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Leilah (f)
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Hi all, I'm just wondering is it quite normal in your own culture for your husband to attend the above without you?
This does not apply to me but I see this with others sometimes. I personally cannot and wont allow it and it has never been requested from me either. Are you of the same view? like whether you trust your partner or not, these places are no good for married men as they are easily tempted.
So, lets say your husband falls in the door at 4.00am and you had been ringing his phone through the night and he doesnt answer and switches it off like. I know one person who doesnt even bother to call her husband, she just prays and goes to bed. He comes in at anytime, no questions asked. Is this normal?
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sheniqua
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For you to even make a thread like this should tell you such behaviour is not normal.
First off I think married folks ought to keep away from places like that but that's just my opinion and if at all a husband insists on partying,why would he want to do it without his life partner, what is he hiding ?
Personally I would not tolerate such nonsense.
A woman lays the rules from day one on how she should be treated.
As for the one praying and going to bed while her man is jumping around,I do hope she can tell when he comes home with gonorrhoea,herpes,,syphilis and AIDS
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Leilah (f)
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yeah exactly, just there is one lady I know and she doesnt care where he is at all. She is terrified of him though. Anyway I was just wondering if Nigerian ladies allow these things. Thanks for your imput.
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sheniqua
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yeah exactly, just there is one lady I know and she doesnt care where he is at all. She is terrified of him though. Anyway I was just wondering if Nigerian ladies allow these things. Thanks for your imput.
I know a couple of women in the same boat too. There are many who would not allow it. That's why I hate the word "full time housewife" Lack of finances of their own is the main reason women take this rubbish and disrespect. Then again he must have been that way at courship,she knew what she was getting into. There's a lady I know whose husband would disappear for days and then reappear. He would go on vacations without her what nonsense Thank God he 's now gone for good. |
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D-reloaded (f)
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Hi all, I'm just wondering is it quite normal in your own culture for your husband to attend the above without you? You're becoming very annoying Leilah. I used to wonder why people would attack you for asking questions and speaking your mind. Now I know something is terribly wrong with you What kind of idiotis question are you asking? You could have just said "Would you allow your husband to go out partying without you", instead fo trying to make it a "culture issue". Since when have discotheques and such been Nigerian culture? Better stop being daft. Is it an odd thing only restricted to Nigerians where men go out and leave their dumb wives at home? Seriously you're beginning to annoy me. As for your "I would enver stand for it", Lmfao. Is this the same Lielah that can't even stop her husband for forcing anal sex, you want to act like you could stop your husband from going out without you? Lol. Some of us have very good memories, girl. Try again next time. |
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Uche2nna (m)
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Leilah, You again  How come You can take a whole bunch of sexually degrading acts from your husband (acts You don't like) but suddenly remenber You have rights as a wife when he wants to go out and party. Sorry, babe I can't believe You. Your story is full of inconsistencies. Or maybe there is something I am missing  |
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Arielle
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A lot of Nigerian men do it. At least 95% of men in night-clubs are married. "Hanging with the boys" is an every weekend affair: Friday, Saturday, Sunday. A huge number of them do not get home before midnight on weeknights as well. On weekends some make it home the following day, morning or afternoon. The older members of the family eg, parents, tend to gloss over this behaviour, reducing it to "one of those things", "teething problems in a marriage. Give it time", " He's a young man, he is still adjusting to marriage", or "just pray and bear it. He will change one day". Or " they're all like that. You can't change it."
That is the average Nigerian marriage. And in "giving it time" the woman lets him be and keeps praying. In doing so she she sets the tone of the marriage because we know that most of these men don't change, seeing her silence as acquiescence or "what can she do about it".
Sure he may change somewhere down the line, when he's about 50, a doddering old bore, who has lost his youth, looks, vitality and sometimes money. Of course then Madam is supposed to be grateful her husband now stays at home ("see? We told you to be patient!").
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stillwater (f)
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Lmao, that was good!!!!!!
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Xiomarra
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Hi all, I'm just wondering is it quite normal in your own culture for your husband to attend the above without you?
This does not apply to me but I see this with others sometimes. I personally cannot and wont allow it and it has never been requested from me either. Are you of the same view? like whether you trust your partner or not, these places are no good for married men as they are easily tempted.
So, lets say your husband falls in the door at 4.00am and you had been ringing his phone through the night and he doesnt answer and switches it off like. I know one person who doesnt even bother to call her husband, she just prays and goes to bed. He comes in at anytime, no questions asked. Is this normal?
Welcome back Leilah.  Does not bother me at all! You think I have time to play "domestic police" and "underwear sniffer"? That is really his business! You get to a certain stage in marriage and some things just don't bother you. I have enough confidence in myself. Any woman that is able to lure my husband out of his matrimonial home deserves him. I do no lose sleep over such things. As long as the bills are paid and the kids are taken care of, I really am not interested in his extra-curricular activities. What we can do together fine, what we cannot do together fine. I have a life you know. |
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Xiomarra
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I know one person who doesnt even bother to call her husband, she just prays and goes to bed. He comes in at anytime, no questions asked. Is this normal?
That is a very smart woman! Very normal for me oooooooooooooooooooh!  When you are dealing with a Nigerian man, you have to have a formula. Giving him to much attention by nagging is not my thing. If he is no longer interested in the marriage, I am sure he will let me know. Like I said, not bothered at all! Especially if he meets ALL his responsiblilites. He is not my lap dog and is free to come and go as he pleases!  Too late for all that "nagging" and unnecessary conflicts! Sometimes, I like to go away on my own too with the "girls"! He has no problems with that too. It is all a matter of understanding. He is a NIGERIAN man an you need to treat him as such. Concentrate on yourself and not him. When he gets whatever it is he is looking for outside, he will find his way home for sure! He really does not need your help. |
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Leilah (f)
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I just don't know why everyone on this forum hates me when I am trying to learn more about the culture. Obviously it is normal judging by the last poster.
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Leilah (f)
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yeah I have seen it amoung irish culture too but not as much as I have seen it amongst Nigerians here.
Toyin you can call me all the names you like.
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cescky (m)
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shut the phuck up you lunatic
"learning about the culture":
Are you crazy? Are you saying you've only heard such things in Nigerian households YOU BLOODY LIAR
culture my arse, you're full of shit
please u look too much of a lady for such comments or maybe u girls have personal issues? i tthink its really an innocent question |
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dee02 (m)
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shut the phuck up you lunatic
"learning about the culture":
Are you crazy? Are you saying you've only heard such things in Nigerian households YOU BLOODY LIAR
culture my arse, you're full of shit
haha  LMFAO for me, ko si big deal ooo if d husband wants to sleep inside, sweep and mop the disco house! |
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Builder
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D-Loaded, what has the babe done to warrant such abusive and negativities from you, it's a free world and people should be able voice whatever opinnion/ question/query they have , maybe if leila didnt paste her picture perhaps u will respond to her in a more meaningful way, It a beautiful world but ugly souls press the botton.
@ Poster, husbands should be free to frequest clubs and what not so long as they don't behave in a way deem misfit, besides, been a husband or wife shouldnt mean they should start ignoring their social lives. We are living in a pressurised world/ society and people need to relax and let go irrespective of culture.
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4Her (f)
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@post
atleast your Nigerian husband is not abusing you anymore. . .
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Uche2nna (m)
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I just don't know why everyone on this forum hates me when I am trying to learn more about the culture. Obviously it is normal judging by the last poster.
Leilah no-one hates You. At least, I don't. But hey, you too must agree that your story is gradually attaining legendary and folklore status on Nairaland. When You first came out with your marriage to one Nigerian, You really drew my sympathy. But as time went on ,. that gradually waned away. Cos it seems to me that You ACTUALLY DONT WANNA DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT. Thats ok by me as long as You don't go around singing it all around Nairaland threads. I really can't fathom how a man can treat You so bad and You endure it only to come to a public forum to cry wolf. You have always blamed your travails as a cultural thing ; Many ladies on Nairaland have told You that it is not true. your man is just a beast (sorry) but You seem to like your theory about culture better. It is far from our culture to have anal sex, matter of fact, that is more of an European thing than an African thing. Maybe I should ask if violence in marriage is a cultural thing for you. Cos it seems You are enjoying the violence that the guy is dishing out. Now You come out with going to parties/clubs without the wife? Not suprisingly, You want to attribute that to culture too (I wonder how much You know about this culture of ours ) . How can unfaithfulness be a cultural thing? |
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dee02 (m)
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Still KO SI BIG DEAL if Leilah decides to wash her dirty pants in public!!
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kingdong (m)
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You're becoming very annoying Leilah. I used to wonder why people would attack you for asking questions and speaking your mind. Now I know something is terribly wrong with you
What kind of idiotis question are you asking? You could have just said "Would you allow your husband to go out partying without you", instead fo trying to make it a "culture issue". Since when have discotheques and such been Nigerian culture? Better stop being daft. Is it an odd thing only restricted to Nigerians where men go out and leave their dumb wives at home? Seriously you're beginning to annoy me.
As for your "I would enver stand for it", Lmfao. Is this the same Lielah that can't even stop her husband for forcing anal sex, you want to act like you could stop your husband from going out without you? Lol. Some of us have very good memories, girl. Try again next time.
Loaded or whatever yu call yur sorryarse self, yu sure are loaded, loaded with shit, slime, grime, infact all the works that shit factory has to offer. All we want to know is how the husband going out thing plays out in different cultures, in this case, majorly naija, since na naija forum. Instead angel reloaded keeps loading us the shitworks. damned ass. makes the whole thing tiring. zero for value added. |
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kingdong (m)
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Still KO SI BIG DEAL if Leilah decides to wash her dirty pants in public!! wont be a bad idea to let the washed laundry dry over the heat from yur mouth hanging from yur head |
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Uche2nna (m)
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hey Uche!
Lauryn!!!!!! Where did You resurrect from ? Ol'girl You dey crase oooo!!! How come You just kep me in the dark ? You berra come online now because we get yarns |
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jamah (m)
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Loaded or whatever yu call yur sorryarse self, yu sure are loaded, loaded with shit, slime, grime, infact all the works that shit factory has to offer.
All we want to know is how the husband going out thing plays out in different cultures, in this case, majorly naija, since na naija forum. Instead angel reloaded keeps loading us the shitworks. damned ass. makes the whole thing tiring. zero for value added.
Thanks jare kingdong for helping me BLAST D-reloaded. Ahn Aaaaahn! i was wondering if there was something he knew about Leilah that i didnt. Leilah no-one hates You. At least, I don't. But hey, you too must agree that your story is gradually attaining legendary and folklore status on Nairaland. When You first came out with your marriage to one Nigerian, You really drew my sympathy. But as time went on ,. that gradually waned away. Cos it seems to me that You ACTUALLY DONT WANNA DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT. Thats ok by me as long as You don't go around singing it all around Nairaland threads. I really can't fathom how a man can treat You so bad and You endure it only to come to a public forum to cry wolf. You have always blamed your travails as a cultural thing ; Many ladies on Nairaland have told You that it is not true. your man is just a beast (sorry) but You seem to like your theory about culture better. It is far from our culture to have anal sex, matter of fact, that is more of an European thing than an African thing. Maybe I should ask if violence in marriage is a cultural thing for you. Cos it seems You are enjoying the violence that the guy is dishing out. Now You come out with going to parties/clubs without the wife? Not suprisingly, You want to attribute that to culture too (I wonder how much You know about this culture of ours ) . How can unfaithfulness be a cultural thing? Okaaaaaay, i get it. So this is Leilah's past post record on nairaland that warranted all that hatred. Anyways. All i have to say is that i agree with Xiomarra's commentssss pertaining to this issue. As long as the man knows what he is doing, keeping his home peaceful and happy. Then there is noooooo need to worry! SHIKENA! |
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fanistic (m)
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Serious issue.!
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4Her (f)
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The poster knew what she was doing when she posted this topic, so all of you open your eyes and activate your brain.
From abusing naija men to partying naija men. . . get to the point or STFU!
So men in Ireland dnt party without their wives? No, it does not have to do with culture. Sometimes, men just want to party like they once did, like bachelors. Just like any man, no woman wants her husband tagging along with her with every movement .
Why am I helping this Naija men sefshior hisssss
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Uche2nna (m)
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Helep me tell am , abeg. Cos e be like say I come get beef with the woman.
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TOH (f)
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Lolz. Looks like seun is a Leilah lover. Apparently he doesnt remember when I was the one that used to defend her Just this whole naive act of "omgosh, is this Nigerian culture" is not flying anymore. Tell me is wife beating an Irish culture? Cos that is what they known for after all. Get drunk, beat their wives and have kids with various woman. Maybe it was the Irish that taught Nigerians how to act like barbarians? |
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4Her (f)
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Helep me tell am , abeg. Cos e be like say I come get beef with the woman.
So Uche this is all I get? Nna nawa o  |
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lauryn (f)
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uche u no dey online o
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