Funny Experiences On Your First Trip To Naija After Being Abroad For A While

After being in the US for about two years, I travelled to Nigeria during the summer of 2005. I didn't think that I would have changed much, but I was in fact surprised to discover how much I had actually changed. Other than the seemingly unbearable heat which descended on my like a plague once I stepped out of the plane (as if I was not born and bred in Naija) two funny experiences stand out.

One morning, I went to a nearby store to try to buy some breakfast. I greeted the storekeeper and asked, "do you have any cereal?" The man looked at me a little strangely and I repeated the question "do you have any cereal?" Then his expression changed revealing a comprehending look, as though a light bulb had been turned up in his head. "Oh yes, we have cereal, what type do you want? Nutrend, SMA, Cerelac?" My younger brother who had accompanied me to the store burst out laughing. He then told me "bros. we no dey call am cereal for here, just ask him if he has cornflakes, or golden morn. Except you want to eat babyfood for breakfast." The poor storekeeper was aloof, asking my little brother, "why you dey laugh now?" I felt embarrassed for the man, and I must confess, a little embarrassed for myself too. I didn't realize how much I had changed!

The second experience was at tantalizers where I asked for a plate of rice and a side of doughnut. The girl serving looked strangely at me "what?" I almost repeated my self, "a side of, " and then realized that I was not in America. At that moment I found my Naija self and just asked for "rice and one doughnut, "

What were some of your funny experiences on returning home to Naija after so long? Did you try to wait for the traffic light to cross the road? Look for a dustbin to throw you trash in along the roadside? or try to get on a public bus but had lost your rushing skills?

Lets share 

@alarinjo, i can totally relate to the heat aspect. this one happened sometime in 2003. i went home sometime in february which is in the core of the winter. As i stepped out of the plane in nigeria, the type of heat that i felt literally felt like a sting. it covered my entire face like a seed weed. honestly at that point, i felt like sneaking back into the plane and returning to the states.

Damn, hotstepper, ure a cute babe! So are u really a hotstepper? Eastcoast, thats a nice painting. If its anything close to the way u really look, then, u only go to prove that naija girls are da bomb!

@Josboy, Exactly the same way I felt. Although I didnt come down with malaria because I was beefing up my system with anti-malaria meds.  When I will go back again? Hmm it all depends on money o. If Ican save enough I am thinking of this Christmas. But I agree with you, I don't want to be there during the elections or even shortly after it. I know things are going to be bloody. If I can't make it this christmas, I'll prolly go toward the end of 2007, what all did you do in Naija? Did you have any funny re-assimilation experiences?

Haha! So true, don't know about Canada, but in America u tend to get caught up in the habit of rolling ur r's can sound silly when conversing with other Naija's!

Hahaha, I can imagine. Sometimes I just drop the r's altogether, and tell my American friends to live with the British pronounciation. But most of the time, it is just contagious

Sounds hilarious. You never answered the question as to whether u are really a hotstepper, 

well at least u got the hot legs, thats the most important part 

That sucks. You should go see ur dermatologist to help u get rid of the mosquito scars. What part of the states where u going to visit?

interesting, make sure u come next time.

i am sees that alarinjo and hot steppers are scoped themselves, wats do naija ave to does with her names,  back to the topic, i ave no gone away from naija, but i knows if i leave, my english would be gooder, and i can blasted it for them sin my village

@ Moladun, don't you worry about your Englshes. Insfacts, the thickers your accents, the sexiers peeps will find yous.

My Uncle who has a German passport was to travel to Nigeria on short notice,due to the sudden death of his Father

He went to the Nigerian Embassy in Berlin but couldnt get a Visa for Nigeria,because the waiting list was too long
He decided to travel home without the Visa in order to attend the funeral

When he got to MMIA , the immigration officer asked where he was from and he replied that he was from Nigeria
this got the man(officer) mad, he told him u can't be a Nigerian because u carry a German Passport and u MUST have
a Visa to enter Naija, so my Unc pleads with this I'm Nigeria Bros and the next thing the Man says is that

"Look here u this Germanii if u don't take ur time I will Deport u back 2 Germany"

This Cracked up my Uncle!

anyway as per Nigeria 4 shizzle them settle the Deportation Wahala in Camera!

No, been back since, just didn't get on a bus!

If you have been out of Nigeria for a long time and come back to Nigeria, you would realise that the whole country looks either like a slum or a village. No offence but its the truth.

alarinjo you are funny how you go chop rice with donut on the side???