Nollywood: Don't We Need A Revolution?

Some Questions to think about . . . Remember THIS IS STRICTLY FOR NOLLYWOOD MOVIES.

1) In movies you really like, what do you think was most important?
 
The script
 Who does the movie star?
 The characters
 The plot/storyline
 Special effects
 Music/songs
 Visuals (does it look good on the big screen?)
 Action
 Romance
 Suspense
 Actually feeling the characters' emotions


2) What do you think spoils movies most?
 A bad script
 Irritating characters
 Poor storyline
 Themes that have been done too many times
 If it's too long or slow
 If it's too short
 Noticeable mistakes (continuity, seeing cameras when you shouldn't, etc)
 Having to yell `Just kiss him/her!'
 Overplayed action/romance scenes
 A stupid or radical ending
 Being based extremely loosely on a book
 Being too predictable
 Being too radical

3) Have you stopped watching a movie before the end of it?
 Yes
 No

4) What is your opinion on movie sequels?
 Every movie should have a sequel!
 Some sequels are good
 No, any sequel is rarely as good as the original
 Can nobody think of something original?

Will be awaiting your responses, until then. . . Party on!!!

Excuse me ma, can we give more than one answer to a question?

Yeah, Just call me the official Pep Squad for the Nollywood Revolution Party. . . okay, why does that sound like a terrorist group or is it just me?

And I know I've opened us up to the "But you are a terrorist. . . against Nollywood group" jokes and responses.

Whatevah!!

Go Team Go

Speaking of go. . .

Ok. Lets see shall we?


A: The scripts. This seems to be an all important factor. No one would go and see a movie with Brad Pitt on a river of gravy being stirred but a q-tip. The script and dialogue is important if it wants to be watched!

The plot/storyline. This includes continuity does it not? Remember my story about Brad and the gravy boat?

The suspense.
 
And the actual feel of the characters' emotions.

It doesn't really matter who stars in the movie as long as the person can make an attempt to ACT!!! notice the key word being "act" Notice that did you?
There have been hugely successful movies that didn't have out of this world special effects. Tsotsi comes to mind and I can imagine there are several dozen other. Bear in mind that Tsotsi is a South African movie.
The music songs don't really matter. Some OST's are really good but I can imagine that POTC would have been just as good without Hans Zimmer's scores.

Yes. Several times.

@Spikedcylinder, I think you shouldn't rate Hans that low. I know you didn't mean to but I really love that guy. And now that I know that these Qs were directed at nollywood, I'd say u can classify the 'soundtracks' into shitty, unbelievably shitty, and unfuckingbelievably shitty. One that stuck with was this one "onome, onome, love is yours" It had Olu Jacobs in it.

1) In movies you really like, what do you think was most important?
 
The script
 Who does the movie star?
 The characters
 The plot/storyline
 Special effects
 Music/songs
 Visuals (does it look good on the big screen?)
 Action
 Romance
 Suspense
 Actually feeling the characters' emotions


2) What do you think spoils movies most?
 A bad script
 Irritating characters
 Poor storyline
 Themes that have been done too many times
 If it's too long or slow
 If it's too short
 Noticeable mistakes (continuity, seeing cameras when you shouldn't, etc)
 Having to yell `Just kiss him/her!'
 Overplayed action/romance scenes
 A stupid or radical ending
 Being based extremely loosely on a book
 Being too predictable
 Being too radical
In other words all of the above

3) Have you stopped watching a movie before the end of it?
 Yes
 No
I try not to, but if its a Nollywood movie , sometimes i stop before i even start.

4) What is your opinion on movie sequels?
 Every movie should have a sequel!
 Some sequels are good e.g. Aliens 2, Terminator 2 (T2), etc
 No, any sequel is rarely as good as the original
 Can nobody think of something original?


When it actually comes to Nollycrap, everything always points to the negative. By the way did anybody ever see Amazing Grace? i was going to but when i saw The first Nigerian film on 35mm boldly written on the cover of the DVD case, i got pissed and walked away. Was it any good?

@Baby Jinx
I'm drowning still.

So what if they used film instead of a minicam, or those giant reporter like cameras. It's still bull made on 35mm. That just goes to show u how lowly these people are. The first nigerian film on 35mm. U gotta hand it to them

Oh man! I set a trap for our Nollywood lovers but they didn't take the bait. The point of the questionnaire was to see how their criteria for judging a good movie, applies Nollywood movies. It was meant to show 'em we aren't pulling stuff out of our. . . Errrr. . . . from thin air.

Guess they've just stopped paying attention to us. Hehehehe


Vesc, Spikedcylinder and Thirdborn (whom this SISI is about to KILL for still not recognizing her) thanks for responding

And Vesc. . .

Shitty, Unbelievably shitty, and unfuckingbelievably shity

Rotflmao! What are you trying to do to me here? Seriously!!


Okay, My Take on what makes a good movie. . . .

Entertainment Value: I want to sit down to a movie and forget times exists. I want to be taken for a ride, I want to. . . Aah, just see Mad_Max"s post for this.

Dialogue: Great dialogue makes a movie. When the dialogue starts sounding stilted, then. . .  Nah!

Plot: It's all about KISS here. . . Keep It Simple, Stupid. Except it is really, really vital, don't try to complicate things.

Pace: Pacing is really, really important. I don't know about you but I have a very short attention span. Move it along, people. . . Nothing to see here.
 
Acting: Bad acting can sometimes be a pleasure to watch if it is intended to be that kind of movie but bad acting just because the actor is bad. . . Ay yi yi! It can ruin even the best movie.

Loopholes: All stories, except intended from jump, should answer all your questions. When you go "Wait. . . What?" at the end of the movie, them something ain't right.

Special Effects: Bad effects can kill an other wise good movie. Like the white squiggly lines across the screen to show thunder striking someone down. . . Not good.

Less is more: What irks me so much in Nigerian movies is the lack of subtilty, please don't treat us like idiots you need to spell things out to.

Believability: I think this is IMPORTANT. Oh Believability. . . How much I love thee. The other day, I was being held hostage by the Sis, had no choice but to watch a movie called ALL MY LIFE. Heaven please us. . . Omotola and Bimbo as school girls? Omotola asking her husband to get her sister pregnant? Oh come on!

Continuity: if you want to make a sequel please make sure you have exhausted part one before going to part to.

If a movies misses on at least to of the above. . . . It's officially a bad movie.


Okay, okay. . . KISS is really Keep it Short and Simple but I think the AND ruins the effect, that's why I like the other one.

Anyhoo, what next?

Long Sigh

Band leader, this is Sisi. How won't you recognize me now?

I'm sad oooh!! It hurt me, hurt me reach my soul



Anyhoo, this is another cheerleading session to keep our thread at the top. Why they haven't yet made it a sticky is beyond me but hey. . . I ain't sayin' nothin'. I mean it is not your usual Who want to Marry Jim Iyke, He is sooo dreamy Thread but like I said my mouth is zipped. If it's a thread about Omotola's Pimple now, they will put it gbagba on number one but I'm just going to keep


Sooo here I go

Go Go RPT Go Go
Go You Fearless Ones Go
Tell it as it, Yes Do
Nollywood are you shaking
because we are brungin' it on
Yes we are ^{(Gimme a break, I never cheered before)}




PS
I'm wearing shorts, so you can stop looking now.

I knew it was you Sisi.

@Vesc
you don't believe that $1,000,000 crap do you?

@poster,i support you.Nollywood needs a revolution.All i can say is that nollywood 'Sucks' .

meanwhile check out Jerusalema from SA. another Oscar hopeful. beta than Tsotsi

either high horse or low donkey,the fact still remains that im t least addressing the poster's thread unless im mistaken of which i stand to be corrected, presumably from my own limited understanding what everyone wants to see is better nollywood productions,what we want to do is pro active and far reaching "revolution"to change the way things are done in nollywood,and what we all want comments on are ways to go abouth this,how and when to go about it in a workable frame, if the thread is not about that then i stand to be corrected, as for "thread by request"and "dancing monkey"all i can say is  sounds like  good title for our newly revolutionised nollywood

and i have a very hard time understanding yours as well as it seems more of sarcasm,loads witty remarks, and i m not even making any pretence that i did cause i dont lie, sorry

well,thanks for taking the time to break it down for me, but judging from this thread and other nollywood threads on this section,i think most people know where nollywood is failing and while people have diffrent approaches to bringing about a revolution,they  have proffered different solutions covering the  totality of the nollywood malaise.

well,good for the dancing monkeys,but if you care to re -read my comments,i didnt generalise,it was a personal comment and the last i checked everybody was entitled to their opinions,however i wouldnt call well over 2/3 different nollywood threads on here alone with multiple pages/posters all proferring solutions "alone"
by my layman's definition of audience,im cock sure the amount of posters on this thread and others are more than enough sample of nigerians across the board, who are conversant with nollywood

if i understood your last comments well,and i hope im wrong, i hope you r not insinuating that im an idiot??because i seem to think you r asserting that "me presumably jumping into stuffs is unfortunate"
please if thats what you meant,i dont want us to go down that route at all so ill humbly advice you to withdraw that verbal barb and refrain from using such,  in as much as i have neither directed any statement at you nor have i insulted you, i can give as good as i  can take but ill like us to keep this  thread as an intellectual discource and personally dont relish insulting peoplexxthanks

as for diving headlong,well its a public forum ,and i made my own comments the way i see it and i have justified them due to others that might later read this,so i dont realli need you to agree with me and im sure neither do you need me to agree with you