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dachosen1 (f)
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I'm an 19 year old teenager who gave birth to the most beautiful twins 2 years ago. I thank God every day for them and everything that has happened to me in my life. But I do have one question why is it that when you have a child with a man or woman in the nigerian community they are considered your husband or wife. As far as I'm concerned I do not see a ring on my finger.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY JEREMIAH AND MARIAH AKA TAIWO AND KEHINDE.
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hot-angel (f)
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That's just the nigerian way of thinking. It's not neccessarily with teens. Even if you're an older person, the father of your kids is like "your husband" -- "oko e". U know something like that.
But i must say, from the topic, i tot u were going to ask a different question. As in how nigerians (nigerian parents most especially) react to teenage pregnancy.
It's all good tho.
Say happy bday to ur kids. I'm glad u r a proud mother. Aww twins. i want twins. (not now tho).
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DaHitler (m)
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Don't sweat it, kids would always love their mom more than their dad.
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hot-angel (f)
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Don't sweat it, kids would always love their mom more than their dad.
Hello!!! STOP GENERALIZING!!! NOT 'always'. Yes i know what I'm saying. |
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sade511 (f)
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I know you workin hard with those twins.
I don't know. . . . .
Happy B Day Taiwo Kehinde!
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dachosen1 (f)
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As a matter of fact. I'm working very hard but it isnt anything that I can't handle. I got my friends, baby daddy, and family supportin and helping me when I need help so it makes it easier. I couldn't be more happier. THank you so much for wishing the kids a happy birthday. Parenthood isnt an ez task if u rn't going to be committed think twice before sexual intercourse
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Seun (m)
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Coming from someone who has actually experienced teen pregnancy, that's a warning to be taken seriously. Send our love to your half-Nigerian twins!  |
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chinani (f)
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So, I'm guessing you're the non-Nigerian one? Well to answer your question it is b/c people typically do not have babies w/o being married in the Nigerian community. I guess it's becoming more common in America but back home it is not the typical, run of the mill thing that it is in the States. Also, it they might say it to be respectful or tactful. Imagine them assuming your an unwed teen mother (not a good thing in their eyes) when you were infact somene's bride.  That'D be wahala for sure. So it's easy to say "husband" and be corrected. Happy Birthday TAIWO! Happy Birthday KEHINDE! Here's a  from Auntie!!  |
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mochafella (m)
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Happy Birthday TAIWO! Happy Birthday KEHINDE!
erm, I think you are a day late.  yeah, I know better late than never |
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chinani (f)
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erm, I think you are a day late. yeah, I know better late than neverHmm, how do you know? Since when have you been in Dachosen1's biz like that? Are you baby daddy?   |
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mochafella (m)
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Hmmm, how do you know? Since when have you been in Dachosen1's biz like that? Are you baby daddy? Well her post was yesterday  . As for baby daddy, ummm  . |
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chinani (f)
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Well her post was yesterday . As for baby daddy, ummm . According to my computer, her post was TODAY at approximately 1 pm. Thank you Inspector Gadget! |
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mochafella (m)
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HAPPY BIRTHDAY JEREMIAH AND MARIAH AKA TAIWO AND KEHINDE.
According to my computer, her post was TODAY at approximately 1 pm.
sure about that? . Must be Nwoke's clock playing tricks.  |
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nemesisrev
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the usual fraff  |
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markesh (m)
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Americans and teen pregnancy, that is the real question. Why do so many black american women allow themselves to get impregnated by men who do not stay with them? You are creating a society of criminals that way, because say what you want, children raised by a mother alone are always more out of control than those from a full family.
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bolex (m)
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you should hide your head in corner for crying out so proudly Instead of praising yourself as if you just won a contract When you get a certificate and a professional job ( not a job in Walmart or Kroger ) I will praise you for your mistake Not now For now SHAMEBy the way Children are commitment They would not want to grow up not knowing who their dad is So girl , you gotta stick to what you started that man aka father is their daddy and therefore aka your husbandgirl, you in College or something What is your progress and what have you got to say to guys et gals out there about SEX et al Say it here http://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-13000.0.htmlNow, I suggest I expect something sensible from someone as experienced as you  that's ma 15th cent God bless your kids and you AMEN |
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somebody (f)
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You are creating a society of criminals that way, because say what you want, children raised by a mother alone are always more out of control than those from a full family. Rubbish. I lost my dad when I was quite young and I am not out of control, neither are my siblings. It is very wrong to generalise like that. |
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Orikinla (m)
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Bolex says it all. Black girls in the US are on sex rampage. Too much psychedelic rap music is to blame for the black babes spreading their legs wide apart for randy men on the prowl to screw them and screw up innocent lives. The sooner you start loving the legitimate father of your T and K, the better for you and the future of your innocent twins. God bless you soul sister and kiss my kisses to your lovely T and K. Twins are double portion of blessings. So, treasure them. N.B: Who will the father of the next children? 50 Cents? |
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babwilms (m)
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@markesh. But wouldn't you agree that 80% of kids born without a father figure in Europe and America are always out of control and it creates a society of criminals. You can conduct a survey on this and you would find out that most yobs and criminals on the street here in the western world have no father figures in their lifes, probably daddy or mummy is in jail, drug addict, alcholic, not responsible, divorced, hence the children are always the one to suffer for the consequences unless the mother or the father stands firm to take care of their responsibilities very well and pray that the kids turn out well.
Also the way the laws and society here has been structured does not help matter. Imagine not been able to discipline your child because of the fear you might get jailed for it or the kid might be taken a way from you to foster parents.
Example of this can be seen in the UK where by a 12 year old girl was pregnated by a 15 yeard old boy. The girl is not even a teenager yet. The mother said she was proud of her, she is a heavy smoker with no husband. Same thing is most likely to happen to the unborn child. Who do you blame for this scenerio?
Also here in Europe you see kids calling the cops on their parent? I beg it's messed up in this western world. I can't wait to return to Nigeria, and i pray Nigeria do not follow the western ways in dealing with issues with regards to dicipline.
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babwilms (m)
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@markesh. My post was directed to you not MARKESH
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babwilms (m)
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Sorry, same mistake again. My post was directed to SOMEBODY not Markesh. Apologies
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ontop (m)
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It is unfortunate that most Nigerian men don't like to marry ladies who has kids for other men. They believed that single mothers has already been devalued and there is nothing special about them anymore.
Nigerian and Africans as a whole celebrates virgines. Our cultures so much embresses it to the extend parents disown their daughters who got into such mess.
I must confess that it is lack of exposures. If I love a lady amd wish to spend the rest of my life with her, I will not consider that at all.
I want to ask nairlanders, how many of you guys will not mind marrying a single mother?
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bolex (m)
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ontop
definitely not
except if the man was also a single father or something like that
anywayz
if i am a bachelor
i wd go shopping for someone who has never married before or anything like that
single and searching
not someone who has complicated her life
it is unfortunate
but yer
it is the fact
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babwilms (m)
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I would be worried to marry such woman and yes i am exposed. I could only marry her if she is wifey material but if she is not, no way. I mean you see some single mothers in Night clubs every now and then, when they are meant to be at home looking after that child, knowing what that child is up to. Most of them even go to some extent of sleeping around and they demand too much from a thsi new guy. Some still haven't learn from their mistakes.
I will only get married to a single mother if she's a wifey material.
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bolex (m)
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I could marry someone like 2can if I was older She is a responsible single mum |
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bolex (m)
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@ papermoon I feel you but the truth is bitterAfter a mistake I expect her to belt up and make a better profession Anywayz By the way How simple is life for teen mothers like duh!!!!!!! It is complicated for them but why, if God says they will find a husband Sure they would You think I am not happy she aint aborted yet ? Duh !!!! of course I am but I aint giving her praises yet ? Until she becomes a professional Besides, NO 1 IS PERFECT !!!!!!happy Birthday to Twins |
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Skidoc (m)
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There are many factors I would consider before doing such. I can't jump all out and say "I don't mind" just so that some people somewhere would think I don't lack exposure. As much as I might love such a woman, I don't want complications. So I'D put love aside and think deep - evaluating and weighing all the odds. If the positive outweighs the negative, then her baby can be our little bride or ring bearer at the wedding. |
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bolex (m)
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Exactly skidoc By the way, not all mothers would say their son should marry someone who has a son I know ma mother for 1 would not want to But wait The 1st thing that crosses your mind when you see a single mother is How responsible is she ?If am lieing Quote me wrong I just gave ma 16th cent |
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2cantango (f)
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I wonder how judgemental you blokes would be if you were the ones getting pregnant instead of the females Some dudes go around acting all holy and virginal, being strict about what they would and would not accept in their future wife, while totally overlooking that their own dxck has dipped into several honey pots along the way to the alter. |
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