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jephiano
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wow,what a topic and what wonderful responses! ;)first things first,we shuld all be balanced while giving passing blame;d issue is way too complex and blaming d man or d woman hardly scratches d surface.
im goin to be a little preachy now;my upbringing demands it.what determines a person's view of sex and how many persons he/she may have it with is largely based on his/her acceptance of cultural/religious views.but what i do know for sure is that,just as Jesus said:"he that is faithful in least would be faithful in much".Translation in this context?if u struggled hard to avoid fornication(ie having sex with your girlfriend/boyfriend),u would find it easier to be faithful to your spouse,all things being equal. i say all things being equal because so many factors may lead a man or woman to cheat on his wife/husband even when he/she never thought,planned or even dreamt of it.But i know it is doable;there are many men/women who married as virgins in their late 20s who are still faithful to their mates several years into marriage.its just a matter of how much u love and fear GOD.
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SeeWhy (f)
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According to statistics, there are more women than men in the world, So maybe the guys feel since there are more than enough women to go round, why not have as many as u can inside or outside of marriage,
So ladies, Beware!
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omoovie (f)
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omoovie, while I really agree with your post, your line about him looking like Pa Ajascio is a little off. If women are expected to still try to look good after marriage, childbirth ayda yada, I expect the guy to also put effort in looking good and staying quite fit.
My dad's going to be 60 in a couple of years and I can swear to you, many people tell me he looks no more than 41. He's quite obsessed with staying healthy and my mom defeinitely appreciates it.
@ D-reloaded: I am with you on wanting my man to be just as attractive to me as he expects me to be to him. I'm lucky enough to have one of those men that believes in this truly (He's Indian go figure!). What I meant was, while it's "easier" for most women to condone their spouses being less "attractive" as when they met them (I think this is because women value intimacy and trust in their spouse over appearance. How many women have you seen walking around with rather unattractive men? A whole bunch!), our society feels if a man puts on weight and develops what I call "michelin neck" it is a sign that he is "chopping life" but our men expect us to look 100% all the time  forgetting this is a human being you married and human beings are fallible. This isn't only in our culture. It's everywhere. If a woman is lucky to have a spouse that puts in an equal amount of work in the marriage as she then she is def. blessed (Your mum is a lucky woman just like my mum. My dad made sure he was always fresh and made sure he put in just as much work as my mum including doing house hold chores and getting us ready for school. This made him more of a man IMHO!). But so few men are that way these days so more often than not we have to settle for 80% or 85%. Does that suck? Yes. Can we do anything concrete about it right now? No, I don't see how. |
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dapsycool (m)
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Yes it is! Infact it's compulsory! So if i get married at age 27, i'll have to stick with one honeypot till forever,lets say 50 years digging one location! Mineral resources for don finish there self. God forbid! Evil thing. Just advice your man to wear condom.
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bababuff (m)
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Is the girlfriend single or married?  
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Sisikill
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Sisikill, thanks for your commendations. The ladies/girls we av nowadys are killing, its only natural for men to react to what they see. even if they don't want to react their little Johns will react(if u know what i mean). see more pics of y men will cheat. Men were made to be moved by what they see. Wives should also understand this, so they should as well be dressing sexy at home so that it can reduce the no of attempts their hubby will go outside. with women dresses like this below, even me go look twice or thrice    Rotflmao. . . How do I love a man who accepts he IS weak? A Man who does not pretend he can control his sexual urges? A Man who knows the mere sight of a woman's boobies can render him useless for the rest of the day? Let me count the ways. . . By the way, YOU ARE VERY WELCOME  |
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ferdiii (m)
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I think married men now or unmarried men then were once seduced and appreciated by now married women. Why do women always want to have their cake and eat it too? It baffles me a lot. So the seduced and gotten men before are now weak men? C'mon lady, do you know I've got a wife? It doesn't matter but now it matters!! What goes around comes around and since we all flirted and messed up before marriage, why the hullabaloo? It's a case of one of the two elements keeping a low profile depending when the other is weak in finances or health and it gets its nature fully out. We all know few people married with virginity intact, and now someone is a judge.
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ferdiii (m)
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am with you on wanting my man to be just as attractive to me as he expects me to be to him. I'm lucky enough to have one of those men that believes in this truly (He's Indian go figure!). What I meant was, while it's "easier" for most women to condone their spouses being less "attractive" as when they met them (I think this is because women value intimacy and trust in their spouse over appearance. How many women have you seen walking around with rather unattractive men? A whole bunch!), our society feels if a man puts on weight and develops what I call "michelin neck" it is a sign that he is "chopping life" but our men expect us to look 100% all the time forgetting this is a human being you married and human beings are fallible. This isn't only in our culture. It's everywhere. If a woman is lucky to have a spouse that puts in an equal amount of work in the marriage as she then she is def. blessed (Your mum is a lucky woman just like my mum. My dad made sure he was always fresh and made sure he put in just as much work as my mum including doing house hold chores and getting us ready for school. This made him more of a man IMHO!). But so few men are that way these days so more often than not we have to settle for 80% or 85%. Does that suck? Yes. Can we do anything concrete about it right now? No, I don't see how.
____________________________________________________________ _______________________
Yes we can do something about it----stay away from marriage!
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jonjon (f)
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I heard a man today, when asked why he had to have a child from his mistress (she orchestrated the pregnancy, not him) he said because, his wife only had boys and no girl. When his friends asked him if his wife was aware of the "outside" child he shivered and begged all of them not to tell.
I think a real man, saint or sinner MUST own up to his misdeeds ANYWHERE ANYTIME. Don't blame it on anyone else. Learn to say, "Yes, I did it and nobody forced me, i just felt like doing it.
If your wife takes a walk, it's just a consequence of your action and you can choose to go and beg her or not. Accept the blame, face the consequences and move Ahead. Gbam!
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ehie007 (m)
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@sisikill How do I love a man who accepts he IS weak?
A Man who does not pretend he can control his sexual urges?
A Man who knows the mere sight of a woman's boobies can render him useless for the rest of the day?
Let me count the ways. . women make men weak. |
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kola oloye (m)
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Yes it is! Infact it's compulsory! So if i get married at age 27, i'll have to stick with one honeypot till forever,lets say 50 years digging one location! Mineral resources for don finish there self. God forbid! Evil thing. Just advice your man to wear condom.
If you are not a xtian, FINE but if you are - then you should forget another woman. Its as simple as that |
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omowon
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The day i read about FORNICATION AND ADULTERY in the BIBLE, i was afraid and decided to tell my husband and leave him to his conscience.
The Holy Bible said that whosoever commit sin either anger,stealing does it to hurt his fellow BUT whoever commit FORNICATION OR ADULTERY sins against his own flesh and THE TEMPLE OF GOD.The BIBLE ALSO ASKED IF YOU CAN TURN THE TEMPLE OF GOD TO THE TEMPLE OF A WHORE AND HE SAID (GOD FOBBID).I pray that our MEN discovers themselves and know that any women they meet at any time that is not their wife brings problems and disaster to their life which might manifest now or later.
I PRAY THAT HOLY SPIRIT WILL INTERPRETE THIS TO ALL THE MEN THAT READS THIS
AMEN AND AMEN
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SENATOR JD (m)
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AMEN there aint nothing traditional about it. extra marital affair is adultery and norhing else |
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Joseph6 (m)
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hi looking 4 a girlfriend. anyone. henry007 is a cruek. and a player this is an example or 1
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kjott (f)
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if its a tradition then its a bad one i must say,the bible clearly states that,my people perish for lack of understanding.so i also say that these married men who keep girlfriends are either ignorant of the consequences or are willing to perish.
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stave9ja (m)
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my question is why can't women stop chasing we guys expecially if you are well to do and confortable
don't ladies think it makes we guys look like small gods on demand
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ox-penny (m)
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It is not traditional at all. But Girls won't allowed married men to rest whether it is poverty or moral decadence i don't know. Go to Campuses n u will see what I'm talking about. What i always say is that any Girl that sleeps with someone's hubby will have her own hubby slept with  |
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pussy55l
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please i am interested in Africa tradition, i need guide, some body should give me some guide line on what yoruba Nigeria tradition look like. well i am from USA and i meet a Nigerian in a Model school who is proposing to marry me, but i am scared
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May kelly (f)
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The day i read about FORNICATION AND ADULTERY in the BIBLE, i was afraid and decided to tell my husband and leave him to his conscience.
The Holy Bible said that whosoever commit sin either anger,stealing does it to hurt his fellow BUT whoever commit FORNICATION OR ADULTERY sins against his own flesh and THE TEMPLE OF GOD.The BIBLE ALSO ASKED IF YOU CAN TURN THE TEMPLE OF GOD TO THE TEMPLE OF A WHORE AND HE SAID (GOD FOBBID).I pray that our MEN discovers themselves and know that any women they meet at any time that is not their wife brings problems and disaster to their life which might manifest now or later.
I PRAY THAT HOLY SPIRIT WILL INTERPRETE THIS TO ALL THE MEN THAT READS THIS
AMEN AND AMEN
I feel your pain about this whole mess called relationship/fun-fornication & adultery. BUT ARE WE ACTUALLY COMMUNICATING TO PEOPLE HERE? |
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swoosh (m)
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The real issue is with the girls who knowingly sleep with married men. I'm glad a lady started this post- ladies, and only them, have the power to stop this mess
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swoosh (m)
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One question for all the ladies who have responded to this post: Have you ever slept with a married man that is not your husband?
If your answer is 'NO' - you have my respect
If your answer is 'YES' - just shut up
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techzone
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The ratio of Married ladies to Single ladies is 1:100
They are legions and everly available. Without self control and genuine fear of God, it is almost impossible to overcome.
Every married men has faced this norm in our society, but some didn't fall for it.
Ultimately, I believe your wife should be able to give you EVERYTHING you want in a woman. That is the main reason why we men should marry
Guys, please let me know if am wrong.
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May kelly (f)
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One question for all the ladies who have responded to this post: Have you ever slept with a married man that is not your husband?
If your answer is 'NO' - you have my respect
If your answer is 'YES' - just shut up
I don't really blame the ladies, but i blame the men. who even after saying NO they keep on pesting over the lady; of course what do you want the lady to do to continue saying NO or Yes . The worst of it is that some men at far as 55, 60 and above still see themselves as young bobos or boy; see them, they will be wooing a girl of 13yrs, 15 and to 17 maximum bracket for them; hear them, eeh no "woman is small". Ladies what do you think "I call those set of men "HE GOAT" |
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blackchief (m)
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NOT FOR OR AGAINST
But even in the bible, in The Great Religion and past history man have always had more than one wife/girlfriend.
I think is time we seat down a people in Nigeria and the world at large to look at this issue.
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blackchief (m)
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NOT FOR OR AGAINST
But even in the bible, in The Great Religion and past history man have always had more than one wife/girlfriend.
I think is time we seat down as people in Nigeria and the world at large to look at this issue. I strongly believe among the two (man & woman) one may not be getting enough of some that is leading to the problem at hand.
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Terminator
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Yes it is wrong 4 anyone to have extra marital affair.
But why must men always be blamed 4 all the woes in the world? If you believe in he Bible, a woman by the name Eve started all this wahala. We talk about size of dicks never that of pussies, we talk about men infidelity never the contributions of women to it. Please enough is enough. If you ve problem with your man going outside, take a good look at yourself and ask yourself questions before blaming the man. Women are almost as worst as men. What a man can do they say women can do better.
It takes 2 to tangle. Women are as guilty as men.
A simple explanation may be that ladies often have more sex when younger than men. So the man is trying to catch up. Women only settle down in their late 20s or 30 and above. B4 then, they are always firing on all cylinders.
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May kelly (f)
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Please enough is enough. If you ve problem with your man going outside, take a good look at yourself and ask yourself questions before blaming the man. Women are almost as worst as men. What a man can do they say women can do better.
It takes 2 to tangle. Women are as guilty as men.
A simple explanation may be that ladies often have more sex when younger than men. So the man is trying to catch up. Women only settle down in their late 20s or 30 and above. B4 then, they are always firing on all cylinders.
EVE is as innocent as the Angel. God Created man in the Garden gave man instructions which man pass on to the wife. Even before creation of Eve, God usually have fellowship with man. Man has known God better than Eve (woman). The question is: WHERE IS THE MAN? When Eve ate the apple?.Answer:: Is because Man was and still is Irresponsibly, hence chasing Eve (woman) every where. WHEN EVE GAVE MAN THE APPLE, WHY DID MAN EAT IT? Answer: Because they want to test every apple in the world – hence disobeying God again by not keeping his commandment which says “DO NOT COMMIT ADULTERY” Eve eat the apple and left for the husband (good woman), she was not and still is not selfish. But the Husband did not reject rather always looking for an excuse “ IT IS THE WOMAN” where you blind when you where eating the apple Adam? I strongly blame the Man in our society today for every wrong happening. |
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tundetolu
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it is never a tradition for a married man to have a girl friend, just that we have selfish men in this part of the world, they are selfish because they don't have the fear of GOd.
is not their fault anyway, it is the sinful nature of man (i.ehuman) to sin and fornication is part of it. if there is anybody that have such problem tell the person to receive christ, that is the only person that can make us rigtheous.
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May kelly (f)
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it is never a tradition for a married man to have a girl friend, just that we have selfish men in this part of the world, they are selfish because they don't have the fear of GOd.
is not their fault anyway, it is the sinful nature of man (i.ehuman) to sin and fornication is part of it. if there is anybody that have such problem tell the person to receive christ, that is the only person that can make us rigtheous.
Yes i believe you. really they are selfish and needs the fear of GOD. |
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Terminator
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@May Kally
I strongly agree with your point about most evil in d society been due to men. But also note that it was the 1st woman eve that started the wahala and left the man to fix it. If not 4 Eve, i would be in the garden of Eden now drinking champagne on rock.
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