Nigerian Men, Sex And Affairs: Non-nigerian Women Speak

here comes the coco. Word up sweetie. you know i ve gat ur back anyday 

Brownsuga where are you??? :
you can't leave now, 

i watch and i learn soooo much from this,
wher r u???

@ dido

 

Are u waiting for a wedding invitation? 

i'm going to stick my neck out and make some comments.
Nigerian men grow up in an environment where morals are extremely conservative. women in their world,,, it is my belief,,, exist as merely chattel. they cannot deal with independent strong will women. a woman has to obey their every whim and fancy,,, to do otherwise is a threat to their manhood. so when they are in another environment, such as a society that allow women their equality status. the relationship between a nigerian man and
non-nigerian woman cannot be sustained because the nigerian man constantly harbour doubt about the woman's fedelity. and he knows that the authority he has over her is nothing in comparison to his native cultural practices. so women,,,, if you are dealing with a nigerian,,,chances are you are not getting his 100% love. he is always looking to find himself his contritely submissive female.

please send your feedback.

@ Elidegreat, brother that was an awful conclusion you made of non-n women and then u say no offence intended, or was that only directed at coco29?

"Reading Coco29 in whom @Brownsuga saw herself, I am beginning to understand why those N men dump u non N women. You sound as if your greatest selling points are your sex appeals and you have no inhibitions about sex. No thoroughbred Nman would want to marry a chick who has gone round the neighborhood s*ckin & F**kin all the cocks around?!Coco29 is the “wrongest” person to judge a Nman. No offence intended"

Sex is just an element of a relationship. However mine was not only based on sex. Because of one story u come to that conclusion? Plz explain.

"I am sorry, but I am left with no choice than to conclude that most non n women are like Coco (adventurous and wild!). I am yet to find a single, thorough bred N man who would take such character (of his own free will) to the Alter! I may be wrong, but I am yet to find the person. No Nman wants a wife that has gone round his neighborhood at different times in the past"

Meanwhile I think @Brownsuga should apologise for the statement below

The conclusions i made were 1) based on my own exp and that made here. I was selective. Indeed i again generalised. I apologize. A month of discussing on this thread has enlightened me, there were reasonable men and unreasonable ones with a painfully small screen of the world.


@Lettergirl, thx for the solidarity. However i am not an AA. And i don't agree with you that there is such a thing as an "homogenous African culture".

@Neelsel, immigration maybe an emergent global challenge, but i don't thik we can reduce infidelity to such excuses.

@Superman: "all these coment are simply reflecting that nigerian men are simply clever for real! not sure if I'm right". You are simply wrong. Period!

As for Dido, dear you have brought into the thread a new dimension. I found your story a bit peculiar. You have known this man for 3 years and you have been doupting him eversince? I find it hard to give an advice because you shared little of your strory with us. Is the whole family now living together? If so doesnt t seem obvious that this family is busy reconstructing their home? The ex-wife is expecting another child?   Plus he doesnt want to talk,

And despite all this pain that this is causing you, you still have sex with him? Why do you allow that? don't you respect your body? I think you need to sit down with this man and have this important conversation you are having with us. I wish you much luck,

I think some women in general display a cheap notion of themselves and they in turn get treated like that , trush. You deserve better therefore demand better treatment and most importantly radiate respect for your body and spirit and listen to your inner voice.

Are you Nigerian?

coco29,i meant don't let people play with ur feelings, lool

Thx for sticking your head into this discussion, lol.  Interesting perspective. I respect your opinion, but unless you elaborate further, i am afraid i'D classify your arguments as really shortsighted. Does the "fidelity issue" also involve Nigerian women who are also indep/successfull? Are you saying that N men are untruthful only to non-n women?

i started from the begining and read the threads. Conclusion: Most Nigerian men are Backward in their sexual thinking. no apology. and they have an extremely selfish view on relationships. They want cuchie from women,,,,but consider women that give up the cuchie to be loose and not worth commiting to.
backward thinking leads to backward behaviour, backward behaviour lead to backward society,backward society leads to exploitation and corruption and backward society lead to rampant poverty. nuff said.

@ dido

if there are more naive females like you out there, I wish I would be a nigerian man in my next live and meet you .

sorry but what is your problem? are you di*k wipped ,because you are blinder than blind ! 

SORRY you need to get your head screwed back on your neck where it belong to.

how stupid can women be,I nearly have no words for that.

are there more women like YOU  !!! on the island ?

must be a man's paradise.

you say you respect your body, how about show some respect to your brain, are you really that blind, he will never tell you that he is with this other woman,N E V E R .

why should he? he got his cake AND EAT IT TOO

@Germanlady, sistah i think you were too hard on Dido. That was not necessary.

@dido, sis, this is the whole point i started this discussion about the fact that N men are such conniving deceits.
I think it is due to the fact that they are so good at what they do-meaning the cheating and unfaithfullness- that, unles one is also fully skilled, they fall into the trap.

You said you love this man. I loved the N man i was with. I thought i'D die if i didnt see him again. For me he was my first love. He lied to me too in the beginning and until today i don't know why he did that. But today, eventhough he calls and writes, i am trying to get over him and heal the bitterness. I am sure you can do the same,

The point is dear, he lied to you initially and he will do it again-meaning he is not honest. I don't think he wants to commit. So you should sit down and make some serious decisions; do u want to just be in the rship and still enjoy the sex u obviously enjoy so much, or are you also ready to move forward and be loved for your own worth by someone who will love you equally.

Gosh i came here seeking advice, now i am giving one, loool!! and i think am good at it too,

Where is coco29 our councillor, maybe she has a better advice/approach??!!!

I do, i have been through it, it took mrmajor and some other harsh-welcome-back-to earth sentiments that shook me out of it,

Why do I see parallels between Dido and Brownsuga's case. Either way you both should have stepped the moment your heads screamed "hell no". 

Thanks Brownsuga, and you are right I am in love with this guy and I do love our sex sessions  .  I know that it's going to be hard for me to move on from him but I think it's worth a try.  My whole thing is that I can't see myself being with anyone else, I hate the fact that I might have to start all over as far as getting to know someone.  I always took comfort telling myself that is better to know what I have then to leave and get into something worst, but can it really be worst than this.  

I just feel like I've given my all and put so much time and effort into our relationshp for him to not appreciate that and see that I do love him.  I know that I never cheated as his Baby mother did and honestly had no intentions.  I tell myself that I was probably faithful to a man that was not even mine to begin with and most women do not do that today.  The truth is if he comes to me right now I would still continue to be here for him and do whatever he asks of me, and I have no problem in doing anything for him it's just that I feel like its not getting us anywhere.

I will try my best to let it go!  Thanks

n-men still very clever human being! badman move forward! oh well haha going mad