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D-reloaded (f)
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@TOF how do we know if HE TRULY WANTED TO KEEP THE SIDE OF THE BARGAIN BY NOT BANGING SOMEONE ELSE ? . . . shit happens . . .at least from what he said, it was the girl making moves on him  and seriously too . . .what if this same guy had gone ahead to padlock his tool, only to find out sometime later that the girl aint a fergin . . .don't u think the guy will be mad at himself and the girl for all the squandered opportunities  P.S please tell sheniqua that am not Jackal, rather am his worst enemy on Nairaland If he didnt want to keep his side of the baragain he should have left the relationship. How hard is that to understand? and who cares if she's one or not. So because she MIGHT not be one, it's ok that he cheated on her? Are you ok? and if she REALLY IS ne n ko? Then what happens? You are sounding like him right now so why wont she confuse you two.
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RampantT (f)
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By Kitaun he could have done something not to have hurt his fiancee like what ? Yea, like not sleep with another girl when he already asked for her hand in marriage
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RampantT (f)
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HmmmmmmmmKitaun dude does sound like Jackalan imposter? 
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LadyT (f)
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This is not about her.
Its about him and his useless trouser snake.
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Dr Kitaun
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You REALLY EXPECT HIM TO LEAVE THE RELATIONSHIP JUST LIKE THAT?  do u think he would want his fergin land leave like that ? what of the emotional stress, financial stress and anything stress . . . SEE . . .NO MATTER HOW, COS A GUY FLIRTS, CHEATS OR BANGS F@CKEVER PERSON DONT MEAN THE GUY WILL WILLINGLY WANT TO GIVE UP A RELATIONSHIP what would he say ? sweetheart, am sorry to tell u this, but my mind will never be at rest if I don't tell u now, erm erm I kind of like erm erm . . .cheated on u . . .THAT SAID, METHINKS WE SHOULD PART SINCE I HAVE NOT BEEN FAITHFUL TO You, I HAVE NOT KEPT TO MY WORD, SO THEREFORE AM NOT WORTHY OF BEING CALLED UR MAN NO MORE  BULLSHIT ! 
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RampantT (f)
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You REALLY EXPECT HIM TO LEAVE THE RELATIONSHIP JUST LIKE THAT?  do u think he would want his fergin land leave like that ? what of the emotional stress, financial stress and anything stress . . . SEE . . .NO MATTER HOW, COS A GUY FLIRTS, CHEATS OR BANGS F@CKEVER PERSON DONT MEAN THE GUY WILL WILLINGLY WANT TO GIVE UP A RELATIONSHIP what would he say ? sweetheart, am sorry to tell u this, but my mind will never be at rest if I don't tell u now, erm erm I kind of like erm erm . . .cheated on u . . .THAT SAID, METHINKS WE SHOULD PART SINCE I HAVE NOT BEEN FAITHFUL TO You, I HAVE NOT KEPT TO MY WORD, SO THEREFORE AM NOT WORTHY OF BEING CALLED UR MAN NO MORE  BULLSHIT !  99% of the times, it's really berra not to know what's on a man's mind. . . Dr. Kitty (  ) just proved it 
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Dr Kitaun
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yeah rite . . . .  Kitaun is a trademark name on NAIRALAND on its own . .go figure 
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RampantT (f)
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yeah rite . . . .  Kitaun is a trademark name on NAIRALAND on its own . .go figure  Trademark? hmmm
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debosky (m)
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While he did mess up, he wanted to come clean and move on with his relationship with peace in his heart.
What he did was wrong yes - even if the chick was 'eyeing' or 'chasing' him, it was still wrong.
BUT, it does show that he had a modicum of integrity that he wanted to come clean with his fiancee and had long stopped any liaisons with the woman in question. While she will definitely be hurt, MOST men will NOT confess to such unless caught in the act or if someone reveals it to the woman, so give him at least some credit for that.
He values his relationship enough to want it on a clean sheet, so he is not all bad. Men do make mistakes, I don't think a relationship that was moving towards marriage should end just like that, even if he was unfaithful. She should take time to reconsider if necessary, but ending it like that will be hasty.
I repeat, he has very good qualities for deciding to own up to something he might NEVER be caught for/revealed. It takes great integrity to own up to your mistakes.
I believe she should forgive him and he should try to rebuild her trust.
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RampantT (f)
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I repeat, he has very good qualities for deciding to own up to something he might NEVER be caught for/revealed. It takes great integrity to own up to your mistakes.
eh en! What if baby mama comes backs with belle or what if the tramp tells his fiancee if he gets her angry? Eventually, the truth has a way of getting itself out of the open. Him telling his fiancee the wrong he did just speed up the time it'll take for the truth to come out. . . it makes him no less wrong!
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LadyT (f)
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Dr Kit
No one is above mistake but this mistake is his alone he should of confessed much earlier end of story.
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stillwater (f)
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I wonder if it were the woman that cheated he would still take her back 
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debosky (m)
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@ Rampant
No one is saying he is not wrong, he obviously wanted to make amends and move on in the relationship on a clean footing.
I know you ladies always advocate - 'he cheated! kick him out!' but how realistic is that? For her to have made him her fiancee, he must have certain good qualities she desires. No doubt he messed up, but will you throw away EVERYTHING because of that and start again? He has admitted his wrong of his own compulsion.
How many loose gals out there sleep with guys and never tell? puhleeze there is no guarantee she would've heard, if after 6 MONTHS it didn't come out, what use would it have later?
Forgive him and get on with your life. Men and women will make mistakes.
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Dr Kitaun
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@Debosky the womanizer  u don find your girlfriends come here abi ? I always knew u would want to dance to their tune  have u bothered to ask yourself why it took him so long to discover the relationship was taking a downward trend ? definitely the guy was acting funny . . .conscience dey bite am !  and the girl see say the guy don change . . .she begin dey suspectkasala dey build  lerra the guy come dey fear say whether the girl don hear anything or discover anything . . .gbege don about to burst  mean a-whiler . . .the guy kukuma come look say make hin yarn the girl . . .GONGO COME SO . . .  bottom line - - - -the guy aint sharp, he prolly is underaged talking about marriage  and when I say that I mean, he is not any prepared, he is prolly 21 and the girl 18, BUT AS HIN DON HEAR SAY THE GIRL NA FERGIN, HIN EARS DON TWITCH, NEXT THING NA SAY MAKE HIN DEY PROCLAIM AM HIN FIANCEE ! 
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LadyT (f)
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Stereotypes galore here  @ Rampant
No one is saying he is not wrong, he obviously wanted to make amends and move on in the relationship on a clean footing.
I know you ladies always advocate - 'he cheated! kick him out!' but how realistic is that? For her to have made him her fiancee, he must have certain good qualities she desires. No doubt he messed up, but will you throw away EVERYTHING because of that and start again? He has admitted his wrong of his own compulsion.
How many loose gals out there sleep with guys and never tell? puhleeze there is no guarantee she would've heard, if after 6 MONTHS it didn't come out, what use would it have later?
Forgive him and get on with your life. Men and women will make mistakes.
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RampantT (f)
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@ Rampant
No one is saying he is not wrong, he obviously wanted to make amends and move on in the relationship on a clean footing.
I know you ladies always advocate - 'he cheated! kick him out!' but how realistic is that? For her to have made him her fiancee, he must have certain good qualities she desires. No doubt he messed up, but will you throw away EVERYTHING because of that and start again? He has admitted his wrong of his own compulsion.
How many loose gals out there sleep with guys and never tell? puhleeze there is no guarantee she would've heard, if after 6 MONTHS it didn't come out, what use would it have later?
Forgive him and get on with your life. Men and women will make mistakes.
Well, am the kind of person that believes that "Once a cheater, always a cheater". So when they get married, would he tell her from fear of divorce? Likely not. What if he does tell her? You think she'll want to stay in the marriage? As the saying goes " A broken relationship is a berra than a broken marriage." Next time, plz dnt write me a long essay jo
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RampantT (f)
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@Debosky the womanizer  u don find your girlfriends come here abi ? I always knew u would want to dance to their tune  have u bothered to ask yourself why it took him so long to discover the relationship was taking a downward trend ? definitely the guy was acting funny . . .conscience dey bite am !  and the girl see say the guy don change . . .she begin dey suspectkasala dey build  lerra the guy come dey fear say whether the girl don hear anything or discover anything . . .gbege don about to burst  mean a-whiler . . .the guy kukuma come look say make hin yarn the girl . . .GONGO COME SO . . .  bottom line - - - -the guy aint sharp, he prolly is underaged talking about marriage  and when I say that I mean, he is not any prepared, he is prolly 21 and the girl 18, BUT AS HIN DON HEAR SAY THE GIRL NA [b]FERGIN, HIN EARS DON TWITCH, NEXT THING NA SAY MAKE HIN DEY PROCLAIM AM HIN FIANCEE ![/b]  What's a fergin sef? You've said that countless times.
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debosky (m)
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once a cheater always a cheater? Ok, you're still youngyou'll learn more in due time. I hope you find your perfect man waiting somewhere for you. @ Kit that is a very plausible explanaition, but i don't think its the virgin thing that is the issue why he confessed. If anything, he might not have done it if he was having sex in his relationship, who knows? Not that its an excuse, but there is value in his confession. A broken relationship is better, but on what basis do you decide to end the relationship based on ONE issue? Does it make sense to you? @ Kit ol boy you know how I roll jare 
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RampantT (f)
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once a cheater always a cheater?
Ok, you're still youngyou'll learn more in due time.
I hope you find your perfect man waiting somewhere for you.
Just because you're too old does not mean you know all ways of men. . . Men are like leopards, you can't change their spots. Once you've tasted the ways of cheating and she forgave you once, nothing's stopping you from doing it again.
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Dr Kitaun
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@Lady T yes ma !  I agree . . .  @Stillwater speaking from personal experience, I did take an ex back, but HER CONSCIENCE RAN HER OUT OF MY LIFE !  I will say the better it is/was for me. . . . LIFE GOES ON AND NOT ONLY THAT, BECOMES BERRA !  @Toyinrayo once a cheat . . .always a cheat ? sssssshhhhhhh . . . .enufff ! u don't know which angel is passing by  most people that always have that notion actually tend to become victims of such circumstances  meaning of FERGIN ? ask Debosky 
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RampantT (f)
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@Toyinrayo once a cheat . . .always a cheat ? sssssshhhhhhh . . . .enufff ! u don't know which angel is passing by  most people that always have that notion actually tend to become victims of such circumstances  meaning of FERGIN ? ask Debosky  I already explained what I meant by my quote. . . ok, and must you use everyone of my I.D on every post? Ika buruku  @debo What's a fergin? 
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debosky (m)
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she is a fergin/virgin - i.e the hymen is supposedly intact, who knows?
That aside, I feel the guy felt pressure from his loins, here is his lovely fiancee he has committed not to have sex with, and here is this vixen at work throwing herself at him, and he fell.
As a man with a conscience he decided (albeit belatedly) to tell his fiancee and so move on in the relationship with a clean heart. That doesn't sound like a serial cheater to me, just someone who fell at a weak moment. We are human beings and deserve second chances- all of us.
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RampantT (f)
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she is a fergin/virgin - i.e the hymen is supposedly intact, who knows?
That aside, I feel the guy felt pressure from his loins, here is his lovely fiancee he has committed not to have sex with, and here is this vixen at work throwing herself at him, and he fell.
As a man with a conscience he decided (albeit belatedly) to tell his fiancee and so move on in the relationship with a clean heart. That doesn't sound like a serial cheater to me, just someone who fell at a weak moment. We are human beings and deserve second chances- all of us.
Thanks for the meaningThat's like saying A man that kills 99th times should be given a chance to round his crime up to his hundredth?  If you can fall at a weak weak moment during your engagement, how many more times will you fall during your marriage?
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stillwater (f)
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Gosh you guys don't understand. . The thought of my fiancee with some other chic, images of them togetheryuuccckkkkkkk 
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RampantT (f)
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Gosh you guys don't understand. . The thought of my fiancee with some other chic, images of them togetheryuuccckkkkkkk  thank you jare!! The thing is what if he enjoyed the sex with her, then when it comes time for hubby/wife to join together, he gets disappointed?
*sigh* men can be pigs most times jare
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Dr Kitaun
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@Stillwater the thoughts of my chic and another man - - -the sight yeparipa ! BUT TO HELL LIFE GOES ON ! 
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stillwater (f)
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Do you think I believe you?
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debosky (m)
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@ stillwater no one is denying it is painful and HIGHLY disappointingit is, and you should re-evaluate some things and try to rebuild trust, but I DO NOT think I would end it over that alone. Especially if he's remosreful. The pain is very hurtful believe me, I should know  but the main question is this - are you going to focus MORE on that than the whole relationship you've built up? Or on the man's remorse? or the opportunity to grow stronger because of this incident?
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Dr Kitaun
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@Debosky once a cheat always a cheat o  now begin to confess your own sins and all the guys u cyber-dated and cyber-jilted 
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RampantT (f)
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@Debosky once a cheat always a cheat o  now begin to confess your own sins and all the guys u cyber-dated and cyber-jilted  Iwo nko?
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Dr Kitaun
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Legendary status  nothing do me . . .nothing dey kpa, anything wey kpa na winch 
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