Who is a True Nigerian?

A true Nigerian does not waste his/her money on 'luxuries' such as vacuum cleaners, microwave ovens, washing machines, and dishwashers.  This is because it is more economical to spend hours every day manually warming food on a stove, sweeping floors with a bent back, and washing.  Extra money should be spent on necessities like highly advanced camera phones, which will only be used for making voice calls!

A true Nigerian never makes appointments on time.  It is ok to be late for 30 minutes to one hour.  If you're a big man or big woman, then you can delay an appointment by up to 4 hours withouit an apology.  If your host gets angry or decides to cancel your meeting due to your lateness, it simply shows that he/she needs to learn patience and respect.

A true Nigerian believes that thieving leaders should be prosecuted executed, because the punishment should fit the crime.   That is why petty thieves in Lagos are usually lynched when they are caught.  A true Nigerian knows that stealing and killing are basically the same thing - afterall, most of us have never stolen in our lives.

A true Nigerian believes that we are morally superior to the people who live in developed countries.  This is why we are not the second most corrupt nation in the world, and there is no crime in Nigeria.

A true Nigerian doesn't know how much time is taken by common tasks like housekeeping, cooking a particular meal, or making a frequent trip.  When you ask, "how long will it take?" the answer is "a short while.  just wait for me".  Ask, "will it take up to 30 minutes?" and the answer is "just wait".  That is why we don't need timers in Nigeria.  We are a patient people!

seun i love that piece. hope you're a true nigerian. meanwhile i did my NYSC in ogun state, sagamu 2 b precise. my regrds 2 OGD.

a true 9gerian steals his peoples money and they applaud and reward him with chieftancy titles.

a true 9gerian will always protect  a thief who steals his peoples and stashes it in foreign lands.

I think most of you have been describing the adultrated Nigerians......,

I believe a true Nigerian is resilent, filled with hope for a good tomorrow. A good Nigerian belief in Justice, believe in God absolutely even when robbed by the leaders every day. A true Nigerian believes that working hard, one day he/she will become somebody in the society. A true Nigerian believes that if he doesnt make it in this life, his offsprings would and will carry on the glory of his family. A true Nigerian believes in hard work, believes that he must continue striving no matter how diificult, even dying in the process.

A true Nigerian is cheated everyday, swindled by the so called leaders, disregarded by the society he belongs to and scorned by those who had used him to get rich. A true Nigerian believes in a brighter tomorrow, is not discouraged by negativity in leadership, society, politics etc.

The true Nigerian is robbed daily, beaten by the police, swindled by government parastatals, denied basic amenities by the government he has voted for, punctual at work, works hard every day, salary delayed for several months. He is made to pay for services he will never enjoy (National Health and Pension Schemes, National housing fund, Insurrance, etc)

A true Nigerian do not see the difference in Hausa, Yoruba, Ibo, etc. He sees everyone possitively contributing to the glory of Nigeria.

The true Nigerians are in the market places, striving for their meagre income, they are in Niger delta, living in oil spilled villages, they are in the villages toiling in the burning sun, they are in the cities toiling day and night to make ends meet, they are the rich that spends their money on the masses, they build industries to employ many, they are philantrophic to a fault.

The true Nigerian are the "andrews". Though they toil in foreign land, their meagre resources is used to keep thousand at home. They work hard for every penny they earn. They are incorruptible. They live respectable lifes. The love their families, their kinsmen. They would give all they have to their fellow men than steal from them.

A true Nigerian is filled with love for fellow country men.

I love a true Nigerian.

Note: I'm too optimistic to a fault.

the combination is true, i mean Seun and Bibi's description of a Nigerian. A true Nigerian will know that.

that is a hard question to answer. I think memories are what makes a true Nigeria, memories of growing up in a city, town, or village. Memories ingrained into your very beings if you have those I think that you are a true Nigeria. I myself feel like I am loosing touch with Nigeria, my memories grow fuzzy with each year and there is nothing that I cando to stop it.

I FOUND IT!!!


 You know you are Nigerian or African:


If your name is so long, or so hard to pronounce, that you either have some "Americanized" nickname, or you use your middle name (which is English).

If, you know what your name means.

If you know of anyone (including yourself) that has any of the following names: Ola, Sade, Bola, Tunji, Ngozi, Uche, Folake, Ifeoma, Tolu, Tunde, Obi, Chioma, Chituru, Chinyere, Adaobi, Nkemi, Nneka, Bunmi or Fatima

If, names like Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Friday, Patience, Peace, Blessing, God's Will or Mercy sound pretty normal to you.

If, rice and stew just isn't the same without plantain (dodo)

If, you would prefer Moin Moin, or Farina (fufu) with soup over McDonalds any day.

If, you have ever treated a cold or sorethroat with "Pe-pe Soup".. AND IT WORKED!!!!!!

If you know what AKATA means.

If, your parents or relatives have ever disliked someone because of the simple fact that they were AKATA.

(for females) If, not being able to cook stew or soup is one of the most major burdens in life.

(another one for females only)If, a Nigerian man who is about 2 or 3 times your age has ever tried to spit game......eeeeeeewwwwww!

If, you have ever gone to a Nigerian "get-together" and made a handful of money just for dancing.

If, the fact that NAS ESCOBAR is half-Naija makes you so damn happy.

If, not properly greeting an elderly Nigerian person has ever gotten you in a load of trouble.

If, you or someone you know has ever been sent to Nigeria because of behavioral problems, or if your parents have ever threatened to do so.

If, 'afrocentric' AKATA's get on your nerves with those tiger striped outfits.

If, when you were little you got FLOGGED (spanked) by someone who of course is Nigerian, but is not your parent.. And your parents had their back, instead of yours! (shady huh?)

If, you are mad that Musiq Soul Child (even though he's cool) is getting props for starting the "headwrap" craze when you or your mom's been doing that since the dino-age.

If, your parents own expensive ass lace (like 200-300 dollars for one outfit), and they act shady when you want money for clothes.

If, your parents have ever compared your life here in America to theirs in Nigeria. (i.e. boarding school, no electricity, fetching water, Nigerian Civil War....etc)

If, when you parents curse you want so bad to laugh, but you don't want to get slapped.

If, you parents use the word bloody to conjugate words a lot (e.g. bloody fool, bloody nonsense, bloody coward, bloody idiot, bloody shit)

If, your parents use phrases like "Ewhoa, Chineke, Che, Ah-Ah, Yepa! God forbid or by God's Grace".

If, your parents have ever threatened to kill you, break your head, back, or neck, or to "show you pepe".

If, any Nigerian kid that you known for a long ass time is your "cousin". Yeah, Right!

If, you have a relative that owns a "shop". Especially if it is a shop that caters mainly to foreigners.

If, all of your parents Nigerian friends are your "Uncles and Auntie's.. not Aunts but Aunties.

If, when you are around Nigerians your accent either comes out of nowhere, or becomes thicker.

If, you have Naija relatives in Europe (especially London, England)

If, you have a rough estimate of how many Nigerians are at your school.

If, you are friends with someone just because they're Nigerian.

If, you bond with people more from other African countries (Ghana, Sierra Leone, Gambia, Eritrea, Ethiopia), more than Americans

If, you or your parents have some kind of stereotype about another Nigerian tribe

If, you know more than anything that your tribe is the best tribe

If, you know for sure that the Super Eagles are by far the best soccer team in the world.

If, you have ever bought green chucks just to match a shirt that has the Nigerian flag on it.. GREEN WHITE GREEN!

If, you know anyone with dark ass hands and a bright ass face. I wont tell if you wont!

If, you attend or have visited a predominantly Nigerian church.

And finally, YOU KNOW THAT YOUR ARE A TRUE TO THE HEART AFRICAN KING OR QUEEN if you are a GOOD DANCER! Cause ya know Africans have rhythm like WHOA!

I know right??