|
inspired_m (m)
|
“IT’S absolutely impossible to know a woman totally, no matter how hard you try.” These were the exact words of one of my friends when his relationship with his girlfriend went sour. He went on and on telling me how he tried to please her, give her everything she needed and wanted. He felt his world was shattered, that he wouldn’t be able to pick the pieces of his life again after the “horrible thing” that has happened to him.
In another development entirely, a young ladyfriend recently confessed that men could be jerks. She said after the relationship with her ex-boyfriend hit the rocks, he went everywhere he knew and blackmailed her. She said, he reported bad things about her to whoever was willing to listen.
With these two stories and so many more that I’ve been opportuned to hear, what I think is seriously lacking is self identity. Many a times, we look for something that will complement us in relationships, jobs, fashion, etc. But the fact lies in knowing and understanding ourselves first. Like fashion experts will tell us, first know what suits us best before you buy them. Job experts will tell us to find the job that gets us fulfilled and the relationship experts will tell us to get a man or woman of our dreams.
Like someone would say, “many of us are having problems with our relationships because we go into a relationship with the wrong people in the first place. Most of the time, to some of us, it’s as if we are putting a square peg in a round hole.” Some will identify with this person, while others will not. But what experts lay emphasis upon, over and over again, is that each individual should know himself/herself first before going into a relationship. It is believed that you cannot give what you don’t have. For instance, if you don’t love yourself, chances are that you will not love another person.
You give a certain degree of what you have. Likewise, you operate on the certain level of information you have about yourself, or something, to perform a project. Since every project you undertake has a direct or indirect impact on your life, it is recommendable that you have full information about such a project and how to accomplish it before you start off. This is why it is very important before you start a relationship, or even if you are already into it, to know who you are, be friends with yourself first and ultimately love yourself.
|
![Nairaland [Nigerian Forum] Home](http://www.nairaland.com/Themes/default/images/english/home.gif)
Author
