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CimonJorr (m)
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Can/Should a guy withold sex from his partner  I was reading through some topics today.. [well, to be honest, over the last couple of weeks...  ] And something struck me.. I see a lot of posts where a girl is witholding having sex with a guy.. whom she may have dated for various lengths of time but is definitely currently dating.. for a host of reasons.. Some as varied from: "It's not time for that yet" or "the relationship hasn't gotten to that stage" or "it's morally wrong or sinful" or "the relationship would be better without sex being involved"... or the classic.. "honey, I've got a headache"..  And the funniest part is that this doesn't just apply to the single folk in the house.. Married women are known to partake in this as well... Now my question (or should I say point rather) is this... If the shoe were on the other foot, how would it feel?? I mean, if men were to tell their partners [married or otherwise] that they weren't in the mood for sex.. or better still, if they were to withold this basic component of relationships from their female partners, what would be the reaction?.. How would you view it??  |
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K2DaC (f)
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Uhh yes he can but i would need a good reason why he doesnt want to.
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casper (m)
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I do withhold it and i have a very good reason for it. Withholding it from them makes you feel unique and makes them never want to leave you even after telling them it is over they still want to be able to reach you always. |
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hot-angel (f)
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It's better to withhold. You could tease, and tease.. but just don't do it. That will keep the relationship stronger. As singles that is. But when married, Dude, you got to tell me why you aint gon have it with me... hello you are my husband.. I need it, Oya give me. If you know you wont be able to give me... tralala... Let's decide to have an Open marriage. |
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casper (m)
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on my marriage night my wife will almost get bow leg na only God go know how that day go be oooooooooooo kai |
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CimonJorr (m)
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It's better to withhold. You could tease, and tease.. but just don't do it. That will keep the relationship stronger. As singles that is. But when married, Dude, you got to tell me why you aint gon have it with me... hello you are my husband.. I need it, Oya give me. If you know you wont be able to give me... tralala... Let's decide to have an Open marriage. @ hot-angel.. Is that the reason why some women do it then??.. To tease the men As a 'relationship' building exercise... In the cases I've come across, it isn't really a case of the babes in question teasing their men.. but a case of them being totally not interested in having sex.. for some of the reasons mentioned earlier.. Some use it as a punishment.. some as a test.. others don't really believe it's a component for a successful relationship.. The common denominator for all is that at the end of the day, the men just don't get any... And while some just accept it as their portion in life.. others resort to some more creative means to obtain their "daily need"... So, back to what I was saying earlier.. if the men were to pay women back in their own coin.. what would the result be.. how do women view this ?? |
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layi (m)
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Should a man withold sex from his partner?
No.
He's got no justifiable reason to except u want to punish her (which in itself is against the spirit of Love).
U can refuse if you have genuine reasons...(like beign tired). But withold? For no reason? Hell no. Thats wrong.
NB: [what I mean by] partner [in this post of mine] is your wife and none else.
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whiteshark (m)
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Except on occasions when I don’t feel right or she's on her periods, I don’t see any reason why if she says she want it she can’t have it. If she was naughty recently ok!! If she has been getting on my nerves, yes!! Just to show whose Boss but the truth is you can’t horde it from her for long or else you'll be encouraging some certain sleeping devils inherent in every human to start rearing it's ugly head. You don need a genius to explain what I mean now. Do you? .....I don’t think so……. Take care folks…….
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twinkledew (f)
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haha.
layi if u were in a relationship now and your girlfriend ask u for sex what would u say to her?
if a guy withhold sex for no reason then he is cheating on the girl.
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hot-angel (f)
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@ hot-angel.. Is that the reason why some women do it then??.. To tease the men As a 'relationship' building exercise... Not always... but mostly. Cosmopolitan said it's a good way of keeping a relationship strong. You do all the romantic stuffs, actually get almost naked... just do the teasing, make sure you know the kind of man you gat. If your man is a dog... don't tease him. because if you don't give him what he wants, he'll find another girl. But if you and your man understand each other... teasing is a very good way of being strong, because the man would want to have a taste of you, a taste of what you don't want to give him, and that my friend, will keep him.  |
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FOD (m)
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if a guy withhold sex for no reason then he is cheating on the girl.
...can the guys say same to the girls? I will say understanding and trusting your partner matter most. Without a good reason, u have no right to withold (for the married ones). |
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hot-angel (f)
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...can the guys say same to the girls?
Hell yes we can. If a lady says no sex to her husband... She's cheating on him. One thing i want us to get here is that, When married, the case is totally different from when you are not married. Like if you are married and you can't give your spouse "it" when s/he wants it, i totally think you are cheating on her/him. If you aint married and both of you already started having pre-marital sex, and all of a sudden your partner said s/he can give "it" to you, ermmm... s/he's either cheating or changed his/her mind about pre-marital sex. If you are in a relationship that both of you havent had sex before, and you are kind of like not into premarital sex thingy... but one day, one of you decide you want 'it' and the other person denies you of 'it"... i totally don't see why you should suspect our patner is cheating on you. Afterall both of you aint into it anyways.. besides, your patner could think you are just testing him/her to see whether or not s/he'll fall into the premarital sex trap. |
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tcherokee (m)
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Hot-Angel, please don't tell me u listen to cosmo for ur relationship advice, they are not always right you know!!!
Anyway i really can't see what will see what will make a guy say he wants to withhold sex from his girlfriend or wife and ladies if he withholds sex from be very suspicious xcept if he's tired or has a lot on his mind and that you will know. Ladies if you and your guy have started doing it, it is usually not a good idea to now say you are witholding it from him.
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hot-angel (f)
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Cosmo isnt always right.... but so is everyone. They are like 89% right. The rest you need to do is use common sense.  |
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CimonJorr (m)
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In relationships, men are always expected to play the bigger role.. I guess its because of the popular misconception of men being able to see things more clearly, or being able to "see the bigger picture".. When ever a woman gets it into her head to deny her partner sex [I appologise for my choice of words, but this is the clearest way I can express myself at the moment.. ], which she can do for any one of a million reasons, she automatically expects the man to understand... at times resorting to the most laughable of subterfuges in order to carry out her aim... If a man was to respond in kind, would women be equally understanding??.. or would they jump to the automatic conclusion that "if a man isn't giving it to them, then he must be giving it to someone else outsite.. "?? I hear of several relationships where a guy wants sex, the babe refuses, the guy walks away, and the babe goes all hurt... Not because she's never had sex before and wanted to keep her virginity intact, but because she felt she could use this as a control over the guy, and her plan back-fired... I also hear of cases when a married woman would deny her husband sex, either to press home a point, or alternatively just because she doesn't see it as that necessary a component of a successful marrige (hey.. she's already got the guy.. his ring is on her finger), or for any plethora of reasons.. some significant.. others quite mundane... And we're not talking about short-term here.. but something which may stretch into months.. Another view that women have is that guys can't or just won't keep "Johnny-B" in their trousers.. that they aren't capable of that... that men just don't have the ability... if a man goes for any period of time without demanding sex from them, then he must be getting it from elsewhere.. My question was meant to elicit from the women-folk what they would do if men all over were to carry out the radically "treasonable" act of denying them sex.. whether married or single.. as long as u're in a relationship with the person.. and sex used to be a component of that relationship... Could they take it??.. Or would they shift their attentions elsewhere??.. because that seems to be the vast impression they have of what men would do.. if under the same conditions.. |
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CimonJorr (m)
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@ hot-angel.. A-J, Magazines like Cosmo write what they feel the reader wants to hear.. Not necessarily what is correct... |
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Rhodalyn (f)
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sex in a relationship is involuntary!!!!!!!!!
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Hotstepper (f)
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i don't believe that sex should be practiced in a relationship but unforunately, datz one of da reasons people enter relatonship for and when da gurl refuses, he finds a reason 2 break up or start cheat and da gurl will be forced 2 dump his ass, as 4 moi, relationship is all about getting 2 know eachother and can do other things but not sex bt now itz a necessity 4 a relationship. den u found out da after that, problms will come up, they break up and get another victim, i would like 2 know how many people dated a guy or gurl, had sex with them and got married or even dated 2 years after that,
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Hotstepper (f)
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sorry 4 typo errors |
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eveseh (f)
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sex in a relationship is involuntary!!!!!!!!!
that's right |
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horny4u (f)
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Ah My husband can never withhold from me hey i have tools one is a short see through dress (clingy) and a black feathery kitten heels and spray on my provocative woman perfume. i use these in doing my domestic work,when i bend over the vaccum cleaner , my husband eyes bend with me If he dares that rubbish, I will tempt him to high heavens and invoke his memory IF he is tired i will be on top of the tiredness If he has things on his mind i will get on my knees and use my hands and my mouth to explain Who born monkey, |
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lady bam (f)
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Ah My husband can never withhold from me hey i have tools one is a short see through dress (clingy) and a black feathery kitten heels and spray on my provocative woman perfume. i use these in doing my domestic work,when i bend over the vaccum cleaner , my husband eyes bend with me If he dares that rubbish, I will tempt him to high heavens and invoke his memory IF he is tired i will be on top of the tiredness If he has things on his mind i will get on my knees and use my hands and my mouth to explain Who born monkey, OHHHHHH!!!! I see. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . |
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sistawoman (f)
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If my husband ever denied me I would just rape his ass. I am not afraid of taking what i want.
He tried my hand one time and got raped.
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dudu19 (m)
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@sista, rape him up d ass Are you into kinky sex , thats just so immoral May God help d poor guy |
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sistawoman (f)
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whats wrong with knowing what you want and going after it. I don't play hold out on him and he should never try to to pretend he is going to hold out on me. Shit even when my monthly calls he still gets head daily. |
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francessby (f)
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it's not proper at all especially for married couple
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