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Radiant (f)
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The boy steals, the boy steals, bla bla shit! What does he steal if I may ask?? I won't be surprised it's the same things y'all confessed you stole when you were small. Nonsense! If he steals and you can't teach him any better then send him back home. That's how to treat a "maid that steals". Too complicated indeed. I don't think my comment were directly referred to you@radiant. Look before you leap!
I was the first to mention the word "slave" so you could have also be referring to me. |
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lucabrasi (m)
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I'm not being dramatic in any way. These things happen in Nigeria. Is Lagos the whole Nigeria? Don't push it please.
they happen in nigeria,but lets be practical here,you don't seem to know how much they pay for houseboys/maids,any family that can afford an housemaid/boy wont be fetching water in streams and what not
In Nigeria they send even younger kids on errands such as washing cars, fetchin water, going to market. What are you talking about? You didn't grow in Nigeria? Rituals or no rituals, people abuse children in that country. What next street? Wake up!
c mmon now,how tall is an average 12 years old?maybe 4 ft/4ft plus?unless he s washing a ferrari or lambhorgini i don't think he ll be tall enough,rather he ll make a mess of the car he s trying to wash,fetching water is something all kids do irrespective of being a houseboy/girl or not,i totally agree with you that kids are abused but its not because some are house boys/maids ,its a general thing thats why i used myself as an example,in case you don't know the nija mind set,if a little boy or girl got lost or anything happended to them,even if you buy a car in 10 years time they will carry rumours that you v used the kid for money,thats why people are always careful to make sure they don't send kids on long errands,ask anybody. Sorry dear. I wasn't beaten tho' slapped a few times. I don't support beating. I was raised without whips and what not and yet I don't "knife" people. There are ways to raise children other than beating tho' I agree some children are terribly stubborn.
well i guess your parents were liberal,cause you are a single exception in like every ten kids,i don't support beatings as well and i also believe there are other ways to discipline kids,but some kids are really stubborn and the whip thing is a generational thing as my dad believes in the old school way of doing things,and you seem to have a picture of an innocent 12 years old who knows nothing,well newsflash,some are older than 12 and they coach and teach them to claim that age if they look it,they know much more than they let on because often times the bad ones have been in a lot of houses but they wont let on,as for returning them you pay their salaries in advance of maybe a year or 2 years,and then pay a hefty commission,you pay for their school,uniforms e.t.c which is non refundable,i don't know about other households but for my house every single house girl/boy will fight with anyone that tells them to leave and go back home even our driver's five children have all gone through university with the last girl in her final year,all put through by my dad, if you saw the man at his age(50s) being a driver you ll think he s been enslaved instead of retiring |
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Radiant (f)
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Luca, there are exceptions obviously. Not all house whatever are treated as mules but majority of them are.
Habaa! I grew up in Nigeria now. I saw for myself especially the "punishment" of putting pepper in a girls vagina or starving the person because he did Heaven knows what.
Now, if some parents are very harsh to their own kids like you say, you can only imagine what they do to these "maids".
Seriously, I've said my bit and I'm convinced that the poster of this thread needs a change of attitude towards that poor child.
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SoWhat77 (f)
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There is no excuse for employing a 12 year old CHILD. There are a few exceptions to a child entering into a contract for employment such as delivering papers, cutting grass, or washing a car. However in these situations the child would fullfill his duty collect his payment himself and return home to the parents or caregivers that love him and have his best interest at heart. This is far from that!
First of all the boy cannot be under contract for service because he was not the one deciding to perform the service. His parents or guardians were.
Second, if the boy was the one that entered into the contract with his own free will then why does he not receive the salary himself. If he was receiving pay for his services then he would have no need to steal!
Third, a person who is forced or coerced to perform a service in order for a third party to get some form of monetary gain is plain and simple A SLAVE!
If your mother does not feel that this type of arrangement is modern day child abuse and slavery then why doesn't she let him go and simply request that you "HELP" her yourself? If this work is not something two grown women can do themselves, than why on earth would you employ a 12 year old to do it.
This is utterly ridiculous! And no I am not being dramatic or a humanitarian. It doesn't take that kind of thinking to realize that this is wrong. You may have grown up in a society that thinks that this is OK but as human beings that grow, learn, and become wiser, you come to a point that you as a person, a individual, must realize right and wrong. And the fact that you will not do this work yourself yet hire a child to do it, tells me that you KNOW this is not right.
I think that under any economic situation it is shamefull for parents to hire out their children for money. ALL children need to be at home with the love, affection, and understanding of their parents. There is no excuse to send your children away to make money for the home. In fact isn't the child a part of the home? If you have sent them away then who is there to make money for? What is the struggle for if not for the family? Why doesn't the parent go and slave away for the child? Isn't this the way God intended family to be? Two adult parents that cannot find suitable employment for themselves but yet can find it for the child! Monstrous!
So no the poster and her mother are not the only ones to blame here. The main fault and blame lies with the parents and if the child did not go to the poster and her family then there will always be someone else willing and immoral enough to do it.With that said, [img][/img]I have often heard the saying "It takes a villiage to raise a child" but doesn't it also take a village to eradicate inhumane behavior?
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cute_N_hot (f)
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What are you lot talking about here?? If you have children in the house why can't they do the work or why can't you employ someone older?? You can't treat an older person with such humiliation of course. Bloody good samaritans!
Fine! The boy's parents probably don't have much and that's why they sent him out to "work". As a human being with blood in your vessels, will you now take advantage of the boys poverty and treat him anyhow just because you're "paying" him? You beat him as you like, you use such abusive words on him because he's a shock absorber? A child is a child no matter how big he may seem.
A child not treated well mentally suffers the effect then and even in his future. You guys can't be bothered about how he feels 'cause afterall he's being "payed" to be a mule.
Would you wake your child at 5am to go fetch water in some stream? will you tell your child not to sleep until you go to bed?? Will you deprive your child of food because he came back late from an errand??
Every child did some chores around the house, I agree. My parents made us do a few things but not major tasks like washin cars, sweepin the whole house etc. We had a house help who was way older than us and not a child like us.
Hello??
A 12 yr old is a flammin child and has to be treated like a child irrespective of the fact that you're doing him a bloody ass "favor".
If your child travelled to an Aunt's place and they treated him in a "horrible" way will you send him there again? I doubt it with every living cell in me.
The fact that "this is Nigeria" don't mean it's the right thing to do! If you want to help someone, do so without taking advantage of his situation and treat him like a mule all in the name of some stupid salary.
I have a 'son' in Nigeria. He's almost my age but go ask him the way I treat him.
Y'all stop taking advantage of people's misery. Nonsense!
If i were to say the above mentioned as posted by radiant, is the trappings of a backward society, i know i would surely be castigated. However coming from a Nigerian, there is no way that i cannot believe the validity of the comments. If the Comments are true, then there are indicative of a society that has yet to evolve from backwardness. Child labour, however disguised goes against the principles of human rights. A child has the right to be a child. |
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lucabrasi (m)
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@sowhat77,cute n hot
its all very well and good in theory,the human rights and bla bla, I'm guessing you are abroad can you volunteer to send these kids to school instead if they return back home or dyu have an alternative plan for them?seeing as the government doesnt and the parents certainly doesnt as well, no one is saying its good but the country is the way it is and unless you are saying hawking gala or pure water or sweets or canned soda is a better alternative because the kid gets to handle his own money, go under the bridge as see what kids even younger than 12 go through,i met some of these ethiopian kids and nigerian kids when i was on holidays because they r normally by the main road where i buy the dailies everyday,and i got talking to them later when the females left and the 2 little boys started joking n talking with me,they told me these girls not more than 10 years old gets raped by the disabled men who live with them under the bridge and somedo it willingly for the 200naira or 300 naira,ill tell u exactly where they are in ikeja lagos if u don't blieve
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Radiant (f)
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Luca, what's your point now?
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janami (f)
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@ Gamine Hi dear.i ve bin busy. just looked through the post. Like u said, sending him packing wont do the trick, teaching him would. My mum has been talking to him ever since. Since she was a teacher, she knows the drill well. She says she prefers to reform him than to send him packing just like that. monitoring him is a good suggestion @Davidylan  how i know say u go reach here? tut tut @Ndipe na so we see am o. @Luca u r right. they all lie about their age. they r just short. Even his mom says he is older than d 12 we think he is, and come to think of it, at 12, i know what i was doing at home. i wasnt considered a kid anymore. @all child abuse? na wa o. una for see d person wey una dey call "child". Anyway, we are not putting him under any illusion of taking him to school, i cannot count how many people my mom has trained to graduate level. We give them an option of formal education or learning a trade. Most jump at learning trades. As for maltreating, he will tell u himself that he has a better life here. hasty and incorrect conclusions wont give me the ansa i need. |
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janami (f)
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@radiant
what exactly is your point? do u side to stealing?
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Radiant (f)
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Miss helper, has that poor child eaten today? @radiant
what exactly is your point? do u side to stealing?
If he steals and you can't teach him any better then send him back home. That's how to treat a "maid that steals".
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Gamine (f)
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Jan, How is work?  There are issues you shouldnt even break a sweat over. Anyways, Its nice to know that things are moving up. its all good.
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janami (f)
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@gamine i am good dear. Thinkn of going back to school. life hasnt eva been beta @Radiant. Miss maid activist, wont u just jump at the idea of having a maid  ? Try to be true to yourself and stop jumping to hasty judgements u talk about civilization and child abuse but u ve not shown any cicilization in answering me whatsoever. Anyway, if u dnt have anything good to say but try to poke at trouble, just keep quiet |
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Radiant (f)
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@Radiant. Miss maid activist, wont u just jump at the idea of having a maid ? Try to be true to yourself and stop jumping to hasty judgements u talk about civilization and child abuse but u ve not shown any cicilization in answering me whatsoever. Anyway, if u dnt have anything good to say but try to poke at trouble, just keep quiet I have every good thing to say on this matter. Any sane person wouldn't hire a 12 yr old kid as maid. If this isn't abnormal to you then I wonder what else you want me to tell you. I think you're the one who needs to stfu and go do the right thing. |
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janami (f)
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so my mum is doing an abnormal thing? u sure are a foolish one. anyway, i have no reason to trade words with u, just get out of my thread, u r not welcome here. i have better people with more sane suggestions to listen to
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lucabrasi (m)
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Luca, what's your point now?
my point isnt any diffrent from what i v been on about all along,in a country where there is no social welfare,poverty e.t.c parents who get their children in homes as houseboys/maids count themselves lucky because contrary to what you been saying ,the alternatives to being a housemaid/boy is far worse for them check my last comment to sowhat77$cute n hot which is just a tip the iceberg of what kids on the street go through |
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Gamine (f)
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Jan, going back to which school, CU?  ? hen! Me I'm going to school next year, I'm working now
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janami (f)
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lol. No oh. CU ke? i no fit stay dia again o Those in my set still in cu are lecturing now. I no fit sign that contract o . Not workin yet though i am thnkn school this year sha |
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Radiant (f)
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so my mum is doing an abnormal thing? u sure are a foolish one. anyway, i have no reason to trade words with u, just get out of my thread, you're not welcome here. i have better people with more sane suggestions to listen to
The fact that a woman happens to be your mother don't mean she has/is/will always do the right thing. Sad you didn't know that. How much did you pay to start this thread? Don't let me tell the living life off you. |
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Radiant (f)
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my point isnt any diffrent from what i v been on about all along,in a country where there is no social welfare,poverty e.t.c parents who get their children in homes as houseboys/maids count themselves lucky because contrary to what you been saying ,the alternatives to being a housemaid/boy is far worse for them check my last comment to sowhat77$cute n hot which is just a tip the iceberg of what kids on the street go through
Guess we're both saying the same thing tho' you seem to regard some form of abuse higher than the other. It's all child abuse regardless of the degree of abuse and the reason for it. |
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janami (f)
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beta watch it. ur reply shows ur rudeness. i play with some things but i dnt play wit my mother or take any stupid comments from outsiders about her. so watch it tell d living wetin? lol, u too small for my side o  besides, the boy is here grinning away with his overstuffed belly of food, did i hear him complaining to you or do u hear him crying to u at night? i strted d thread for worthwhile suggestions, not nutty ones |
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Radiant (f)
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beta watch it. your reply shows your rudeness. i play with some things but i dnt play wit my mother or take any stupid comments from outsiders about her. so watch it tell d living wetin? lol, u too small for my side o besides, the boy is here grinning away with his overstuffed belly of food, did i hear him complaining to you or do u hear him crying to u at night? i strted d thread for worthwhile suggestions, not nutty ones There are many words to describe the truth including "rude". I understand that. Ain't taking no letter of my words back. You were the one who told us how you've beaten the boy to the extent that your hands hurt. You can't edit that now 'cause we've all seen it. So please, do feed him so that he'll have energy to endure your beatings. Useless thing. |
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rubi (f)
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There are many words to describe the truth including "rude". I understand that. Ain't taking no letter of my words back.
You were the one who told us how you've beaten the boy to the extent that your hands hurt. You can't edit that now 'cause we've all seen it. So please, do feed him so that he'll have energy to endure your beatings. Useless thing.
I can't stop laughung |
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janami (f)
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hehehehehe. edit kini? i dnt giv 2 wot anyone thinks about me.lol. i no get follow follow attitude like u.  if i beat him and my hand is paining me shld tell u i am not used to beating people. block head . have u been hearing him crying in your dream again? lol. u can feed him more if it is biting u so much Rude, truth?your truth is not truth at all, you're just assuming and screaming. how strongly can u back your truth? u freely tell a 19yr old girl who is probably still in school to hv sex if she wants and you're here ranting about child abuse, abegi, make we hear word. |
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janami (f)
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I can't stop laughung
e be like say u sef don dey hear the boy dey cry for night  |
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Radiant (f)
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Rude, truth?your truth is not truth at all, you're just assuming and screaming. how strongly can u back your truth? u freely tell a 19yr old girl who is probably still in school to hv sex if she wants and you're here ranting about child abuse, abegi, make we hear word. I can "back" my truth with all you've told us. All I've said here was based on what you told us. Guess you were expecting a pat on the back but it hit u right in the face. Last I checked, the legal age for sex in almost all countries was 16-18. Some 14. Bet you're clueless. Is that the topic now? Bring it on you looser  |
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rubi (f)
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e be like say u sef don dey hear the boy dey cry for night I have never heard him cry for night but I could feel his pain |
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janami (f)
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can u read? nuttin in my post suggets the boy is being maltreated, but i guess u ve been hearing noises u assume is the boy crying? well there is yaba left for that, dnt start dara - ing here.
tell a 19 yr old girl to lose her virginity freely if she wants or hire a maid, pay, feed, give shelter, clothe and an education, which one is child abuse? oga o.
the legal age to you is from 16, the moral age is not from 16, get that.
seeing that i have a life outside of nairaland that u clearly dnt have . . . . . i gotsa do smtg more imptt . . . . bring it on? u even still talk like a high schooler. lol
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janami (f)
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@rubi feel a stranger's pain . . . . strange |
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rubi (f)
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@rubi feel a stranger's pain . . . . strange I feel his pain based on the post I don't have to see him we communicate on the internet |
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Radiant (f)
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can u read? nuttin in my post suggets the boy is being maltreated, but i guess u ve been hearing noises u assume is the boy crying? well there is yaba left for that, dnt start dara - ing here.
tell a 19 yr old girl to lose her virginity freely if she wants or hire a maid, pay, feed, give shelter, clothe and an education, which one is child abuse? oga o.
the legal age to you is from 16, the moral age is not from 16, get that.
seeing that i have a life outside of nairaland that u clearly dnt have . . . . . i gotsa do smtg more imptt . . . . bring it on? u even still talk like a high schooler. lol
Lol. . . you're talking about moral age. There's no specific moral age, it just depends on the person. If my child at 19 wishes to loose her virginity by all means I'll give her all the advice in this world to protect her from diseases and unwanted pregnancies. I can't stop her 'cause she might end up doing it at my back. Morally speaking, 19 is not a bad age. What's your take on it? 25? Morally speaking again, in Nigeria some people like you think beating is the best way to "deal with a little thief" but legally you'll be in for it. What are you trying to tell me here? You trying to cover up your shame? You should even be more ashamed trying to do that. Get lost abeg! |
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janami (f)
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look, u also have a case of child abuse. stop making noise. who says a boy of 12 can't do chores morally speaking [s][/s]?  no one can be as lazy as u. get lost u said? you're in my thread, i should fleet u out. pests and rodents arent allowed to be with people |
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