Can U Maintain A Long Distance Relationship & What Can U Do To Make It Work?

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Nairaland Forum  |  General Discussion  |  Romance (Moderators: mukina2, debosky, iice)  |  Can U Maintain A Long Distance Relationship & What Can U Do To Make It Work?
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Author Topic: Can U Maintain A Long Distance Relationship & What Can U Do To Make It Work?  (Read 5275 views)
rotbog (m)
Re: Can U Maintain A Long Distance Relationship & What Can U Do To Make It Work?
« #32 on: September 14, 2006, 09:19 AM »

U May Never.
njidexy (f)
Re: Can U Maintain A Long Distance Relationship & What Can U Do To Make It Work?
« #33 on: September 14, 2006, 01:59 PM »

i am into one myself but it has not been easy.this guy was my course mate right from school and i never really knew him well then ,i just know him as a friend and after our final exams we lost contact till 3 years later he told my best friend to tell me he wants to marry me .well iliked him and i agreed after taking little time but the thing now is that i miss this guy so much that it hurts,i am tired of communicating with him on phone because no one wants to burn credit, and i recently met this guy i like where i stay and it is almost trying to drown me .i mean i see this one everyday or almost every time.but i still love this other one and we are planning to get married but i feel the distance is dragging us apart.so plz tell me what is going to happen. Sad

CHRISTEL (f)
Re: Can U Maintain A Long Distance Relationship & What Can U Do To Make It Work?
« #34 on: September 14, 2006, 02:46 PM »

Quote from: njidexy on September 14, 2006, 01:59 PM
i am into one myself but it has not been easy.this guy was my course mate right from school and i never really knew him well then ,i just know him as a friend and after our final exams we lost contact till 3 years later he told my best friend to tell me he wants to marry me .well iliked him and i agreed after taking little time but the thing now is that i miss this guy so much that it hurts,i am tired of communicating with him on phone because no one wants to burn credit, and i recently met this guy i like where i stay and it is almost trying to drown me .i mean i see this one everyday or almost every time.but i still love this other one and we are planning to get married but i feel the distance is dragging us apart.so plz tell me what is going to happen. Sad

 
njidexy, I understand where u're coming from. it must be very hard for you.
is there no way u can pay each other a visit, i mean even if it's 4 a few days Huh
at least that will go a very long way Huh
or are u both out of each others reach maybe due to certain barriers Huh
rotbog (m)
Re: Can U Maintain A Long Distance Relationship & What Can U Do To Make It Work?
« #35 on: September 14, 2006, 02:54 PM »

@CHRISTEL. How are U. I can C U are now a counselor. How bout puttin up a Talk Show or beta still a Chat Show.

U can borrow a tip or two from Oprah. At least it would be a more fruitful venture. Talk about impacting "Poositiively" on the society. Cheesy
CHRISTEL (f)
Re: Can U Maintain A Long Distance Relationship & What Can U Do To Make It Work?
« #36 on: September 14, 2006, 03:02 PM »

Quote from: rotbog on September 14, 2006, 02:54 PM
@CHRISTEL. How are U. I can C U are now a counselor. How bout puttin up a Talk Show or beta still a Chat Show.

U can borrow a tip or two from Oprah. At least it would be a more fruitful venture. Talk about impacting "Poositiively" on the society. Cheesy
too late 4 pleasantries rotbog Cheesy
u've insulted me all this time. but i can't blame u, it's a free world Cheesy
it's d shit u get for being online.  but all d same, no hurt feelings Cheesy
Damollar (m)
Re: Can U Maintain A Long Distance Relationship & What Can U Do To Make It Work?
« #37 on: September 14, 2006, 03:10 PM »

Long distance relationships difficult to maintain
Leaving your other half behind can be difficult and painful for both people involved. ,

Since you two can't be together physically, photos will have to work. ,
The most important thing is that you maintain consistency, and that you make visiting a priority,
rotbog (m)
Re: Can U Maintain A Long Distance Relationship & What Can U Do To Make It Work?
« #38 on: September 14, 2006, 04:14 PM »

Quote from: CHRISTEL on September 14, 2006, 03:02 PM
too late 4 pleasantries rotbog Cheesy
u've insulted me all this time. but i can't blame u, it's a free world Cheesy
it's d shit u get for being online. but all d same, no hurt feelings Cheesy


Aaaww. I'm so touched. please don't make me cry. Cry Cry Cry

So forgiving. Embarrassed Embarrassed
CHRISTEL (f)
Re: Can U Maintain A Long Distance Relationship & What Can U Do To Make It Work?
« #39 on: September 15, 2006, 05:31 PM »

Quote from: sexyboy on September 14, 2006, 06:49 AM
I don't Understand.
meaning Huh Huh Huh
kaecy5 (m)
Re: Can U Maintain A Long Distance Relationship & What Can U Do To Make It Work?
« #40 on: September 27, 2006, 09:27 PM »

hello people this topic sure affects me
i should going away for awhile most probably minimum of 3 years. my girlfriend for 3 years has not yet come to terms with it she is sure hysterical, well i am feeling the hurt already but am pretending to be strong
we sure love each other

the last time i was away for 1 month it was hell the phone bills went up to the skies, and we sure miss each other
now the scary part is her family issues

her dad went on cross posting for 3 years and never / has not yet come back after 15 years she is hell scared that what happend to her mom might repeat it self

i sure love her, she makes my world complete , just a little confused Embarrassed
GermanLady (f)
Re: Can U Maintain A Long Distance Relationship & What Can U Do To Make It Work?
« #41 on: September 27, 2006, 09:42 PM »

Quote from: kaecy5 on September 27, 2006, 09:27 PM
hello people this topic sure affects me
i should going away for awhile most probably minimum of 3 years. my girlfriend for 3 years has not yet come to terms with it she is sure hysterical, well i am feeling the hurt already but am pretending to be strong
we sure love each other

the last time i was away for 1 month it was hell the phone bills went up to the skies, and we sure miss each other
now the scary part is her family issues

her dad went on cross posting for 3 years and never / has not yet come back after 15 years she is hell scared that what happend to her mom might repeat it self

i sure love her, she makes my world complete , just a little confused Embarrassed

if you really love her - be with her - stay ,or take her with you.

If I were a man and I would love my woman,I would not want her to be without me.

Make it happen !
naija116 (f)
Re: Can U Maintain A Long Distance Relationship & What Can U Do To Make It Work?
« #42 on: September 28, 2006, 03:52 AM »

Honestly long distance relationships are extremely hard to maintain. First there is the issue of remaining faithful, which is probably the most important aspect of a healthy relationship, but a very difficult thing to do from say "across the atlantic ocean" (literally).  Also when two people are so far away, its hard to really learn about your partner or get to know them on a more personal level because you just can't talk to them or see them as much.  I feel as though long distance relationships can only work if you have been in a relationship for a long time before the separation and that way both parties know enough about each other and can be more confident that their relationship works.  I am currently in a so-called "long distance relationship" but I don't think its working very well.  Although its been going on for a while now, I really don't feel that much more connected than I did in the beginning, but my "male friend" claims to be so in love, which is hard for me to believe cause I've heard rumors of his infidelty, which makes me lose more and more faith in the possibility of this relationship actually going much farther.  I'm scared that if I continue you to lead him on he will propose to me, in short, i'm really just confused about the whole thing.  I don't know the best way to break it off with him without seeming like a heartless jerk.  Please if anybody has any suggestions, please give me a holla!!!! Huh Huh Huh
segun111 (m)
Re: Can U Maintain A Long Distance Relationship & What Can U Do To Make It Work?
« #43 on: September 28, 2006, 05:18 AM »

I will not recommend any long distance relationship with anyone because it is hard to face. I was involved with a naija girl up till about six months ago when we broke it off. I spend countless hours, money on phone cards and lots of suspicions when am in a meeting or sleeping when she called or the telephone disconnect or family interference. I personally won't recommend it and I will never face that situation ever again.
Roscodaddy (m)
Re: Can U Maintain A Long Distance Relationship & What Can U Do To Make It Work?
« #44 on: November 12, 2006, 10:57 PM »

Long distance,hmmmm what can I say,it is so so hard but it can work,I am in one presently and in three years we have seen each other three times,the only thing is just trust,infact blind trust or else you will go mad,also if you are in one,please define where it is going to lead to instead of just drifting,as a man,of because I have had flings but I always put my relationship with my number 1 first.Not easy though but it is very much possible.
luvly (f)
Re: Can U Maintain A Long Distance Relationship & What Can U Do To Make It Work?
« #45 on: November 14, 2006, 11:23 AM »

i am presently in a long distance relationship and i think its working out fine.all i need is trust and prayer and by God's grace everything will end up fine.
kellorah (f)
Re: Can U Maintain A Long Distance Relationship & What Can U Do To Make It Work?
« #46 on: November 14, 2006, 11:00 PM »

if ure serious it'll work out. talking to each other on the phone,actually seeing each other etc will help.
'absence makes the heart grow fonder' but at the same time, 'out of sight, out of mind'
Beautygyal (f)
Re: Can U Maintain A Long Distance Relationship & What Can U Do To Make It Work?
« #47 on: November 14, 2006, 11:25 PM »

It depends both people agree, then u never no it might work.

If there's trust and honesty then evrythin wuld b ok!!! Cool Grin




Mbuzo
Re: Can U Maintain A Long Distance Relationship & What Can U Do To Make It Work?
« #48 on: November 15, 2006, 02:34 PM »

The biggest challenge in LDR is remaining faithful to your patner and maintaining trust for him/her. The biggest act of love is not TRUST. It is forgiveness. So I believe the solution lies with both parties learning the need to earn trust mutually and preparing to forgive mistakes that might happen. In whatever circumstance, genuine love have to exist mutually in order for everything to work. Prayers to this end does work wonders. Note however that there MUST be regular communication or else "out of sight out of mind" could occurr. Talk at least once in two days within Nigeria or once in a week across diapora. mbuzo2001@yahoo.com
ThoniaSlim (f)
Re: Can U Maintain A Long Distance Relationship & What Can U Do To Make It Work?
« #49 on: November 17, 2006, 12:55 AM »

hhhhmm it has worked for few people,it has not worked for lots of people.i believe nothing is impossible.it just depend on the individuals.
Damollar (m)
Can u maintain a long distance relationship?
« #50 on: November 18, 2006, 04:00 PM »

@ Thonia Slim - The key to making long-distance <a href="http://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/search.php?q=relationships">relationships</a> <a href="http://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/?=work">work</a> is to talk honestly and openly about how you feel and I'm not saying that you have to ditch <a href="http://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/school">school</a> or to wait for his or her calls.
ThoniaSlim (f)
Re: Can U Maintain A Long Distance Relationship & What Can U Do To Make It Work?
« #51 on: November 20, 2006, 08:53 PM »

@damollar
 am not saying it must work but av seen people it has worked for and those it has not worked for.
Mystique (f)
Re: Can U Maintain A Long Distance Relationship & What Can U Do To Make It Work?
« #52 on: November 21, 2006, 12:31 PM »

We, my boo and i seem to fight a whole lot less, now that we're long distance, the key is to communicate (email, sms, phone calls, webcam) at least once daily,  Kiss Kiss

But then again, if the bond wasnt strong in d first place, nothing can help you now,  Cry Cry
sammyjl (f)
Re: Can U Maintain A Long Distance Relationship & What Can U Do To Make It Work?
« #53 on: December 20, 2006, 07:02 AM »

 Sad No, I cannot maintain a long distance relationship. No ways. I have never done it and don't intend on doing it. I can't say I won't if it has to be because of relocations, such as work and so forth, but I don't even want to think about it.

[color=#770077]If I got a problem with my man living for two to three weeks for the holidays, how will I manage the many more weeks or months without him?!
I need my man to be near me and to cuddle him whenever necessary. Sure you can use text messages, emails and whatever means is necessary but still absence makes the heart grow fonder.

Who knows what he'll be doing there and what I'll be doing here, it'l be so hard for me.

So na, not for me. Shocked
CHRISTEL (f)
Re: Can U Maintain A Long Distance Relationship & What Can U Do To Make It Work?
« #54 on: December 20, 2006, 03:40 PM »

merry christmas to all my friends and a
wonderful new year to u all. i love u all
MUAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
elphem (m)
Re: Can U Maintain A Long Distance Relationship & What Can U Do To Make It Work?
« #55 on: December 22, 2006, 05:59 PM »

merry xmas christel, and the whole house
@ the topic
Really it is not an easy earned coin,  because the issue is all about feelings which invariably fades off with distance because of the enviroment the two parties are which have a great impact in the development of such relationship.
   Sometimes it can work when the distance is not that long that is, you can always shuttle to meet him or her. But gets tough when it is like across the ocean and the likes.
   It can only work in 2% out of the total 100
macalurs (m)
Re: Can U Maintain A Long Distance Relationship & What Can U Do To Make It Work?
« #56 on: December 22, 2006, 06:24 PM »

Christel,

I have a girl on long distance. We've been doing it for a yr exactly.

I miss her with my every being, even right now.

Here's what I do when I miss her. I call her and drool.

I call her like everyday for like 45mins. shhit that's alot of money some say, but I can't help it. We've known eachother for 4yrs now, honestly it aint easy. Neither is it for her. But I'm planning a surprise trip to naija 6months from now and I'm literally starving to scratch up money for that. I got off school and I'm working 2jobs just for her.

To me, I see it as an investment that'll will pay the world over when we're finally in each others arms. One day I told her I said "Baby I'll remember these days and I'll tell our kids that I loved their mother so much I travelled accross the world to spend a few days with her." She was crying. Words like these keep long-distance relationships alive.

Although very few people are creative enough to invent, one has the movies at his main guide. The only trick is communication. You've gotta talk about everything. but then not everyone has the resources to spend.

Don't gimme shit for being where few can be: THERE
somegirl (f)
Re: Can U Maintain A Long Distance Relationship & What Can U Do To Make It Work?
« #57 on: December 24, 2006, 12:49 PM »

Macalurs, I really hope it'll work out for the two of you. But if she loves you like you love her --- you sound like you could move mountains. Smiley

PS: Are you in Naija right now? I ask because of your profile ---  Undecided
macalurs (m)
Re: Can U Maintain A Long Distance Relationship & What Can U Do To Make It Work?
« #58 on: December 24, 2006, 03:21 PM »

sommey,

She tells me she loves me, more than I love her. You see, there's no way to prove if she does so I'm better off trusting her blindly.

No I'm not in naija. My profile is misleading.
eslynera (f)
Re: Can U Maintain A Long Distance Relationship & What Can U Do To Make It Work?
« #59 on: December 24, 2006, 03:30 PM »

@Topic, i bliv makin a relationship to work is faithfulness, and love itself.
just by makin sure you're loving the right person, (the one who also loves u right.)
making relationships lasting less, is forcing yourself into it, even if you know you're loving the wrong person. You'D even find him sleeping with your aunt today, but when he says sorry tomorrow with few kisses, you'D stupidly get into again. and everyday the guy'll hurt you, but you'll keep sayin i forgive u,

to maintain a strong relationship."
wait for the one who was meant for you, if you're happy with heartbreaks, keep on!!! Cheesy
Beautygyal (f)
Re: Can U Maintain A Long Distance Relationship & What Can U Do To Make It Work?
« #60 on: December 24, 2006, 11:41 PM »

@ mascalurs Hope it works out for the 2 of u.

Merry Christmas evry1
anizzle (m)
Re: Can U Maintain A Long Distance Relationship & What Can U Do To Make It Work?
« #61 on: December 30, 2006, 03:36 AM »

i know a whole lot of them don't work,but i intend 2 make mine work, the truth is we just can't imagine being with anyone else of after 3yrs of crazy and still boiling love, i call her every hour and she can't seem to stop herself from doing the same, its about love: its d strongest force in the world n evry will be resolved in its direction,
its not the relationship,its about the love in it
ollyruffy
Re: Can U Maintain A Long Distance Relationship & What Can U Do To Make It Work?
« #62 on: December 30, 2006, 08:00 PM »

yeah! i can
Bolarge (m)
Re: Can U Maintain A Long Distance Relationship & What Can U Do To Make It Work?
« #63 on: April 27, 2007, 10:30 AM »

Quote from: macalurs on December 22, 2006, 06:24 PM
To me, I see it as an investment that'll will pay the world over when we're finally in each others arms. One day I told her I said "Baby I'll remember these days and I'll tell our kids that I loved their mother so much I travelled accross the world to spend a few days with her." She was crying. Words like these keep long-distance relationships alive.

 OMG. That is soo touching. .  Cry Cry
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