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sweetberry (f)
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i was checking a group on facebook which brought back so many memories !!!!!! some of the common catchphrases parent use to use for the kids, please share yours
let me start
I gave birth to you, i will kill you and go scott free, useless child!
I'm talking you're talking how many talkers are their in this talking conversations
I was always on top of my class
why none of you got my quality
You will not kill me shoti gbo, I did not kill my mother so you will not kill me, MY GOD will not allow you to kill me!
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tRoOE (f)
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One phrase i dislike when my mom uses to use it
(Momo) I didn't talk to my own parents like that, and don't forget your own children will do the same
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morenike09 (f)
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wow, poster. . . .the worst my mom ever told me was  "why can't you be patient, you rush things too much." " you're too stubborn, ask anyone, i was never like that when i was your age" " i am your mother, anything i say goes" "dnt argue with me, i know what am talking about. " "i told you, didn't i? you just dnt listen. i know what i say when i say them" |
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ifyalways (f)
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. . . . memories  my mums worst lines for me has been : "No sinner shall go unpunished" it makes me fell so bad and erhm. . . .afraid. "i am telling you now,am doing my part" scaryyyyyyyyyyyyyyy too "ukpana okpoko gburu,nti chiri ya" one heavy igbo proverb sha. For punishments its always been this: copy psalm 119 thrice  |
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stillwater (f)
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My mom would go like this I hate this one in particular-- Can't you use you number 6? (brains)   Anybody that says I did not train you well, thunder will fire you and the person Don't want to use my real name but she would go like this (name) I told you not to do this and you did it
(name) Did I ever tell you I wanted fresh bitter leaf, I remeber telling you to get me Ugu |
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mukina2 (f)
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wow, poster. . . .the worst my mom ever told me was "why can't you be patient, you rush things too much." " you're too stubborn, ask anyone, i was never like that when i was your age" " i am your mother, anything i say goes" "dnt argue with me, i know what am talking about. " "i told you, didn't i? you just dnt listen. i know what i say when i say them" girl you took this right out of my keyboard also when were you born? to put me firmly in my placewhen you do things remember you'll have kids someday |
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morenike09 (f)
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girl you took this right out of my keyboard also when were you born? to put me firmly in my placewhen you do things remember you'll have kids someday LOL. . . my mom is too superstitious, she does not talk about my kids to get back at methe worst she ever said was. . . "I hope your kids are not stubborn like you because its not heredity" see this woman wey dey talk, she's more stubborn than me but my mom scares me sometimes with stories of what happens when you dnt listen to your mother. . . man, i know i should not believe, but she's a good story teller, so i rarely misbehave |
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mukina2 (f)
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LOL. . . my mom is too superstitious, she does not talk about my kids to get back at methe worst she ever said was. . . "I hope your kids are not stubborn like you because its not heredity" see this woman wey dey talk, she's more stubborn than me me i was a rebel sometimes eh so when she says that i start behaving well well . dnt want no kid of mine to do that to me |
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HR.hotness (f)
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Anybody that says I did not train you well, thunder will fire you and the person lol, thats hilarious My mums a big softy so when i gets angry she gets brutal just to make a point her favorite was "as long as u live under my roof u will do as i say" ( i tried running away a number of times but i had no where to go ) "u devil child, i will beat the evil out of u" or "i will beat the uselessness out of u" (depending on how bad i was and then she'd proceed to whoop my ass) LOL, those were the days |
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Gamine (f)
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My mum hardly said such lines. YOU don't HAVE ANOTHER MOTHER!!!!!! was her favorite. Then she'd just use anything in her reach to beat you. Cane Bottle pot keg shoe that thing they use for turning eba/amala/semo e.t.c |
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HR.hotness (f)
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LOL
my mums weapon was whatever shoe she was wearing,
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morenike09 (f)
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@Gamine bottle ke?  my mom use whips, if she can't find one, she makes me go and look for one |
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big father (m)
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Mothers can be very funny atimes ,my father hardly ever complains. My mum usually goes; Omo ti o ba so pe iya ohun o ni sun,omo na gan o ni fi oju kan oru n !  Meaning : A child that says his mother will not sleep,the child will definately not sleep too ! And another annoying part is that she compares me with the neigbour's children,saying those ones are far more better than i am,meeennnn that statement really got me so crazy >:(then but thank God she is really enjoying the fruit of her labour. No more odd statement ! |
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nwando
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My mom when she got angry would say
These children,you people won't kill me.
God will not allow me to utter any bad word
I won't say your kids should treat you the way you've treated me yet she said it
I'm not training you so I can eat you , it is for you to be useful to yourself
then the one I hated the most,since I was a tomboy growing up,loved to climb trees and play ball with the boys
don't you know you're a girl,what do you call those things growing on your chest
the above made me maaaaaaaaaaaaaad
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D-reloaded (f)
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It's either you bend or you break Mo Omo ti o ba so pe iya ohun o ni sun,omo na gan o ni fi oju kan oru n ! Meaning : A child that says his mother will not sleep,the child will definately not sleep too ! My brother gets this all the time. |
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nwando
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and another one she meant as an "abuse" which I loved was.
You're always arguing , exactly like your father
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nwando
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then my dad's favorite which was usually to the boys.
You people are useless
anuofia
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morenike09 (f)
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You're always arguing , exactly like your father
loli seriously hate when my mom tells me this " You'll not continue to be as stubborn and disobedient as your father, as long as i am your mother" and "If i slap you, you will meet Jesus and come back to earth" |
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mukina2 (f)
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@Gamine bottle ke? my mom use whips, if she can't find one, she makes me go and look for one my grandmother's favourite game . sending me to go find the whip i would go happily not knowing its for me |
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nwando
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My maternal grandma's favorite
may your stomach migrate into the position of your nose
that one scared me
My paternal grandma would say
May you die of bloody diarrhoea
me grandmas had bad mouth
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4Him (m)
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My mom: You see, normal children . . . that was the signal to start yawning
. . . that is what we are saying.
. . . a normal child.
. . . if you like break your head on the wall.
. . . When we were your age.
. . . If i catch you ehn
My dad: When your friends see the scratches on your body they will know a lion lives in this house.
. . . quickly, quickly.
. . . You'll see what i'll do for you this night.
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morenike09 (f)
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rotflmao. . . @ the lion part |
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nwando
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rotflmao. . . @ the lion part that line is too much. love it. Anybody that says I did not train you well, thunder will fire you and the person The above from stillwater is still cracking me up I think most mothers used thunder in one way or another but this one is not just for the child but for any one that questions her motherly skills 2 in 1 thunder ROFL |
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Gamine (f)
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My mum used to teach , so she had canesss i think they distributed them at her school if she sent us to get , we would not return besides she didnt hv that time. My dad never spoke harshly to us, the highest thing he did to me when i stayed out very late at a friends was to write on two fullscap sheets "i will never stay out late again" one of my most memorable punishments was to drink 10 bottles of water! one wikid aunty like that, cnt remember what i did! |
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sweetberry (f)
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funny that i can relate to some of the post!!!!!!
oh my daddy when we have done something bad he always say "go and choose your belt" and we tend to choose the medium one because if you choose the small one he will go and choose the biggest of all
my mum never beats you suddenly apart from slaps, what my mum says is i will beat you this evening, oh the mental toture!!! i won't be able to eat, play or whatever all i will be thinking about is the beating i will be getting that night
when my mummy is really angry she tends to end all her sentences with "nonsence and ingredient"
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sweetberry (f)
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i have a younger brother (16 years)
anytime i go home they always arguing
bro: If you touch me I'll call social services
Dad: If you call them, I'll beat them, then I'll beat YOU!
& my favorite
Mark this day on your calender you were reborn!!!!!
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Scopium
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i have a younger brother (16 years)
anytime i go home they always arguing
bro: If you touch me I'll call social services
Dad: If you call them, I'll beat them, then I'll beat YOU!
& my favorite
Mark this day on your calender you were reborn!!!!!
That's real funny. Let your bro come to Naija and call social service. |
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Scopium
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There was a certain time my parents thought I've gone BADDER than I really was when I was in the boarding school and that annoyed me. They accused me of things I never even imagined. They said if I don't listen to them I'll grow up useless. My mum will always say
When you walk in the street people will point at you and say 'see that useless child'.
One day I was so pissed and my mum said that again and I retorted
When you walk in the street people will point at you and say 'see the mother of that useless child'.
She was so shocked. From that day she stopped saying that. And I felt very bad. I planned for eternity on how to apologise but couldn't do it. That's like 10 years now and I didn't grow up useless!
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Glorya (f)
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my mom is the 'i will beat u' type who never gets to doing the beating. The only weapon she has is i will tell your daddy, then come and see begging. All the mummy please and mummy i promise will then come out from our mouths.
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Zandra1 (f)
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LMGAO @ thread. Lots of funny replies . |
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bawomolo (m)
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bloody fool
aye le n gbadun
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