Adults Only

 #Communication Breakdown
Two 90 year olds had been dating for a while, when the man told the woman, "Well, tonight's the night  we have sex!"
And so they did.
As they are lying in bed afterward, the man thinks to himself, "My God, if I knew she was a virgin, I would have been much gentler with her!"
And the woman was thinking to herself, "My God, if I knew the old cargo could actually get it up, I would have taken off my panty hoes.


#What’s so funny?
A man walks into a pharmacy, buys a condom, then walks out of the store
Laughing hysterically. The pharmacist thinks this is weird, but, hey, there's
No law preventing weird people from buying condoms. Maybe it's a good thing.
The next day, the man comes back to the store, purchases another condom, and
Once again he leaves the store laughing wildly. This interest
the pharmacist, What's so funny about buying a rubber, anyway?
So he tells his clerk, "If this guy ever comes back, I want you to follow him
to see where he goes."
Sure enough, the next day the laugher is back. He buys the condom, starts
Laughing, then leaves. The pharmacist tells his clerk to go follow the
guy.
About an hour later, the clerk comes back to the store.
"Did you follow him? Where did he go?" asks the pharmacist.
The clerk replied “he went to your house”


#Twice a day
A man goes to see a doctors and complains saying "Doctor, doctor you have to help me
I just can't stop having sex!"
"Well how often do you have it?" asks doctor. "Well, twice a day I
Have sex with my wife, TWICE a day", he answers back.
"That's not so much", says the doctor. "Yes, but that is not all.
I have sex with my secretary, TWICE a day," replies the man.
"Well that is probably a bit excessive," says the doctor. "Yes, but
That’s not all. Twice a day I have sex with a prostitute, TWICE a day,"
Says the man. "Well, that's definitely too much", says the doctor.
"You've got to learn to take yourself in hand." "I do", says the man.
"Twice a day

 
# Study of the privates
    In 1993, the University of ile-ife did a study to see why the head of
   A man's privates was
   Larger than the shaft. After one year and they concluded
   That the reason the
   Head was larger than the shaft was to give the man more pleasure
   During sex.
   After the study was published, Ahmadu Bello university 
   Decided to do their own
   Study. After a 3 year research, they concluded that
   The reason was to
   Give the woman more pleasure during sex.
   The University of Nsuka unsatisfied with these findings, conducted
   Their own study.
   After 2 weeks, they concluded that it was
   To keep a man's
   Hand from flying off and hitting him in the fore head