Must He Marry The Girl He Impregnated?

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Date: July 26, 2008, 07:49 AM
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Nairaland Forum  |  General Discussion  |  Religion (Moderator: mukina2)  |  Must He Marry The Girl He Impregnated?
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Author Topic: Must He Marry The Girl He Impregnated?  (Read 321 views)
godsonadex
Must He Marry The Girl He Impregnated?
« on: May 08, 2008, 01:36 PM »

I want to get thoughts on this. I have a pal who is a christian, he had a baby with a girl but he has no love for the girl to warrant marriage, although he will be a good father to the little baby, he does not want to marry this girl, is him not marrying this girl a sin according to the bible? Please no criticism, just want creative suggestions, this guy has been criticised enough!!![b][/b]
niya (m)
Re: Must He Marry The Girl He Impregnated?
« #1 on: May 08, 2008, 02:16 PM »

Well i don't think he has to marry her but he has a great responsibility for the upbringing of the child. 
zarazara
Re: Must He Marry The Girl He Impregnated?
« #2 on: May 09, 2008, 12:07 AM »

I don't think he has to marry her because they have a child together, unless he has clearly heard from God that she is his wife. He needs to make sure though that he sticks around, to be a father to the baby.
godsonadex
Re: Must He Marry The Girl He Impregnated?
« #3 on: May 09, 2008, 04:58 PM »

Guys thanks so far for your replies, please forum, I need more replies,
lucabrasi (m)
Re: Must He Marry The Girl He Impregnated?
« #4 on: May 09, 2008, 11:07 PM »

please don't sin against GOD and the little child,she was good enough to sleep with but not good enough to marry ??if he is a true christian then he will do the honurable thing and marry the girl,remember  a single leaf cannot fall off a tree without GOD knowing about it first and if he dares dump the girl he may marry someone else and not be a ble to have kids or the new woman having one problem or the other,GOD has made them for each other and d first sign is the pregnancy
~Lady~ (f)
Re: Must He Marry The Girl He Impregnated?
« #5 on: May 09, 2008, 11:50 PM »

lucabrasi, has explained it well.

She certainly was good enough to sleep with and produce a child, but not good enough to marry?Huh haba.

If a true Christian, he knows what to do.
OgaMadam (f)
Re: Must He Marry The Girl He Impregnated?
« #6 on: May 11, 2008, 06:43 PM »

Once a man sleeps with a woman he looses interest.

He has squeezed this orange but now he wants a fresh one.

However, he was fast to corrupt her, but not quick to cover her shame.

Indeed, One leaf will not fall.
huxley (m)
Re: Must He Marry The Girl He Impregnated?
« #7 on: May 12, 2008, 10:07 AM »

I wonder what the girl's views are. Would she want to marry this boy?  No one should feel obligated to do something because of cultural conditioning. If they think they are not suited for marriage, then they should go their various ways, bearing in mind the huge responsibility they both have over the child.
Jamco45
Re: Must He Marry The Girl He Impregnated?
« #8 on: May 12, 2008, 10:52 AM »

I don't think it will be fair on the woman if he marries her, he doesn't love her. It could promote disrespect in the relationship which will later develop to adultry and finally a devorce or second wife. I also don't think its fair on the child if his/her parents don't love each other.
But if you friend is strong enough spiritually and mentally he can make it work and the love will grow over time.


godsonadex
Re: Must He Marry The Girl He Impregnated?
« #9 on: May 12, 2008, 12:18 PM »

Thanks so far guys, it's good to have different points of view but in reply to those that think he 'wants fresh orange', this is not the case, he just doesn't feel anything for the girl (lovewise) and he has never felt in the past so it's not a case of him decieving her to get in her pants. The girl knows he doesn't love her but she loves him. They have both agreed that come what may, they will be pals and take responsibilities for the baby so the baby is in good hands in terms of getting love, affection and financial care. In light of this info, can i get more views please.
Ganjaseed
Re: Must He Marry The Girl He Impregnated?
« #10 on: May 12, 2008, 02:15 PM »

No feelings and Love,  Why de guy choop am without condom?
temiolumi (f)
Re: Must He Marry The Girl He Impregnated?
« #11 on: May 14, 2008, 04:42 PM »

@ poster

Why should your pal sleep with a girl he has no affection for?
Who will now marry d lady if he refuses to marry her after having d child?
can u as a person marry someone with a child for someone else?
Don't u as a person see that act as wickedness?
Who told u love desen't grow?
I feel he should marry d girl because what they did is a joint act.
The girl should not be d only one to bear the consequences of d act.
Please he must marry her.
bunmii (f)
Re: Must He Marry The Girl He Impregnated?
« #12 on: May 14, 2008, 04:50 PM »

nonsense so she was good to sleep with but not good enough to marry abi? if the girl want to marry he must marry her, they will learn to love each other.
stillwater (f)
Re: Must He Marry The Girl He Impregnated?
« #13 on: May 14, 2008, 04:56 PM »

Personally, if he doesn't love me, I won't marry him. Looks as if I'm forcing him or preferably "he's doing me a favor" by marrying him. Nonsense.
sheniqua
Re: Must He Marry The Girl He Impregnated?
« #14 on: May 14, 2008, 04:56 PM »

Quote from: bunmii on May 14, 2008, 04:50 PM
nonsense so she was good to sleep with but not good enough to marry abi? if the girl want to marry he must marry her, they will learn to love each other.

ROFL
by force marriage,whether he likes it or not.
I'm sure her parents feel the same way
Ujujoan (f)
Re: Must He Marry The Girl He Impregnated?
« #15 on: May 14, 2008, 06:10 PM »

@ poster

yes he must marry her!!
ty4real (m)
Re: Must He Marry The Girl He Impregnated?
« #16 on: May 14, 2008, 10:16 PM »

He must marry her!There is just too much sycophancy in christiandom,he climed and enjoyed the delicious fruit and she has brought forth a destiny for him,the guy shouldnt be selfish,he should marry her and not give the poor child her a wrong foundation.For him to have had sex with her in the first place connotes an element of attraction,so he can always grow in love and meanwhile who has the ability to Love as in Love the way God loves us!Abeg he should marry her and settle down and not subject the baby to single parenthood!abeg !bikonu! Smiley
OgaMadam (f)
Re: Must He Marry The Girl He Impregnated?
« #17 on: May 15, 2008, 05:37 PM »

He has soiled her.  In the bible days they had to get married.

does he think he will get away with this?
efosanice
Re: Must He Marry The Girl He Impregnated?
« #18 on: May 22, 2008, 02:11 PM »

the wedding should be conducted before the child is born to avoid the curse that looms on children born out of wedlock on the child, and the guy must live with his new wife and make her happy. if we are to be christians there is no other alternative all other suggestions of him not marrying her is sinfully wicked.
Godalone (m)
Re: Must He Marry The Girl He Impregnated?
« #19 on: May 22, 2008, 02:33 PM »

If your guy is a good christian he does not need any advice to marry the poor lady.Besides,she is not good for marriage but she is okay to sleep with,tell your guy to go and fix the wedding so that the innocent baby does not suffer .Infact the guy is callous.
reindeer
Re: Must He Marry The Girl He Impregnated?
« #20 on: May 22, 2008, 11:10 PM »

No, he should marry the one that impregnated him! Grin

on a more serious note, i don't think a real christian will ask this question, we all innately know whats right, attimes we ask for opinions hoping to hear that what we know is right should not be done, abeg marry whoever,just know that the Judge of the universe watches and knows all the intents of the heart of man.
let your spiritguide you.

Ivvie
Re: Must He Marry The Girl He Impregnated?
« #21 on: May 24, 2008, 08:33 PM »

He should know the girl better than any one of you should conclude. 
ayinba1 (f)
Re: Must He Marry The Girl He Impregnated?
« #22 on: May 24, 2008, 08:36 PM »

Would be the honorable thing to do.
belabela (m)
Re: Must He Marry The Girl He Impregnated?
« #23 on: May 26, 2008, 01:17 PM »

I do not support that a man should marry the lady he doesn't "love." But also a man has to take responsibilities for his actions. If this brother has made the mistake of defiling this damsel, the bible says he shall marry her Deut 22:29.

I understand that he made a mistake. But my dear poster tell your friend to do the right thing. He must marry her! that's what he scriptures say. Jesus didn't come to destroy the law. He explained in profound details wht they mean but for this case it is clear.

I am not married nor engaged but let me give your friend a counsel. Tell him that if he sees a "perfect woman" today and he marries her he shall see a better woman tomorrow. It's love and commitment that makes a happy godly home. Otherwise he would have no interest in any woman

However if the lady doen't want him, that is she doesnt want to marry him thenĀ  He is not bound in that circumstance. I Cor 7:15
godsonadex
Re: Must He Marry The Girl He Impregnated?
« #24 on: May 28, 2008, 04:00 PM »

Thank you all for your opinions, I am speechless! For those that gave sound advice, thanks, for those that just came to criticise, thank you too. Still feel free to comment and add bible scriptures when you can.
rubi (f)
Re: Must He Marry The Girl He Impregnated?
« #25 on: June 24, 2008, 11:13 PM »

I personally will not support the girl to marry him since he don't love her. There is nothing that happens that takes God unawares yes they have a child together maybe they were carried away by emotions but life goes on. I know the girl is emotionally down, but it is a matter of time she will get over it. Marriage is not based on emotions but based on conviction and favor.

  My advice to the girl is beautiful ones are not yet born
 Jesus Is Real - A Living Testimony  Is One Religion Superior Or Inferior To Others?  Shiloh 2007  Page 2
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