reason why once we hear the horn of my father's car, everybody hurries from wherever to find their way home, even our dog of then hurries back in side. Every one forms activity by quickly finding a book to read. We hurry to the dining table with our books (how can i forget times table) The first question that comes out of my father's mouth is "have u finished learning your times table" "which one are u now, let me hear your 8 times table" and i could almost die if i can't recite it well. That was funny ;DWe used to play with sand in our backyard that was fenced all round. Sand was our rice, some water leaves growing was our soup with water, stones were our meat. There was a ladder we placed on some tall wall, so that we could sight our father's car from afar before he sneaks up on us. If we happen to see him, everyone would throw away what we've been doing, rush into the bathroom, put on our night gowns and behave like saints. |
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D-reloaded (f)
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Going to Secondary school was like "waiting to exhale" . I saw it as a get-away. I got admission into a Boarding school, a single sex school for that matter. Little did i know what was coming. My parents thot going to a single sex school was going to keep me off boys. Yes it did, it actually kept me off boys the whole six years i used in high school & so pathetic that when i graduated i found it hard to hold conversation with a guy. This wasn't funny at all. Not like i didn't know what to say but i couldn't just understand So it looked like i was kind of snobbish to guys, but thank God i had an elder brother with friends, that soon made me get over it. But truly i can say it helped me stay off boys till i was emotionally ready to date Now guy friends are somewot the best. You are definitely one of the few that the whole "same sex school keep you from boys" crap worked on because seriously it's usually the exact OPPOSITE. Those are the ones are so bloody boy crazy. I remember the ones around ISI, the way they would throw themselves on ISI boys was so pathetic. The guys that we wouldnt give a time of day those desperate tarts would become their sex slaves. pitiful. I wouldnt send my kids to a boarding school nor a same sex one. |
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iice (f)
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aloibnna your family sounds like V's family lol. . .
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