A Must Read! Soulful Relationships

This should bless those who are yet to get married and those who already are.
by Reverend Ronald McFadden

If you're not married yet, share this with a friend. If you are married,
share it with your spouse or other married couples . . . and reflect on it.
An African proverb states, "Before you get married, keep both eyes open, and
after you marry, close one eye."

Before you get involved and make a commitment to someone, don't let lust,
desperation, immaturity, ignorance, pressure from others or a low-self
esteem make you blind to warning signs. Keep your eyes open, and don't fool
yourself that you can change someone or that what you see  as faults aren't
really that important.

Once you decide to commit to someone, over time their flaws,
vulnerabilities, pet peeves, and differences will become more obvious.

If you love your mate and want the relationship to grow and evolve, you've
got to learn how to close one eye and not let every little thing bother you.

You and your mate have many different expectations, emotional needs, values,
dreams, weaknesses, and strengths. You are two unique individual children of
God who have decided to share a life together. Neither of you is perfect,
but are you perfect for each other?

Do you bring out the best in each other?
Do you compliment and compromise with each other, or do you compete,
compare, and control?
What do you bring to the relationship? Do you bring past relationships, past
hurt, past mistrust, past pain?

You can't take someone to the altar to alter him or her.  You can't make
someone love you or make someone stay. If you develop self-esteem, spiritual
discernment, and "a life," you won't find yourself making someone else
responsible for your happiness or responsible for your pain.

Manipulation, control, jealousy, neediness, and selfishness are not the
ingredients of a thriving, healthy, loving and lasting relationship.

Seeking status, sex, wealth and security are the wrong  reasons to be in a
relationship.

What keeps a relationship strong?   Communication, intimacy, trust, a  sense
of humor, sharing household tasks, some getaway time without business or
children and daily exchanges (a meal, shared activity, a  hug, a call, a
touch, a note). Leave a nice message on their voicemail or send a nice
email. Sharing common goals and interests. Growth is important. Grow
together, not away from each other, giving each other space to grow without
feeling insecure. Allow your mate to have outside interest.

You can't always be together. Give each other a sense of belonging and
assurances of commitment.  Don't try to control one another.  Learn each
other's family situation. Respect his or her parents regardless.

Don't put  pressure on each other for material goods. Remember, for Richer
or  for Poorer. If these qualities are missing, the relationship will erode
as resentment, withdrawal, abuse, neglect, dishonesty, and pain replace the
passion.

"Nurture your mind with great thoughts, for you  will never go any higher
than you think." The grass withers, the flower fades, but the word of God
stands forever. Isaiah 40:8

Shall we make a new rule of life from tonight: Always to try to be a little
kinder than is necessary.

"The  difference between 'United' and 'Untied' is where you put the "I".


Bless you all

cheers girl

me love 'em

nice 1

I will keep those in ma head

You are all welcome and i am happy that men are identifying with it too. It will be OK, David!

yeah hey how do you make a topic?

quite intresting! even though some people aint ready to pratice and they see it as policy statement u know. just like "I know i can, be what i want to be, if i try hard at it, i ll be where i want to be" and these same people, after 1st and 2nd attempt they give up.

Praticing what we preach is one thing and believing it is another thing!

baby4U2, say more. What's the story?

this is nice one, keep it up, i am copy and saving it into my mail box now.

Beautiful advice. Thank you.

Thank you, ladies!

@harvey
Happy married life in advance 



@curiousnja
these are beautiful and encouraging words

this is really a great one thanks for the post

What a wonderful write - up. May God bless u. I was really touched and saw reason's to so many things said

This is so real an highly appreciated.

Even if you wont practice it, one thing is for sure; when you become a nagative victim of a relationship, these lines will come back to you; believe me, you will wish you'd listened.

I like this

keep it up

     This has just touched a life[font=Lucida Sans Unicode][/font]