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KarmaMod (f)
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even if "as they come" is the exact opposite of what you wnat in a partner?
Good luck with that.
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Studentet
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Karmamod,
if it does happen to you, will you rush out?
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davidylan (m)
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even if "as they come" is the exact opposite of what you wnat in a partner?
Good luck with that.
lol definitely not. There are basic things you expect from your partner . . . beyond that you just have to learn to adjust to the other minute issues she brings to the relationship. If you're looking for a clone of your father maybe i shld suggest u just marry him because you wont find any.
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KarmaMod (f)
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Never said I was looking for a clone. Like any human, he has good and "bad" sides.
But when it comes to NOT RELYING ON A WOMEN TO DO EVERYTHING FOR YOU, that's one majority stance I'm not weavering on. It's what I was raised up with, what I've come to appreciate and what I WANT
is that ok for you?
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KarmaMod (f)
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Karmamod,
if it does happen to you, will you rush out?
What is "it"?
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Negro_Ntns (m)
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lol@post The rhythm of relationship and interaction between two people is a dynamic one, it is never at static state. So there is no fast rule by which a man will relate to all women in each of his relationships. He might be kind and compassionate in his relationship with Ms A and willing to rotate roles with her, but then he meets Ms B and he is carefree and unconcerned about her emotions and he is hardly around to assist her, then he meets Ms C and the dynamic of that interaction could swing him to the extreme end where he acts brute and cruel to her and make her serve him like a maid. Of course in a marriage, the rhythm, whatever it is, has had time to settle and what you observe is a constancy of expression. If it is the Ms A type, then it will be shocking to suddenly see the man swing and start behaving towards his wife in the Ms C type. Wassup with all these men vs women, "who is stronger, who is weaker" stuffs??? 
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Ruby_Pearl (f)
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see this man. must he write a valedictorian speech on everything?
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KarmaMod (f)
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At least he makes sense as opposed to those who don't make "speeches"
"My papa didnt even cry when his parents died, he's THE MAN"
Utter idiocy.
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davidylan (m)
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Never said I was looking for a clone. Like any human, he has good and "bad" sides.
But when it comes to NOT RELYING ON A WOMEN TO DO EVERYTHING FOR YOU, that's one majority stance I'm not weavering on. It's what I was raised up with, what I appreciate and what I WANT
is that ok for you?
Its ok, i'm just saying not to assume that your dad shld be the model for the ideal man. The good thing is you at least have an idea of what you want your man to be so the rest of your search is made easy.
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Uche2nna (m)
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Wassup with all these men vs women, "who is stronger, who is weaker" stuffs???  Beats me  People treat life like a linear graph. If X equals this , then Y must be equal to that. Truth is that in life it is different strokes for different folks.
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Ruby_Pearl (f)
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He might be kind and compassionate in his relationship with Ms A and willing to rotate roles with her, but then he meets Ms B and he is carefree and unconcerned about her emotions and he is hardly around to assist her, then he meets Ms C and the dynamic of that interaction could swing him to the extreme end where he acts brute and cruel to her and make her serve him like a maid. You lost me at "Ms A". 
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HCH3COO
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Beats me  People treat life like a linear graph. If X equals this , then Y must be equal to that. Truth is that in life it is different strokes for different folks. like a y = 100 graph where y represents the man's authority (on a scale with a range of 100) over his wife 
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KarmaMod (f)
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Its ok, i'm just saying not to assume that your dad shld be the model for the ideal man. The good thing is you at least have an idea of what you want your man to be so the rest of your search is made easy.
Not "model" of course, I definitely perfer someone with a better temper. He passed on his ridiculously hot temper to me. I blame him!  but I do love how he treats my mother and it's the little things like not putting a burden on her because she's the "wife"/treating her like a second class citizen that I'm hoping for in mine. 
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HCH3COO
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You lost me at "Ms A".  Uhh I guess I'll help you out, whatever. negro is saying the man's personality/mood will change relative to the type of person he's with at a given time.
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davidylan (m)
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Not "model" of course, I definitely perfer someone with a better temper. He passed on his ridiculously hot temper to me. I blame him!  but I do love how he treats my mother and it's the little things like not putting a burden on her because she's the "wife"/treating her like a second class citizen that I'm hoping for in mine.  i get your point, but you will have to learn to adjust your "needs" depending on the man you end up with. If we could design our own ideal man none of us would be on this thread. 
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KarmaMod (f)
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abi he should adjust his own wiring to be at least 80% my dream dude 
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HCH3COO
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abi he should adjust his own wiring to be at least 80% my dream dude  your idea of matriarchy?
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Ruby_Pearl (f)
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negro is saying the man's personality/mood will change relative to the type of person he's with at a given time. ohhhhhh, thanks. Do you agree with him, because I don't. *grabs face* I seriously don't know what I woulda done without your help.
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HCH3COO
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blah blah blah. yes i agree with him.
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Ruby_Pearl (f)
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something is eating you up. And seriously, I care not to know  Men and their manners. hiss
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Ruby_Pearl (f)
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you snake Have I bitten you? My venom in your veins?
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HCH3COO
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okay sorry to bother you.
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Ruby_Pearl (f)
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*sigh* You're trying to make me feel guilty about sth. spill it out 
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HCH3COO
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nothing. can't make you feel anymore guilty than myself, i no go worry you again.
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nalijah07 (f)
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@ davidylan - Yes, you are right. All fathers are different - There is no right or wrong.
@sistawoman - I think your parents have it right. They are not doing these things because it is expected of them, just because of the respect and love they have for each other. Each relationship has "their thing" that makes it special.
I also believe the man should take the lead role in the relationship. I totally agree that if mom is not happy, the whole household will suffer.
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dadahgirl
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First of all, a man that cries does not make him less of a man.
In my opinion some of the things that make a real man are: the ability to make decisions, act mature and be responsible, to name a few.
I like a man that can take can be a strong leader and at the same time consult with me. This makes me feel apart of the relationship and not a little girl who is taken from the hand. I am in the relationship with him and I want to have a say as well.
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