How To Stop Sex And Enjoy Your Relationship Till Marriage

@almondjoy, for a woman, I must say your choice of words are indeed COLORFUL.

Thank you. The last time I checked, the world I live in contains men and women.  Language is no barrier to communication, as long as the message is received and registers correctly in the right faculties of the brain or lack thereof!

I love Nairaland… but when I realise I’ll have to interact with people like ‘Almondjoy’, it makes me sick!!!

Hey girl, trying to prove that what u know is wrong is right, is definitely the worst kind of cowardice ave ever seen. It’s a pity your heart is so full of ‘hate’… I can imagine how many times u must have gotten your cold heart broken!!

Anyway, no need to give yourself a heart attack over me or my tiff with my BF, just remember to send me your e-mail addy so I can send u my wedding invitation.

Oh, and could you please continue ‘phocking’ around, and as a medical personnel, I could give you a vagina tightner when you need one (I know you probably needed one 2 years back). Infact, am not actually asking you to stop making a fool of yourself and selling yourself cheap to men, am just telling you not to make a fool of yourself and publicize it for everybody to see. Either way, you end up making a fool of yourself, but spare us Nairaland lovers your shit okay!!

Hmmmmmmmmmm! Thank you madam!   Cheap men?  Ooooooooooooh, please you have been grossly misinformed.  Go and check.  I am a Nairalander with a difference ok?  Not in your league of "single, searching and free to mingle" ngwo gwo soup of bend down pick marriages!  Let me educate you!

I am glad to be phocking around in ma matrimonial home while you use your withered carrots of breasts to entice reluctant victims.  If one man has continously phocked you for over 10 years with four kids, you can understand why a have a vaginal "prolapse".   Fortuately I feed Mr Almondo properly and his "browser" remains well fed too, making it difficult to fool around on him.  Every other I attempt to do that with will only cause me grave disappointment.   So why bother?  You should see his weapon too. . . . .you will be so jealous.   What is your own excuse for your widenend circumference both ways---front and back? You are going into your marriage with "fasting and praying".  Your battles ahead are many ma child!  Change your ways lady, old trick! Before you are jilted on your wedding day. Just make it to the alter first ok? MUGU!

Good, send the wedding invitation.  Make sure you are not wife #25. Don't let all that "phocking and fingering" go to waste.  I will only be happy for you! So you can stop this your "boju boju" repentance, and put yourself out of your miserable existence.

You sanctimonious wretch of a wench!  For your information, you have like less than 150 posts in your Nairaland existence, if this is your first time around and  I have almost over 4000 minus my past 10 lives on Nairaland.  Don't sweat it child, making a fool of myself on Nairaland is what I do best with morons like you!

"The Preacher's Wife"!

@ almondjoy
i really have to wonder bout your strong choice of words and violent reaction to everything and everyone? Who are you trynna convince bout your "happy" marriage and family, satisfactory sex life, fully loaded husband and sexual prowess? nairalanders or yourself? Puhleese!
You act like you have a lot to be ashamed of but being the Nigerian that you are your pride refuses to allow you be put down,scolded or corrected. Is this the kind of principles you give to your Kids? then Thank God i'm not a part of your family. How old are you? And why do you choose to abuse everyone? Do you know you can actually get a point across without being abusive? it's called tact.
As for all your boasting, we all know that things are not always what they seem especially in a marriage, if i ask your husband the same things privately will your answers concur as regards your marriage, family and sexuality? Please, spare us all your anger and pain, i sincerely hope for your family's sake that all this is just a ruse or facade on nairaland, an alter-ego whom you hope will win the award of the most controversial character on nairaland.
if you are truly tired of hypocritical bull crap then walk on by, cover your nose, close your eyes or\and bow your head. you really don't have to be a part of the hypocrisy or are you trynna start an anti-religion campaign? word of warning you can't win. Religion is the Opium of the people and you and all your dark emotion are not enough to change that. Simple!
Capisce?

Lmao. asiri Ujuoan ti tu

hahaha. No wonder she's so mad. 

Abeg AJ, continue please. These people in denial, it's hilarious and please don't even bother with that rabid dog PLC. You should see the nasty thing he did with dear Lady T's pic and the garbage he yarned in that Igbo thread. Mr Born againl. Moronic asswipe. na only temporary ban he's crying about, I will protest til he's completely removed from Nairaland.

"born again" bastard 

@ the poster good topic.
It is indeed possible to stop fornicating before marriage.
People have done it and their "things" did not decay while they waited.

There's absolutely no need to insult anyone who hold sChristian or moral values with regards to fornication
Just because some people are jumping from bed to bed happily doesn't mean we all have to
The topic is only advocating how to stop fornication.
Those who are happily fornicating need not attack those who are not

sex is the sweetest thing but just for the moment it lasts. sex is most dangerous thing for every moment of one's life. there is indeed a solution- His mercies, His word and His spirit {Jesus}. All d best as u journey through life without pre-marital sex

Poster, thanks for the insight. I'm sure it will help those who need help in that aspect.

Joy, I see your madness is yet to be diagnosed. What the heck is your problem? Just look at your attitude here again. OP, made an honest and true post and you turned it into a pool of shamelessness.

What the heck are you on about? I'm not a saint when it comes to insults but woman, you need to get a grip. Do you have to dig up your family, and your ill life up on the net just to prove a point?  Abeg, your own too much and very unnecessary.

Just listen to yourself. I'll tell you again, your attitude is embarrassing. Screaming all over the thread and trying to make everyone reason like you is just so dumb.

You might not be born again but let those who are, strive towards perfection .

I wonder what really makes you happy in life other than lay about and fight everyday on Nairaland. I worry about your family. Shame!
Comot abeg.

hmm hmm

newe o!

If the bible didnt say we should expect this

i would have been doubly surprised

I say do your worst! See who wants to preach morals.  You miserable, ignorant juvenile, with cotton wool for brains.  Madam busy body, the defender of the helpless! May my matter never leave your blood!  Amen.  Just like a drug, like a very potent drug, I will continue to circulate in your blood!  You have not said anything new from your "gramaphonic" performance on Nairaland.  You remind me of a very sick parrot. . . . . . . same old shit from your arse!

Like I said, go and register with new names.  I am still here.  Heffer! If you are not a religous prostitute yourself, why are you bothered? I say go back to your duties of phocking and repenting! Sin no more!  Here you are on Nairaland without any meaningful thing to contribute.  But as long as you sport any "alive and kicking" phallus you become agile.   Do you want to "swallow" them all?   Keep roaming around Nairaland with your new name.  An ashewo remains and ashewo! Infact in your own case, you operate with the blood of the devil   I say do your worst! Mother Mary, patron saint of the helpless!  Ashewo in sheep's clothing!   We know what you are all about please spare us you halloween performance.  It ain't October yet.  Lay those Easter eggs between your legs and stop walking around bow-legged!


Obviously you are a country bumpkin and I really do not have time for those.  No need to address you at all! All I can say is please go and buy a good pair of glasses.

R-Dynamite ma left cheek . . . . . . .And who has time for that "deeek" repellant? Please she should go and look for her mates and stop trying to attach herself to me like an AIDS infected leech of a drag queen!  She may be your pal. . . .don't care about that.  I will meet him or her head long whereever she chooses!  Her choice not mine.  We shall see who dies first!

Why are you trying to interceed for her?  She is known for being one of the most unintelligent bitches on Nairaland circulating only where there is a "dog out". . . . .to sniff dogs arses!  Leave her, if she wants to stick her nose in her anus. . . . .she can only suffocate there from all the constipated stench coming from her front and back end.   Useless thing!  Like I am afraid of her or something?  Nonsense!

You need need to tell her to mind her own "phocking business" on this Nairaland and do what she does best  "follow follow no brainer of an olodo"!  With her one line moralistic bullshit.  Like anyone cares.   Defender of the helpless.  Patron Saint of all busy bodies.  Let her go and register with another name and come and face me. Amorphous ugly monkey!  R-Dynamite my hemorrhoids!  Ass-wipe newspaper!

She thinks it was the one she did the last time and I just let her be.  Since she says she is a mad bitch, I will tell her this time that when a mad dog or bitch bites me, I will definitely bite back so we can exchange rabid species.   Imagine that idiot tryin' to address me when she has not learned to wipe her butt first?    Let her come back. . . .I am so ready for her useless arse, if she really is female between the legs.

I don't look for trouble, I post ma shit and move on.  if you address me, I address you period!  Unless you absolutely do not qualify. I have mustered up enough bile to slug it out with her this time around.  She is free to bring it on.  For I am so ready for that madam goody-2-shoes fake arse of a busy body.  Where was she when her mates were getting married.  Now she wants to prove marriage quality on Nairaland brothel?   She don miss road be that. . . . . no hope I say. 

_{Otherwise Ban!}   I am ready. . . . the name Almondjoy don tire me sef!

Here comes another one.  Fortunately, you know what you can do with your bible.  Not really interested.  Keep following me around.

You shove your shit down my throat, I will definitely shove mine up your arse!  Which is more painfull?

bad tenses, poor grammar construction, appalling spelling . . . all combine to make this officially the worst post of the thread. Completely incomprehensible.

chill, the way to learn is not to insult those who point out your glaring errors. 
It shld be a shame that you still write like someone who never passed through a public primary school in Nigeria . . .

What do u mean by a rattling ass? That is not a valid expression as your ass doesnt have rattlers attached to it. Please rephrase your insult at least.