Just Me And Me

HAPPY DIWALI 

diwali ko, diwalu nii,

bunch of  !!!

I think HE reads this now,

nice one!!!

nothing new i suppose? 

or is there???

nothing too interesting these days, only the fact that i have "murdered sleep" the day i remembered that i have less than 7 weeks for my exams and now "i sleep no more". In fact i wake up before the alarm rings these days, but you really need to pity me O, i can go for 2 hours of reading in the night non-stop but i realized at the end of it all that ave not read more than 45 mins. i think that is really pitiable and sad.  my mind wanders a lot, but i promise you all shall be well.

OBAMERICA, another great issue, can i even figure what am proud of? maybe am just envying the guy's wife sef. i really daydreamt the day he won O, how sweet if it was me and HIM and our two "precious kids". 

whatever sha, am still a bible believer, "rejoice with those that rejoice".

I dey sha

 

Atimes one does not know how much looks can betray the heart. I am not too good at doing that though i.e. hiding one from the other. Never knew how much i have "grown old" _{in their words} till my colleagues interrogated me this morning. I almost bursted right infront of them. I think I am weighing myself down, no doubt about that, but what am a little uncomfortable with is the fact that it is written all over my face. I just never realized it O. But whatever is troubling my heart is not for this forum. I will share it anyways after am over it. 

As i post this now, one of my colleagues just walked past me and because there is a smile of my face, he said "please Baby this is way i want it to be, permanently, because ave missed it" _{is it that bad?} 

Some beautiful calls woke me up this morning, and of course i had to reply the calls later to thank them.

According to Sunny Ade's song "eniyan o dara ju aso lo, eniyan laso iyi mi ti mo fi nbora". Just telling how much acquintance meant to his life.  and mine too. 

Office gossips, hehehehehehehehe

i no fit laff O.

anyways, na here we go dey sha.

Office doesnt smell well these days, my boss is quite touchy, am being made to pay for a document that am sure was not misplaced by me.

I dey here dey look O.

3 weddings on a Saturday and Aladunni will not attend any. God will forgive me and peeps will not consider my deeds on my own Day.

I was updated that one of the grooms was late for engagement this morning. Marriage fever dey catch am?    hehehehehehehehe i go die O.

I know my perception about OWAMBEs may change one day. Maybe when i have a car, at least things would be done at my convenience.

MIL, FIL, and SIL are all in town for one of the weddings. I wished to just sneak in there to say hi, but HE refused me and of course, trust and obey 

Praise doing fine in the UK, not likely to come to naija again. We had to agree on some prayer points yesterday, we seemed to flock alike these days. Its good to be kept warm by a christian companion.

I feel h***y these days, i think its the time of the month. It will soon go i guess, it always comes and goes. I know one day soon, i will have every right to satisfy all NEEDS without guilt or fear.

Exams is right at my toes i can't afford to talk too much

HAPPY MARRIED LIFE TO YOU ALL

You sef go dey na 

Na real wa

KillJoy eventually traveled but not without picking an offence with moi, and when he gets to Dubai now, the first thing is to logg on and start jisting what does not concern me as far as am concerned. Anyways thank Jehovah he even traveled in the first place at least i can breath a shouting-free air after a few weeks.

Etsa is so heavy now, i think her term is so near, yet maid is going on xmas hols, you can just guess that i will soon become a mini-maid. 

One wonderful woman ave known as VIRTUOUS is marking her birthday on Saturday, went to a plaza to price a bottle of Champagne yesterday, i just weak, is it not better to buy a wrapper for the woman sef?

Saw an old friend yesterday, ha! the last person on my mind, he saw me first and i was really happy to see his present state of affairs, a beautiful wife, a nice car, good job, big boy now faa. Its nice meeting such peeps once in a while sha.

Office is fine, everyone is minding his/her business now, as my boss had been intimidating virtually the whole office.

What is the meaning of NO CEREMONY? 

i go dey sha

haaaaaaaaaaaa _(yawns) Ow una dey na? 

Anyways, am happy to miss thou. Have you checked my signature of late? You can contact us anytime, anyday, we are the best and the cheapest you can find around. Do not miss the opportunity of being original and not being cheated in any way. _{Author: US} 

I know there is no sacred crow in this world neither is there any on nairaland. If you are big-mouthed and sensi-less in your own thought, you will have a terrible crash even your ego wont help you. Well, sorry G, it is one of those things, learn!!! or you will kill yourself with this same HARDITTUDE in your dream husband's house.

Date fixed, and still am so blank. I wonder why? Nobody seems to be able to help me outta this. Jehovah will. 

Papa is a lil ill, called to know how well he is now. Etsa has put to bed O, nice looking baby-guy. We dey O.

I am tired of this city, its not a new thing abi. It shall be well. Met a friend yesterday and alas, he just lost his precious mum, sad indeed. Office is doing good, at least killjoy is not around, we get all instructions over the sea now. I need to tidy my office now, my days are quite numbered on this seat. I actually need to plan what to do when i get to my new location.I cannot afford to be idle for one single day, HE is the only object of interest to me in that city as far as am concerned. We go dey sha

A lady just called me now from Galleria, am not sure i know what i want sef. and come to talk of it there is 20% price slash O.

Talking about gowns, a friend called me 2 weeks ago and said she is broke and wanted to sell the gown and she is being offered a ridiculous price. Now I wonder what the expensive ones are actually meant for. Am not sure of what i want to do again O. I will before this week runs out.

Party, party, party??? What is it with peeps and parties? I dont geddit anymore, and now it has become real stress in the office, na by dandan to do xmas party and besides this is an event that had not been considered for 5 good years. And now it becomes a do or die affair in less than a week. KillJoy is very generous to approve it too, but i know that it is film trick, and he knows too, but the disorganizing committee did not know till 2 days ago. Double-mouthed "communittee" members, i really tire for these people sef. What is it about partying??? I cannot just afford to involve myself in all that mess, i will not.  and i know we have not heard the last of this cancelled mowambe.

Anyways we dey,

HE and his undecided trip had been cancelled again. I no fit laff faa, for years, this trip had been like this and i actually suggested we make it together after "i do" but   

Everyone is going to the village, me sef no go go village so??? I dey, nofing do me 

Time and Chance.

I may not be time conscious but I am a good planner and I hate fire-brigade approach to issues. Although one of my weaknesses is the speed at which I can change my mind at quarter-to-go, I dont like that either but its something ave noticed about moi. Well, well, well talking about time, i have a small calculation of numbers to make again today. Let us do this together

2008 = 1

1 = 12 = 52 = 366 = 8784 = 5,270,040 = 31,622,400

we will use per hour billing as our standard measurement.

i.e. number of hours of activities subtracted from 8784 (total hours)

Now there is an ALMIGHTY SUSTAINER of these numbers, He has the power over the numbers and can either cut it short or elongate it whichever way he deems fit. It does not depend on what you do or how you impress him before he knows what to do with your numbers. _{that is what No God peeps are fighting}.

Anyways, ave been asking myself this question since two days now, how much of this numbers ave i devoted for this controller of numbers? 

Am so sure He Loves me and I cannot say why. I am happy for many things and its because He made it so.

But ave i paid back? Can i even pay back? If I cant pay back, ave i been grateful with my life? How many times ave i caused him to frown over my lifestyle? Was i sorry and sober? He blessed me, did i bless others? Will He be ready to grant me more numbers on this earth because i am fulfilling purpose or He will give me more numbers because he is tolerating me? Had my life shown him that am worth keeping? When in his power decide to add more numbers, how do i use it in order to present a balanced sheet at the end of the time? More questions than answers.

2009 is coming with its own uniqueness but one thing is constant NUMBERS. it will soon roll in and we will be on the go as per how far the numbers will be utilized.

God Bless My Soul

Words
Author: Unknown


A certain good woman one day said something that hurt her best friend of many years.  She regretted it immediately, and would have done anything to take the words back.  But they were said, impulsively, in a moment of thoughtlessness, and as close as she and her friend were, she didn't consider the effects of her words before hand.  What she said hurt the friend so much that this good woman was herself hurt for the pain she caused.



In her effort to undo what she had done, she went to an older, wiser woman in the village.  Explaining her situation, and asked for advice.  The older woman listened patiently in an effort to determine just how sincere the younger woman was, how far she was willing to go to correct the situation.



She explained that sometimes, in order put things back in order, great efforts must be made.  She then asked: "Just what would you be willing to do, to repair the harm done?"  The answer was heartfelt, "Anything."  Listening to her, the older woman, sensed the younger woman's distress, and knew she must help her.



She also knew she could never alleviate her pain by living her life for her, but she could teach, if the younger woman would first listen, and then learn.  She knew the outcome would depend solely on the character of the younger woman.



She said, "There are two things needed to do to make amends.  The first of the two is extremely difficult.  Tonight, take your best feather pillows, and open a small hole in each one.  Then, before the sun rises, you must put a single feather on the doorstep of each house in town.  When you are through, come back to me.  If you've done the first thing completely, I'll tell you the second."



The young woman hurried home to prepare for her chore, even though the pillows were very dear to her, very expensive.  All night long she labored alone in the cold. She went from doorstep to doorstep, taking care not to overlook a single house.  Her fingers were frozen, the wind was so sharp it caused her eyes to water, but she ran on, through the darkened streets, thankful there was something she could do to put things back the way they once were.  Finally, as the sky was getting light, she placed the last feather on the steps of the last house.



Just as the sun rose, she returned to the older woman. She was exhausted, but relieved that her efforts would be rewarded.  "My pillows are empty.  I placed a feather on the doorstep of each home."



Now, said the wise woman, "Go back and refill your pillows. Then everything will be as it was before."



The young woman was stunned.  "You know that's impossible!  The wind blew away each feather as fast as I placed them on the doorsteps!  You didn't say I had to get them back!  If this is the second requirement, then things will never be the same."



"That's true", said the older woman.



"Never forget.  Each of your words is like a feather in the wind.  Once spoken, no amount of effort, regardless how heartfelt or sincere, can ever return them to our mouth. Choose your words well, and guard them most of all in the presence of those you love."

Have you ever wondered which hurts most? Saying something and wishing you had not, or saying nothing and wishing you had?


Have you ever noticed that the worst way to miss someone is when they are right beside you and yet you can never have them,   or when the moment you can't feel them under your fingertips, you miss them?



I guess the most important things are the hardest things to say.
They are the things you get ashamed of because words diminish them, words shrink things that seemed timeless when they are in your head, to no more than living size when they are brought out,



Don't be afraid to tell someone you love them. If you do, they might break your heart,   But if you don't, you might break theirs. Have you ever decided not to become a couple because you were so afraid of losing what you already had with that person?



Your heart decides who it likes and who it doesn't. You can't tell your heart what to do. It does it on its own,  When you least suspect it, or even when you don't want it to.



Have you ever wanted to love someone with everything you had, but that person was too afraid to let you?



Have you ever loved someone with all your heart and soul, but were too afraid of being rejected, to tell them how you really felt?



Too many of us stay walled because we are too afraid to care too much, or at all.



Have you ever loved someone and they had absolutely no idea whatsoever?



Or fell for your best friend in the entire world, and then sat around and watched him/her fall for someone else? Have you ever denied your feelings for someone
because your fear of rejection was too hard to handle?


We tell lies when we are afraid. Afraid of what we don't know, afraid of what others will think, afraid of what will be found out about us.


But every time we tell a lie,  the things we fear grow stronger. Life is all about risks and it requires you to jump. Don't be a person who has to look back and wonder what they would have, or could have had. No one waits forever,


When one of the partners leaves the other, look at this parting as a gift. By leaving, you return the gift of freedom to choose a higher love, higher and richer experiences with someone else, who will take this partner’s hand to continue the journey upwards.

Those who have left have left because they have nothing more to share. Their purpose in the life of the other was over. Their guidance was no longer needed; it was the time to move on.

Both good and bad experiences are learning experiences. For a reason, for an awakening,  The key is in how we perceive things, we always have a choice.

So why not choose love and light instead of fear and pain?

This, my friend, is the whole core of all the many words we have shared over time.  Also the core of the one I am sending to you. This is the magic of words. We duel with words. We hide behind words. We play with words. We love, we cry, we pain. We need words.

We wrap words around what we really want to say. In the end one can always sum up what is said in a few powerful words and sentences.  You must just have the wisdom to look deep enough. You must have the eyes to look where other people do not see. You must be able to hear what is not said.

I do believe that there is a connection between some people. A beautiful thread that was woven in us and through us, making us part of a picture even before we were born. But some how, some people like you and me are just connected.

I dey

na asebi dey reign now O, i dont know which one sef. Is it aso-ebi or asebi? 

anyways we dey sha, one of the most popular wedding gown outfits around just fucked me up. sold my gown after 85% down payment. 

its too bad to be real, haba. where is integrity nah? I can see it is totally lost here, she was actually looking so real until last weekend, and before you speak I AM MRS OK*K* wat is all this na? Well i told her i wont stop calling till two weeks wen another gown will be delivered, i hope i am not fooling maself. We dey sha

I am becoming stressed up this days. I now know weddings is all about pepper O, if pepper rest you will go and sleep soundly sef.

anyways i dey sha, i no dey run

Brad??? no way! ave never been this torn in my heart for over a year now. God I need you to stand my ground.   

adjusting is not an easy job but i feel its adventurous 

-  waking up to see someone in your bed everyday.

- having to share so many things in common.

- having dinner ready before HE comes back or at least something to eat

- doing mene mene without fear nor guilt.

I am loving it and loving it and loving it. I promise to enjoy it while it lasts. Haha na so he jus happen like joke like joke, one year ago. He resting right here now and it looks more like a dream. 


less nairaland these days i know. at least i will try to keep this journal going.

see ya, catcha, lerra. 

na real wa, so i could be this distance from updating this journal. I get it nw, its either priority is shifted or too much work to do. I think its the latter.

Anyways am good, with a new job and new set of challenges, too.

am really enjoying the sex part too, its real fun and i can authoritately say that when sex is done rightly, it brings more closeness and trust. I thank God for waiting to do it correctly.

better days ahead readers. i will always keep thou posted.

First day posting from my mobile. Been making my hair for more than 4 hrs now, female and looking nice troubles. Brad called! When will dis man forget about moi?  How hard could that be for him? Happier than i could ever be wit my husband o.