Should I Allow This Wedding To Hold?

 
About two years ago I was passing along Oshodi road and I saw a nice looking gentleman, well dressed and obviously educated asking a passe-by to give him N20. The latter ignored him and thinking that the guy was stranded and moved by pity, without being asked I handed over a N20 note to this young man and I continued my journey. About an hour later  on my return journey, at the same spot this guy was still there asking for N20. I stopped and told him how disappointed I was in him, that I thought he was stranded, not knowing he was a professional beggar. He made a face at me and  turned his back. I walked away. 

About a month later I saw this guy around the same place and I positioned myself so he would ask me for N20. He did and I asked him if he had N100 change, after some seconds of hesitation he answered in the affirmative and I asked him why he was begging for N20 if he had N100.  I told him to go and work and he ignored me. In short, every time I had passed through Oshodi since 2006 I’d always seen this guy doing his thing. I later decided to mind my own business by ignoring him. Interestingly, the guy looks  more robust and fresher than I first knew him over a year ago.  Sometime in January I noticed he had changed his base to Awolowo Way in Ikeja. (perhaps some other busy  bodies like me did not let him be) and twice I have seen him at his ‘new office address’

Recently I got a invitation from a bosom friend to join her family at the Introduction  Ceremony of her kid sister which was slated for last Saturday. I was there and when the groom to be emerged, he happened to be my ‘beggar friend’!  ???Thinkin I wasn't seeing well, I wiped my face and looked again, he was, of course, the one.  I was shocked  to the marrow but I controlled myself. The duo  made a perfect couple! The ‘iyawo’ was full of excitement and they were obviously in love. I later stylishly and carefully interrogated my friend about who her in-law to be was and I was told the guy is an   Engineer  with the Lagos State Government(?). In short, the wedding date has been fixed for May this year

Now, if you were in my shoes. would  you spill the beans? If yes, to whom? The parents, sister or the lady concerned? God knows I wouldn’t want to spoil the joy of this young lady but at the same time I can’t  allow this deceit to go on. People, what should I do?

Na wa o wonder shall never end, maybe when next u see him doing same bussiness do try and take the wife, parent or even your there to see with their own eyes.

i concur.stage an ambush for the guy.because if u tell without proof,they going to think you just want to spoil their show.

hi,i don't think telling anyone is the right way to go about it,the guy was only begging and not an armed robber or yahoo yahoo guy or 419,dyu realise the kind of pressures on the guy to pay for a wedding,provide for a wife and he might also have some problems you don't know about which is connected to finances,ill advice you to speak to the guy in private,get him to tell you why he s doing the whole begging and to promise you within a time frame to stop the whole begging thing or else you ll report to the wife rather than telling the wife and family now cause the end result will be a lot of unhappy people, don't let us forget nigeria and the stress is not easy and soo many people we r looking at as respectable have done worse stuffs than the guy s doing

its much better to keep your mouth shot because the wife will never say thank you for ruining her joy but on the other hand u can arrange some click for the wife to see herself because i can see that u can't stand it

Tell your friend!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

None of my business really.  Let them work it out.  You saw the 'beggar" side of the man.  The "fiance" saw the "husband" side of the man.  She will soon reconcile both notions without your help.

Things have a way of working themselves out--for better for worse.  Not ma place to.  It was her responsibility and that of her family to find out what the guy does for a living.  Since she did not, then let her deal with it when she finds out.  For all you know the "beggar" spouse has used all his savings to open a "business".

I wish them happy married life jare.  At least she is not marrying an armed robber.

Frankly, that is their wahala!

i'll advice u not to attend the wedding ceremony, u know why? the pastor he's going to ask "who by the way have a reason why this couple should not get married" and if no such person like u(titi) the secret will die in u, so if u refuse to voice it out may to the pastor secretly this  is your destination (below attachment)

Lmao. He's probably cursed.

No be Nigeria? Rofl. 

what would be the point of the show ofe wedding just to divorce later dfor a problem she could have known beforehand.

Anyway I agree with the ambush thing. Seriously maybe the dude is cursed.

Noooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hello,
Its quite a shocking one i must let you know, the way you react
should be based on the relationship you have with the family
in questions and also the background of the family,if they are the
kind of family that would listen to the truth if they hear one.Are they
Muslims or Christian because am aware that churches and mosques nowadays
have wedding programs which gives room for them to interview the
couple to be and also find out things about them before going ahead
with the wedding program.
i think what you need to do is speak freely with the bride-to-be
not telling her what you know, but to ask about few things she knows
about her hobby-to-be, things like where they met,what he does,
how he spend his days, how many times has she visited him in his office,
how many of her friends does she know and how many occassions have
they attended together and things like that.If her response to this is
not that passuasive you'll need to talk to your friend, asking her the
same thing. When you do this they might get to talk to each other
(i mean the sisters)then their attention will be drawn to the matter,
which will make them tread with caution, because if the wedding
eventually hold without you telling them what you know
and things went rough, then your imformation would not be valuable,
and to be honest with you, the family will not appreciate such kind of gesture
what you'll head is that you have a live-saving information within your reach
and you concealed it within yourself, they'll start calling you all sort of names
that your parents never gave you at birth.
But one fact still remain that  whatever you do, you'll have to be very diplomatic
about it so as not to run into trouble while trying to help.
And finally if you don't know how to go about it, see the bride to be as your younger
sister and let you instint guide you through.
Once again, above all be very diplomatic about the way you go about it, or also
seek elders' advice

A Husband who begs?

That is the lowest form next to politicans and armed robbers 

Make I chop sand first then beg.

Maybe its his twin brother that begs? Seriously, take beejazzy's advice.

Please let the iyawo or her sister know somehow.  Don't keep your mouth shut.  I would definately want to know if I were in her shoes.  Yes, it would hurt and be a very painful thing to go through but I would rather be safe than sorry.  Nevertheless, in the future, I can bet you that if something goes wrong between the two (I reject that for them), he would open his mouth and say you knew something about it, which would make matters much worse.  All in all, let widsom from above be your guide.  By the way, when he saw you at the introduction, what was his reaction? 

Unfortunately you just have to keep mute. If you are compelled to share the mystery then I'd suggest you go ahead and talk with an elderly person who you seem to be unbiased towards the couple. Its hard!!