LAFF YOUR ASS OFF WITH AYUS!!!

so fcukin what? Do u composssse urs? We all shoplift abi na Jokeslift from other site man! Now run away and don't be a kill joy,  Holyagbero!

@HolyAgbero, go look for more to C&P and stop spoiling business oo

Scavenger Hunt
A woman answered her front door and found two little boys standing there holding a list.

"Lady," one of them explained, "we're on a scavenger hunt, and we still need three grains of wheat, a pork-chop bone and a piece of used carbon paper to earn a dollar."

"Wow," the woman replied. "Who sent you on such a challenging scavenger hunt?"

To which the little boy replied, "Our babysitter's boyfriend."

Earring
A man is at work one day when he notices that his co-worker is wearing an earring.

This man knows his co-worker to be a somewhat conservative fellow, so naturally he's curious about the sudden change in fashion sense. The man walks up to his co-worker and says, "I didn't know you were into earrings."

"Don't make such a big deal, it's only an earring," he replies sheepishly.

"Well, I'm curious," begged the man, "how long have you been wearing an earring?"

"Ehr, ever since my wife found it in our bed."

Thanks sweetie. Nice pic u got in your profile Na gode!

A woman decides to have a face lift for her 50th birthday

She spends $15,000 and feels pretty good about the results.

On her way home, she stops at a news stand to buy a newspaper.

Before leaving, she says to the clerk, 'I hope you don't mind my
asking, but how old do you think I am?'

'About 32,' is the reply.

'Nope! I'm exactly 50,' the woman ! says ha happily.

A little while later she goes into McDonald's and asks the counter girl
the very same question.

The girl replies, 'I'D guess about 29.'

The woman replies with a big smile, 'Nope, I'm 50.'

Now she's feeling really good about herself. She stops in a drug store
on her way down the street. She goes up to the counter to get some
mints and asks the clerk this burning question.

The clerk responds, 'Oh, I'D say 30.'
Again she proudly responds, 'I'm 50, but thank you!'

While waiting for the bus to go home, she asks an old man waiting next
to her the same question.

He replies,'I'm 78 and my eyesight is going. Although, when I was
young, there was a sure-fire way to tell how old a woman was.

It sounds very forward, but it requires you to let me put my hands
under your bra. Then, and only then can I tell you EXACTLY how old you
are.'

They wait in silence on the empty street until her curiosity gets the
best of her. She finally blurts out, 'What the hell, go ahead.'

He slips both of his hands under her blouse and begins to feel around
very slowly and carefully. He bounces and weighs each breast and he
gently pinches each nipple. He pushes her breasts together and rubs
them against each other.

After a couple of minutes of this, she says, 'Okay, okay, How old am
I?'

He completes one last squeeze of her breasts, removes his hands, and
says, 'Madam, you are 50.'

Stunned and amazed, the woman says, 'That was incredible, how could you
tell?'

The old man says, 'Promise you won't get mad?'

'I promise I won't,' she says.

'I was behind you in McDonald's.'

Ayus u no go kill person with laff.
Allah ya bar mana kai!

gimme some more!

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Two Pigs
Two farmers were discussing politics and the first one says: "I believe in a share and share alike policy. One where we are all equal."

"Well" replied the other farmer "I'm not sure about that. What you mean is that if you have two horses you'D give me one?"

"Of course" says the first.

The second farmer continued: "and of you had two cars, you'D give me one of them too?"

"Absolutely"

"So" says the second farmer, "if you had two pigs then you'D give me one of them?"

"Ah, now hang on a minute" says the first, "you know I've got two pigs!"

Arriving Late
A certain professor arrived late for a lecture to find a most uncomplimentary drawing of himself on the blackboard.

Fuming, he asked the class joker in the front row, "Who, pray, was responsible for this atrocity?"

The joker won tremendous prestige with his reply, "I really don't know, but I strongly suspect its parents."

Ayus you are hot!!!

Math's Teacher: If you have

12 Chocolates and you



Give 5 to Aisha2,
3 to Lollabbey and
4 to Clemcy


Then what will u get?



.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.



.

.

Student: 3 New

Girlfriends

Mam!!!

O boy, fire down on all cylinders. I dey cover your back wella

Single-Minded
A man goes to a psychologist and says, "Doc I got a real problem, I can't stop thinking about relations."

The psychologist says, "Well let's see what we can find out", and pulls out his ink blots. "What is this a picture of?" he asks.

The man turns the picture upside down then turns it around and states, "That's a man and a woman having relations."

The psychologist says, "Very interesting," and shows the next picture. "And what is this a picture of?"

The man looks and turns it in different directions and says, "That's a man and a woman having relations."

The psychologists tries again with the third ink blot, and asks the same question, "What is this a picture of?"

The patient again turns it in all directions and replies, "That's a man and a woman having relations."

The psychologist states, "Well, yes, you do seem to be obsessed with relations."

"Me!?" demands the patient. "You're the one who keeps showing me the dirty pictures!"