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reindeer
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dear Chris
thanks for your question, i was never 'against' christianty, nope, as far i was concerned people were free to believe whatever it is they choose to believe, i decided that all the religions i have come in contact with do not exactly answer my questions about the person of 'God', at a stage i believed he was a creation of humans to explain things they don't fully understand yet etc. Despite all these there was this little tug at the back of my mind that somewhere out there was a higher power that i just couldnt seem to reach. It was frustrating, it was disturbing/unsettling. there was this constant heaviness on my heart.
Make no mistake, i wasnt such a bad person, i believed in the live and let live principle, if you are expecting the story of a murderer turned christian, sorry u wont get that here.
this i think is why i found myself scouring through the religion pages, for someone who didnt give two hoots about jesus, wasnt it strange that i kept coming back to these pages?something kept me coming even when i saw that both christians and muslims had such tempers that i was even disgusted at a stage.
what changed for me? Id say its the state of my heart, theres a calm now since i said those words of prayer,theres this silent contentment, an ever present reassurance.Its as if all of a sudden i have no cares anymore,as if all my questions had been answered(but hey, some,infact most of them are still there!) but somehow they just seem not to matter anymore, instead I'm happy, filled with joy( you know the kind of joy you had as a kid when you know you have a special outing the next day and you couldnt wait for daylight), I'm.,just joyful!! All these came in just because for once i opened my heart and allowed him in. Chris, words can't really describe the feeling,its just heavenly. now i know why people get addicted to drugs because they got a 'high'.Now this is much more intense I'm sure and you don't have to go buying, just allow him in. I think he may be tugging at the door of your heart right now, please don't stall anymore, allow him in and experience the love, warmth and peace. You'll feel so good you are going to want to tell the whole world.
so my hair is still the same, i still wear the same clothes but now i sing a different tune and my heart is changed all because of love. take care bro. jesus is lord!!!
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